Shadesong released a sigh of relief as they passed out from under the entrance to the Sapphire Depths. “We’re finally back at the camp,” he said.
The camp wasn’t terribly luxurious. A handful of tents, with a few sitting on top of a wooden deck erected, provided a flat surface to study on. The handful of scholars, priests, alchemists, and bodyguards they hired to work on whatever they found in the dungeon would typically wander around the base as their hired teams researched everything the party found. Still, night already came, and they were asleep.
Or, that’s what Shadesong wanted the dragon to think. In reality, most of the ponies retreated to the town of Hopesedge. Many of them were happy to get out from under the shadow of the tower that stood a few dozen yards from the entrance to the Sapphire depths. Instead, the base camp ran on a skeleton crew of five or so guards whose job was to make the place seem lived in while the others waited in safety.
“Be it ever so humble,” Luckstep agreed, walking up to the mercenary on patrol.
“Ma’am,” the pony in the brightly-colored “uniform” greeted as he leaned over his greatsword.
“Captain,” Luckstep greeted back.
“All’s quiet up here, Ma’am. Nothing’s made so much as a peep since you’ve been down.”
“Good. The last thing we need is any surprises.”
The keyword was Shadesong’s idea, naturally. The mercenary had been told to prepare for an evacuation if the word “surprise” was used.
“Well, if any surprises do happen, we’ll be ready.”
“I say you will!” Hercule agreed. “You’re some of the best mercenaries we can hire, what with the dragon’s hoard and all.”
The mercenary nodded and smiled. “Gold does a lot of good talking, sir.”
“I’m sure it does,” Hercule said.
“More than you know,” Shadesong added. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to live my fantasy of sleeping on a massive pile of coins again.”
“Didn’t you say that hurt your back?” Brightflame asked.
“It’s a good pain.”
“Then let me introduce you to a worse pain,” a voice said behind them as the dragon played his card.
The party spun, grabbing their weapons, and the mercenary did what he had been paid to do. He grabbed a whistle and blew a loud piercing note as the dragon began to rear up, and the party scattered out of the range of its acidic cone before an iron net came crashing onto the dragon.
The iron links smashed into the dragon, weighing it down.
“Captain, get your men out of here!” Luckstep yelled to the mercenary before she prepared a spell in her paws.
The mercenary nodded before he blew his whistle three more times before he picked up his greatsword and sliced through a rope that released a wooden box. “Good hunting, Ma’am!” he called before he rushed off, taking his men with him.
The dragon roared, furious, and his voice dropped to a low growl. “You laid a trap for me? You must know I will not let you live through this.”
Dreadmane crossed the distance over to the open box the mercenary left behind and reached into it before pulling out a war hammer. “Says the dragon facing a weapon made to break it.”
The dragon growled.
---☼---
“Alright, everypony,” Rolling said with a smile. “Let’s roll initiative!”
“Let us slay a dragon!” Luna cheered with glee as she lifted the greatsword behind her in triumph. “18!”
“16!” Platinum called.
“10,” said Ivory.
“Also 10,” Sundance said.
“Really?” Ivory asked.
“I rolled an eight,” Sundance replied with a tired tone.
“25,” Caramel said, smirking.
“Alright!” Rolling said. “Give me a minute to set up the battlefield, and we’ll see if you actually manage to kill the dragon.”
Caramel stood. “While you do that, I’m going to head to the bathroom real quick.”
“Do not take too long!” Luna cried. “I shall be hard-pressed to forgive thee if I am denied the chance to kill a dragon.”
He nodded before retreating from the library and heading back into the manor. He walked the familiar path to the bathroom, and as he did, his mind began to wander. His boss, Thistle, finally seemed to calm down after his initial tantrum, and Caramel looked like he finally had a chance to get a good night’s sleep for once.
He went to the bathroom and did his business before he made his way back to the table.
“Caramel!” Luna cried the second she saw him. “Get in here! I wish to use this dragon bane hammer, and I cannot fight the dragon until thine seat is filled!”
“Can’t a stallion have enough time to go to the bathroom without being disturbed?”
“Nay! Now seat thyself!”
Caramel rolled his eyes. “As you wish, your Ladyship.”
“Alright,” Rolling said. “Let’s start.”
“Remember,” Platinum said. “Hit him with a bunch of heavy stuff as fast as you can to burn through his Legendary Resistances. Hopefully, he’ll use one to get the net off him, but we still need to go through two of them.”
Caramel smirked as he looked down at his character sheet. “Leave the first one to me.”
---☼---
Shadesong moved first. He rushed the dragon, still pinned by the large net, and the thief prepared the dagger with the unique paralyzing poison he’d been saving. The heavy mesh gave him all the advantage he needed to plunge the poisoned blade deep into the dragon’s back, dealing a vicious blow. The dragon roared but seemed unaffected by the poison, its incredible constitution overcoming some of the venom’s effects.
