Equestria has long since been a land of myth and magic, with all the land’s denizens having colorful, awe inspiring, or unbelievable legends which defy explanation and boggle the mind. Some of these tales are easy to dismiss as fables, such as the story of the Olden Pony, yet others aren’t so easy to debunk.
With the steady exploration of the land, sea, and air, new and astounding creatures have been and occasionally still are discovered from time to time - still, reports abound of beasts which may or may not truly exist. The Mothmare and Bighoof are two of the more well known cryptids of Equestria, although the mystery surrounding them pales in comparison to another. Among all the mythical beasts which allegedly haunt the world, there is one oddity which stands head and shoulders above the rest…
Cheeseblood
Having supposedly appeared across every corner of Equestria, the pony seems almost too impossible to exist. So named because of her appearance, with a yellow, cheese-like coat and blood red wings and tail, her form is paradoxical in figure. Her - yes, her - predominant characteristics are that of an everyday bat pony, although she also has a crimson horn.
Singular anatomy aside, another curious note about her is her alleged behavior. Though there are several ponies who claim they’ve encountered her, she’s never been known to actually talk. At most, she’ll emit various tones of a squeal, although the exact pitch and context differ from encounter to encounter. While she has shown some limited intelligence and a rudimentary capacity to communicate, it’s unknown if she has the physical or mental capacity to speak.
Surely, considering that she’s reputedly some aberrant type of alicorn, whatever power she has would be considerable - that being said, the most she’s purportedly done is appear and disappear at random. The full extent of her capabilities are as mysterious as she is, although it’s also been reported that she can produce items seemingly at random. What little details about her are exacerbated by the glaring lack of reputable witnesses.
The small amount of testimony that there is on Cheeseblood is slim, considering many are reluctant to step forward and openly talk about seeing or interacting with her. Many would be labeled a crackpot or dismissed outright for seeing such an odd creature, yet there are those who insist she’s real. What follows is a claim from one Ms. Leech, a bystander who insists she’d met the mythical beast.
~
“Stupid cold wind,” Leech groused, sheltering a small fire within an emptied coffee can.
Under the relative shelter of a cobblestone bridge, protected from the worst of the elements, she shivered slightly. With winter approaching soon, she’d have to find somewhere a bit more insulated to spend her nights - if she didn’t, she’d be in a world of trouble. Fashioning a makeshift windbreak from a discarded pallet, she went to toss some kindling into the tiny flame - that was, until a blanket was draped over her back.
“What the…” she trailed off, twisting her head in surprise.
There, standing just behind her, was one of the strangest equines she’d ever laid eyes upon. It almost looked like a bat pony mare, were it not for the horn sprouting from its forehead. Besides the odd bony protuberance, the mare’s mane and tail clashed in color, being a midnight blue and rich crimson prospectively. Whoever she was, she looked friendly enough, though that hardly answered where she’d come from or why she’d given up a perfectly good blanket.
Pushing herself up, Leech turned to greet her unexpected guest. “Thanks,” she began, extending a hoof, “you looking for a place to spend the night too?” The peculiar pony nodded, but didn’t say a word. “You - uh - got a name?” she asked, slowly withdrawing her foreleg.
“Eee,” the thing squeaked, leaping forward and giving the unicorn a hug.
Leech went rigid for a moment, before reluctantly returning the embrace. She’d met her fair share of oddballs throughout her wanderings, but this one may have taken the cake. Pulling away, giving the bat pony thing another look, she knit her brow. There was definitely a horn and wings on the creature - that or the mushrooms she’d foraged earlier weren’t quite as edible as she’d thought.
“Eee - huh,” she grunted, taking a small step backwards. “Can you talk or -”
“Eee-ee eeee ee ee EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” the possible hallucination excitedly peeped.
Looking the mare from top to bottom, honestly wondering if the critter was a figment of her imagination, Leech knit her brow. Even if the bizarre pony was real, considering it was just making such strange noises, she doubted communication would be the simplest thing - that being said, it seemed to understand her to a degree. Sidling over to her bag, taking care to keep her eyes on her guest, she retrieved an overly ripe mango she’d found in the local grocery store’s dumpster.
Wiping off the gently used fruit, which she’d been sure to wash earlier, she offered it to the stranger. “Want to share!”
