STAR TREK: PHOENIX
S02E02
“It’s Cold in Space”
“Personal log, supplemental.
It’s been three days since the Jem’Hadar attacked our convoy. The ship’s in better shape than we initially feared, but we’re limping the rest of the way to Starbase 375 at a snail’s pace of warp five, thanks to significant damage sustained to the warp drive coils and the nacelles. What’s worse, we’ll likely have to requisition some of the already reduced supply load to finish necessary repairs. At least we’re not arriving empty handed.
Cadeneza’s still working on the sensor logs. She refuses to give an update until she’s finished, claiming she doesn’t want to give us false information. Frankly, I think it’s because she’s in over her head and can’t figure it out, but I’m not going to say that to her face. Wouldn’t help with her morale.
Speaking of morale… the rush to affect enough repairs to get us to Starbase 375 has left Twilight and I unable to attend a counseling session with Belle. Just as well, given how much hostility there was on Twilight’s part. I still can’t believe what she said to me… wishing I was still dead. Her words have haunted my dreams every night since. Just thinking about them opens a pit in my stomach all over again.
Hopefully while we’re docked for repairs we’ll get a chance. Maybe I should tell Twilight about the nightmares. Belle knows, but if Twilight knew just how often I wake up in a cold sweat, afraid that I’m right back in the damp cave on Veridian III... If she knew, maybe she’d understand better.
Maybe.”
The Phoenix shuddered as it dropped to impulse. “We’re within visual range of Starbase 375, sir,” Rodriguez reported.
“On screen,” Liang ordered. The viewscreen lit up with a view of the Starbase, its central core resembling an oversized version of an old twentieth-century Apollo mission capsule plastered atop a duranium cylinder and stood on its end atop two massive floating discs. Six docking ports of various sizes stuck from the core like pontoons, while a gaping rectangular hole in the middle allowed for entry to the main hangar space.
Starbase 375 had quickly become a key resupply and repair stop on the way to the front lines, and it showed in the sheer number of ships floating about. The display on my chair tallied at least a hundred ships in total were present– everything from old Mirandas pressed back into service to new New Orleans and Akira class cruisers, and a half-dozen hulking Galaxy and Excelsior class looming over them all at the highest docking ring. A particularly unique one, a squat starship vaguely resembling an oval with nacelles and a nose sticking out, orbited the station in a holding pattern. It took a moment of computer searching to determine that it was the U.S.S. Defiant, the personal starship of the commander of Deep Space Nine.
“We’re being hailed, Captain,” said Ishihara. True to Doctor May’s words, her hands were healed with nary a trace they’d been burned in the first place. “They’re giving us an inside docking berth.”
“Very well,” Liang replied. “Take us in, helm.”
I watched on the viewscreen as we slowly drifted in, coming closer and closer to the main mouth of the Starbase until we were swallowed up inside. There were two other starships berthed with us, one a small class I didn’t recognize, the other a Centaur-class destroyer. “Coming in to dock now,” Rodriguez said. He inched us ahead on thrusters till we sidled up to the berth and allowed the umbilicals to take hold. “Docking clamps secure, all engines at idle. Docking procedure complete, sir.”
As she did so, Ishihara said, “Message from Admiral Ross, sir. He wants to meet you and Commander Shimmer in his office immediately.”
“Tell him we’re on our way,” Liang said. “You’ve got the bridge, Drake.”
The turbolift doors at the rear of the bridge slid open, discharging Cadeneza, who rushed down towards us “Err, sir!” she spoke up before Liang and I could do more than stand. She waved a PADD clutched in one hand. “May I come with you? I have the results from the sensor log analysis.”
“Oh?” Liang arched an eyebrow. “Perfect timing. Come along then. You can explain once we arrive.”
It was a quick journey via turbolift to the docking port. Once there, we shifted our way through a couple of posted security – I gave Maia a brief wave as I passed her by – and then stepped through the tunnel into the Starbase proper.
While nowhere near the size and splendor of Earth Starbase, Starbase 375 nevertheless managed to impress me with its layout. A vast promenade spread out across three decks worth of space, with balconies and shops and restaurants dotting the alcoves and side passages. In more peaceful times civilians would likely dominate the place, shopping, eating, and passing the time before the next leg of their onward journey.
But with the war, especially at a Starbase so close to the front line as this one, civilians were few and very far between. The few shops that were open were ones most useful for a Stafleet-heavy clientele. You could taste the tension in the air, from the way everyone walked quicker than normal, to the hushed tones they seemed to speak in as they breezed by. Every few minutes a couple of security officers would rush through the crowd with phaser rifles and the few people on the promenade would freeze and look around frantically, as if searching for the nearest cover.
