As Twilight set up her telescope and Spike set out a large blanket on a hilltop outside her palace, Pinkie Pie was off chasing luminescent butterflies in the dusk. It was truly a beautiful night. The stars shone like diamonds in the sky, and galaxies and nebulae brightened up the heavenly canvas with every color that made up the rainbow and countless colors that didn't. Pinkie could see the Moon glowing brilliantly in the sky, bringing a soft glow to the green grassy hills below.
Twilight finished the final few calibrations on her telescope, then plopped herself down on the grass. "Whew! Are you excited for tonight, Pinkie?"
"You bet your bottom bit I am!" Pinkie shouted. "Um, what's happening tonight?"
"The Perseid meteor shower is supposed to be tonight. It's supposed to be the largest meteor shower in a generation, and I don't want to miss a minute of it."
"Me neither!" Pinkie threw herself against the ground facing the stars. "When does it start, again?"
Twilight shrugged. "About an hour?"
Pinkie yawned. "I'll see if I can stay awake for that long." She could not. Within two minutes, Pinkie Pie was out cold on the grass.
When Pinkie Pie came to again, she did not wake up on the grassy hilltop outside of Twilight’s house like she expected to. Instead she woke up in an actual bed, complete with a white fluffy comforter. All around her were a small doorway carved into the far side of the room and gray stone walls devoid of any decoration whatsoever. Somepony needed to hire an interior decorator, Pinkie thought. To avoid looking at all of the gray, she instead looked out of the window, which was much more colorful indeed.
It was truly a beautiful night. The stars shone like diamonds in the sky, and galaxies and nebulae brightened up the heavenly canvas with every color that made up the rainbow and countless colors that didn't. Clouds of light purple stardust hung in the air like cotton candy. Pinkie could see the Earth glowing brilliantly in the sky, bringing a soft glow to the pale gray dusty hills below. Pinkie thought for a minute, if the Earth is out there in the sky, then...
On the other side of the room from her, Pinkie Pie could see another creature just beginning to wake up as well, in a bed just like hers. He was, to put it simply, a weird-looking creature. He looked almost like a dog, only his eyes were on the end of his snout where a dog's nostrils would be. His arms had hands and fingers on them, like those other weird creatures Twilight kept telling Pinkie about. What were they called again? Hoo-mans?
Pinkie barely had time to ponder these questions when the blue dog creature began to stir. His eyes fluttered open suddenly, and he fell off his bed, shedding the comforter along the way. Pinkie could not see that he had yet another hand on the end of his tail. The dog creature looked at his surroundings with a sense of confusion. "What? Where am I? Who are you?"
"I think the real question would be who are you?" Then, Pinkie Pie gasped as she suddenly remembered who the creature was. "Wait, I know who you are! You're the villain from the Daring Do books! What was your name again? Alice? Albert? Al Capone?"
The creature suddenly grabbed Pinkie with the hand on its tail. He glared at her menacingly. "My name is Ahuizotl! It would be wise to respect that name!"
"I don't know, I still think I like Al Capone better. What do you think, Al? Or should I call you Ally? Or how about Allen? Or Alexander? Or-"
Ahuizotl shoved his palm onto Pinkie's face in an attempt to shut her up. She kept on talking, only with her voice muffled. Ahuizotl groaned. "Where are we, anyways? This does not look like the Tenochtitlan Basin."
Pinkie popped up beside Ahuizotl and giggled, much to his surprise. "Well of course it doesn't! We're on the Moon, silly!"
Ahuizotl took a grand total of ten seconds to process that last sentence, and even then he failed to entirely do so. "What?!"
"I said, we're on the Moon, silly." Pinkie knocked on Ahuizotl's head as if it were a door. "Hello? Anypony home?"
Ahuizotl furiously grabbed Pinkie with his tail-hand again. "Cease with your loudness and annoyingness! It gives me headaches!"
Suddenly, a large shadow fell over the two of them. “Ah, I see you two have arrived.”
Ahuizotl dropped Pinkie and gaped at the being casting the shadow. He looked almost like a normal pony, if you looked past his six spindly insect legs and his massive batlike wings. His body was a deep midnight blue, and he sported a magnificent gray beard that ran along halfway to the ground.
“Welcome, brave and noble heroes, to the Selenic Kingdom. My name is Cog.”
"Save the exposition, scorpion-pony!" Why did you bring us here?!" Ahuizotl asked.
"Our motivations are quite simple, blue one. You are here to save us," Cog said matter-of-factly.
Ahuizotl blinked. "Come again?"
"A long time ago, when our kingdom was in grave peril, a prophecy was made, that in our darkest hour, warriors of red and blue would come to our aid and save our kingdom forevermore. We have reason to believe that our darkest hour is near at hand."
Ahuizotl pointed to himself. "You're saying I'm...the Chosen One?" asked.