“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” the mare squealed, prancing in place. The impromptu and overly joyous display came to an abrupt end, as she stopped dead and thoughtfully held a hoof to her chin. “Eee…”
“I...what? I’m sorry, I don’t talk - Hey! Where are you going?” Leech blurted, watching the beast scamper away.
Darting out of view, behind the structure of the bridge, the strange equine reappeared almost instantaneously with a large, Hearth’s Warming-like sack over her shoulder. As she deposited the oversized bag onto the cool ground, she rummaged around and produced a large can of nacho cheese and a box of taco shells. It was an exceedingly odd display, but the sight of something edible besides expired produce set the unicorn’s mouth watering.
Leech had seen some weird shit in her day, including that one time a timberwolf mistook her for its welp, but ranked way up there. Regardless of how peculiar her evening had become, she knew two things; firstly, it’d be the first time she hadn’t eaten something out of the trash in over a week and, secondly, her mysterious visitor needed a name. Glancing between the obscene tin of non-dairy cheese product and the bat-thing’s scarlet wings, she scrunched her snout.
“Since talking doesn’t seem to be your strong suit, I’m going to call you Cheeseblood,” she cheerfully remarked.
“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” her guest merrily shrieked, giving her a second hug.
“Ok ok, let’s all calm down for a second - say, you wouldn’t have any plates in that big sack of yours, would you? I left mine in my other box,” Leech joked, patting the mare’s back.
Jumping back and all but diving into her bag, Cheese quickly emerged with two positively gorgeous pieces of china flatware and a pile of forks, knives, and spoons. Setting the plates and silverware on the ground, she lifted the nacho topping and sank one pronounced fang into the lid. In the blink of an eye, she’d cleanly shorn the top off the can and sat the open container between herself and her vagabond host.
“Eee,” she placidly intoned, tossing one of the spoons into the goopy, hydrogenated substance.
“You know, I really wasn’t expecting to run into anyone tonight,” Leech chuckled, opening the package of pre-formed taco shells and passing one to her guest, “but I sure as heck ain’t gonna complain.”
Nodding eagerly, Cheese sawed the softened fruit from around the oversized pitt. “Eee.”
With the arrangements in place, the two set upon their little meal in relative silence. Despite the glaring lack of conversation, Leech was happy to have some company. She’d met all sorts of creatures on the road - some good, some not so good - but Cheeseblood was definitely one of the weirder ones - if she wasn’t a hallucination, that is. It wasn’t long before they’d finished their dinner, leaving the two full and satisfied.
“There’s a fountain in the park just around the corner,” Leech noted, gathering up the dirty dishes. “I’ll go wash these up and be back in a jiffy. If you want, you can slap those pallets together with that tarp for us,” she continued, nodding towards a small pile of the wooden constructs.
With the flatware and utensils in her magical grasp, seeing Cheese nod, she trotted towards the closest watering hole. She still had next to no information on her odd visitor, but she wasn’t bothered; as far as she was concerned, the weird little mare could hang around for as long as she wanted. Humming cheerfully to herself, peeking back at her unusual new friend, she set off.
Sadly for her, upon returning to her refuge, her guest was gone. Despite her trip having only taken a hooffull of minutes, the mare had simply vanished. She spent the next two hours looking for Cheeseblood, scouring the park and surrounding area, but to no avail. The only signs that the odd creature had been there at all were the emptied can of nacho cheese, a heaping pile of silverware, the plates, and a one-night voucher for a hotel room.
It wasn’t until later, steadfastly refusing to leave her encampment, did she make a startling realization; the silverware Cheeseblood had left was actual silver! Given the current market price of the metal, if she looked around and sold it to a fair pawn shop, she’d make more than enough to secure lodgings for herself for the rest of the winter - still, that did little to brighten her mood. As far as she was concerned, she’d met and promptly lost a kind, albeit outlandish friend.
~
As you can see, the story is curious and quite likely the byproduct of an unplanned psychedelic trip fueled by unsafe mushroom consumption. Whether or not you believe the tale of Cheeseblood is up to you, although Ms. Leech maintains that she’d had additional run-ins with the possible cryptid. On the extremely slim chance that there’s an interest in reading more about this controversial creature, additional entries and encounters may follow...