//------------------------------// // Surf's Up! // Story: Mark My Words // by Goldfur //------------------------------// Twilight called for a new dimensional exploration team following the latest recalibration of her portal. I had to admit that, despite the potential Pandora’s box of unforeseen consequences, the continued exploration of the infinite multiverse did keep life interesting. I fully expected whenever Celestia and Daring Do ran out of ancient temples and cursed artifacts to chase, they would be next in line begging to jump through the portal to explore new worlds. In the meantime, Cadance decided to tag along with her husband “to see what all the fuss was about”. Not because you’re itching for some adventure and want to keep an eye on your hubby? OK, fine, Princess. Whatever you say. The exploration portal was a constant work in progress. Twilight always tweaked one aspect or another to some extent, though most of the technobabble she mumbled before every trip went over my head. The one constant of these upgrades? Worrying amounts of smoke emanated from the various gems, circuits, and boxes connected to the portal. I did notice that with each new tweak, the color of the smoke from all the bits and pieces tended to differ. My favorite had been the time the smoke was rainbow-colored. That universe was ruled by a single pony – Alicorn Rainbow Dash. After Twilight escaped to attend to a supposed “emergency”, I had sat on the palace garden lawn for ninety minutes listening to the monarch recounting the stories of her awesomeness. Eventually, I gave up and promised to return when my co-ruler could keep the portal open for longer than two hours. Somehow, despite the teasing of my wives, I had not made it back to that universe yet. Go figure. Today’s expedition was a bit different from the usual affair. Phil had bugged me for weeks to allow him to come along. He got tired of just hearing about the excitement second-hoof and wanted to take advantage of a long weekend to join in on the fun. His final and most convincing argument was that the Triarchs sometimes allowed our kids to come along. After assigning Crimson Boulder to guard my best friend, Rosa signed off on her husband’s mostly safe adventure. No way was I putting Phil potentially in harm’s way without that seal of approval! Twilight signaled that the portal was ready, and Shining Armor jumped into the maelstrom of energy. I nodded to Cadance and we likewise passed through the portal in quick succession. I immediately noticed that this dimension differed widely from the standard routine. I could usually count on a few constants in every universe: Mount Canterhorn, Canterlot Castle, the castle gardens, and Royal Guards. Today they were all missing. In the place of the castle and gardens was a very large beach hut surrounded by palm trees. They fit in well with the changed location: a white sand beach that stretched from horizon to horizon with a sparkling blue ocean keeping it company. Instead of Royal Guards, stallions and mares chatted under umbrellas and lounged on beach blankets. The two locals who jogged up to the party wore no armor. In place of spears, they carried surfboards. I had to smile when I heard my childhood friend gasp behind me. Trust Phil’s dumb luck to choose to come along on a mission to a beach paradise. The pair of approaching stallions looked the newcomers up and down. The light-brown earth pony stopped gaping long enough to say to me, “Gnarly entrance, dudes! You here to catch a wave? Boards are up against the hut. Help yourselves!” “Actually, we’re from another dimension,” I said. “We travel from world to world to open trade and spread friendship. We’re hoping to talk to whoever is in charge.” The two surf ponies exchanged looks, then the teal pegasus said, “Sounds heavy, man. You probably want to talk to the Big Kahuna or one of her crew. That’s her surf shack by the way.” They didn’t have a princess? I assumed the portal had simply opened in a different area of Equestria. Maybe Canterlot Castle didn’t exist in a dimension with no princesses to occupy it. Penumbra cocked her head. “The Big Kahuna?” The two stallions pointed out onto the ocean where a huge wave was just coming in. My jaw dropped at what I beheld. It looked like Princess Celestia… sort of... except this version had a light-sandy color to her body. Then it occurred to me that this could be best described as a ‘tanned’ look. The alicorn wore a Hawaiian shirt and had a white bit of sunscreen on her nose. The mare smiled broadly and waved, all while maneuvering her board to stay near the crest. Unlike Marklestia who could find a way to drown in a teacup of water, this Celestia could “hang ten” with the tips of her hooves extending past the end of the longboard. I turned to say something to Cadance but froze when I saw another figure zooming in on the same wave. The purple mare sped below Celestia, sharing a hoof clop as she passed. The smaller alicorn rhythmically shifted her weight to propel her board off the top of the wave. She grabbed it with one hoof while spinning to land point first onto the wave face. Her wings did not open nor did her horn light. The graceful jump had been executed with nothing but skill. Both the headband of flowers and the geometric tattoo that stretched across her back suited this alicorn perfectly. If witnessing Big Kahuna surf-master Celestia was a bit jarring, beholding what I could only describe as a wahine Twilight was unbelievable. If nothing else, it proved that the Twilight in this dimension was still Celestia’s student. Though the curriculum she was learning was no doubt vastly different. A loud and familiar gasp behind me told me that our Twilight had stepped through the portal in time to see her counterpart’s acrobatics. I turned to see Cadance and Penumbra staring at our gobsmacked Princess of Friendship. The pair fell onto their backs, laughing up a storm. Twilight didn’t notice. I wondered if I needed to step in front of my co-ruler to snap her out of her catatonia. Meh. Not my job. I turned and grinned at Phil. “I think we can wait for the Big Kahuna to finish her set to talk. Let’s catch a wave in the meantime.” He smirked. “Last one to grab a surfboard is buying!” Except he yelled that over his shoulder as he was galloping toward the shack. The jerk! As I ran after him, I put another tally-mark on the “Get Back At Phil” clipboard in my head. # # # # # # # # #