The creature opened its maw and unleashed a torrent of acid aimed at Brightflame. The minotaur moved too slow to get out of the way, but the spell he cast to protect him from acid helped him keep on his hooves. More worryingly, as the acid breath trailed off, it revealed a hole in the net, still hissing as the metal dripped to the ground.
Shadesong watched in horror as the monster began to tear its way free. The dragon wasn’t supposed to get out that easy. The good news was he wasn’t completely free. He only managed to wiggle halfway through the net, but the fact that he got through without much difficulty still concerned him.
Luckily, Dreadmane attacked.
“In the name of Luna!” she roared before she brought down the magical hammer.
The strike slammed into the dragon, nearly sending it to the ground as it staggered. The holy glow coming off of it no doubt adding Dreadmane’s own particular punch to the blow. The unicorn laughed before she attacked again, slamming into the dragon with another bone-shattering strike.
Brightflame answered the dragon with a spell of his own. Sparks flying from his fingers as he cast the attack, a rain of fire dropped onto the captured dragon burning its scales and scorching its back.
The dragon answered. Its long, serpentine neck swung over to Dreadmane and bit down hard, grabbing her in its teeth before he tossed her aside. The mare merely laughed.
Luckstep and Hercule moved next. The Abyssinian summoned a large, spectral scimitar to slice into the dragon before Hercule unleashed his own spell. The dragon’s eyes locked onto Hercule as the magic took hold, and the griffon knew that the duel he asked for would soon begin.
Shadesong stabbed at the monster again, hovering over it as he hovered over the dragon and drove his knife between the wing’s shoulderblades. The dragon, in response, tore himself free of the net and dragged its body out into the open before it stretched its wings and took to the skies.
Taking off, it swooped toward the griffon before its claws and teeth chomped down on him, bending armor under the incredible jaw strength.
Dreadmane charged, but the dragon was out of her reach. She couldn’t bring the war hammer to bear, but she dared not waste a moment of not hitting the beast. Without much choice, she pulled a pair of javelins off her back and threw them with all her might. They struck true, digging into the monster’s back.
Brightflame unleashed another spell, throwing up spikes from the ground that tore through draconic wings, and forced the creature back down to the earth. It landed with a devastating blow, and Luckstep moved up his spectral scimitar for another slash before a powerful, brilliant spell slammed into the dragon to light the way for another attack.
With the cleric’s guiding spell, Hercule found the brilliant weak spot left behind and struck. The blade hit a critical area in the dragon, and as Hercule’s holy radiance tore into the beast, it roared again and bit down on the paladin once more.
Shadesong moved carefully, diving underneath one of the torn wings of the dragon before stabbing into the pit between body and wing. “Come on! Die!” he cried through grinding teeth before he looked up to see the dragon staring at him, eye to eye.
He couldn’t even cry out before the dragon’s acidic breath nearly drowned him. He felt the liquid burn and bubble his skin before he passed out.
He didn’t know how long he was out, but when he opened his eyes again, Luckstep was standing over him. She picked him up onto his hooves and yelled his face. “Go, we’ve almost got him down!”
Shadesong glanced over and saw Hercule bring his blade down again, cracking one of the dragon’s horns before the rogue got his wings under him. He took off, climbing into the air as he prepared another strike.
The others were looking ragged. Half of Dreadmane’s fur was gone, and blood seeped down her side. Hercule’s armor was nearly ruined, barely hanging onto him. Brightflame’s robe hung off of him and revealed the boiling skin beneath. They were being pushed to the very edge.
Shadesong turned in the air, getting his knife ready before he dropped like a stone. He dove down and held out his blade, keeping his knife out in front of him. Shadesong fell like a star and slammed into the dragon’s back, dislocating his shoulder as he stabbed as deeply as he could.
---☼---
Rolling looked up at him from over her screen. “Alright,” she said. “How do you want to do this?”
A roar shot up from the table as six rounds and an hour-and-a-half came to a close. “I guess,” Caramel said as he watched the rest of his friends listen intently to the narration he earned by right of conquest. “I guess then since I’m diving for him, that the best move that makes the most sense is that I hit him with my body so hard that I knock some of his vertebrae out of line.”
“Are you saying you want to break the dragon’s back with a rogue?” Platinum asked.
“I’m not saying I snap it like a twig,” Caramel said. “I’m saying I hit it in the right place and gave him a fatally serious spinal misalignment.”
Rolling smiled. “By a stroke of luck,” she began. “Just as Dreadmane was about to unleash another blow of her hammer into the dragon’s jaw, Shadesong dove through the sky like a screaming meteor and slammed into one of the dragon’s spines along his back. As the hammer blow hit at the same exact moment, you both managed to turn the dragon’s head too far one way and its body in the other direction, snapping its neck. Congratulations, you have killed Ergenth the Clever.”