"Indeed you are." Cog pointed one of his legs at Pinkie Pie. "As is she."
"WHAT?!" Ahuizotl looked at Pinkie. "But, but she's not even red! She's pink!"
"Pink is a shade of red," Cog said.
"I don't care about your color semantics, scorpion-pony! I refuse to share the status of Chosen One with this annoying hyperactive squirrel! Pick someone else!"
"Squirrel?! Who are you calling a squirrel?!" Pinkie shouted.
“Silence!” Cog’s booming voice startled both Pinkie and Ahuizotl into compliance. “I will not have you two arguing over trivial matters when whole worlds are at stake! Now come with me. Our Queen would very much like to meet you in person."
The throne room of the Selenic Palace was more magnificent than any throne room either Pinkie or Ahuizotl had ever seen on Earth. The grand hall, though made of the same gray stone as the room the two chosen ones woke up in, was large and sweeping enough that, had it been built on Earth, it would have surely collapsed. The red carpet Pinkie, Ahuizotl and Cog walked upon was made of finer silk than could ever be made on Earth. Guards stood by on either side, spears at the ready, their six legs in an attack stance as if they could pounce at any moment. And, at the end of the red carpet, there was a grand staircase leading up to a pedestal, and upon that pedestal was the Queen's throne.
Cog knelt down before the Queen's throne. "Your Majesty, may I introduce you to our kingdom's greatest heroes."
The Queen rose from her throne and spread her massive bat wings wide. "Good day to you, o heroes of prophecy. I am Queen Procella of the Selenic Kingdom."
Pinkie and Ahuizotl did not kneel down before the Queen, much to her annoyance. "Hi there, Your Majesty!" Pinkie began. "We're here to save your kingdom, because apparently it's your darkest hour and the kingdom's going to be destroyed soon but there's a prophecy that says that we are the only ones who can help." Pinkie turned to Cog. "Did I get that right?"
Cog nodded. "Yes, that is the gist of it."
Queen Procella also nodded. "Indeed. So, Cog, I take it these two are proficient in their use of the Sacred Weapons?" Procella asked.
Cog blinked. "I'm sorry, Your Majesty, what?"
"The Sacred Weapons. Do these heroes wield them?"
Cog stammered for a bit, trying to come up with an adequate response. "They shall soon enough! Come with me, o noble heroes!" Cog sped past Pinkie and Ahuizotl.
"Cool your jets for just a moment, Cog." Cog slowly turned back to face Queen Procella. The Queen stormed down from her pedestal. "Are you saying that you never even made sure that these two could safely wield the Sacred Weapons before touting them before me as the heroes of prophecy?"
"...Yes?"
Procella put the tip of the leg against her forehead and groaned. "We're doomed."
After much yelling and arguing, the heroes of prophecy, Cog, and Queen Procella made their way to the Palace's armory. The room was filled with all the kinds of weapons that Pinkie and Ahuizotl could recognize, and quite a few that they couldn’t. There were two crossed longswords hanging on a mantelpiece on the back wall. Below the swords, there was a mortar affixed to the ground.
“Behold, our most Sacred Weapons!” Cog scuttled over to the mortar. “For you, Pinkie Pie, you shall receive the Force Asteroidal to blast your enemies to dust with fire and fury."
Pinkie Pie reached out for the mortar on the ground with her hoof. The mortar dissolved into dust. The dust particles then flew past Pinkie's line of sight and began to orbit around her body in a ring. Then, the dust clung to Pinkie's body and was absorbed by her skin. Pinkie laughed uproariously. "It tickles!"
"It seems that the Force Asteroidal has made contact with you, and yet you did not die. This is excellent news!" Cog said. "Now, focus on that energy. Use the Force!"
Pinkie reached out her hoof and focused on it with all of her might, until she felt a tingling sensation at the end of her leg. Then released her focus. Her hoof exploded, and she was sent flying backwards as if she had been shot from a cannon.
“Whee, I can fly!” Pinkie giggled as she repeated the process and propelled herself into the air and floated back down to the ground over and over again.
Cog turned to Ahuizotl and pointed to the swords. "And for you Ahuizotl, you shall receive the Galactic Blades of Fire to strike down our enemies with righteous anger."
When Ahuizotl grabbed the swords from the mantelpiece, they immediately dissolved to liquid in his hands and were just as quickly absorbed by his skin. He could see the liquid metal travel up his veins as he felt a rush of power flowed through his whole body. He felt warm inside, like his insides were on fire but he felt no pain. He felt a strong tingling sensation on his palms. When he focused more intently on the tingling, two blades sprung forth from his hands, glowing bright red and giving off a tangible heat.
