//------------------------------// // 2. why do you compromise? // Story: Two Burning Stars Chasing The Day // by FoolAmongTheStars //------------------------------// School had never been easy for Starlight—and she never held hope that it would get better any time soon. Kids found their friends and stuck together like herds of scared sheep. Teachers couldn’t care less about you or were stricter the moment you stepped out of line. The only thing that changed was the amount of homework that each teacher dished out, so much that it took over weeknights and weekends, making it impossible to balance a healthy social life and good grades at the same time. Not that that had ever been a problem for her. She didn’t have a reputation to worry about. She couldn’t care less about what her teachers thought of her, making the feelings mutual in that regard. She didn’t mind doing her homework for as long as she had to, even if it took all night. It gave her the excuse to hide away from the drunk in the living room. Starlight was strong, she knew this, but that man was stronger. Starlight just counted down the days until her birthday. She couldn’t wait for the day to come, but she also dreaded it. The freedom of finally being of age also meant the possibility of saying goodbye to Sunburst. For good. “You look more morose than usual,” Sunburst pointed out dryly, leaning against the brick wall of the building just outside the main entrance. The first bell had gone off, the second one yet to ring. They shared first period—the only class they had together—and Sunburst always waited for her, ever since the tenth grade when she finally let him consider them to be more than just friendly acquaintances. “What else is new?” she replied, sarcastic as usual, but she plastered a grin to appease him. “Why are you so chipper this morning?” Sunburst shrugged. “I don’t know, maybe I just realized how awesome I truly am.” She nodded with slight resignation. It was going to be one of those days. “What made you so delusional?” “You got the job.” Sunburst couldn’t help but beam, hands automatically grabbing her forearms and squeezing gently. He knew that Starlight had an aversion to being touched. He also knew that she was very much touch starved as well, but she had to be the one to initiate it, so he never made a big deal out of it when she would casually lean on him or sit a little too close. It was just Starlight being…well, Starlight. “You talked to Fluttershy already?” She sounded shocked, her eyebrows lowering into a slight frown. “I thought you were going to wait for the right moment.” He let her go with a shrug, hefting his bag on his shoulder some more and walking into the school towards their Media class. He nodded politely to the teacher as he and Starlight made their way to their seats all the way in the back, they sat there because she had a phobia of sitting in the front row and the teacher didn’t care where you were seated as long as you were quiet. “I figured that it was better to get started as soon as possible, to finish those hundred hours before finals and stuff…but only if you want to,” he added quickly, not wanting to sound too controlling. “It’s just an option, it’s up to you.” He couldn’t figure out what her expression meant, the utter blankness and stillness of it, but he knew Starlight, and more often than not she needed time to process her emotions before expressing them. When the girl finally came back to herself, finally got a grasp, a small smile toyed at her lips. “You’re amazing.” And Sunburst felt like he was melting into a puddle. Her blue eyes were trained on him, happy and open and so vulnerable that it was almost painful to witness. The smile was more restrained than usual, but it was probably because she wanted to actually smile. And he was happy because she was happy. …He honestly needed to get a better grip on himself. Starlight looked away; gaze trained on the blackboard where the teacher was writing something down. The final bell went off and the last of the students walked in. Notebooks and pens were pulled out, phones were hidden in laps, and everyone settled into their seats without incident. The teacher turned around, giving a plain smile before starting her lecture. “So…what the hell should I do?” Starlight whispered. It just dawned on her that she had a chance. Sunburst had made it possible, had gone through all that trouble for her, and she didn’t want to screw it up. She probably would, but she would try her best not to. Every day was a struggle against the metaphorical anchor tied around her waist. “What do I say? When do I come in? What will I be doing?” Sunburst shrugged, smiling a little. “You can come with me today if you like,” he whispered back. He looked at the teacher, acting like the goody-two-shoes that she knew he was. “Today is a four-hour shift, so I can introduce you.” She nodded, their eyes meeting briefly before he turned towards the lesson at hand. She pouted a little but followed suit, only because she needed to pass this course and get a move on with her life as soon as possible. Whether Sunburst would be in the picture or not…remained to be seen. She wanted him there, of course, more than anything. But the thing about Sunburst was that he was too good. He let people take advantage of him. He let others walk all over him, he put his feelings second for the sake of others. It was something she loved and hated about him. She knew that if she asked, he would follow her anywhere, she wanted to tell him to come with her, and at the same time, she didn’t. It sounded nice in theory, the two of them against the world, but the world was big and cruel, what chances would they really have? All the things holding her back wouldn’t magically disappear the day she turned eighteen, and she would hate herself forever if she dragged him down any further than she already had. Sunburst never complained, never uttered a word of disdain towards their friendship, when he set his mind on something