//------------------------------// // Battered and Bruised Part 1 // Story: She Drives Me Batty // by I Thought I Was Toast //------------------------------// The yelling continued for hours; they were still yelling even as I curled up under my covers. Except it wasn't at me. Mom and Dad were fighting.... They never fought like this. And it was over what I had done. “We can’t just look the other way about this, Tempered!” Over and over… I’d heard that part three— no, four times from Mom. “Discord damn it, Morning! I’m not saying we ignore it, I’m saying you need to think about—” And there was Dad rumbling like thunder. “I don’t care that this is a thestral thing! Don’t say it again, Tempered! It’s not an excuse here! Lines were crossed; she needs to face consequences!” That made me flinch and squiggle deeper in my bed. “And I don’t care about your bucking consequences! I’m telling you she’s gonna punish herself enough as it is!” The house shook with more literal thunder as Dad stomped, making my ears flatten as I curled up tight with a whimper and a sniff. “You think I don’t know tha—” Mom’s voice briefly blared louder as my door opened and closed, but then the darkness got a little deeper, and the yelling cut off into moon-blessed silence. There wasn’t really any noise as whoever it was trotted over—not even the soft thwump of clouds—but there was only one other adult it could be. “What the buck are you doing in my room?” I somehow managed to pull myself up and glare, though the wet, snotty sniffle kinda ruined it. “Get out.” “What? I’m not allowed to check up on my favorite niece?” Aunt Mercy’s grin was smug as a slug, though it paled in comparison to the sinfully slinky, Nightmare-black dress she was wearing. “I’m not in the mood,” I growled. “Get. Out.” “No.” Tail lashing, my aunt tsked and instead sat on her haunches. “Somepony needs to make sure you’re alright, and since Tempered and Morning are sizing their britches, I figured—” “You figured wrong. Now, get out.” With a grunt, I pounded my hoof in the bed and turned on my side to brood. There was silence for a time—no yelling—and it was far too good to be true. Peek back around, I saw Aunt Mercy hadn’t moved. She sat still in the darkness, eyes glinting as she waited. I ignored her a bit more, then I peeked back. She was still the same. My tail lashed and my fangs gnashed, wings rustling as I returned to my thoughts. She would get bored and leave soon enough. But as time went on, and the silence stayed, Aunt Mercy never seemed to move whenever I peeked back. She was still as a statue—disciplined, patient, everything a guard should be. She wasn’t— I shivered and closed my eyes as I remembered just how angry I’d been. “Please… I’m fine…. Go away.” “No, you’re not fine, and I think I’ll stay here, thank you very much.” Aunt Mercy finally moved, if only to languidly stretch her wings and lounge out on the floor. “Was in the middle of getting ready to go on a hot date with your Mom when you busted down the door, bawling like a newborn pup. It’s only fair that I ruin your night if you ruined mine.” “My night’s already ruined, thanks,” I deadpanned. With a fanged cackle, my Aunt threw back her head. “Screeheehee! Oh, you say that, but I see a broody bat with a full night of teenage drama ahead of her~ You aren’t gonna keep that if I have anything to say about it.” “Well, you don’t, so—” “Oh shut it for a second and think, would you?” The glower was venomous enough to get me to shrink back. “I get that you have issues with me right now, but I’d be here regardless if I was your aunt or your mom. This has nothing to do with that.” “Then why are you here?” I rolled on my back to look at the ceiling. “Two reasons.” There was a soft snort followed by a tsk as Aunt Mercy scowled at the door. “First, I may love Tempered and Morning to pieces, but they should know better than to be doing all that hollering where you can hear. They’re lucky Pushing and the twins are being watched by that crazy witch who works at the bakery, otherwise I mighta had to sock some sense into them. Still might, honestly. Jury’s still out.” With a heavy sigh, I rose up in protest only to flump face first into the bed. “Please don’t. There’s already been enough fighting today.” “Yeah, I heard about you and those other idiots. Twenty to one odds? Good job, squirt. They had it coming.” I tried to look up and scowl at her, but just couldn’t. She was right. They had had it coming. That wasn’t the problem. “You know you give yourself too much shit, right?” A