//------------------------------// // Random Moments 4 - #03 // Story: Equestria Girls Random Moments 4 // by Arthor2017 //------------------------------// Derpy Hooves hasn't been seen in the last weeks, neither day nor night; no one knows what could have happened to the teen and her absence generates consternation among those who know her. One day, Paesley decides to pay a visit at Derpy's house in hopes to find out the reason for her 'disappereance'. "Hello, Derpy? It's me! Please open up." The door barely opens but leaves enough room for Derpy to show up, at least she's fine. Paesley notices Derpy is looking at her with narrowed eyes , something very unusual coming from a kind person like her. "Are you alone?" Derpy asks. "Uh… yeah. Why the mystery?" " Shhhh! Lower your voice, they can hear you!" Derpy brings Paesley into the house, closing the door and curtains at the same time. "Sorry for my behavior, I was working on something very important." "I see. And may I know what it is about?" "I have discovered a method to generate fifty dollar bills!" "Really?" Paesley takes with great emotion one of the many bills that were placed on a table, examining the money backwards and forwards. They were indeed fifty dollar bills! Whatever method the young woman with the averted gaze used was quite innovative. "Derpy, you are a genius! How do you do it?" "Very simple: I pick up a five hundred dollar bill and then I erase a zero with a marker." Supreme court. Abacus Cinch leads the trial against a man on multiple counts of fraud. He would surely be sentenced to life imprisonment if the testimony of the following witness turns out to be true. Judge Cinch gives the order for said witness to enter the stand. Presenting before her a beautiful woman, in the peak of her 25 years, and apparently the defendant knows her due to the grimace of disgust on his face. "Tell me miss, do you know the accused?" Abacus Cinch ask. "No, your honor." The young woman responds. The atmosphere is filled with gasps and whispers from both the public and the members of the jury. The lady's testimony took them by surprise. "Hold on a second! Are you not the defendant's wife?" Abacus Cinch asks upset. "Indeed your honor, but if I knew him I would never have married him!" The lady exclaims. XIV Century In the garden within a stately castle Sunset Shimmer dedicates a melody she composed to Princess Twilight Sparkle. Suddenly King Night Light and Queen Twilight Velvet enter the place. "My daughter, I recall telling you that you should no longer see this person anymore." Night Light pronounces by taking Twilight away from the flame haired lady. "It's not fair! Why you don't want me to be with Sunset?" "Because she doesn't belong to our class, my child. Besides, we've already offered your hand in holy marriage to Prince Blueblood." "That's right, your Highness!" Says Blueblood, who accompanies the monarchs of the kingdom. "And I must add that, unlike this peasant, blue blood runs through my veins." "Don't make me laugh! This buffoon doesn't have a hint of blue blood, and I can prove it." Sunset Shimmer leaves the courtyard for a moment to return with a huge jug, which breaks it on the prince's head in a single move. Blueblood collapses on the floor after recieving the hit, he wasn't dead but unconscious. Seconds later a stream of fresh red liquid gushes out from a cut on the blonde's forehead. "See? Red blood like chicken!" Sunset Shimmer points out. Sitting on the dock facing the sea, Maud Pie stands with her fishing pole and a bucket at her side. She had been like this for several minutes now and despite the sun's rays, plus the salty breeze, she remains in her place. The ever cheerful Pinkie Pie appears to make company her older sister. "Hi Maud! How are you doing? Are they biting?" "Yes Pinkie. They are biting, a lot." Maud says in her typical stoic voice. "Ooooooooh!! Let me guess: Cod? Sardines? Herring? Flounder? Tuna? Swordfish?" "No. Mosquitoes." Maud responds trying to ward off the pesky insects that keep biting her. A man stands on the corner of an avenue waiting for the traffic light to change so he can cross to the other side of the street. At that moment a helpless person, Trixie Lulamoon, comes up to beg. "Please good man, collaborate with a coin." Trixie pleads with her saddest look. The gentleman, however, doesn't seem to like the plea and instead decides to scold the teenager. "Listen here miss, aren't you ashamed to be begging on the street?" "And what do you want Trixie to do? Set up an office?" Trixie replies angrily. Early in the morning Big Mactintosh goes to the office of Gustave Le Grand, owner of the circus, taking with him a huge fat pig. Those who saw him were curious about the pig's presence; only Big Mac knows the reason of bringing this animal into the circus and Gustave Le Grande will know it too. "Let's see if I understood correctly: you want to propose a number where you are going to eat the pig you brought, right?..." "Eeyup." "… In only five minutes?" "Eeyup." Big Mac answers again. "I understand. To be honest I'm not convinced, but I'll give you the chance to prove the worth of your number and control the time by myself. Do you want to try now?" "Sure. First we must prepare the pig." After slaughtering and cooking the animal, Big Mac proceeds with a speed never seen before, while Gustave Le Grand keeps track of time. When Big Mac finished devouring the pig, the timer ticked exactly five minutes. Not bad. Not bad at all! Mr. Le Grande thought after seeing the singular act. This would make him rich in no time. Gustave hires Big Mac inmediately and puts him in the main event of the morning show. The audience was so in awe at the strange act they began to form long lines at the circus just to watch a guy of few words devouring a huge pig in its entirety. The profits rose like the foam of the sea, doubling the joy of Mr. Le Grande. "Wonderful Big Mac! I always knew your number would be successful, but one doesn't need to be conformists, right? That's why I want to make you a proposal: I will double your salary if you eat a whole pig at the morning show and one at the evening show, what do you say?" "… Okay." With this new deal the Big Mac number was featured as the main act in the morning and afternoon events for several more days, the profits were so great that Mr. Le Grande had to open a new bank account at another bank. Then, the unthinkable happened: Big Mactintosh broke his own record after finishing eating a pig in four minutes and seventeen seconds . The public explodedin in excitement, chanting the name of Mactintosh loudly. Of course Gustave Le Grande was willing to make even more profits out of this. "Bravo! Épique! Magnifique! Big Mac, I'll triple your pay if you eat THREE whole pigs. One pig in the morning, one pig in the afternoon, and one pig in the night. What do you say, mon ami?" "I'm really sorry, but that's not going to happen." Big Mactintosh answers. This leaves Gustave Le Grande puzzled. He was giving him the biggest opportunity of his life and turns it down!! "B-B-but… I don't understand. Why you don't want to accept?!" "Because at night I usually eat at my house." Big Mac responds before moving on retreat to Sweet Apple Acres with a full belly.