The Soldier and his Rider

by Joe Toon

Chapter 8: Party

"Ms Rarity, while I do appreciate the generous offer, I assure you that none of this is necessary."

"Nonsense Sergeant! If you expect me... Nay, anypony to allow you to attend a party with a bloodstained, tattered combat uniform then you are sorely mistaken! You need to be presentable, darling! You are a soldier and an officer, therefore you must look your best, now hold still whilst I take your measurements!"

"(Sigh) Very well, but I insist I keep my trousers on, or at the very least my pants. It is deplorable and undignified for a man to be in the nude while in the presence of a lady."

"Why? Is there a problem among your kind to be naked?"

"If you must know Ms Rarity, Mankind has little to no fur, coat or hair around their body. Their skin is not as thick as most creatures and therefore often suffer from physical complications when left too long in exposure; such as catching a cold."

"Fascinating! I always wondered why that was the case when I went to see the human world."

"That is hardly the main reason, Joshua! There is a certain decorum to uphold! One should never expose themselves unless for medical reasons, bathing or intimacy with another of the opposite sex."

"Oh? Oh. OOOOOH! Oh my! We must look like savages to you! I'm sorry, I should have realised!"

Rarity and Twilight brought the guests of honour into Carousel Boutique for a fitting. Due to the conversation earlier however, both Rarity and Twilight blushed at the sudden realisation of certain social cues and etiquette to do with clothing (and became rather self conscious that they have been ignoring said etiquette in his presence).

"Look, don't worry about it your Highness, Ms Rarity," Joshua tries to assure the two ladies, "He doesn't consider you Human so you don't have to concern yourself whether or not you're wearing anything. He's just self conscious when he is the one naked."

"On that note I've been curious," Percival asked what has been on his mind since he heard of the Seamstress' occupation, "Ms Rarity, how could a fashionista such as yourself thrive in a society that has no real need for clothing?"

"No real need?!" the porcelain unicorn gasped in offence to that statement, "My good sir, I will have you know the importance of clothing among the ponies is greater than you think! Of course, I will admit while it may not be a necessity like it may be among your kind; clothing is worn for either the most important of occasions or as a means of self-expression. You will find that several ponies wear attires to either make them recognisable or for formalities."

"So it's either to stand out or to flaunt their status in society? Are clothes a luxury here rather than a necessity?"

"Well, admittingly I suppose it very well could be, if you put it that way. However, it isn't so luxurious that no pony could not afford. Besides, they are needed come winter where every creature will have to rug-up for the cold season."

Percival paused at the thought, "Fascinating."

"Indeed, now what colour to choose," Rarity mused to herself as she began drafting designs for a replacement uniform for the party until a gasp with a bright smile came out of her. "IDEA!" came her sing-song announcement.

At breakneck speed, she rushed into her workshop and began her work. An assortment of sounds could be heard from the room as well as the voice of Rarity humming and talking to herself. About an hour later, the unicorn burst out.

"I'm done!" came her sing-song tune as she held out a coat, "I don't have Khaki coloured dyes I'm afraid but I figured red might do. So, what do you think?"

Percival gave a deadpan look at the coat. It oddly enough resembled an old 19th Century British uniform.

"This. This looks like an old officer's Uniform, but it was phased out about two hundred years ago. Nobody wears red anymore," he said calmly before turning to look at Rarity's disappointed expression. "But I suppose it will have to do," he sighed, "After all the effort you put into it, who am I to refuse a gift horse in the mouth? Um, figuratively speaking of course."

At that Rarity's face lit up, "Oh wonderful! Here, put it on and let us have a look!" And a fitting later she gasped excitedly, "Oh darling, you look superb! Very... What's the word? Proper! That's right! Prim and Proper!"

They all looked at the sergeant in the vintage uniform while viewed himself on a mirror. "Well, I admit Ms Rarity; I do like the colour."

"WELCOME TO TOWN HALL!"

The eruptive greeting came from the whole town as the two guests arrived. They arrived escorted by Rarity and Twilight as they were bombarded with cheers and greetings. Everyone (pony or otherwise) circled the entrance jumped out with surprise, some firing party poppers; blasting confetti at the two. Pinkie Pie on the other hand went the extra mile and fired her signature "Party Cannon" causing the soldiers to instinctively duck for cover.

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Are you MAD?!" Percival glared at the pink mare with intent, catching everyone off guard.

Pinkie's mane deflated as she doubled down, "W-what? D-did I do something wrong?"