he would see to it to the end. Which was why, on the day of her sentencing, she had waited for hours for him to pick her up, because he had promised, and Sunburst never went back on his promises. It had been pouring rain all day, buckets and buckets of it falling from the sky, which didn’t lessen as the sun disappeared behind the buildings, as the streetlights flickered on one by one, but she waited because he had promised. Starlight had thought that she would be used to it, the bitter taste of disappointment, as she walked for two hours in the storm to get back to her foster home. Her foster mother had scolded her for wetting the carpet with her soaked shoes. Her foster father decided that a scolding was not enough punishment. She flipped the page of her notebook and took some more notes. It didn’t matter now, it was water under the bridge, Sunburst would have been there if he could have; if only his mother hadn’t stopped him, she knew that now. She didn’t blame him, she didn’t even hate Stellar for what she did, in fact, she envied him. At least he had an adult looking out for him. They say that the mind of a woman was a mystery, and no one encapsulated that more than Starlight—to him, at least. More often than not she’d be completely out of it, lost in some thought that seemed to haunt her. Which was why, for the rest of the day, he tried to cheer her up, hoping to distract her from what was bothering her. Some days it didn’t work, and those were the days that Starlight usually got into trouble. Even after two years, Starlight was still the new kid, the odd one out, the fact that she was different made her a prime target for the school bullies, making her life difficult if not impossible at every turn. Sunburst hated it, hated the stupid hierarchy that high school created. It was a waste of time, a pathetic excuse to fight for a title that wouldn’t last. He didn’t care if he was resting somewhere in the middle—he would throw it away in a heartbeat. He found Starlight sitting on their usual spot, waiting for him now that school was over. As he got closer, he noticed that she was applying makeup to her face, trying to cover up the bruise growing on the right side of her jaw. Sunburst couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped his lips. “What happened?” He flinched the moment he uttered the question, only because the answer would always be the same anytime he asked. It would either be a shrug, an exasperated sigh, a roll of her eyes, or—if her day had been especially bad—she would just stand up and leave without a word. It was why when she didn’t move, Sunburst got more worried. “Bullshit,” Starlight muttered darkly under her breath. The intensity of her glare left him frozen, even if it wasn’t pointed directly at him, but at some invisible point from across the field. He hated that she had to deal with this, he hated that the school always turned a blind eye towards her, and he hated himself for not being able to help her. “Just everyday bullshit.” Sunburst reached out to her, closing the space between them with a few more steps, and place his hand on her shoulder. “Explain it to me,” he murmured, taking a seat next to her. Starlight shifted on the bench, lips forming a thin line and pointedly avoiding his eyes. Sunburst wished she would look up; wish he could do something to erase the sadness on her face. He didn’t know everything—Starlight made sure of that—but he knew enough to put some pieces together to get a picture of what her life was like when he wasn’t around. Her foster father was unpleasant to be around, and he heard rumors that he was an alcoholic, which probably made it worse. And on top of it, she had to deal with the school bullies and an uncaring town. He wanted nothing more than to save her, but… But he was just one boy, what could he really do? Sometimes the urge to blurt out everything was overwhelming, especially when Sunburst was always there, so eager to take on her burden and ready to listen. It was a struggle to remind herself to keep her mouth shut, to walk slower in the halls, and take her time in class to avoid him a little longer. She loved Sunburst, couldn’t get him out of her mind, she loved him enough to protect him from the ugliness that surrounded her. And the ugliest part was her foster home. Some days weren’t so bad, her foster mother was nice enough and would get her anything she wanted, be it clothes or books, or just straight up give her as much money as she needed. Her foster father, when sober, was sullen and quiet until he found the bottle, in which case the woman would flee and leave Starlight to take the brunt of his anger. Sometimes she thought that the reason they took her in was to have someone to push around, and the money and the gifts were her foster mother’s way of thanking her. And school? Well, school was the cherry on the top of her pile of problems. Everyone distrusted her on principal—she was the bad girl, the problem child—to associate with her was akin to social suicide. And she had been perfectly fine with this until the fighting started. Kids were cruel, Starlight knew this, they would pick on her so they wouldn’t turn into a target, she understood it with every fiber of her being, but she never fought back. Don’t get her wrong, she could fight, she knew where to hit and where it hurt the most, how to fight dirty and really make those pansies suffer and Lord knew how much she wanted to do that. But she didn’t for one simple reason: Sunburst. As long as she didn’t make a big scene, the school wouldn’t call her foster house. No calls home meant less tension, less attention from authorities, and fewer possibilities of someone snooping around and finding out about her situation, which meant she could stay a little longer in her terrible home in this crappy town with its horrid residents. But it’s the town that Sunburst lived in, and that was all the reason she needed to stay. She just couldn’t bring herself to leave him. She swore that