The tranquil silence was slowly interrupted by a set of tiny hooves belonging to a young pegasus filly. The dreary, foggy weather was ideal for what they had planned that day. It was so crucial had it not been this way, Scootaloo would have put off her plan until another time.
While walking through the mist, her mind played the desired outcome of events over and over in her head. Rainbow Dash would be showing up in a few minutes, or so she hoped. Once she did, they would be flying through the trees together, just the two of them. She had put a lot of effort into making this possible, and this was something she had dreamed of doing since the first time she laid her eyes on her idol.
Scootaloo came to a stop as she reached her destination. Looking down, not more than an inch in front of her, there was a sheer, steep drop. Beyond that, rows and rows of trees disappeared into the thick hazy wall.
Under normal circumstances, this would have caused Scootaloo to go weak-kneed and feel butterflies in her stomach. But that was the old filly. This one closed her eyes, drew in a slow breath, smelling the damp, mossy air, then let it out. Rainbow was still nowhere to be seen, and for a brief moment, Scootaloo considered waiting a bit longer but knew she would catch up in no time.
Unfurling her wings, she had another moment of hesitation, wondering if this really was the right thing to do. She then recalled what drove her to go to such great lengths, a thought that covered her nerves in yet another layer of ice, more chilly than the surrounding atmosphere. With it came a numbness that has been steadily increasing over the last couple of days.
And with that, she stepped over the cliff's edge.
Scootaloo felt the gravity take hold of her, and in no time, she was zooming through the trees. The wind rushed past her ears and blew through her mane. It was unlike anything she’s ever felt before. Minor tweaks of her wings caused her to maneuver around the trees. At this rate, she could go above them, but where would the fun be in that?
Who’s the chicken now? The filly thought with resentment.
If only she could see her here. What would her expression be? Scootaloo was now picturing a bubblegum pink filly with the look between shock and bitterness staring back at her as she wove around the tree trunks. This’ll show her. I’m not a chicken, and I can too fly!
That entitled brat just loved playing pranks. Like that time, she told Snips and Snails that she’d pay them a bit for every spitball they landed on me and my friends during lunch.
Or that other time she stained the seats at my and my friend’s desk the same color so we wouldn’t notice and when we sat down it stained our fur to ‘give us cutie marks.’
Or that time, she swapped her school lunches with ours. They were so spicy inside that we set off the fire alarm after only one bite. When we were questioned about it, Diamond Tiara said her lunches were being stolen, and she wanted to see who was responsible. Who brings three lunches with them to school!?
That was just the start of a long list of acts that seemed endless. But that’s nothing like the time she had arrived at school to find her desk shoved full of straw with chicken eggs nestled right in the center. The memory of that incident over a week ago was still as vivid as if it was happening that very moment.
Behind her, two fillies began to make clucking noises. Scootaloo didn’t have to turn to know who they were, Diamond Tiara and her lackey Silver Spoon. If the teacher were present, they wouldn’t have had the confidence to go that far vocally. To top it off, the note it came with was an even bigger kick to the ribs. And the very reason why Scootaloo was doing what she was. Just like a chicken, you’ll always be a flightless blank flank.
“Scoots!” A distant voice called out to her, throwing the filly back into the here and now. The mist and rushing wind muffled out most of the raspy voice, but it was definitely unmistakable.
The filly turned around and saw a blotchy shadow just past the fog. They had a mane style she could recognize no matter how much wind or rain beat it around.
“Rainbow! You actually made it!” Scootaloo said, her voice cracking. Then, overjoyed that her setup had yielded the results she desired, her cheeks forcefully tugged her mouth to give a shaky smile.
“Hang on, kid! I’m coming for ya, don’t worry, I’m almost there!”
Still smiling, an egg-sized lump formed in Scootaloo’s throat as she got into her flying position matching that of Rainbow’s form. “Look at me! I’m flying with the fastest flyer in all of Equestria!” Tears welled up in her eyes and streamed across her face as her lifelong dream had finally been achieved. She closed her eyes, sobbing, and pretended that the howling wind was instead a roaring crowd cheering her on.
Rainbow finally came into full view, making her way to Scootaloo with a great sense of urgency. But, just as she made her appearance, so did the ground as it broke the fillies' phantasmal environment appearing like a cliff wall.
“Scootaloo! NO~!!”
“NO~!” Rainbow Dash bolted upright, trembling and drenched in a cold sweat. Tank slowly poked his head out from his shell and gave her a mournful look. “Oh, hey, bud.” She repositioned herself to comfortably look right at Tank. “Sorry about that, for waking you up and all.” In response, the tortoise extended his neck out a little farther and rubbed his cheek up against hers. “Aah, thanks. I needed that.”