"Did you do something wron...?" Joshua looked at her as though she might as well have unpinned a grenade in front of them, "WHY DO YOU HAVE A CANNON HERE?! Much less fire it in a crowded area?!"

"Oh, you mean this?" Pinkie pointed at her Party cannon, "It's my Party Cannon, silly. I use it to fire out party favours, cakes, decorations, and confetti to complete the party, of course. On that note, HAPPY WELCOME TO PONYVILLE AND THANKS FOR SAVING THE TOWN!"

The two took a moment to process the information from Pinkie. Finally, Percival stood up, shook his head and drew a long breath as he sighed, "Ms Pie, I don't know whether to be grateful for the effort of putting this event together in our honour, be amused by such a ridiculous explanation or," he turned to her and almost snarled, "STANGLE YOU FOR SCARING US HALF TO DEATH! Who in the right mind retrofits a primitive artillery piece to have it fire confetti? I could give you a list of so many violations to Health and Hazard, especially in an Event!"

"Sgt Percival, there's no need to be overreactive," Rarity assures them with her hooves on their shoulders, "We assure you that Pinkie's Party Cannon is quite safe. We've never had a party without them and we've most certainly never had any issues with it." She paused for a moment to think back, "Well, except that one time but it was resolved."

Percival raised an eyebrow, "Is it a common occurrence to host festivities with retrofitted artillery?"

"Well, not exactly," Twilight answered with her encyclopedic knowledge, "Not all party planners in Equestria use extravagant tools like Party Cannons for festivities, as you would put it. However, you'll be hard pressed to find a party planner without a signature flare to liven up a party. For Example, there was Cheese Sandwich who used a Party Howitzer for his celebrations."

"A HOWITZER?!" Joshua's jaws dropped.

So this must be how Alice felt when she found Wonderland thought Percival.

"Hey, why are we just sitting still here?!" came the complaint of Rainbow Dash, "This is a party! Let's have some fun!"

As the crowd decided to carry on with the festivities, Joshua and Percival stood up from their fallen spot as they looked around the Town Hall. It wasn't just ponies that were taking part it seems. There was a pair of donkeys, a familiar Zebra, a few dragons, two griffins, a Yak, a strange bug looking thing, and a hippogriff. If there were Elves, Dwarves and Men, Percival would have thought that he was back in the Eridan Empire.

"Is everything alright, Mr Percival? Mr Joshua?"

The two turned to the soft voice belonging to Fluttershy who was looking at the worryingly.

"Oh, nothing's wrong Ms Fluttershy," Joshua replied, "Just a little overwhelmed at what we are seeing." He paused as he thought for a moment, "You know, I've never actually been to festivities before, much less in our honour."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I was just a simple horse before coming here after all. No sentience whatsoever."

"Oh right," Fluttershy gave a knowing look before fidgeting her forehooves as though she was reluctant to ask but tries anyway, "So... What is it like? Being an animal I mean. You see, I take care of animals for a living and while I can communicate with them, I don't really know what's it like being one."

Joshua pondered for a moment, "To be honest, I don't know what to tell you. It's like you know what you are, you know who to serve and all you care really is food, care and mate and everything else doesn't really matter. That's for me anyway. I can still remember everything as a simple animal but after we came here, everything became clear and I began to question everything."

"Oh my, It wasn't bother, was it?"

"On the contrary, it was nothing short of a miracle."

"So this party then, it must be very special to you?"

Joshua gave a wide smile, "More than you know it."

"What are just standing there for? Aren't you going to eat?"

"Begging your pardon Ms Pie, but don't you usually say a blessing before partaking into festivities?"

"A Blessing? Oh, you mean a Prayer? Wow Georgie, I didn't know you were a traditionalist!"

"What's going on? Is something the matter?" Twilight approached Pinkie and Percival in the middle of their discussion of party etiquette.

"Georgie was just asking me if we hold prayers before the party," Pinkie replied with a toothy smile.

"A prayer?" Twilight let that thought float in the air before clicking the dots, "Oh that's right! You did mention that you have a belief in a deity."

"Personally, it's more for tradition then anything else really." Percival corrected.

A spark lit her eyes as she gasped with excitement, "Could you say one now? It would be a perfect opportunity to get to know a bit of your culture and even your religious values. Please, do! I could document this moment for prosperity as a small cultural exchange!"

The sergeant winced nervously at her request. He was about to decline until Twilight and Pinkie both gave him those eyes that tugged his heart. These creatures are just like the household dogs that give you those longing eyes when they expect something out of you. He gave a sigh and caved in, "Very well, I'll provide one. But I need the floor to be silent for a moment."