hoof gently touched my back; I didn’t pull away. “Your dad would have done the same thing at your age, and I would have, too. Even your mom would have done it, not that you’ll probably ever catch her saying so. It’s her job to make sure you don’t get in any crazy fights.” The hoof gently pressed forward, not rubbing but just… sharing its presence. “And it's my job as the resident troublemaker to tell you that sometimes causing a ruckus is worth it.” “I already know that.” I sniffed. Hesitating, the hoof almost pulled back. “Then what is the problem?” “Simple.” I huffed and snorted into the cloud covers. “Lines were crossed, boundaries broken. I didn’t protect the school from a bully; I smashed his face in because I wanted to see him hurt.” Licking my lips, I gulped with a throat as dry as a desert. Little trails of tears caked my muzzle from where the salt stuck to my coat, and no matter how much I shoved my face in my bed it neither washed me clean nor slaked the thirst. “He. Hurt. Diamond.” My fangs were bared as I said it, though I couldn’t tell if it was meant for me or Crusty. “He hurt all my friends just to get at me and prove a point, and it worked. Guards aren’t supposed to take things personally. We protect; we defend; we—” “We breathe, soldier.” Aunt Mercy gave a hollow laugh from behind me. “We live and breathe. Don’t forget that. You more than anypony should know the Guard is much more than a bunch of emotionless statues. Don’t beat yourself up for being equine.” I gloomily sulked into my clouds. “Bah. Don’t wanna believe me? Fine, but you aren’t staying here tonight.” With sudden and jarring force, I was rolled off the bed. “Get up. We’re going stargazing.” “Stargazing?” Blinking up at Aunt Mercy a couple of times, I then glanced towards my door. “What about—” “Your Mom can eat me out all she likes when we get back. I don’t care. If she’s gonna be the strict mom, then I'll be the fun one.” Sweet stars of Luna that was one intense eyebrow waggle. “You’re so tense you’re like a spring about to snap. More than anything else, you need to unwind a bit so you can at least think about everything with a fresh perspective.” “But I…” Stargazing did sound nice… too nice. But if I didn’t go and Aunt Mercy bailed, it’d just be me and the yelling again, so I gave a raspy gulp and slowly got to my hooves. “I’m not going without leaving a note.” “Bah! Take all the fun out of it, then~” With a wing-covered snicker, Aunt Mercy flicked her tail. It was just so carefree, I couldn’t help but glower as I moved to my desk and jotted a quick note for Mom and Dad. “Where are we gonna go, by the way? Whitetail—” “Castle of the Two Sisters, of course.” The snicker turned to a snigger as I choked mid-sentence, my aunt arching her eyebrow sky high. “What did you expect? For me to choose some boring hill or treetops when you’re this close to somewhere so sacred? You know I’m not one to only go halfway. If I’m gonna risk pissing your parents off and ruining my chances, we’re at least going to the best damn spot I can think of.” Staring at her for a moment, I took a few deep breaths and glanced towards the door again. “You’re less likely to ruin things if we go somewhere tame.” “And? I’m guaranteed to not get in a pissing match if I abandon you here while Tempered and Morning have it out, but that’s not who I am.” With a grunt, Aunt Mercy bent down to arch her back and stretch her wings. “I run towards trouble, not away from it. Now let’s go already.” She gestured to the wall, waiting for me with that smug little smirk of hers. Edging over, I rested my hoof on the wall, took one last deep breath, and pushed my way through to plummet to the ground below. The sun had long since set. The town was quiet and dark. It was peaceful, though I feared it was nothing but the calm before the storm. The fight was too fresh, too vivid, too raw for everypony—including me. What was gonna happen tomorrow after the school had a night to soak it in? What happened when they got a real chance to talk? They’d all seen it…. They’d seen just how far I could really go. That was… just what Crusty had wanted. When I closed my eyes, I could still see the crowd, dead silent and staring. I could still see Crusty, grinning up at me even when he was slumped and unconscious on the ground. Bruised and battered… Missing teeth… Feathers askew… And in the worst of my memories, his wing looked bent and broken. I couldn’t remember hearing it snap. I never wanted to go that far. Or maybe I did, and only now that I regretted