//------------------------------//
// Chapter 11: Lesson in Human Clothing 
// Story: Outside Reality 
// by The reluctant fan 
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Galen found Pinkie Pie giggling in the hot tub while sliding her back up against one of the jets. She looked up to see him and smiled.

“Hi Galen! I didn’t know you had a twin!”

Galen raised and eyebrow, before widening his eyes and sighing. “Pinkie, you’re seeing double. It’s time for you to get out.”

"What?! But it's so comfy in here!"

"I know, but you're gonna pass out if you don't get out soon."

Pinkie sighed and tried climbing out of the tub. Her hoof slipped on the way out however, and she went tumbling to the ground.

Galen winced. "Ouch. You okay?"

Pinkie shot up, a giant smile on her face. "That was so fun! It was so bubbly and warm in there! Can I go back in later?"

Galen gave her an odd look. "Maybe later. You should probably stay out of there for a bit. Cool down and all that. Dry yourself off before going back inside, kay?"

Pinkie nodded and then shook herself off like a dog. Galen grimaced and backed away to avoid getting wet.

"Okay! I'm all dry now, let's go back in!"

"...Sure. Warn me the next time you're gonna do that."



Galen and Pinkie entered the house once again. Pinkie bounced off to find something to do while Galen went back over to Twilight.

"Good news! Pinkie isn't dead."

"I'd call that a little more than good news!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Anyway, let's get this language barrier out of the way before I forget about it. First I guess we should go over what each of our letters sound like to see if they're in the same order or not."

"That's a good idea. Let's start with yours."

"Sigh. This is gonna take a while."

As it would turn out, their written languages were in the exact same format, just with different symbols.

"That... is really fucking dumb."

"And really coincidental. At least this will make translation a breeze."

"Yeah. All we really have to do now is make a chart saying which symbol is which."

"I can work on that. You should probably go check on Rarity. She's been upstairs for a while."

"...Yeah, good point. Imma go make sure she hasn't ruined anything."



Galen trotted into his parent's closet to find Rarity levitating multiple dresses and a sketchpad. 

"Hey, just checking up on you to make sure you haven't destroyed anything yet. What exactly are you doing?"

Startled, Rarity jumped a little. Her focus dropped and she lost concentration, dropping the dresses from her magic aura. They fell on the floor, with one landing on her head.

Removing the clothing from her head, Rarity looked behind her. "Oh, Galen darling! Sorry about the mess, I was looking through some of the dresses to see their design. Of course I would never copy one, but I was hoping that it would give me some inspiration for my own work."

"Okay... well as long as you clean up after yourself, I'm cool with it."

"Oh, darling! Before you go, I have one question. How did the creator of these dresses manage to do such a perfect sewing job? It's almost flawless on every dress!"

"Oh, that's probably because they're made in a factory by machines."

Rarity froze. "Darling. Did I hear that right? You said that these dresses were made in... factories?"

"Yeah."

Rarity's eye twitched.

"Okay look. If you're gonna go on a rant I'm just gonna leave. So why don't you calm down and tell me your thoughts in a nice, organized manner."

Rarity closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She stayed that way for about a minute before she spoke again.

"Why? And how? How would that even work? Who comes up with the design? How do you get accurate measurements if you're just mass producing them like a common item? It takes away everything that makes clothing unique!"

Galen sighed. "Look. I understand where you're coming from. You live in a society that treats clothing as nothing but vanity. Humans treat clothing as a necessity. It's taboo to go out in public without clothing on. Hell, you'd be arrested for public indecency! Everyone needs to wear clothing all day, every day. Now, if clothing were being handmade by singular designers like it is in your society, then there wouldn't be nearly enough to meet the demand of everyone."

Rarity thought on that for a moment. "I... suppose that makes sense. But what about the fitting? How do these factories know how to create clothing that fits every customer?"

"That's easy. They make general sizes for the clothing. I don't know how they size dresses because I've never wore one, but for shirts they come in sizes ranging from small to large. Then there's extra small and extra large, and sizes past that for those who need them. Pants on the other hand are measured in numbers. There are two separate measures for pants. The waist and the height."

"Ah... I suppose that would work. Do humans seriously wear clothes all the time?"

"Well, not ALL the time. Not while we're washing ourselves, or engaging in more...passionate affairs."

Catching on to the meaning, Rarity blushed and coughed. "Ahah... Yes, of course. Is that why you've been wearing that robe all day?"

Galen looked back at the bath robe he had kept on. He had put it on when he noticed the ponies approaching his house. 

"I guess. I know I'll have to get used to not wearing clothes, especially since none of mine fit me anymore, but I feel uncomfortably exposed without anything on in the presence of company."

"Well it's only natural darling. You've been used to wearing clothing all the time for your whole life, so of course a change like this would take time to adjust to. In fact, I have a marvelous idea! How about I make some new clothing for you! That way you'll have clothing that fits you, and I'll be able to experiment with more casual clothing!"

"Yeah, uh, I don't have anything to pay you with. I'm pretty sure my credit card isn't worth shit here." 

"Payment? Nonsense darling! This is free of charge!"

"You're joking right?"

Rarity gasped dramatically. "Why darling, why ever would you assume that?!"

"Generosity like this is unheard of where I come from. There's a reason the phrase 'Nothing's free in this world' is a thing. If someone was advertising 'free' products or services, there's always strings attached. Like a free trial for a program for instance. If you don't remember to cancel the trial, then it will automatically start the subscription and make you pay money."

"False advertising? How terrible!"

"Technically it's not false advertising. It's just something the company knows you'll forget about. False advertising is illegal, which is why people come up with clever ways to skim over the details, or make them hard to notice. Such is the art of capitalism."

Rarity frowned. "Are most humans like this?"

"Greedy and manipulative? Yes."

The white mare huffed. "Well! If you’re so used to such behavior, then I'll have to show you that us ponies are different! Bring some of your clothing in here darling. I need to get a good look at what it is you wear."

Taken slightly aback by Rarity's aggressive generosity, Galen nodded. "Uh... sure. I'll be right back."

A couple minutes later, he came back with a small pile of clothing on his back. "Here. A couple hoodies, T-shirts, jeans, and sweatpants. 

"Here. This is the type of stuff I wear most of the time."

Rarity took the clothing and held them up in her aura to examine. She took notice of the design of one of the hoodies. 

"Galen, what does this symbol mean?"

"Huh? Oh, that's just the Under Armour brand logo. I don't think that they can copyright strike you from another dimension, so feel free to copy it if you actually plan on making me new clothing."

Rarity nodded and began to draw in her sketch book. "Feel free to leave darling. I'm afraid I'll be too engrossed in examining  your clothes to make idle chit-chat."

"Yeah, okay. I was getting bored anyway. Uh, thanks again for doing this Rarity. Like I said, generosity like this isn't really a thing where I'm from. Even if you were friends with a business owner, all they'd do is give you a discount, not free stuff!"

"Think nothing of it darling! Generosity is sort of my thing. Oh. by the way, be sure to stop by my boutique when you first go into town. I need to take your measurements."

Galen blinked. "Right... that. Fuck."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Don't act too excited. It won't take much time at all, I promise."

"It's not the time I'm worried about, more the awkwardness of it all."

Rarity smirked. "Then just for you, I'll be sure to make the experience as awkward as possible."

Galen narrowed his eyes. "I knew there was a catch."

Rarity just laughed as the former human walked out of the room.