"Of course!" Twilight lifted a glass with her magic and rang a spoon to silence the floor, "Attention, attention everyone!" All went silent as the princess continues, "I'd like to propose a toast to Sgt George Percival and Pvt Joshua of Cornwall for their act of bravery to defend our beloved town of Ponyville. Despite being strangers from another world they went out of their way to protect our town from danger. To our new heroes."

"To our new heroes!" cheered the town.

"On another note," Twilight continued, "as bit of a cultural exchange between our worlds I have asked the good Sergeant to perform a custom from his world." She turned to Percival and gestured for him to take the lead, "Sgt Percival, you may do the honours."

The human took a step forward and looked around the hall. All eyes were staring at him with anticipation and curiosity. He had never had an audience before which made him twitch slightly, but with a deep breath he steeled his nerves and began his prayer,
"Almighty Father, Lord of all creation. I thank you for this blessed day. Despite all the turmoil and the attack I thank you for day resolving in victory, for securing the safety of all within the town. I thank you for the hospitality of all the residents within this town, despite being strangers from a strange land they welcomed us. Not just for our service unto them but for their desire to help others. I ask you oh Lord to bless them. Bless this town, it's people, it's leaders. Bless all their endeavours, their livelihoods, their friends and families, their land. I finally ask that you bless the food that we shall partake in celebration of today. May it nourish us physically and spiritually. In the name of your son, Christ the Lord. Amen. In Nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti. Amen."

Unbeknownst to everyone else in the floor, the six bearers of the elements couldn't help but notice a faint glow across the room as he concluded his prayer.

"Did my eyes deceive me or did he just caused to room to glow there for a minute?" Rarity whispered.

"Yeah, I know right?" whispered Rainbow Dash, "For a dude who claims he can't use magic, it sure looked like magic to me."

"Well we can't know for sure, Sugarcube," whispered Applejack, "Ah reckon he was mighty honest when he said he can't use magic."

"Does it really matter if it was magic or not?" asked Fluttershy (in her normal voice), "I mean, it did look pretty and it wasn't doing any harm."

"And why are we all whispering?" whispered Pinkie Pie, "I thought this wasn't suppose to be a whispering party."

"I think it would be prudent if we say nothing about this to anypony."

The five of them looked at Twilight with bewilderment.

"I know what all of you are thinking right now, but everything you just saw must never be spoken." Twilight's voice carried a seriousness reminiscent of her predecessors that somehow sent a chill to their spines.

"You know Twi, I would have thought you'd be the one to jump at the opportunity to go full egghead on what we just saw," Rainbow spoke out inquisitively, "Why the sudden change of mind?"

"Three reasons, Rainbow Dash; 1. No one but us seems to take notice of the glow and I would rather not raise unwanted attention for what should be a party. 2. When I touched George's invisible barrier earlier today, I connected with something. Something that warned me not to pry any further for his safety and for our security to which I made a promise not to. 3. That something also warned me that we are being watched. At first I thought it was just simple test from a being that could possibly be greater than Celestia herself but after the timber wolves and from what the sergeant told me about his experience with wolves tells me that something else is going on in here."

Pinkie gasped, "YOU MEAN WE'RE BEING SPIED AT?"

Applejack and Rarity covered the pink mare's mouth and gave her a "Shush!" to which the mare complied.

"You're not really suggesting that it was all foul play, are you darling?" Rarity asked as she and Applejack released Pinkie.

"Actually, Twilight might not be wrong," Fluttershy added, "The timber wolves have never approached the town like that before. Something must have upset them."

Twilight stared at all her friends before turning to the townsfolk as they carry on with the festivities. She then looked at the two guests as they interacted with the ponies. She gave a smile and returned to eye at her friends, " I believe we shall discuss more of this another time. For now, let's just enjoy the night. Besides, I believe our guests of honour have a lot of stories to tell."

"So there we were; me, the sergeant and our battalion of three hundred volunteers were stationed in this outpost to hold out against the Kalderin Swarm."

"Pardon me, Mr Joshua but what's a Kalderin?"

"Ugh! Pipsqueak, we've already heard him say that!"

"But I didn't get to hear it."

"No, it's okay. What a Kalderin is, young colt is a parasitic xeno. A fungal swarm controlled by a hivemind that devours everything in its path and turns their poor victims into one of them, adding their numbers."

"Eeep!"

"Creepy!"

