//------------------------------// // Ch. 10 :: In Which Rainbow Dash is Bored Out of Her Feeble Mind // Story: Rainbow Dash is Best Pony // by Tirimsil //------------------------------// On a hill overlooking Ponyville, a sweet yellow pegasus sat content in the sun, smiling with each cool breeze ruffling her sakura-pink hair, her eyes closed, her ears swiveling to follow the birdsong that danced through the trees. "Ooooh," she praised, "The wheat-thresher robins are especially beautiful this year! Aren't they, Rainbow Dash?" She turned to her right and opened her eyes. "... Huh?" she blinked, seeing no one there. "... Rainbow Dash?" She turned back to her left. She frowned, got up, and turned again, now finding Rainbow Dash sitting next to her. "Eeep!" she squeaked, and leapt into the air. "Aw, yeah, it's great," Rainbow Dash returned, nodding with a big fake smile. "That thing, that uh, you said, it's awesome." Suspiciously pouting, Fluttershy dropped back down and lay next to her again. "I love the calls of birds looking for special somebirdies," she cooed to the skies, "Don't you think it's just wonderful?" Five seconds later, she felt another breeze and heard Dash's response. "Yup, super cool." Without moving the rest of her, Fluttershy stuck a hoof out and put it on her shoulder. "Rainbow Dash, if you run off one more time, I'm going to cry. A lot." "Whaaat?!" Rainbow Dash inhaled. "Me?! Run off?! I'd never!" "You didn't even hear the corn-cobbling robins just now..." "Sure I did! They make the buzzsaw noise, I heard it -- OH!" Dash's wings locked in place and her whole body shook as Fluttershy, now standing, gave her about half of a Stare. "Rainbow Danger Running-Off Dash, please do not lie to me!" Fluttershy gently scolded. "The corn-cobbling robin isn't even out this time of year, it's the wheat-threshing robin, as you would have heard me say if you hadn't run off..." She sniffed. "I don't appreciate you... skipping out on me!" Dash drooped. "You're right..." she admitted. "I'm sorry. I... have a lot of trouble sittin' still." "I understand," Fluttershy sympathized. "You always preferred P.E. to the classroom... But you made a promise you'd spend today with me..." Now her eyes were big and sad. "You're right, I did. I'll stay within speaking distance," Dash offered, feeling guilty. "I just need to stretch my wings out." "That's perfectly fine," Fluttershy beamed. "But please don't scare the birds." "I'll go slow," Dash relented with a sigh. "Where... the heck are we, Flutters?" "Oh!" Fluttershy jumped a bit, suddenly remembering she needed to explain that. She fell onto her face with a yelp and carefully rose. "I thought you might appreciate a change of scenery... Um, this is Tree Hugger's yoga class." "You sure it's not a dojo?" Dash raised an eyebrow. They were standing on an agonizingly-polished hardwood floor, surrounded by shoji walls. While Rainbow Dash wisely floated a hand or two off the ground, Fluttershy was having trouble standing, slipping like a deer trying to ice skate. Both of them winced from the glare of the wax. "... I can't say for sure..." Fluttershy considered. She jumped and collapsed again at the sound of someone approaching. "Whoooaaa," Tree Hugger greeted them, striding effortlessly across the slippery floor. "Like, Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash... Suuuuh girls..?" After a beat, she slowly raised her head and pouted up at Rainbow Dash, her eyes still relaxed. "Mare... you gotta embrace the challenge... don't fly away from your difficulties..." "What?" Dash deadpanned. "I think she wants you to land, Rainbow Dash..." Fluttershy translated. Tree Hugger nodded, still smiling. Scoffing, Dash relented and dropped, immediately slipping and falling with a squeak. "You gotta become one with the floor," Tree Hugger explained. "Is that so," Dash retorted, her face smack against the ground. "So, like... you mares here to find inner peace? Far out... farther in," Tree Hugger mumbled. She beckoned with one hoof while moonwalking back into the next room. "I'm not imbibing anything," Dash hissed to Fluttershy, struggling to get back to her hooves. "No matter how much I gotta for this to make sense." "Rainbow Dash..!" Fluttershy gasped. "Tree Hugger doesn't..." She paused at Rainbow Dash's half-lidded stare and sighed. "Well I don't, and I won't ask you to, either..." "I'm glad we're good enough friends to understand each other," Rainbow Dash sassed. The two of them gradually tap-danced into the next room. "Be the tree," Tree Hugger said, standing on one hoof and contorting the rest of herself into a vaguely spruce-like shape. "The child of the forest is the tree." "I would love to be a tree," came the chorus in response, Fluttershy a bit more passionately than others. She and Rainbow Dash were the only ones who'd copied the pose. The others varied from wobbly ballerina poses to falling on their faces. "The path to enlightenment is full of bumps and bruises," Tree Hugger apologized, switching to a narrow, javelin-like stance, "But trees are tough. You can't punch a tree down." She paused. "Unless you're really strong, but most ponies can't do that..." "Trees are pretty tough," came the chorus. Again, only Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash copied the stance perfectly, though it seemed the class was a little more on-point for this one. Fluttershy blushed, grateful that no one was looking her way. Fluttershy had to admit, she was surprised Rainbow Dash was behaving so well. She wasn't complaining, or looking around, or anything. Fluttershy felt guilty for mistrusting her friend. She should let Rainbow Dash decide the next activity. Fluttershy felt she had been very bossy today. "This one might be kind of hard..." Tree Hugger admitted. "... so it's okay if you can't do it. But trees are resilient. Even carried away by floods and buried upside-down, they persist through adversity." She was now standing on one fore-hoof, her other limbs spread out for