Chapter Seven – Easier
Oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no…
On and on the bad thoughts battered Fluttershy’s conscience. She looked all around her except at Pinkie Pie, who she couldn’t believe was silently standing still. The pegasus mare closed her eyes. Tears gathered within the lids.
“I’m sorry.”
It was barely a squeak. Like a mouse’s whisper. Fluttershy galloped down the stairs. She heard Pinkie call after her.
“W-wait Fluttershy!”
But Fluttershy would never do such a thing. She had seen the look in Pinkie’s eyes after the kiss. She had seen that look. That darned look.
Fluttershy knew…
She just knew!
…
Pinkie didn’t feel the same way about her.
The walk around the outside of the stadium took Fluttershy longer than she anticipated. Minutes of tearful running stretched on like hours with her dark thoughts clouding her better judgement. A rush of snowy air and cold blew the strands of pink that had snuck out of the winter hat on Fluttershy’s head. She stopped running and looked up to the sky.
Her tears had all streamed out and in a temporary moment of dryness she beheld the early evening moon. It was an ivory, pockmarked globe glowing against a sea of deep purple water speckled with tiny shimmering balls of white fire. It was like a sun in the middle of night. Fluttershy closed her eyes and sighed.
Well, that’s that then.
She forced one side of her mouth upwards in a pathetic smile attempt.
Not quite what Rarity had in mind, but at least I got my feelings across, right?
Fluttershy hung her head.
The answer’s no. Okay. So now I know. But how…
She shook her head and grit her teeth, feeling fresh tears building.
What do I do now?
Another rush of air. It was as if the early night chill of Vanhoover was pushing Fluttershy forward. It knocked her out of her unsure thoughts and pointed her in the right direction. It was leading her back to the front of the stadium where her friends were waiting. Yes, she had to go there. Life went on, after all.
She’d be fine after a good night’s rest. A voice carried on the wind from behind.
“Fluttershy! Wait, Fluttershy!”
But Fluttershy would not wait. There wasn’t a chance, not one. She sighed and walked forward, building into a steady trot. She cleared her mind of what had happened.
Thinking about it would just cause pain.
Because of the headstart Fluttershy had on Pinkie, she was able to trot back to the stadium’s front even with Pinkie at a full gallop. Pinkie was out of breath by the time she reached the other five mares, whereas Fluttershy looked calm and collected, though she had adjusted her hat so the front of her mane fell over and hid most of her face.
“Uhhh,” Applejack asked, one eyebrow raised in utter confusion. Fluttershy saw that her other friends looked equally as bewildered. Applejack cleared her throat and continued, “Did we, err, miss something, or?”
Fluttershy was at a loss for words. The weight of what had happened bared itself on her again. She had to look down to the snow-kissed stone slabs of the stadium walkway and focus on not crying. She heard Rarity’s voice.
“Obviously our two winning mares were crying tears of joy!”
Rarity laughed and patted Fluttershy’s shoulder. Fluttershy looked up at Rarity, all her strength focused on holding the salty liquid back behind her eyes. Rarity’s smile was so genuine and reassuring, Fluttershy believed the lie for a minute even though she had lived the truth. Fluttershy managed a convincing smile of her own.
“T-that’s right!” Fluttershy confirmed, and it scared her how she believed herself. She forced out a happy sniffle and even reached over and rubbed Pinkie’s back like a friend would.
Just a friend.
“Pinkie and I cried so many tears of joy, well, we’re pretty pooped now, so let’s get back, okay?” Fluttershy turned and started walking away, Rarity right on her tail. The other friends exchanged weird looks before following Rarity and Fluttershy. Pinkie stayed near the back, silent.
Pinkie was silent.
Fluttershy took notice right away but didn’t have too much time to mull it over. Rarity whispered to her, head turning back to the other mares from time to time.
“Darling… what happened? Did you tell her?”
Fluttershy tightened her top and bottom lips together into a determined yet quivering line. Her ears twitched.
“Not really, no,” Fluttershy said in her best normal voice. “Everything’s fine, like you said. I’m just tired.”
Rarity growled with annoyance.
“Come on, Fluttershy! Obviously, everything is not alright! Are you sure that you left your talk with Pinkie with the right impression?! I mean—”
Fluttershy stopped and sighed. She turned to Rarity, and Rarity couldn’t believe the look on Fluttershy’s face. Her brows were straight and determined. Her mouth was an open “O”. It was almost as if the words couldn’t come out.
“I took your advice and did something I would never do normally. I keep quiet and don’t do adventurous things exactly because of this.”
Fluttershy looked down.
“This is a good example of why I just keep quiet. I’m not like you Rarity.”
Fluttershy continued her walk. The other mares caught up.
Twilight, eyebrows pointed toward her snout, approached her friend. “Rarity what’s really going on with Fluttershy? This is too quiet, even for her!”