"But going back, we had to hold the outpost to allow the locals from the planet to evacuate either by their ships or the Gate. But when we saw the Swarm that was rushing towards us, we thought we were goners. Thousands... No, Millions of them surrounded the outpost. Imagine, Three hundred Volunteers against a literal tidal wave of bodies ready to swallow us whole! But we held; oh, we held! For three days we held against them, most of my brothers and sisters were in a state of panic, all of our riders fought desperately to hold the outpost. Then when the sun rose on the third day, we were down to our last line of defense. We all knew we were going to die."

"Gasp."

"Or so we thought. As we watched the swarm rush towards our lines, our captain called out and pointed high above the cliffside where our outpost was built next to. And then we saw..."

"Yes?"

"THE WINGED HUSSARS' DIVISION! Hundreds of Landships and Airships swept across the battlefield and burnt their way across the swarm! It was like a miracle that they came to our rescue as they cut a path through them to regroup with us. That whole morning they blasted artillery and dropped bombs into the ranks of their infected corpses, rescuing us from the Swarm and allowing us to escape the planet once and for all.

"Oooooh!"

Joshua took a swing from a tankard and slammed it on the table, "And that was how we managed to survive against an overwhelming swarm of monsters."

The listening crowd of both young and old clapped their hooves (and claws) together with some cheering and commenting questions like, "How does a landship look like?" or "Did that really happen?"

Percival who was listening to his steed recount the tale when he and his Division were sent to escort a delegation of Xenos call Kaldivians to a summit on a Neutral planet only to be attacked by the infamous scourge of their Galaxy made him shiver at the memory. Though he was quite impressed that Joshua somehow not only managed to remember the siege but also managed to tell it as though it were a heroic epic told in bars when many of his comrades were still plagued by nightmares of the event. He took a swing from his flask, trying to drown that memory from his mind.

"Mr Percival, was what Mr Joshua said true?"

The sergeant looks down to see three fillies look at him expectantly, one of whom he recognised earlier that day.
"Ah, Little Ms Apple Bloom was it?"

"Howdy, Mr Percival," the little filly gave an infectious smile, "How're doin' with your injury and all?"

"A lot better, thank you," he reached his hand on her mane and patted a brush on it. "I swear, you lot are the third most adorable creatures I've ever seen," he thought out loud.

The three fillies blushed with embarrassment. "Aw, shucks Mister," Apple Bloom gave a squee.

Percival removed his hand from the filly's mane and turned to the other two before returning to Apple Bloom, "Are you not going to introduce me to your friends, Little Miss?"

"Agh! Right." Apple Bloom rubbed her mane with a sheepish smile before gesturing a forehoof for introductions, "Mr Percival, this here is Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo. Together, we three are the Cutie Mark Crusaders!"

Percival raised an eyebrow, clearly confused, "Cu-Cutie Mark? Did I hear that right?"

"What's the matter?" the unicorn Sweetie Belle asked, "Don't you know what a Cutie Mark is?"

"I'm afraid not, but do enlighten me."

"Wait, you mean you actually don't have Cutie Marks in your world?" Scootaloo exclaimed at Percival who in turn shook his head. "A Cutie Mark is a symbol of a pony's special talent! It appears on our flanks once we discover what our special talent is. For our case, our marks symbolise that our special talent is to help others discover their special talent," the little pegasus gave a proud smirk as she spun around to expose her flank with her mark.

"...I see," Percival deadpanned before forming a small grin, "I thought those marks are some sort of identification tattoos. I suppose I'm not far off the mark, as it were."

Choosing to ignore the poor pun, Sweetie Belle pushed the previous question, "About what Mr Joshua said earlier, did you really fight against terrifying monsters?"

"Duh! Of course it must be true! We all saw what he did with the timber wolves, it shouldn't be a surprise that he took on alien zombies!" Scootaloo rebutted.

Percival gave a wry smile at the expectant fillies and with a soft voice replied, "A little romanticised but more or less true. But if it is all the same for you little ones, I would prefer not to recount my side of the story. As heroic as it sounds, I lost many comrades that day; same would be said in the many battles I've survived."

The trio's smiles dropped at the implication of his words. They know of the concept of death and war, but until they heard his request they realised he must have lost so many of his friends and decided that it was prudent not to pursue the topic.

Then Sweetie Belle had an idea, "Apple Bloom mentioned that you and Joshua are good singers. If it isn't any problem, would you mind if you could sing one for us?"

Percival chuckled, "Perhaps another time, Little Ms Sweetie Belle. I'm not sure if I'm in the appropriate mood for a song."