“Wow,” Cadeneza murmured. “Not a fun crowd, huh?”
Liang frowned as we meandered through. “No, I daresay not, Lieutenant.”
“Can’t blame them,” I said as I drew closer to both Liang and Cadeneza. Even now, several months after I’d returned from Veridian III, crowds like this left me uneasy. Even with the reduced civilian presence, so many people in one place made me… nervous.
Fortunately for my mental health, we soon turned off the promenade and down a side hallway that was lined with as many corners as security officers. When we arrived at the Admiral’s office, Liang tapped the door chime with his cane.
“Enter!” came a call.
We strode in, finding Admiral Ross seated at a desk in a plain unadorned room, the lone exception being a United Federation of Planets flag that hung off a flagpole in one of the corners. But he wasn’t alone. A Captain I didn’t immediately recognize, a human with dark skin, a bald head, and a mustache and goatee sat opposite the Admiral in one of the chairs before the desk. He eyed us curiously, his gaze landing on me for several moments. His eyes projected gentle kindness and stone cold determination at the same time. The only thing I knew for sure in that brief moment was this was not a man to be trifled with.
“Ah, my apologies, Admiral, I did not realize you were in a meeting,” Liang said, stiffening to attention.
“No need to worry, we were just finishing up,” Ross said as he stood up from behind his desk, prompting the other Captain to join him. “This is Captain Benjamin Sisko, of the Defiant.”
“Captain James Liang.” Liang held out a hand for Sisko to shake. “And this is my first officer, Commander Sunset Shimmer, and my chief science officer, Lieutenant Jacqueline Cadeneza.”
“A pleasure, Captain,” Sisko said as he shook Liang’s hand, his mouth spreading in a wide grin, showing off perfect pearly white teeth. “Your missions were always a favorite of mine for reading at the Academy.”
Liang chuckled. “So I’ve heard. A shame about Deep Space Nine, by the way. Giving up the station must not have been easy.”
“Oh, we’ll take it back,” Sisko replied, his eyes narrowing. “I don’t intend to let the Dominion occupy our front doorstep for long.”
Sisoko’s words almost floored me. Not for what he said, but for how he said it. Nearly every word felt as heavy as it sounded in his smooth yet incredibly deep baritone. Captain Liang was an imposing man himself, but Sisko? If someone told me he could command the gods themselves, I’d believe it.
“Captain Sisko was just about to get underway, rejoining the Seventh fleet,” Ross said, giving Sisko a pointed look.
Sisko nodded to the Admiral. “If only we had the time, Captain,” he said.
“Oh I’m sure we’ll find some time one of these days,” Liang replied. “Give the Jem’Hadar hell for us.”
Sisko’s grin turned savage. “I intend to. Excuse me.” With one last lingering glance my way, Sisko departed.
“Have a seat,” Ross ordered, gesturing to the chairs. Once we sat, he focused his attention squarely on Liang. “I take it by the fact your science officer is with you that you finally have an answer as to how those Jem’Hadar fighters snuck up on you.”
“It appears we do, Admiral,” Liang replied. “Lieutenant, if you would?”
Cadeneza cleared her throat. “Um, right. So, err, sir, I’ve been running an analysis of the sensor logs over the past three days. If I may?” She gestured to the Admiral’s wall screen with her PADD.
“By all means,” Ross said.
She tapped a few keys on her PADD and the screen lit up with a display of sensor readings, graphs of waves and particles and so on. “So at first, there was nothing to see.” She tapped another key and started up a timeline. “Here’s where the ships first show up. You can see it in the sensor readings. One moment, there’s nothing present. No subspace signatures, no polaran energy, nothing. The next, they’ve all dropped out of warp and are firing on us.”
“It’s a damned good thing we kept the shields up.” Liang shook his head and sighed. “If we hadn’t, I fear their first blow might’ve been a fatal one.”
“They certainly tried,” Cadeneza agreed, pulling up one particular sensor readout showcasing the Jem’Hadar weapons impacting the Phoenix’s shields. “Their initial fire was aimed right at our warp core. Once they realized the shields were already activated, they switched up to other targets.”
Ross nodded, his lips thinning. “I’ve reviewed the initial reports from the Phoenix, Lieutenant, so you can skip ahead.”
“Of course, sir,” Cadeneza said, a note of irritation entering her voice. A glare from me got her to stifle it right quick. “It took a great deal of sensor analysis to finally pick up the trick they used.” She altered the display to showcase a graph. “Here’s the energy reading the Phoenix’s sensors were picking up just moments before the Jem’Hadar showed up. Looks just simple background radiation, right? Until you compare it to these.” With a flourish she brought up another pair of graphs. Both appeared remarkably similar to the first, but with a few minor differences.