Rarity’s brow faltered.
“W-well…” she said quietly. Her gaze travelled to Rainbow, who scratched the side of her head with a bemittened hoof, then onto Applejack who flicked her eyebrows up as if to signal, “Well?”
Then, Rarity saw Pinkie. Rarity couldn’t quite tell what Pinkie was thinking - she had the “blank look” that Pinkie sometimes got when she had retreated into her mind. But Pinkie snapped out of it with a shake of her head and her mouth became an open “O’. She looked surprised. Rarity saw some gears turn in Pinkie’s head, and then, the party pony returned to normal.
“Oh! It’s really nothing, Twilight!” Pinkie cried, hopping up to her friend’s side. She giggled her normal Pinkie giggle. “Like Rarity said, we just got a lot of happy crying out!” There was a pause. Pinkie turned toward Fluttershy, who was still slowly walking forward.
“Right, Fluttershy?”
All five mares waited for the response. Fluttershy continued to look away from everypony. After a few seconds, she slowly turned around, hooves crunching against the snow underneath. Her eyes were closed, and she wore a light smile.
“Right, Pinkie!”
It’s easier this way.
Twilight looked at Applejack and the cowpony shrugged. Rainbow Dash continued to rub her head.
“Wait, what happened… or didn’t happen…? I f-feel out of the loop here, gals.”
Rarity giggled and rolled her eyes playfully.
“Nothing really, dear. Come on now, I’m sure you and Pinkie are dying to try out that pool back at the hotel — and on such a chilly night!”
Rainbow’s face erupted into happiness as she remembered. She leapt over at Pinkie and stopped the party mare.
“The pool! I almost forgot! You excited, Pinkie?”
Rainbow didn’t notice that Pinkie had a different expression for a split second before becoming the normal Pinkie again.
“Buhhh — yeah of COURSE!” Pinkie screamed. Her and Rainbow went on and on about the pool, the other mares finding their own conversation. Rarity trotted back up to Fluttershy but gave up on trying to get much more information out of her before long.
And so, the six friends meandered their way back to the hotel. As Rarity said, it was chilly, but the good times and future good memories warmed the mares and touched their spirits. It was a beautiful night with a sky that reminded Rarity of her very own mane with its color. It was a rare thing in Vanhoover, or so they heard ponies say.
Yes, the trip back was a joyful one, if what Fluttershy heard was any indication. She certainly heard the joy in Pinkie’s giggles and words. It made Fluttershy smile to herself as she walked slightly ahead of the others.
Yeah, this will be much easier. We’ll just… we’ll just pretend it didn’t happen.
Fluttershy closed her eyes and her smile grew and grew.
What I’ll do is pretend nothing happened! Pinkie is a good friend; she won’t ask me about it!
A tear plopped out of the corner of Fluttershy’s eye and rolled down her cheek, freezing not long after its birth into the cold Vanhoover night.
* * *
“CANNONBALLLLLLLL!”
Pinkie’s scream echoed off of every wall in the hotel pool at least a hundred times. The waves that curved out of the pool as she smashed into the water’s surface crashed against the ponies on the deck. One such pony was Rarity, seated on a lounger, whose wide-brimmed sunhat became a droopy little thing after Pinkie’s wave hit her. Rarity’s mane also broke from its shape into a purple drape, falling against one side of her neck and upper body. She looked at her hooves, mouth fallen and at a loss for words.
“Hey, u — P-Pinkie!” she cry-whined. She turned to Twilight, who had just sat back down in her own lounger with a giggle. The unicorn levitated two clean, white towels, one that she brought right into Rarity’s hooves, and the other that she levitated over to Fluttershy, seated on a lounger beside Rarity.
Rarity pouted with crossed hooves after wrapping the towel up in her mane.
“Next year we’re going to Monacolt, so I can sunbathe on the beach and not get covered in water!”
Twilight chuckled again. She leaned up and looked over at Fluttershy, who was clearly deep in thought.
“Fluttershy?” she asked. Fluttershy stirred. She looked at her friend as if she had been somewhere else. Fluttershy smiled, and Twilight felt reassured because it looked like one of Fluttershy’s normal little demure smiles.
“Oh, I was just thinking about Angel Bunny and the other animals,” Fluttershy said, and Twilight again was reassured. It was Fluttershy’s normal voice. Fluttershy continued, “I trust Discord and everything, but you… know how Angel can be.”
“And Discord, too,” Twilight added, laughing. Fluttershy returned the laugh.
“And Discord too, haha.”
Twilight leaned back and sighed happily.
“Girls, I think this trip was a great success! And it was all thanks to yours truly!”
Another one of Pinkie’s splashes erupted from the pool and drenched Twilight. When the torrent subsided, Twilight sat blinking with a mated mane like melted cheese. Rainbow Dash, in the pool, lost herself in a fit of giggles.