Rainbow returned his act of compassion with one of her own. She wrapped her hooves around his warm shell and gave him a firm but comforting hug. She took this precious opportunity to let her mask fall, expressing the feeling that dwelt deep in the empty pit of her gut.
As the shakiness left and her breathing and heart rate became more even, she evaluated her surroundings. She was in her room, of course, she was, that’s where she fell asleep last night. In the corner on a desk was a trophy that she wanted to be unique, so she had put much effort into crafting it herself. Yet, of all the awards she had throughout her home, not one of them was in trophy making.
The base was slanted and made of discarded wood she got for free. To compensate for the crooked appearance, she had made the cup on top a little lopsided. However, that only gave the cup an oblong opening, and in the end, it was an overall nightmarish banana-shaped monstrosity. To her, the pie she made for herself to eat in front of Pinkie Pie looked better than it did. Aside from the looks, all that was left to put on were the words 'Ponyville's Bravest Filly.’
There was no point in going back to sleep. Rainbow Dash was already wide awake. Looking at the clock, it was three twenty-four in the morning, or how she saw it, thirty-seven days, seven hours, and fifty-four minutes since the incident.
Rainbow made her way to the bathroom to take a shower. On her way, she passed by several shelves and plaques displaying first, and second-place awards. She slightly angled her head the other direction to avoid looking at them. Once inside, she ran her tongue over her teeth and felt the buildup of plaque. Maybe she should brush first?
Her shower took longer than she thought it should have been. Once she got out, Rainbow went to the sink, grabbed her toothbrush, put toothpaste on it, and started brushing. Oddly it felt warm and wet like it had just been used. Then she remembered that she had brushed her teeth before hopping into the shower.
After rinsing her brush under the faucet, Rainbow Dash went down the hall to the kitchen. Posters of herself in Wonder Bolt uniform lined the walls alongside newspaper pictures of her receiving awards. Instinctively, her wing rose to block them from view as she passed by.
After pulling out a bowl, she grabbed a box of cereal and poured it in. While adding the milk, she got the sense that she forgot to do something. That was when she felt the minty taste of toothpaste in her mouth losing its flavor from the saliva buildup.
Rainbow briskly trotted to the kitchen sink and spat out the excess toothpaste still contained in her mouth. She was about to stick her head under the faucet to drink, but the sink was so full of dishes it was impossible to do that.
Today. I’ve got to do these stupid dishes today! She told herself that yesterday and the day before, but she was doing it now. She grabbed a washcloth, turned on the hot water, and began washing all the dishes. Halfway through washing, drying, and putting them away, she remembered that her cereal was still untouched on the table… no, it was on the counter.
One look at it, and all she saw left of her morning meal was the warm, sad, limp, soggy mess. Nothing a few raisins couldn’t fix. She found the box of raisins then scratched an itch behind her ear. Her mane still felt wet. When she pulled her hoof away, she saw it covered in suds. She hadn’t rinsed the shampoo out when she was in the shower.
She decided to throw away her breakfast before going to wash the shampoo out. Grabbing the bowl, Rainbow took it to the trash can only to find it overflowing. She would need to get a new trash bag.
Going to the sink, she opened the cabinet doors and grabbed a dry towel, and began drying her mane with it. No! What am I thinking! I need to first get the garbage bags taken care of, then deal with the shampoo. She grabbed a new bag and took out the one in the can. Putting the new one in, she left the full bag where it was and planned to take care of it later.
Back in the bathroom, Rainbow ended up taking yet another cleansing shower. This time she was thoroughly rinsed off. But once again, she had put toothpaste on her brush, ready to brush her teeth for the third time.
Sighing, Rainbow looked up, staring at her reflection as if it held all of life’s answers but kept them from her. She wondered to herself, what is wrong with me? Why can't I keep my focus straight? Through the open door behind her, there was a trophy shelf. Seeing it made her expression harden before throwing her toothbrush at the mirror, smearing toothpaste on the surface.
Back in the kitchen, Rainbow grabbed a bowl to pour cereal into, but it felt sticky. She looked at it and saw one side covered in toothpaste. That’s when she noticed that just over half the dishes had been washed. Of those half, less than half had been dried. Even then, all the dishes were mixed together. The cleaned and dried, cleaned, and dirty dishes were in the sink on the counter and in the cupboards.