“What are they?” I asked.
“These,” Cadeneza answered, her eyes twinkling, “are the energy signatures of a Klingon Bird of Prey and a Romulan Warbird when they decloak.”
The atmosphere in the room dropped ten degrees. Admiral Ross’s reply was frosty and clipped. “Are you suggesting the Jem’Hadar have developed cloaking technology?”
“No, I’m not, sir, and that’s just it,” Cadeneza replied. “If it was as simple as that, I would’ve figured it out within a few hours. No, these Jem’Hadar didn’t have cloaking devices. But they were cloaked. In a sense.”
Ross drew himself up and adjusted his uniform, then gazed back at Cadeneza with a steely-eyed look “I hope you have an explanation, Lieutenant.”
“I do.” She stared down at her PADD for a moment and thumbed through a number of graphs before clearing the display and pulling up an entirely new set of graphs. “We all know the bare basics of cloaking technology. A form of gravitational lensing is used to deflect light and energy away from a ship, somewhat similar to the effect a black hole has on light that passes near it.”
“Hold on,” I said, holding up a hoof. “I think I see where you’re going with this, but I don’t see how it solves this particular scenario. Black holes do shift light, but you’d have to get so close you’d risk crossing the event horizon, and any ship that does that is lost forever. I guess it could work at a distance if a ship used a single angle of approach, but even then, starships don’t just rely on visual sensors to find things. Surely one of the other sensors would’ve picked up their energy signature at least–”
“Not if there’s more than one black hole,” Cadeneza said. A smug expression formed on her face. “I didn’t see it at first either, Sunset, but your sister figured it out. Take a closer look at what I’ve got here.”
I peered at the screen. “Uh, looks like the energy patterns of a black hole. Or several black holes, like three or four.”
“Try closer to twenty,” Cadeneza countered.
Liang snapped his fingers at once. “Of course! The Bouman Basin!” Catching sight of Ross’s glare, Liang continued, “The Bouman Basin is an unusual stellar phenomena, about fifteen lightyears from the where the Phoenix was attacked. It’s one of the only known examples of a system with such a high concentration of black holes.”
Ross’s brow furrowed. “I thought black holes merged over time. How is it this field hasn’t?”
“It’s in the process, sir,” Cadeneza said, “but only over an immense time scale. Not long from now, cosmologically speaking, these black holes will merge into a happy little, singular, stellar black hole, roughly about fifty solar masses in size. But right now they’re all separate very small while they erratically orbit each other in a remarkably chaotic display. I have some theories but, from a purely scientific perspective, it is absolutely fascinating.”
“And the Bouman Basin lies just outside Federation space, right along the Cardassian border,” I finished, nodding in understanding. “So if they came directly from there…”
“As long as they parked themselves relatively behind the Basin, with so many black holes orbiting each other… their warp signatures would have been lensed, distorted, and likely arrive far too late for it to matter. And that's if we could even find them with all the radiation from the accretion discs. It isn't exactly a cloak, but would function as one. Likely, if we had stayed longer, we may have picked up their jumbled signatures at some point. Could have been anywhere between a day and century though,” Cadeneza said.
Ross eyed each of us in turn, then nodded. “So it sounds like the Dominion’s deliberately using this Bouman Basin to disguise raids into Federation space. That would explain the raid before yours and the one that happened just a few hours ago.”
“There was another one, sir?” I said, struggling not to gasp.
Biting his lip, Ross tapped at his terminal and switched up the screen to showcase a set of destroyed convoys and a Galaxy-class starship with one of its nacelles sheared off and a gaping scar along its secondary hull that went all the way up the ship’s neck into the saucer. “The Venture was escorting a supply convoy when it was ambushed by several raiders. They managed to survive, but were unable to save any of the supply ships. We’ve got the Crusader, the Hammerhead, and the Voltaire all on their way to tug it back to spacedock.”
“Holy shit,” Cadeneza whispered. “Are they going to be able to fix her?”
“They will,” Ross confirmed. “We’ll have the Venture back in service soon enough. But they were damned lucky to survive. Their shields weren’t at full strength when the fighters hit them.”
“Is it possible they have a base out there?” I wondered.
Cadeneza shook her head. “Maybe a small fuel depot, but even that’s unlikely, to be honest. The gravitational forces in an area like the Basin would require any station to run some extremely powerful thrusters, not to mention the constant tracking of the blackholes' orbits.. They’d likely use up most of their fuel supply just keeping themselves out of the black holes. At most, you're likely looking at a single ship operating as a base with a small crew that is never not working.”