The fillies groaned with disappointment, to which Percival winced at their dejected eyes that were practically begging him. He turned his gaze to his side to avoid theirs when Applejack sat next to him with two tankards of beverage, "Something the matter, Sergeant? Why aren't you celebratin'?"

"This is me celebrating, Ms Applejack," Percival eyed the drinks she brought with her, "A little quiet time with a drink as I soak up the atmosphere."

"Then why aren't ya'll getting into the thick of it?" Applejack jabbed his shoulder, "Do some socialising! Have some cider! At the very least get some real party food! All ya got there is just roast vegetables!"

Percival rubbed his shoulder from Applejack's jab. Good Lord, does she pack a punch! "Maybe your event planner should have taken my dietary needs to consideration before having half the food made of hay, grass and flowers. The only thing edible to me are the assortment of fruits and vegetables, your pastries on the other hand could kill me."

Applejack raised an eyebrow, "Well why didn't ya say so earlier? Could have saved you the trouble!" She scooted a tankard in front of him, "At the very least try some of Sweet Apple Acres Apple Cider. It's the finest cider in this side of Equestria!"

"Is that so?" Percival eyed her skeptically.

"I don't lie, Sergeant," Applejack warmly smiled.

Percival eyed the beverage in front of him and lifted the tankard. He took a quick smell of the drink and was overwhelmed by the sugary-fruity scent before taking a sip. His eyes widened with delighted surprise as he guzzled down the rest of the drink and emptied his tankard.

He licked his lips and turned to look at Applejack's expecting gaze, "It's good. This is by far the sweetest thing I've ever tasted."

"See, I told you it's good!" the farmer smirked proudly, "This here is probably be the best Cider ya'll ever taste."

"I said it was good, I didn't say it was the best I've ever had."

To that Applejack did a double-take, "Say what now?"

"I won't deny that your family cider is good. The problem though is that it is too sweet, almost sugary even. A perfect cider has that balance of sweetness and fruity flavour," the sergeant explained before opening his flask and poured its content into the tankard.

"Is that a fact?" Applejack narrowed her eyes.

"No, it's my opinion," Percival dryly said, "It may well be a fact that your cider is the best that your world has to offer, but in my opinion yours doesn't compare to what mine has to offer."

"Well that's a mighty strong opinion you got there," one of Applejack's eyes twitched at what might just be the greatest insult to her honour, "Ah hope you've got some proof to back that claim."

As Percival finished filling his tankard with the content of his flask an idea came to his mind. He smiled mischievously as he turned to Applejack, "Then allow me to persuade you." He changed his gaze to the Crusaders, still keeping his grin, "So, you girls still want to hear a song?"

"Woah AJ, what's happening here?"

"The Sergeant here is tryin' to convince me that his world has the better cider than ours."

"Whaaat? No way! There's no way anyone could beat your family's Apple cider!"

"Shhh!"

"Everyone, can I have your attention please?"

Percival was now standing on top of a chair, holding his flask high up. Next to him was Joshua who was brought to him by the Cutie Mark Crusaders for his presentation. All eyes were now on the human as the room turned silent.

"I will admit I am not as interactive with all of you in this "Party" you have thrown in our welcome, so in spirit of friendship I have decided to share a gift from my world to your town. As a challenge from Ms Applejack's cider, I present to all of you (who are old enough of course) to have a taste of one of my world's best cider."

As he said this, he filled more tankards from his flask which had many onlookers wondering how could a small flask produce so much drink.

"And you're saying this is the best that your world has to offer?" Rainbow Dash asked skeptically with a smirk.

"Why of course," Percival smiled, "After all..."

And just like that, out of nowhere he broke into song.

Percival intended to merely sing the song but as the song progressed he kept taking a swing from his drink. Soon he began to dance to the tune followed by Joshua's harmony and then later the rest of the townsfolk who were brave enough (and old enough) to taste his beverage joined in the chorus.

Among them was a certain cyan pegasus mare who was at first skeptical but after noticing the surprised look of the ponies who had a taste of the cider decided to try it for herself. And she was not disappointed. To Rainbow Dash, it certainly wasn't the sweetest cider she ever tasted but boy, did it come with a kick! It was smooth and fruity but strong to the taste.

"Applejack," Rainbow looked at her competitive farmer friend after emptying her tankard of Percival's cider with a smirk, "you might have just gotten yourself a competitor."

Soon the entire town hall was consumed with the singing, and just as Percival hit the final note of the long chorus he collapsed on the floor, dead drunk and unconscious with a goofy smile.