She didn’t feel hungry anymore. Looking at the clock, she saw that well over two hours had passed. She was just tired. That had to be it, nothing a little sleep wouldn’t fix. Going back to her room, she knocked over the garbage bag left in the middle of the room. Looking at the spilled contents on the floor, she told herself she’d clean it later.
Eventually, she was back in her room. She took after her pet, who had retreated back into his shell, and got under her covers. She laid there staring at the ceiling, her mentality spiraling into deep thought. That’s when her mind wandered back to when ‘it’ happened.
Scootaloo had asked her to come over to her aunt's house for something important. The filly wouldn’t tell her what it was, but it was clear that she wouldn’t give up asking until Rainbow agreed. Upon arrival, Rainbow had entered the filly’s room and immediately knew something was wrong.
Her walls, usually plastered with Rainbow Dash posters, were cleared off and in their place was a room-sized diagram. There was a sideways drawing on three walls with X’s and O’s peppered throughout the sketch and a trail weaving through them. On the fourth wall were formulas, equations, and timetables. That wasn’t her forté, but a game plan layout told her what the idea was.
On a map, Equestria’s biggest known cliff was circled. Next to the map was a potion recipe titled ‘Insta-Grow.’ It was a standard potion generally used for large events that would last a few days because that was all it was suitable for. However, after a couple of days, the trees would wither and die, mainly because the speed in their growth also caused them to age rapidly.
What drew her attention the most was a crayon drawing of her and Scootaloo flying through the trees. They had happy smiles, except the picture was tilted on its side, or so she thought. After putting it horizontally rather than vertical, it dawned on Rainbow Dash what the plan was. Scootaloo would jump off the cliff and ‘pretend’ to be flying through the trees with her.
Closing her mind to what happened after, Rainbow rolled to her side. She looked at the clock on her bed stand. It was now thirty-seven days, eleven hours, and twenty-three minutes. A golden bronze medal on a decorative red ribbon just under the clock caught her eye. It was given to her by the captain of the Wonder Bolts. It was meant to commemorate her act of valor for saving a filly who had attempted suicide. A filly that was now resting on a hospital bed in a comatose state.
The longer she looked at the ribbon, the redder her vision became. Finally, it was settled. She threw the bedsheets off her body, snatched up the ribbon, and went hunting down the biggest box she could find.
It was a little after seven in the morning when Fluttershy arrived at Rainbow Dash’s house, just in time to see her unload the last box-load of trophies, ribbons, plaques, and pictures. She watched her friend mercilessly throw the box into the pile, then zipped back up to her home. Rainbow returned with what looked like a container of liquid. As she doused the pile, the morning breeze wafted the scent of kerosene into Fluttershy’s nostrils.
Hurling the empty container at the pile, Rainbow Dash darted away, coming back with a stormcloud placing it over the trophies, and bucked it so lightning would strike. All her awards and posters were now ground zero to an erupting ball of flames.
“R-Rainbow! What are you doing!?”
“Fluttershy?! Why are you here this early in the morning?” Rainbow seemed genuinely surprised to see her friend before her.
A look of concern came over Fluttershy’s face, “It’s not that early. It’s only around seven-fifteen or something.”
Thirty-seven days, eleven hours, and forty-five minutes.
“And Luna came to me in my dream saying you were having another nightmare, but you woke up on her before she could contact you. So she asked me to check on you instead.”
This clearly upset her friend when she heard that, “why can’t she just mind her own business?!” Rainbow huffed, plopping herself on the ground, curling into a ball in an upright sitting position, and watched the cracking flames consuming all her past achievements.
“Because it’s her job to,” Fluttershy said calmly, joining the cyan pegasus and sitting next to her. “And because she’s worried about you. But not as much as I am right now.”
“Well, don't. I’m perfectly fine.” Rainbow said, lashing out a bit harsher than she intended to. The sound of grief leaking out of her words told a different story.
With a deadpan expression, Fluttershy looked at Rainbow, the flames and back. “You have toothpaste behind your ear.”
Eyes widening, Rainbow went on the defensive and shot back the first comeback she could think up. “Wha-? No! You have… toothpaste behind your ear!” She then quickly wiped behind both ears vigorously.
“It’s about what happened to Scootaloo, isn’t it.”
Having failed to avoid the topic, Rainbow took this opportunity to rant her pent-up anger to her friend. “Did you see, Diamond Tiara?! She was more upset that her weekly allowance was being revoked than she was about what she did to Scoots.”
Dramatically flailing her arms for theatrics, she continued in a higher pitch voice to try mimicking the filly. “‘What am I getting in trouble for? You’re treating me like I physically pushed her over the edge. She did that to herself. It’s not my fault that she couldn’t handle a harmless prank.’ Does Scootaloo look unharmed to you?!”
