//------------------------------//
// 55: Back 
// Story: One Way 
// by jroddie 
//------------------------------//

Chapter 55


I couldn’t believe it was happening. I was walking back to the Doctor, still lounging in the tub, wearing a heavy jacket. They said that it was the only way to get back. They said that it couldn’t possibly go wrong, and they were there to help me if it did. Finder did pretty much all of the talking, but the Composer was there to add validity through his argument. I shook my head, trying to bring myself back to reality. The straps were chafing me a little bit, which kept me rubbing my shoulders with every step. I could feel the cool metal near my wrist, which was a constant reminder of my promise. There’s no backing out from this point on, Finder said. It’s now or never. If you botch this, you’re stuck on this world. We can help you if you need it, but we can only do so much.  He warned, showing me the equipment I would need. I gulped, walking even closer to the Doctor. He was aimlessly looking up at the glistening gems, steeping in the hot tub with his daiquiri still in hand. I gulped as I took the final few steps up to him. He looked up at me with a slightly repentant frown.
“Edwin, I’m sorry about earlier. I said some things that I certainly regret, and I hope we can pu-“ The Doctor never finished. I ripped off my jacket leaving parts of my rich brown skin to the open air. I grasped the tool with my right hand and braced it with my left, keeping it stable and pointed at the Doctor. I could feel the pack I was wearing tighten and mold to my body, making me feel itchy. It booted up and began to elicit a sharp metallic whirr. Cool air circulated through the shoulder straps, keeping the machine from burning me where it touched my body. There was a cold pinch on the side of my neck, and suddenly information appeared over my regular vision, showing temperatures and statistics throughout the system in my field of view. 
“This is a hijacking. Give me every tardis key you have on your person and your screwdriver.” I tried to say as evenly as I could. The Doctor’s previous expression was replaced by a blank mask of shock as he paled a few shades. He shifted his weight forward and stood up in the middle of the tub. He dropped his drink into the water.
“Do you know what you’re pointing at me?”
“B-x4 adaptive assault system, manufactured by the Walters Corporation on Kobaal Five. It costs five million Federation Credits to fire it one time. I’ll only need to fire it once. They say Hector of Arturus used one to irradiate an entire planet.” I rattled off.
“Did he?”
“No. It was only a continent.”
“If you shoot that, you’ll kill every single person in here.” He explained softly. I adjusted the gun.
“I’m a desperate man, Doctor.”
“You can’t have the Tardis.”
“You won’t survive.” I stated. The Doctor smiled.
“Don’t make the mistake of doubting me. Thousands far more motivated than you and much better equipped have tried to take it away from me.”
“They might have had better weapons than me, but you bet your ass they weren’t more motivated than I am. I am going to walk out of this lobby with a key and a screwdriver even if it kills me.” I promised. I could feel the suit start to rev faster, expending extra energy so it didn’t combust or create unshielded nuclear fusion on my back. I rolled my shoulders.
“You won’t get far. You might not get anywhere.” The Doctor told me. 
“I know all of the emergency programs and how to circumvent them. I know where to go where future versions of you cannot find me. I’ve entered the streams. I’ve felt the Threads themselves. You can’t stop me. Nothing can now.”
“I was going to help you get to Equestria!” He shouted at me, flinging his hands up in anger. I took a step towards the Doctor. He flinched a little bit when I brandished the weapon.
“You were?! Doctor, unless you hand me your keys and your screwdriver right now, you’re going to be scooping molecules of yourself up off of a moon three systems away!” I shouted back, baring my teeth at the end. The Doctor looked past me with a triumphant smile. 
“That’s him! He’s the man!” The Doctor shouted. I looked behind me to see a small squad of armored Judoon. One of them near the head of the group pointed at me and started running. It was hard to understand how fast a bipedal rhino could run until you’ve seen one do it. I swore under my breath and spun to face them. I felt the gun whirr and click, pulling information into my vision which told me that the Judoon approaching were very heavy and wanted to hurt me. I pulled back on the trigger with a solid click. 
There was a moment of panic when nothing happened. When I thought I was going to get stomped to death. When I would never see Luna again. That moment made her flawless image appear in my mind, with her shining blue hair and her brilliant teal eyes. It flooded me with determination and courage that told me I would not die on this soulless rock. The Pack must have anticipated me and collapsed the enormous cannon into itself and slid two metal plates down the ends of my arms. These plates folded towards me when they reached the end of my arms, molding to my fists. The first Judoon was rapidly approaching. I didn’t hesitate to take the steps to meet it. I wheeled an arm back and swung it forward quickly, catching the alien under the ribs, knocking him off of his feet and launching him a few meters backwards. The other five Judoon didn’t stop running or even hesitate. I leaped into the air and cracked a helmet open with my fists. The next few fell in short order, with what would be fatal wounds if they were humans. But with the Judoon, I just wasn’t sure. I ended up standing in the middle of a bunch of moaning bodies, smeared and splattered with bright yellow blood. I looked up at the Doctor, who was staring at me with his mouth open. I walked back to him, hearing the mechanical whirrs and hisses of the system that helped me walk with the heavy pack on. By this time, it was actually adding metal plates to my body as armor. The Doctor leaped out of the pool and made a dash for a hallway. I tensed my muscles and ran after him, the suit elongating my strides. I was leaping more than running when I collided with a sapphire wall, crumbling off gems bigger than my hands. I tumbled down to the ground, sprawling myself out of the cool blue floor. I watched the Doctor take the final few steps to the Tardis. He paused before he pushed the doors open. 
“You have made a powerful enemy today, Edwin. You will never be safe. Wherever you hide, whenever you go, you can never be safe from me. I promise you will never again know a moment of peace. On my honor as a Time Lord, I declare you a mortal enemy of my race.” He vowed.  He pushed open the doors and walked in. They shut behind him with a sharp clack, and my heart plunged in my chest. I opened my mouth in complete shock. This was it. It was over. I would have to spend the rest of my life on a huge gemstone.  I reached for the Tardis as if it would do anything. The plating and the mechanical pieces on the right side of my body clacked and whirred and moved around. I felt a cool wormy thing snake up my arm. A metal hand sprouted on the end of my arm, flexing its fingers. It launched itself out at the Tardis, leaving a thick metal cable behind it. The metal fingers clamped down on a corner of the box. I didn’t have time to think before the cable took up slack and pulled me to the Tardis. I was flung through the air and collided with a clang. I looked around and found myself hugging the Tardis. I looked up at the blue ceiling. It slowly faded from view, showing a chaotic red tunnel. It faded back to blue, then back to red. Blue, red, blue, red. The Tardis, with absolutely no warning at all, lurched forward at an alarming speed. The cables holding me to the door let me out a few feet, separating me from the machine. I could see where I was. The Tardis was moving through time and space, and this was the inside of a Slice. I tried to breathe, but nothing came out. I could feel the spit boiling on my tongue and my vision fading at the edges. Before I could ask the suit to seal me up, a mask slapped down on my face and I could hear the hiss of fresh, cool air. It was technically a synthetic blend that didn’t originate anywhere near a gravity well, but my lungs couldn’t tell the difference. The chaos only a few inches away from me was vicerally palpable. I could almost taste the disorder in the hard vacuum as countless events and times flashed past. I couldn’t bear to look. My time in the Slice lasted forever, yet the moment was fleeting. We finally ended up in a small glade, my body crashing into the Tardis and then onto the ground. My eyes focused and my surroundings resolved into objects. A sun was shining brightly in the sky, but I couldn’t feel the warmth through the suit. The mask I was wearing targeted the star I was looking at. 