it was I trying to hide those thoughts away. Maybe I was tormenting myself for nothing. Maybe his wing wasn’t broken, and I just wanted to make myself more of a monster than I was. Fucking teenage drama. Discord damn it, Aunt Mercy was right. As she landed beside me, I hugged her tight—squeezed hard enough to make her eyes pop out. Nightmare take me if those squeaky little choking noises weren’t the most adorable thing in the world; for once she was the one squirming and blushing black. “Ack— Night— Air!” She scrabbled at the ground and tried to push away, but I was relentless in nuzzling her as I sniffled. “I get it! I get it! I’m the hottest thing since the sun itself, now back off.” “Thank you…” I murmured as I obliged, moving to wipe the newest tears from my face, though I didn’t go too far even as Aunt Mercy got all over dramatic as she gasped for breath. “And stop faking. You gotta get used to that if you wanna be my mom.” “I think you crushed a rib!” Aunt Mercy gave a faux gasp, collapsing and reaching for a nearby rose bush as she did. “Oh, Rosebud…” Somehow, that got me to chuckle. “You’re spending too much time with Ms. Rarity.” “Don’t blame me for being a hot piece of flank.” Aunt Mercy melted into her shadow only to hop right out and back to her hooves. All signs of weakness and blush were gone as she shook her rump and did very worrisome things with that slinky black dress she was wearing. “Eww…” I stuck my tongue out, scrunching my face hard to stop myself before I could start staring. “Please save that for when you’re alone with Mom and Dad.” “Screehee! I rather like being Ms. Rarity’s model, thank you very much. It’s nice to be appreciated for my confidence rather than getting another week of latrine duty from the brass.” I could already imagine Dad waggling his brow and saying, ‘Confidence? So that’s what the kids are calling it these days.’ And no, we didn’t call it that, not by a long shot, but just the thought made me sigh and rub the bridge of my muzzle with one hoof. “I should never have introduced you two.” “Oh, don’t be like that. Rarity’s a blast.” Aunt Mercy waved her hoof. “She’s certainly better than that Pink monstrosity. Easily my first real friend here, not counting your parents.” “At least you didn’t hit it off with the Pink Demon.” I shivered and looked to the sky, rustling my wings before taking off with Aunt Mercy to head towards the forest. She flew point, because of course she would, though she did look back to grin at me as we went. “That’s because she’s too naive, too gullible, and way too childish for me.” Rolling my eyes, I gave a snort and glanced at the moon to make sure we were going the right way. “Pretty sure your childishness is one of the biggest reasons Mom is gonna say no.” Aunt Mercy tittered and did a roll, her dress somehow clinging as tight as a flight suit as we soared. “Screeheehee! I’m not childish. I’m rash and risqué. She’s rated PG for pink guano; I’m rated M for Mercy. There’s a big difference.” “I’m sure there is.” I frowned at the sky. “Bank ten degrees to the right, by the way. We’re heading towards the forest but not in line with the castle.” “‘I’m sure there is~’” The high-pitched squeak was weighted with enough air quotes to nearly drop it an octave. “Come on. Lighten up!” Aunt Mercy sighed as she nonetheless banked as ordered. “Whatever. No deadbeats allowed when we’re stargazing, though.” “Does that mean I should go home then?”  “No, it doesn’t mean you shoul— Oh, ha ha. Very funny.” “Take what you can get. I’m not really in a good mood.” Even saying it, I had a ghost of a smile flashing across my face. The breeze was nice, the stars were bright, and the smell of forest almost smacked us as we hit the edge of the Everfree. It was just so calm and peaceful underneath the Nightmother’s blessed sky. After that, we glided out in relative silence for a while, but I could see Aunt Mercy just twitching to say something. The almost pitch-black canopy passed beneath us with all manner of howls and roars. Skittering, slithering, buzzes, and bellows, all sorts of beasties hunted hungrily below us, and both of us swiveled our ears to keep track of it all. There was a savage sort of rhythm to it—something wild and primal. It left my heart pounding and my nostrils flared; my eyes glinted and my fangs flashed in the light of the moon. Maybe that was why I couldn’t help joining Aunt Mercy when she threw back her head to sing in the old tongue. Screeing and reeing and calling deep into the night, our voices echoed