Cheers erupted around the table, and Luna held her greatsword aloft in celebration. “Huzzah! Great Sky above, we killed a dragon!”
“A pretend dragon, Luna,” Caramel reminded her.
“Do not ruin my fun, Caramel, I warn thee,” she replied.
“Alright, alright,” Rolling said. “Let’s bring it back in. The camp took the attack about as well as you did, and the hissing acid that splashed onto it is still bubbling. Your Landsknechts are returning at this point, carrying their massive swords and giving low whistles of appreciation at your kill.”
“I hereby claim the skull!” Luna declared as Dreadmane. “To mount in my tent.”
“You can have it,” Caramel said as Shadesong. “I just need a moment to rest.”
“Dreadmane picks thee up,” Luna said, “and begins to carry thee to thine tent.”
Caramel raised an eyebrow. “What are you doing, Dreadmane?”
“Thou art a victor, sir!” she replied. “And victors, especially exhausted ones, deserve to be carried!”
“So you’re carrying me to my tent?”
“Art thou going to complain?” Luna asked, smirking the entire time.
Caramel finally smiled. “I suppose not.”
“Ooh…” Ivory cooed scandalously across the table. “Is Dreadmane going to partake of the forbidden fruit that is Shadesong?”
“First and foremost,” Luna began. “That was, as thou say, cheesy enough that I think I just bit into a block of cheddar, and second, Dreadmane is suffering a few acid burns. Sleep is quickly becoming the only thing on her mind.”
“Honestly, I think Shadesong’s in the same bed,” Caramel said.
The others blinked.
Luna glanced over to him. “Did you perhaps mean ‘boat,’ or did the saying change?”
Caramel tried to correct himself, but the others were laughing too loud to hear him.
---☼---
Caramel got up, yawning as his day began. His breakfast consisted of a toaster pastry, and he typically picked up a coffee once he got to his job. The small pastry popped up and out of the toaster, and he began wolfing it down as quickly as he could as he made his way out of his small apartment.
He closed the door and began to run down the stairs as quickly as possible before he broke out into the early morning of the seaside town.
Caramel made his way to the book store and walked in.
Beans blinked as she watched him walk in. “Caramel?”
“Hey, Beans, can you set me up with my usual while I get ready?”
“Get ready?” Bean repeated before her eyes widened. “Oh, you don’t know.”
“Know what?” Caramel asked.
“You’re... you’re not on the schedule.”
Caramel stopped. “What?”
“You’re not on the schedule.”
“I don’t have any hours this week?”
“You’re not even listed.”
Caramel blinked again. “Did...did Thistle fire me?”
“I mean, he’s got to tell you, right?” Beans said. “He can’t just fire you without telling you.”
Caramel walked past her into the store’s backroom, where the brown tiles marked the employee area. The schedule hung from a corkboard hung in the middle of the hallway, stapled together. Caramel pulled it down and began checking the charts, reading every line as he went through it.
He read through each line without finding his name at all.
“Where’s my name?” he asked aloud.
“So you decided to show up for work, huh?”
Caramel spun to see Thistle standing in the door of his office. “A little too late at this point.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You missed a few days last week,” he said. “It happened so much I had to let you go.”
“What are you talking about?” Caramel repeated.
“Didn’t you get your warnings?” Thistle said, a smile growing on his face. “I suppose they didn’t get through the mail yet.”
Caramel blinked at the audacity. “Did...did you fire me by mail?”
“Your various infractions should be very well documented that way.”
Caramel’s eyes narrowed. “You spineless…”
Thistle shrugged. “Get out of my store, Caramel. Your last paycheck’s in the mail.”
Caramel glared at his former employer for a long moment. Thoughts of bashing his head in with one of the coffeepots sprang to mind, but instead, he clenched his jaw and began walking out of the back office. He walked back to the counter, where a cup of coffee waited for him.
He glanced over at Beans, who looked back at him with a hopeful glance.
Caramel shook his head. Beans frowned before she pulled him in a hug. “I’m so sorry,” she said.
Caramel sighed, his anger already leeching out of him. A part of him saw this coming. This would be the passive-aggressive move that a coward like Thistle would use. “It happens, I guess,” he said.
“Take the coffee,” she told him. “I’ll cover it, and Thistle can choke on it if he tries to pull something.”
Caramel nodded. “Thanks, Beans, you’ve been the best part of being here.”
“And don’t you forget it,” she said with a smirk. “Stay safe out there.”
Caramel nodded before he grabbed the coffee and left the bookstore. He stepped outside as the store finished opening and stood on the sidewalk for a long moment.
Well, that was it.
He’d been fired.
By mail.
By that spineless coward Thistle.
And he had no idea what to do.