“Rainbow, I need you to calm down,” Fluttershy remembered hearing that too. She also remembered having to join Applejack in her efforts to hold Rainbow Dash back from potentially snapping the filly’s neck.
“Calm Down?! You want me to calm down?!” She yelled into Fluttershy's face. Another swift trip to her home, she returned with a baseball bat. Rainbow proceeded to unleash her anger onto the burning pile. “Okay, calming down! See Fluttershy! I’m! Calming! Down! I am the epitome of calm!” Over a minute went by as she continued letting out her frustrations until the bat broke in two. All the while, Fluttershy waited.
Once it was done, Fluttershy couldn’t help noticing the flames reflect off Rainbow’s tear-stained face. Seeing Fluttershy staring at her, Rainbow wiped a hoof across her eyes. “Don’t get the wrong idea. I… uh I just got smoke in my eyes.”
“You and I both know that Diamond Tiara isn’t the reason you're angry right now.”
“What do you know!? If I had just been… I-if it wasn’t for her, then Scootaloo never would have gotten hurt!”
Knowing she wasn’t getting anywhere by talking with her friend, Fluttershy tried to think of the reason plaguing Rainbow’s mind.
She’s destroying her trophies. That seems to be the primary target, but why?
Then it dawned on her. It all made sense now. Rainbow had been the one to catch Scootaloo, saving the filly from death. Even though Rainbow Dash also got hurt in the process, she must’ve felt responsible for not being fast enough.
“What happened to Scootaloo wasn’t your fault.”
Knowing she was onto her, Rainbow lashed out like an injured manticore. “I let her down, Fluttershy! In the worst possible way!” She threw the handle of the bat at her, missing by a few feet.
Fluttershy shrunk back but knew she had her friend cornered, “It wasn’t your fault.”
“Oh, whoop-de-do good for me. It’s not like I deliberately used myself as a cushion to break her fall. I got injured too, you know. The tendons in my right wing still catch every so often when I make a left turn. So I’m also a victim in this!”
“It wasn’t your fault.”
“Will you shut up!” By now, her voice was getting scratchy from all the yelling, “You sound like a broken record! I’ve already been told it’s not… my fault so… so why do you keep…?”
“Because you don’t believe it.”
That was the final nail in her ego’s coffin. Her lower lip trembled as her emotions began flooding out. Defeated, Rainbow’s legs gave out from under her, crumpling to the ground. She felt as weak and exposed as a newborn on a battlefield as her pain finally pushed past the hard lump in her throat. As hard as she tried, the tears refused to stop running down her face. “D-don’t look at me. I’m useless!”
Fluttershy approached her friend, scooped her up and wrapped Rainbow under her wings, letting the waterworks run their course for as long as she needed.
Rainbow Dash slowly embraced the pegasus as if her life depended on it. Submitting herself to Fluttershy’s kindness, she buried her face into her friends’ shoulder. “Why did this happen?”
“She called me the fastest in all of Equestria. How come… I-I was so slow?”
“I could have been there sooner. What did I do wrong?”
Fluttershy stroked Rainbow’s mane gently, providing the much-needed comfort her friend required. In a way, she saw this as repaying her for the many times she supported her after being bullied in flight school.
“It wasn’t your fault.”
It was five minutes later when cyan pegasus gently nudged her friend away. Rainbow’s hot face was wet with tears and snot, not unlike when Fluttershy was in her position. “Feeling better yet?”
Wiping a hoof across her eyes and nose, Rainbow shook her head. “No…” she said with a heavy crack, “But I’m cool with that.” Another wave of sorrow caused her to scrunch her face and shudder.
Putting a hoof on her friend’s shoulder Fluttershy continued to offer her support. “Well, I’m not. What else can I do for you?”
Opening her mouth to deny any more help, Rainbow’s stomach growled in retaliation against her act of defiance. That caused her to close her mouth and turn her focus aside.
“Do you want me to make you breakfast?”
Rainbow only nodded. “Although, all the dishes need to be washed, there's garbage everywhere and…”
Fluttershy stopped her by putting her hoofs on Rainbow’s cheeks. “I’ll cook you some food and do the cleaning. Maybe later today we can pay Scootaloo a visit, just promise you’ll talk yourself into going into her room. She’s doing well, you deserve to know that.”
Weighing the offer for a moment, Rainbow responded. “I’ll think about it… on the way there. I’ll go, but it won’t be easy. but first…” she sniffed her fur, smelling the strong scent of smoke. “I think I need another shower again.”