balance. "U-um!" Fluttershy shrank. She didn't have the nerve to take a candid stance like that. But Rainbow Dash did, without any delay or apparent difficulty. Fluttershy knew Rainbow Dash's front legs were pretty strong - she could beat Applejack in foreleg-wrestling - but she found her ease in this posture to be amazing. Also, her confidence. Even Pinkie would think twice about exposing herself so freely. ... Well, usually after doing so... "Even trees need to rest," Tree Hugger mumbled, now sitting with her legs crossed and her front hooves pressed together like she was praying. "They rest evermore, evergreen. They silently ruminate over the untold arcana of the aether, reading the flow of the life force and pondering forthcoming designs." "Huh?" the class answered in sync, though this pose at least was easy. Fluttershy's ears pricked as she realized Rainbow Dash hadn't been joining in any of the choruses. Tree Hugger sat there quietly smiling... until her ears pricked as well, turning this way and that to locate a strange sound as the rest of her stayed stock-still. Her smile dropped slightly. "... That's some weird juju..." she pondered as the noise grew louder. Suddenly paling and then going red with intense embarrassment, Fluttershy realized what the strange noise was and why Rainbow Dash was so calm and cooperative. She suddenly wished she could make like a tree and get out of here, never to show her face in public again. "Rainbow Dash," Tree Hugger drawled, "Trees are wonderful creatures with many wonderful traits, but they don't snore..." She waited a beat, then sighed. "Rainbow Dash!" she called sharply. Fluttershy cringed and hid her face. Oh dear, she's lost her mojo, she fretted. I'll have to apologize to her... "Sssnrk-huh?" Rainbow Dash answered, her eyes blinking open. "Oh, uh, I wanna be a tree 'n' stuff..." "How do you play!" Fluttershy managed to yell fearfully. She had to yell, for she could hardly hear herself over the dings and beeps and chatter of the local arcade. Rainbow Dash had gotten to pick the next activity, and she picked the arcade. Now they were staring at an air hockey table. Fluttershy poked at one of the strikers, as though afraid it would come to life and attack her. "It's easy!" Rainbow Dash loudly assured her. "You put your hoof on this thing - it's called a striker - and you smack the puck with it! The table is slippery and has air blowing out so it slides really far! You wanna try to smack it so it goes into my goal here!" She pointed at the slot on her side of the table. "I'm gonna try to get it to go into yours!" She pointed at the other slot on Fluttershy's side. "That sounds violent!" Fluttershy protested feebly. "You're not trying to hit me!" Rainbow Dash clarified. "C'mon, give it a shot, it's fun!" "Okay..!" Fluttershy ceded, and gingerly put her hoof on her striker, leaning clumsily over the table. Rainbow Dash took her place at the other end, smirking. "Eh!" Fluttershy squeaked, lightly tapping the puck. Dash's smirk fell as the puck slowly slid towards her. "Fluttershy..." she pouted. "Like this!" CRACK! Fluttershy squeaked and jumped back as the puck rapidly zig-zagged down the table and cleanly scored into her goal. She dropped back down timidly, then squeaked and leapt back again as the puck clattered into the side pocket. Dash sighed. "Fluttershy, come on. Grab the puck and put it back on the table! I scored, so you hit first again." "O-Okay..!" she relented, gently setting the puck back down. "I guess I need to hit it harder... Oof!" Once again, the puck slowly meandered towards Rainbow Dash. She quietly growled, hoping Fluttershy wouldn't hear over the commotion. CRACK! Once again, Fluttershy jumped away from the table. "Stop doing that!" Dash complained. "Do I have to play against myself? Come on, Fluttershy! As long as your hoof's on the striker it won't hurt you! Look, if you win, I'll help you knit a dumb sweater for one of your squirrels!" "Do you mean it?" Fluttershy called. "Yeah!" Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Okay! I'm sorry! I'll really do it this time!" Fluttershy promised, pouting. "Give me a second!" She closed her eyes and went into some sort of trance. "Really!" Dash objected, leaning onto the table with one leg and waiting impatiently. Fluttershy inhaled, exhaled, smiled, and set the puck on the table. Dash jumped up and seized her striker, not looking enthused. Fluttershy silently tapped the puck, once more slowly gliding towards Rainbow Dash. "Oh come on!!" Dash cried. CRACK! Fluttershy instantly moved her striker to a corner. Dash's puck pinballed down the table, bounced off of Fluttershy's striker, and zig-zagged back into her own goal in a blink. Dash stared, then looked down as the puck clattered into the pocket on her side. "Oops!" Fluttershy called brightly. "What." Dash wondered, fishing the puck out and holding it at leg's length like it had fallen from space. She glanced back at Fluttershy's innocent smile and back to the puck. Then she raised an eyebrow and set it down. "Uh... My turn to hit!" CRACK! Fluttershy flicked her wrist and deflected Dash's straight shot. Her wings jerking in surprise, Dash moved her striker just a bit too far forward, the puck bouncing off and into her goal once more. Dash blinked, lost for words, then nodded and silently set the puck back down. "Okay, you asked for it..." Two red-faced pegasuseses flew out of the arcade, their forelegs hanging limply. "I can't believe everyone stopped to watch," Fluttershy mumbled. "I can't believe you sharked me," Rainbow Dash rasped. "I'm so proud of you." "O-oh my, I didn't mean to put on a false pretense," Fluttershy deflected. "Um... Did you have fun?" "Of course I didn't have fun! I didn't win!" Dash objected. After a pause, they both dropped and began laughing. "Hahaha! Ow, haha, oh man my hooves hurt," Rainbow Dash guffawed. "The dumb puck kept flying off the table and smacking our wrists," Fluttershy giggled. "You owe Shirley a sweater, by the way..." "What?!"