“Hey look… it’s Twilight Showers!” she managed between breathes.
Rarity brought a hoof to her mouth and snickered. Fluttershy laughed, too. Everypony would definitely think she was just her normal self. In the pool, Applejack snuck up behind Rainbow Dash and used her tail to splash a huge wave of water at the Pegasus.
“Yea and look,” Applejack said with a chuckle as Rainbow spit out water, “It’s Rainbow Splash!”
Everypony but Rainbow laughed. Rainbow did smile playfully, however, and crossed her hooves as her wings flapped her out of the water.
“Yeah yeah. You just took my joke; yours wasn’t THAT funny.”
“GERONIMOOOOOOO!”
Pinkie roared and her third cannonball into the pool produced what could only be described as a tsunami. The resulting wave washed over the ponies on the deck and carried them, loungers and all, into the pool.
Rainbow came spurting out of the water, the stream she spat like something from a fancy fountain. The other mares, plus a few other ponies who were inside the pool room, eventually came up coughing.
“S-seriously?!” Rainbow shouted at her pink friend, who was treading water and snickering. The laughter seemed to be contagious since next Rarity was giggling. Then, Twilight. Applejack stared at Rainbow and laughed. The pegasus racer looked at Fluttershy, who also quietly laughed into her hoof. Finally, Rainbow gave up and chuckled.
What happened after that was hours of literal horseplay and joking in the pool. Even quiet Fluttershy and ladylike Rarity took part. All six friends forgot about anything outside the pool room and engaged in their jibes like fillies at a summer party. There were races from one end of the pool to the other (the competitive nature of Rainbow and Applejack was forgotten and replaced with laugh-ridden half attempts), splashfests, breath holding contests… the sheer level of foal-like revelry made some of the older ponies on the pool’s deck shake their heads.
By the time everypony decided that they were wet and pruney enough, it was late and even Rainbow Dash was tuckered out from the physical activity. When the adrenaline wore off as everypony dried and trudged out to the hotel hallway, each mare felt the weight of the day bear down on them and their shoulders slumped on the walk back to their rooms.
“H-hay,” Applejack said with a yawn, “Suppose that’s one way to end the day. Ah’m gonna be out like an old candle soon as ah hit the pillow, no doubt…”
Rarity opened her mouth and daintily yawned.
“I agree. I don’t gallivant like that very often. It really takes its toll on you without you even noticing.”
And dear Fluttershy, who had been so back to normal since the group left the Horseton Stadium, was drifting off to sleep mid-stride. She stumbled into Pinkie Pie without even realizing it. The Earth Pony mare, with a bit more of a presence in the waking world than Fluttershy, noticed and smiled softly. She walked with Fluttershy leaning against her for support.
Before long, the six mare friends reached their two shared rooms and everypony said goodnight. Pinkie blinked her heavy eyelids back up to their resting spots, though she knew she could not do it for much longer as she pushed her and Fluttershy’s hotel room door open. She continued to lead Fluttershy’s body along. Fluttershy hummed happily and spoke in her sleepy state.
“Little… baby… bunnies…” she said with a sigh. Pinkie didn’t have the energy to laugh but she did smile. She led Fluttershy to the shared bed, finding her footing thanks to the soft moonlight peeking inside the room from the window. Pinkie helped Fluttershy into her side of the bed first, being gentle yet firm so that Fluttershy was in the comfiest position for her: on the side, with wings raveled up.
Then, Pinkie got into bed. She didn’t last too long in the real world and drifted off to sleep not long after Fluttershy.
* * *
The line between dreaming and being awake was slithering its way around Fluttershy’s mind. She felt as if she were in the out-of-body state that one sometimes finds oneself in in the morning after waking for a few minutes then falling back asleep. Fluttershy wasn’t sure what was real or not, though she definitely heard words from a familiar voice.
“Can I cuddle with you? I’m… I’m a bit cold…”
The voice sounded so familiar. It came from something beside her. Fluttershy’s half-asleep brain reasoned it must have been Pinkie, but the tone wasn’t right. Pinkie was loud and confident —Pinkie wouldn’t be quiet and unsure like the voice Fluttershy heard. Nevertheless, the pegasus mare was not in the mood or the state to argue with voices in her dreamlike mind. She “mhm’d” a response.
Soon after (at least it felt like soon after), something warm embraced her from the back. Fluttershy was so exhausted from the day before that she was mostly in a dream world full of an infinite number of woodland critters of all sizes. Only briefly did she realize that another part of her was in the real world, and it was being hugged by something that could only be described as a furry furnace.
Fluttershy, in both worlds, smiled wide. Everything about the sensations, imagined and tangible, was perfectly right.
The dream world took over in earnest, and Fluttershy slumbered on until morning.