Class G2 y. Dwarf
152m.km.
Sol

My mind connected the dots. Earth, the peak of summer. I looked to my right. There was a small wood, littered with dandelions and clover. I got to my feet, feeling the springy grass beneath my soles, which were left bare. Apparently they didn’t need protection in a vacuum, at least didn’t for how long I was in one. The mask wasn’t coming off yet because the pack was still deciding if the air was safe to breathe. Various animals were tagged by the mask, telling me how dangerous they were. A few squirrels darted out of the trees to look at me, but that was about it. Nothing really happened. I heard a creak behind me. I turned to the noise immediately, flushing with success when I saw the Doctor peeking his head out of the twin doors. The pleasure I felt when he opened his mouth in horror was so amazingly satisfying. I pointed at him, but didn’t even recognize the outstretched arm because it was so heavily armored.
“Your keys and your screwdriver. Now.” I commanded. The Doctor, about as quick as could be, ducked back into the Tardis and tried to close the doors. I called up another metal hand and shot it at him. It didn’t reach him, but it managed to get through the doors. A camera mounted somewhere on the hand popped up in the corner of my vision, showing me a grainy view of the Tardis interior. The Doctor was running around the console, trying to get away from me. I wiggled a few fingers and the mechanical hand leaped to the Console. I closed my eyes and concentrated, trying to focus my efforts on what I was about to do. Revoking the Deadlock in the Tardis was complicated. The hand danced across the wedge, trying to remove the lock. The Doctor was definitely trying to stop it, but he wasn’t doing much against the appendage. I couldn’t tell whether it was done on the Console, but the big doors swung open. I grinned and launched myself into the Tardis. The Doctor, still wearing his trunks and lei, went absolutely crazy. He ran to the opposite side of the console and mashed buttons like mad. He actually managed to transport using only the one side. He slammed a palm down on the console and I heard a horrifyingly familiar click. The Doctor panicked. The lights all turned red and the familiar Klaxon sounded. He grinned and crossed his arms over his chest. He flew backwards towards the wall and landed squarely in an inertia chamber. It sealed shut over him as he waved at me. I jumped again, leaping off of the ceiling and flying to his pod. I thumped down on his chamber and started pounding it with my fists. The glass was resilient and didn’t crack. The Doctor mouthed something and flew down out of his tube. I grimaced and pounded on the glass, trying to get at him. It took me a few minutes to realize that I didn’t need to anymore. He was gone, and I had the Tardis. It took me even longer to calm down enough to act on that fact. 