with an empty silence—far too high in frequency for most creatures to hear. It was an old hunter’s hymn—more tall tale than not—telling of the great hero Eerie Eye and his labors of love. Long before the Nightmare and the Nightmother, before the reign of Discord or even the great exodus from the north, we sang a song from the time back when the world was new and wild, when all we had to look to was the moon. She was said to be a spirit of unrivaled beauty, a white so pale it left frost and mist in the air. Cold and clever, she was a harsh mistress who taught us the value of discipline and might. All who saw her were stricken to their core, and whenever a poor foal sought her hoof the answer was always the same: they were to bring her the heads of her children. There were twelve star beasts of unrivaled might, as well as many lesser beasts of stardust that formed as yet more tales and heroes were born. To bring the moon one of each and every one was an impossible task only the mightiest hunter could ever hope to accomplish. Thus came the tale of Eerie Eye, the one foal both strong enough and stubborn enough to prevail. It took many years and many tales and many songs, so much so that even an hour of gentle gliding left us nowhere near complete, and as our destination loomed before us, we continued on as we found a pair of gargoyles to perch with. It was… nice. We watched the stars to find each beast as it was hunted, and we circled the castle to pick new perches whenever we tired of our current ones. Baiting and feinting each other, Aunt Mercy and I would play games of cat and mouse whenever we took off. Two predators tested to see which hunter might become the hunted, though neither ever came out on top. Simple. Instinctual. Thoughtless. There was no concept of worry as I followed the song and revelled in the life of a hero passed. His journey was more important in the moment, not mine; his story was the one worth spinning, if only for the night. And like a music box, I could feel my insides unwinding as we went on and on. Muscles I hadn’t realized were clenched and knotted slowly released their grip. My ears and eyes started to droop, while my head woozily wobbled. The last thing I remembered was curling up and nuzzling into Aunt Mercy’s wing as I hummed my way off to the dreamlands. It was sometime near dawn when I groggily stirred to the flapping of wings and the heavy hoofsteps of Dad landing nearby. A quick and bleary blink out from under Aunt Mercy’s wing showed his shaggy coat was unkempt and messy, while big bags hung under his eyes. He was smiling, though. Or at least he was trying. “Well, well… Aren’t you two just the cutest thing together.” “Her? Maybe. I don’t do cute.” Aunt Mercy’s wing clutched me tighter. “But somepony had to step up while you and Morning were bitching at each other.” “Aye, you did good, Mercy, though you could have picked a better spot.” Dad chuckled and laid beside us, spreading a wing over us both. “Mrgmrff…” Burying my head under Aunt Mercy’s wing, I pretended to go back to sleep even as my ear still perked and swiveled. “Pfft! We both know that’s a lie.” Aunt Mercy threw her head back and laughed. “But we’ll pretend it’s not. What are you and Morning gonna do about it?” There was a pregnant moment of silence where only the sounds of the forest could be heard. “…Nothing.” Wings rustled around me, making it hard for me not to squeak. “Screeheehee! Called it! And what did you two finally decide, hrmmm?~” “We…” The silence was deafeningly painful as I felt Dad tense beside me. “…didn’t. There’s still a lot to figure out. A lot of what happens depends on her.”  He rested a hoof on me and I tensed. “You ready to talk, champ?” “Mrgmrff…” “You know, neither your Mom nor I blame you. I…” The hoof almost pulled back only to press closer. “…know it probably sounded like it, but you put us both in a real pickle—your mother especially. Your mother is one of the few day dwellers who gets schattenkrieg. Hay, she’s taken quite a few guano-guzzlers to the ring for us. She understands what you did, and I need you to know that, because your Mom is also the one others are gonna be questioning the most. She’s the day dweller in the family, so she’s the one they’re all going to think should have put her hoof down hardest to stop you.” “Mrgmrff…” I squirmed, and after a few more moments of silence Dad pulled his hoof away. “I should have been home more this past week.” Aunt Mercy shifted beside me. “I bet you I could have convinced her not to go through