Ahuizotl ignited and de-ignited his Blades from his hands repeatedly, awestruck like a foal playing with their present on Hearth's Warming Eve. "The power of these Blades of Fire is incredible! It may finally be enough to stop Daring Do once and for all!" Ahuizotl laughed maniacally as he sliced anything he could see with his shiny new Blades. Rocks, walls, the mantelpiece itself, he let nothing escape his sight without leaving a deep flaming gash in it. Meanwhile, Pinkie Pie propelled herself through the air like a highly explosive jellyfish, giggling like a schoolfilly the whole time.
Queen Procella turned to Cog. “Are you sure these are truly the heroes of legend?”
“They have to be. The Sacred Weapons chose them and only them," Cog said.
“Then we are doomed.”
All of a sudden, the whole palace began to quake. Ahuizotl cut out a window from the nearest wall using his Blades. Pinkie and Ahuizotl looked out of the window and noticed that not all of the shooting stars they saw were dissolving in the night sky. Some of them were landing on the surface.
“Of course!" Cog said. "They came under the camouflage of the Perseid meteor shower! The fiends!"
One of the stars shot down through the roof of the armory and landed in front of Cog and Procella. He was unlike anything Pinkie or Ahuizotl had ever seen before. He walked on two legs, and its arms stretched almost to the ground before splitting off into five long appendages that wriggled like tentacles. His face and body were completely blank, utterly devoid of any features. His body was as pale as the moon and gave off a soft white glow like the light of a star.
“Salutations and pleasantries from Commander Arcturus.” the being spoke with a piercing monotone, almost as if he was mechanical. “Current objective: invasion and occupation of the lunar domain. Surrender will preserve lives. Surrender will be immediate.”
“Fiend! You shall have our world over our graves!” Cog shouted out.
The being paused for a few seconds to think. “Enemy proposition, understood.” Suddenly, Commander Arcturus lashed out with his long fingers, sending Cog and Queen Procella flying back.
"Hey, you can't do that!" Pinkie cried out.
Commander Artcurus turned his head towards Pinkie. "Admonition disregarded. I do not heed the cries of lower lifeforms."
"Why you…" Pinkie exploded with rage. "I am the pink guardian who fights for smiles and laughter! In the name of the Earth, I will punish you!" Pinkie propelled herself with great Force towards Commander Arcturus. The commander deftly avoided her attacks and grabbed her with his fingers. He swung the pink pony above his head like a lasso and hurled her away to the other side of the room. "Well that didn't work," she said.
“Hey!” Ahuizotl locked gaze with Commander Arcturus and drew his Blades. Before Arcturus could make a move, however, he was suddenly impacted by over a hundred pounds of pink fluff that came from nowhere. Ahuizotl ran to where the starman landed on the ground, but Commander Arcturus swept his feet just before he could sink his Blades into his enemy. Ahuizotl coughed up moondust. He got up on one knee and swung his Blades wide, hoping to slice Arcturus somewhere. Suddenly, he felt a soft presence wrap tightly around his leg, and was thrown to the other side of the room.
Before Ahuizotl could his the ground, however, he collided with Pinkie's back legs, who propelled him with great Force back towards Arcturus. Before Arcturus could even react, Ahuizotl sliced all of his tentacle fingers off with his Blades, which then dissolved into stardust before his eyes. Then, the Commander himself met the same fate.
Both chosen ones decided to rest after their hard won battle, sitting with their backs against a half-broken wall. Pinkie and Ahuizotl glanced at each other. They realized pretty quickly that if either of them were going to live for longer than five minutes, they would need to work together from now on.
“Well done, heroes. But the war is not yet won,” Cog said with dread in his voice. “If Commander Arcturus is here, then...Rex Siderum cannot be far behind.”
“Rex Siderum? Who’s that?" Pinkie asked.
Cog's expression turned dead serious. "He is the bane of the Selenic Kingdom. He is the supreme ruler of an empire that stretches across the whole galaxy, and he commands an endless army of stars to do his bidding. They say that none have defied his will and lived to tell of it. He had left the ruins of countless beings and countless worlds in his wake in his quest for ultimate dominion over the heavens.
"He's had his eye on our kingdom for many years now. The last time Rex Siderum came to our world was only four years ago, and, well…” Cog looked out wistfully out the window at the barren ruins dotted across the Moon’s surface. “Our armies were decimated. Our cities were completely obliterated, as was the Nightmare Prison. Even with our desperate defense, we only just barely managed to hold him off then. And I don’t know if we’ll be so lucky a second time.” Cog turned to look at the two chosen ones. “This is why we brought you here to our kingdom. You are the only ones who have a hope of saving us from annihilation. Only your Sacred Weapons have a chance of destroying Rex Siderum for good."
There was a large boom that shook the palace to its core, as if an asteroid had struck the ground.
Cog’s eyes widened. “He’s here!"