I was facing the vast emptiness of space. The pack was still on my back, happily revving to keep from exploding. The pastrami and rye in my hand was slightly dry but still delicious. I watched the twinkling universe and bit down on the sandwich. The Tardis was sad, and I knew it. It wasn’t responding to my vocal cues so I had to use the console directly. Thoughts flew through my head. Does violence define me as a person? Am I ever going to be a pony again? Does my sandwich need more or less spicy mustard? These pressing issues bombarded my mind as I waited. The first sandwich disappeared, followed by the second, and then the third. I saw a heart-shaped asteroid float past, millions of miles away from just about anything. I picked up a remote controller that was strategically placed between the pastrami and the mayo. It looked like a flat rectangle completely loaded with wires and switches and knobs. I flicked a series of toggles and buttons, activating a tractor field around the Tardis. The asteroid floated towards me slowly. It bumped up to one side and settled where I couldn’t see it. I pulled my mask down and pushed myself out into space. I clung to the surface of the Tardis and pulled myself along till I got to the rock. It wasn’t so big, but it was still bigger than the Tardis. I pushed myself around the surface of the rock until I found a tiny little crater. I knocked just to the left of the crater twice. A circle appeared on the surface of the asteroid, which swung open. Finder’s bright face appeared, covered by a spacesuit visor. He floated out of the Asteroid and out into space with me. The hatch closed and sealed shut, leaving no trace of its presence. Finder gestured to my Tardis, and I nodded. I got a hold of a handle on his back and pulled him to my door. I tossed him in first, following soon after. Finder was twisting off his helmet when I got my mask off. His grey mane poured out of his suit when he got it off. I frowned and checked on the Console. 
“You know what to do now.” Finder said, unlocking the cuffs on his boots. I nodded silently, starting the sequence to prepare the Tardis for dimension hopping. I trailed off in my tapping and turned slowly to Finder. He was magicking his spacesuit into a nice folded square. He sighed happily and turned to me.
“There’s going to be a pit stop.” I told Finder. He frowned.
“What do you mean?”
“We’re not going straight to Equestria. I need to pick something up.” I explained. Finder shook his head.
“No. We’re going to do this by the book. No detours, no stops. Straight to Equestria.” He spouted. I looked him right in the eyes.
“I’m not asking you, Finder. I’m telling you what is going to happen.”
“That’s not how things work, Edwin. This is going to happen the way the Composer wants it to happen or it won’t happen at all.” Finder argued. I turned back to the Console and put in the proper coordinates. Finder saw them and sighed.
“This isn’t going to work.” He muttered to himself and hopped up on the Console. He was reaching for a monitor when I pointed a revolver at him.
“Step away, Finder.” I commanded coldly. Finder stared at me with wide-open eyes.
“That’s a gun.”
“Do they have guns in Equerstria when you’re from?”
“No.”
“You know what they do?”
“I’ve heard about them.”
“Then you’ll kindly walk away from my Console before I show you first hand. I’ve made a promise that I’m going to keep.” I threatened coolly. Finder gulped, but he didn’t move at all. I pulled the hammer back, letting out a sharp clack. “Make your peace with Celestia or get off my Console.” I ordered. Finder hopped off of the Console and backed away, shaking slightly as he did so. I turned back to the controls and put in the last few equations. A lever swung forward and the Tardis started to move. I stared up at the pillar and sighed. I nearly fell asleep to the thrum when a great lurch brought me back from drowsiness. I got up and stretched, thinking about what I would say. I walked past Finder without a word, scooping up a stray sonic screwdriver from a pile of linens. I pulled the doors open and looked. I was in front of a big white condo, with a nice black BMW in the driveway and a nice rosebush in the garden. I was waiting not even a minute when a man walked out of the front door. He was holding a leather briefcase and a wad of white fabric in another. He locked the door behind him and he turned around. He dropped his briefcase and his wad down right then. He didn’t move, and he didn’t speak. I smiled.
“Come on, Othello. We’re going home.”