the moment she turned eighteen and got her diploma, she would take all the money she had and buy a house that was furthest away from here as possible. She couldn’t ask Sunburst to come with her…but maybe she could follow him instead? He would surely leave to some prestigious university, and with his smarts, he could easily get a full scholarship and with the money she had saved… “You don’t have to tell me,” Sunburst murmured beside her, interrupting her fantasies and bringing her back to reality. She didn’t like reality too much, if at all. “I’m here for you if you need me.” Sunburst was always there. That was the problem. But it was also the solution. Starlight stood up from the bench and held out her hand towards him. “Didn’t you promise that you would introduce me?” “I did,” Sunburst agreed, giving her a small but worried smile. Starlight would have done anything to wipe it off his face, to make him see that she wasn’t a delicate rose that needed to be saved. If anything, she was more like a weed that survived out of spite for the world and the warmth of his smiles. Sunburst had to go back home to get the car before they could head out. Starlight waited for him a block down, despite his insistence that she didn’t have to. She gave him a pointed look and Sunburst understood why. He closed his eyes and sighed, taking a moment to compose himself before he turned the knob on the door and entered the house. “Mom, I’m grabbing the car keys, I’ll be home by seven!” “Have a good day!” His mom called from the other room, most likely the living room. Sunburst hesitated, staring at the car keys in his hand as he stood by the door. Hey, guess what? Starlight is helping out at the shelter from now on and I’m giving her a ride today! See you later! It was what he wanted to say, but the fear of repercussion kept his mouth shut. His mother was a kind woman, she just…didn’t understand Starlight. She had a reputation—a bad one—even though Sunburst could see past it and appreciate the real her, no one else bothered to do so. If he told his mom…, would she let him continue volunteering at the shelter? Would it send her into hysterics, and start a fight? Could he stand his mother’s look of disappointment for being friends with a girl like her? What about all the questioning, the distrust that would follow? She probably wouldn’t let him out of her sight again, thinking the worse, questioning every little thing he did, was he smoking? Drinking? Had his grades been failing? Was all of that worth it? …It should be. But in Sunburst’s mind, the door was already beginning to close. Now wasn’t the time to come clean to his mother. One day he would. But today he’d just get in the car and drive away like nothing was amiss. Starlight was leaning against the bus stop when he pulled up, the distant expression still on her face. Today, his mission was to get rid of it, at least for what was left of the day. She got in and they drove away, heading for the edge of town, where the houses were few and far in between and the trees took up more space than the buildings. “How’s your jaw?” Sunburst asked, sparing a glance in her direction before looking back to the road. Her bruise was on the other side of her face, where he couldn’t see, but Starlight had done a good job with her makeup and she didn’t look any different. She pulled down the car mirror and inspected her face. “I think it’s fine, it’s not swelling at least.” “Does it hurt?” “No.” Sunburst knew it was a lie, not that it mattered, the fact that he could tell was enough. “There are some aspirins in the glove compartment,” he said instead. He had no water to offer her, but she swallowed the pills dry with little trouble. A comfortable silence filled the cabin. Sunburst tapped the steering wheel to a nonsensical tune as he drove while Starlight leaned back against the passenger seat with her eyes close. She always looked so tired, no matter how many times she said that she slept enough at home. It made him wonder what else was she hiding from him. Then again, it was Starlight. She didn’t lie to be mean, she did it because she thought she was protecting those around her by doing so. Sunburst didn’t like it, it made him feel like she didn’t trust him even after all this time. “Does Fluttershy know I’m coming?” “Yeah, I told her.” They came to a stoplight and Sunburst grinned, nudging her on the shoulder. “She’s going to put you to work, so be warned.” “I figured that was the point,” she said with a grin, cracking one blue eye open to stare at him. “She must need the muscle since you are as strong as a beanpole.” She was joking, but it poked at his earlier insecurity, so he hid his grimace behind a smile. “Hey, are you suggesting that I’m weak?” “I’m sorry Iron Man, might want to add more oil to that tin can of yours,” Starlight giggled, relaxing against the car seat as she stared at the road ahead of them. “…but, really, you saved my butt once again, so…thank you.” For what? He wanted to ask, so badly that it hurt. For the job? For always being there? For making you smile? Not that he would get the answers he was looking for, with Starlight being so tightlipped about everything and anything. He would just have to wear her down so she would open up to him eventually. Sunburst had to believe that he could do that, otherwise, he would drive himself crazy with his powerlessness. He slowed down and pulled into the parking lot of a brick building just on the right side of the road, a colorful sign—that seriously needed a new paint job—bolstered the words Animal Shelter to the world. Starlight stared at it as she let out a heavy sigh. “We’re here.” “We’re here,” Sunburst echoed, but neither of them moved to leave the car. They turned to look at each other instead, her blue eyes were smoldering, drawing him in and he had to wonder if maybe—just maybe—she felt the same way he did. “Are you ready?” She blinked and nodded, looking away as she opened the door and stepped out into the humid summer day.