//------------------------------// // Brothers and Chaos (Lord Tirek) // Story: Potty Training Tales // by SuperPinkBrony12 //------------------------------// Tirek grumbled and tried his best not to look like he was upset or jealous (even though he was). Yet again, his younger brother Scorpan was proudly showing off and being showered with praise. This was because he was in “potty training”. Granted, Tirek was too, but he was nowhere near as close or as far as long as Scorpan was. Scorpan had gotten to the point where he didn’t need to wear these things called “pull-ups” while Tirek was still in diapers. It’s not like Tirek made no effort at all to try and master “potty training”. He really did want to make his parents proud, particularly his father who it seemed he couldn’t impress no matter what he tried. But for the young centaur and potential heir to the throne, the training often meant spending a lot of time in a cold, dark and lonely part of the castle with only a strange thing called a chamber pot for company. Simply using it was a hassle, to say nothing of the fact that it required a servant to be around afterward to empty it out. All of that seemed like a lot of effort to the little one, not helped by the fact that he couldn’t really focus on “the magics” that flowed through his body that were supposed to tell him when he had to go. Often, when he thought he had to go he really didn’t, and when he didn’t think he had to go he often did. And everytime he failed, his father would scold him severely and punish him by sending him to his room.  “You’re getting too old to still be having accidents, Tirek.” King Vorak always lectured even though his wife felt he was being too hard on their oldest son. He was simply using the methods he recalled working for him when he was Tirek’s age. He couldn’t understand why they didn’t seem to be working. So it was that the king grew increasingly frustrated with his eldest son, and soon turned his attention towards one that seemed more receptive of his lessons: Scorpan. “Why can’t you be more like Scorpan, Tirek?” King Vorak was always heard to say. “He has no trouble with potty time, unlike you.” “I’m trying, Father!” Tirek always whined in protest. “It’s not my fault if my body doesn’t want to cooperate and keeps picking inopportune times to make me go.” “At this rate, you’ll never graduate from diapers! You’ll be a mockery and an embarrassment of the entire kingdom,” King Vorak eventually declared. “I’ve grown tired of having to clean up after your accidents, and so have the hired help. At this rate, I don’t know who else to turn or what else to consider to get you to be more like your brother.” Scorpan insisted. “It’s really not that hard once you get the hang of it, Tirek. I can teach you.” But the young centaur only snorted. “I don’t need help from the favorite son, Scorpan. Ever since you were born you’ve gotten everything you ever wanted!” “That’s not true!” Scorpan protested, but his older brother was in such a state of mind that such insistence didn’t matter. “Hey, King Vorak!” Discord greeted one day, arriving as usual for his court summons. “Always good to see you again, old pal. It’s nice to get away from Equestria every now and then, especially when those ponies keep trying to ruin my fun by rising up against me. I’m growing bored of their constant rebelling and complaining. You’re so lucky not to have to put up with that.” King Vorak only sighed, distracted by other things. “Whatever.” He replied in an unconcerned tone of voice. The chaos maker quickly took notice of Vorak’s attitude and couldn’t help but chime in. “Oh, what’s the matter, buddy? What’s got you all down in the dumps? Come on, let’s put a smile on that face!” He opted to briefly paint a smile on the king’s face, only for it to fade quite quickly. King Vorak reluctantly decided to explain. “If you must know, Discord, it’s my oldest son. Tirek continues to baffle me with the amount of difficulty and resistance he displays towards just about everything. I only wish he were more well behaved like his younger brother is.” “Oh, has he still been having trouble with that ‘potty training’ stuff?” The witty spirit inquired. “Back in Equestria, from what I understand, most little ones his age are supposed to have mastered it.” “It would seem Tirek is intent on being either a late bloomer or a rebel in that regard,” The king grumbled as he folded his arms across his chest. “I’m just about ready to give up on training him all together.” But Discord had another idea as a lightbulb literally went off above his head. “Or, why don’t you let me take a crack at getting the little tyke at least motivated to do a better job? I’m not what you’d call an expert, but I have picked up a thing or two from the ponies just from spying on them.” “By all means then, knock yourself out,” King Vorak quickly agreed. “Just don’t come whining to me if it doesn’t work out.” “Splendid!” Discord proudly declared! “You won’t regret this, Vorak. I promise.” Walking away, the old centaur could only mutter to himself. “I sincerely hope not.” Discord made good use of his newfound freedom to quickly “begin” the training. He popped into Tirek’s room unannounced and teleported both himself and the little centaur into the room where the chamber pots were usually kept (and emptied out). Tirek was, needless to say, anything but pleased. “Why do I have to come here?” He grumbled, looking up at the strange creature that had brought him here. “Now now,” Discord lightly scolded while wagging a finger on his paw. “Is that any way to talk to or treat your Uncle Discord? The same Uncle Discord who happily serves on your father’s court at his behest, I might add?” The little centaur only grumbled. “Let me guess, you gonna try to make me potty train.” Discord nodded. “You are correct, Tirek! But fear not, for luck is on your side,” He then explained. “I know you probably don’t care much for those old fashioned chamber pots. But what if I told you, there was a better method out there? Something far more suitable to one your age?” Tirek looked up at the strange creature, intrigued ever so slightly. “What is it?” He asked. The chaos maker just replied. “Instead of telling you, why don’t I show you?!” He promptly snapped his talons, teleporting in a strange (and foreign to Tirek) object! Tirek took one look at the new object, and gulped hard. It was way bigger than any chamber pot he’d ever seen. It was an almost otherworldly white in color, looking like someone had fused a bowl with a chair. It had some kind of seat and lid, and off to its right side rested some kind of silver colored object that looked like it was to be pushed down. “What is that thing?” The young centaur asked. “It looks like a chamber pot, but not an actual pot.” “That’s because it’s not a pot. This is the big potty,” Discord explained. “It’s actually still in development, but some ponies are trying to use it. It actually works like a chamber pot, except it can empty itself!” “Really?” Tirek blinked as the lord of chaos went over to the object. Discord nodded. “To do that, you just pull the handle down like this!” He grabbed the mentioned object and pressed it down. Immediately, Tirek became stricken with fright from the sudden loud noise and ran and hid behind Discord! “Monster!” He screamed once the noise faded away! “What?” Discord  in disbelief, before realizing his mistake. “Oopsie doopsie, silly old me. That’s far too advanced for someone your age. Now, maybe for your brother who seems to have no trouble with chamber pots, it might be just up his alley.  But I think we’ll try something a bit more ‘child friendly’.”  Tirek blinked in confusion as the lord of chaos promptly snapped his talons and made the huge object disappear, replacing it with a smaller, plastic bowl of some kind. “This is a training potty,” Discord told the young centaur. “And seeing as you're training yourself, it only seems natural to let you have it,” He then gently nudged the young centaur towards it. “Go ahead, give it a try. I won’t let anything bad happen to you. I very well can’t have your father blaming me for anything.” And so, reluctantly, Tirek waddled over to the training potty. He remembered from what training he had undergone prior to this point that he had to take off his diaper before using it. That was a task made easier by Discord’s magic more or less doing it for him. Sitting down on the potty was strangely more comfortable than sitting on a chamber pot. The plastic felt so soft and so warm. “Attaboy, Tirek!” Discord suddenly cheered! “See how easy it can be when you have the right stuff?” To his surprise, the young centaur found that he’d already gone and tinkled without really noticing it. It had happened so fast! And yet, in all his years he’d never felt as proud as he did now! For the first time since he couldn’t remember when, he’d actually gone to the bathroom like he was supposed to when he was supposed to! And to think, all it had taken was someone other than his father or his brother. Boy would they be surprised!