Out in the barren lunar landscape, Pinkie and Ahuizotl looked far and wide to find Rex Siderum until, finally, they spotted him in the distance. Really, they could hardly have missed Rex Siderum if they tried. He was as almost as tall as a mountain, and built like one too. Every step he took sent tremendous quakes through the ground and kicked up clouds of moondust that reached to the skies. On all sides, he was surrounded by the flittering lights of stars, circling around his head like gnats. He grumbled something in an unknown language and the stars dashed off to parts unknown.
Ahuizotl drew his Blades. "I'm going to rush him," he whispered to Pinkie.
"What?! That's cra-"
Before Pinkie Pie could even finish her sentence, Ahuizotl was already sprinting out to meet Rex Siderum
"Hey! You!" he bellowed.
Rex Siderum tilted his head slightly downwards. He barely even acknowledged this loudmouth ant until he noticed that his hands were glowing in a distinct manner. "You." Rex Siderum's voice was deeper than the voice of any creature Pinkie or Ahuizotl ever heard on Earth.
When Ahuizotl reached the titan's thick tree trunk of a leg, he immediately began slicing at it with his Blades. All that accomplished was warming up the skin on Rex Siderum's leg a bit.
Rex Siderum glared at Ahuizotl and plucked him from the lunar surface like a flower. Ahuizotl swung his Blades around aimlessly as he was held aloft atassuve arm's length. “You impotent fool," the titan spoke with a voice deeper than a chasm. "Your sacred weapons may sting, but they do not pierce the skin." The king of the stars slammed Ahuizotl into the lunar surface, where he made a small crater on the ground.
Pinkie Pie launched herself high into the air like a rocket and prepared to give Rex Siderum a hard blow to his face. Rex Siderum raised his hand and swatted Pinkie out of the sky, sending her careening to the ground and leaving a crater right next to Ahuizotl. The two chosen ones groaned in pain together.
“Is it okay if I make a confession before I go?” Ahuizotl asked.
“Go right ahead.”
“I never told the truth when I had the Talisman of Tonatiuh!" Ahuizotl said. "I had a countermeasure for it! It was all a ruse to gain the trust of the masses!”
Pinkie Pie cheered and triumphantly pumped her hoof. “I knew it! Twilight owes me twenty bits now!"
"Enough!" Rex Siderum loomed over the broken forms of the heroes of prophecy. "Your worthless lives end now."
Pinkie Pie and Ahuizotl glanced over at each other. In a split second, they both knew that they would only have this one chance before all hope was lost. Pinkie nodded at the blue chimera. Ahuizotl nodded at the pink squirrel-pony. They both scrambled back up to the surface before Rex Siderum had time to really notice and got into position. Pinkie laid on the ground with her back legs stretched outwards, and Ahuizotl squatted down in front of her, preparing to jump.
“I really hope this works!” Ahuizotl said.
“Yeah, well you’re not the only one!” Pinkie said back.
As Rex Siderum gazed down at the two insects at his feet, the two chosen ones knew it was now or never. Ahuizotl leaped into the air as high as he could, and Pinkie released her energy from her forehooves, launching Ahuizotl at the titan with all the power she could muster. Ahuizotl flew as if he were shot from a cannon. He drew his two fiery Blades in mid-air and screamed his head off. Before he knew it, he slammed right into Rex Siderum, slicing straight through his body. Then, he came out of the other side and rolled onto the ground without even breaking a sweat.
Rex Siderum sharply inhaled in pain, with what felt like fire spreading from the center of his body outward. He put a hand over the new hole in his body and instantly knew. Ahuizotl had sliced right through his heart with the Blades of Fire.
The mighty giant fell to his knees. Then, when he fully collapsed onto the lunar surface and succumbed to his wounds, his skin crumbled and his flesh turned to ash.
"D-did we do it?" Ahuizotl asked.
Suddenly, Pinkie Pie and Ahuizotl began to glow, and their bodies grew more and more translucent.
"I think we did it," Pinkie said. "Now that the Selenic Kingdom has been saved, the summoning spell that brought us to the Moon is wearing off because it serves no purpose now, and therefore we're being sent back to Earth."
"How do you know all of that?"
Pinkie shrugged. "I know things." Then, just as quickly as they had arrived, Pinkie and Ahuizotl vanished from the face of the Moon.
Pinkie Pie suddenly awoke on the grassy ground beside Twilight's telescope. Twilight was laying on the ground next to her.
"Couldn't stay awake, could you Pinkie?" Twilight said with a giggle. "It's a shame you didn't see the meteor shower."
"Oh that's okay, Twilight. I got my fair share of excitement tonight anyways," Pinkie said.
"Oh man, you should've been awake to see it, Pinkie!” Spike said. “The meteors went like ‘fwoom’ and ‘wooh’, and a bunch of crazy lights came off from the Moon too! It was absolutely incredible!"
Pinkie giggled with delight. "Yeah, I'll bet it was."