with it.” “Hah! Don’t lie.” The world shook as Dad gave a big bellowing laugh that made even the forest fall quiet. “You would have been psyching her up for it the whole time. I’m kind of glad you were so busy with Rarity.” “Yeah, well… I don’t think any of us expected things to go so far.” With an imperious sniff, Aunt Mercy’s tail lashed, kicking up a few pebbles near us and sending them plummeting off our little rooftop perch to the ground below. “No, we didn’t.” Dad sighed. “I mean, I expected something to go wrong, but not this. You know the unspoken rule.” “Aye. Everypony who’s anypony regrets their first schattenkrieg.” Stroking me with her wing, Aunt Mercy leaned down to kiss my forehead. “You should have pushed her to get a taste of real blood long before now.” “Morning wouldn’t let me, and I don’t blame her for trusting the Junior Guard to be enough. I was stupid enough to hope a real duel just might not ever come up.” “Just ‘cause she acts mature doesn’t mean she’s the perfect little guard.” My aunt tsked. “Damn it, Mercy. You think I don’t know that? I was the one trying the hardest to stop her.” The world shook again for different reasons; Dad heaved the biggest sigh I’d ever heard, and it left me shaking between him and Aunt Mercy. “Morning trusted Night to do what was right, even if she was nervous. I was the one who didn’t share that faith….” A little part of me died inside at those words. “Maybe if I had, none of this would have happened.” “Oi!” There was the telltale thunk of hoof on skull. “What kind of backwards ass thinking is that?!” “I… I don’t know?” It was hard to tell if it was Dad or I who sniffed first. “I could’ve done something different? I could have explained things better? Convinced her it was a bad idea or made her realize just how deep in it she was? She’s mature enough for that. I know she is. If I’d just found the right words, she would have taken a step back to look and see she was taking things personally. “But I didn’t.” “Mrgmrff!” No! Please! Don’t! Why would you— Discord damn it! It’s my fault, not yours! The world quailed as another sigh rolled forth. “I didn’t find the words, and maybe if I’d had more faith in you, Night, I would have.” The hoof was back and I trembled beneath its touch. “In the end, I chose to watch thinking it best you learn this lesson the hard way. If I was a better Dad, you wouldn’t have needed to.” “S-stop.” In the wake of my voice, there was quiet. Dad’s thoughtful hum trailed off, while Aunt Mercy’s scathing retort died in her throat with a hiss. “Please… It’s my fault. It’s all my fault…. It has to be.” “Why would you— Night, if I had known he was going to provoke you like that, I would never have let you go through with it. I would have taken you to the ring myself to win the right to put that schweinehund in his place.” What grey light of dawn managed to bleed over the horizon and through the wing I hid under vanished as the world grew dark and Dad gave a feral growl. “No pony deserves the horseapples that piece of guano put you through. Please don’t blame yourself for losing control.” “I have to.” “Why?!” “Because if it’s not all my fault, then I have to listen to the tiny voice inside of me that wants to blame everypony else.” I shivered and sniffed as an image of Diamond floated past my eyes. Suddenly, hiding beneath Aunt Mercy’s wing with my eyes closed was the greater evil, and I finally pulled my head out to look at Dad. “So please… let me have this? It’s easier if it’s just my fault.” Dad’s sides heaved as he growled and grappled against some unseen foe. His scowl twisted and snarled, and his eyes screwed shut as he snorted steam in the cool autumn air. “Ragger, shtagger, fragger, dagger! Nightmare take that filthy son of a wombat!” Pounding the little bit of castle we perched on, a chunk of stone cracked free to fall to the depths below. He was gone before either Aunt Mercy or I could say anything, melting into his shadow and slithering away to find his own spot to brood. It was a loud and angry brooding, with wood cracking and beasts howling; his bellowing roars and curses were matched only by the pained shrieks of whatever poor unfortunate fodder got in his way, hunters quickly getting mulched into the hunted under his wrath. His horrible, familiar wrath. It was too much too soon, and as I whimpered into Aunt Mercy’s side, she tsked and pushed my sunglasses on. Nudging me up, she took point in the air once more, and I followed, not really caring where we went. Anywhere else was better.