I nodded in understanding. “Yeah, that’s a good point.”
“So, if there is something there, it sounds like it can be easily taken out,” Ross concluded. “I’ll dispatch someone from the Seventh fleet. Might be a good job for the Defiant.”
“Sir, respectfully, I’d like to request the Phoenix join them on that mission,” Liang said. “Even if the base is small, we don’t have any idea of what kind of defenses it may have, or how many ships may be guarding it. And we both know the Phoenix has no assignment at present.”
Ross steepled his hands and cast a deadpan glare at Liang. “And we both know why the Phoenix has to stay away from the front lines too.”
He didn’t have to say it aloud for us to know he was referring to me. “Due respect, sir, this isn’t that close to the front lines,” I pointed out. I floated Cadeneza’s PADD out of her hand and tapped a few keys, pulling up a star map. “See, the main battle lines are here, here, and here, near Bajor and Chin’Toka. The Bouman Basin is well outside that, and on our side of the lines besides.”
“You saw what these raiders did to the Phoenix and the Venture,” Liang chimed in. “No offense to Captain Sisko, but do you want to risk a ship as unique as the Defiant on something like this, without proper backup?”
“The Defiant is fully capable of handling itself in almost any fight,” Ross replied, his voice laced with steel. Then he sighed. “But I see your point.” He tapped his badge. “Ross to Ops.”
“Ops here, sir.”
“Do we have an estimate on the Phoenix repairs yet?”
After a moment’s silence, the response came through, “Yes sir. Looks like we’ll have them underway in eighteen hours.”
“Good. Ross out.” He turned back to us. “Very well. I’ll recall the Defiant, and order it, plus the Phoenix, to investigate the Bouman Basin. You’ll get under way in two days. I’ll be putting Captain Sisko in command on the mission.”
A cold chill filled the room as Liang sat forward. His expression didn’t change a millimeter, but he nevertheless commanded attention. “May I ask why, sir?”
“Experience fighting the Dominion,” Ross replied frostily. “And, you’re still out of practice. I hear what you’re saying, Captain, and frankly? I don’t care. You have your orders.” He glared at each of us then gestured to the door. “Dismissed.”
Liang rose at once, nodded stiffly, then whirled on his heel to leave, the two of us trailing behind. Only once we were well outside Ross’s office did Liang speak. “I am tired of being treated like I am incapable.”
“Permission to speak freely, sir?” I said.
He gave a flippant wave of his hand. “Granted.”
“I don’t think that’s what they’re doing, sir,” I said.
“No?” Liang scowled down at me for a long moment, then his gaze softened. “No, you’re right, Sunset. If they didn’t find me capable, they never would’ve asked me to return to Starfleet.”
“Exactly!” Cadeneza chimed in. I watched her come bare centimeters from smacking Liang on the shoulder before she caught herself, a faint blush on her cheeks. “Err, sir.”
Liang glanced back at her and grinned. “Well, I suppose I should take what they give me, rather than argue. Let’s return to the ship. We have some repairs to oversee, and my first officer has a counseling session she needs to attend.” He looked back at me and pointed at me with his cane. “I want that resolved before we depart, understood, Number One?”
“Err… I’ll do my best, sir,” I replied, scratching the back of my head and laughing sheepishly.
He patted me on the withers. “I expect nothing less.”
My head pounded like a heavy metal artist performing a drum solo, my tongue lolling in my mouth like a dried out piece of jerky. I cracked open my eyes, wincing at the light piercing through. “Uuugh… turn it off, Preta.”
“Sorry, Twilight,” Preta said, her voice loud enough for me to slap my ears down to block it out. “You’ve got to get up.”
“Mrgh. No. No I don’t.” I squeezed my eyes shut and threw the blanket over my head to cut out the light. “My shift doesn’t… doesn’t begin for another four hours…”
“Twilight.” Preta’s voice turned rebuking, almost harsh, or as harsh as the sweet adorable Caitian ever became anyway. “You know you’ve got that meeting with your sister and the counselors.”
I clapped my hooves around my face and curled up into a ball. “Nooooooo,” I whined.
Preta let out a low feline growl and promptly threw the blanket off the bed, leaving me exposed. “Twilight, you are acting like a spoiled kitten,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest. “Get up.”
Moaning, I opened my eyes just enough to look up at her, wincing at the disapproval in her eyes. “But my head hurts.”
She continued to glare at me for a few moments before she let out a sigh and plopped herself down beside me. She wrapped a fuzzy arm around my shoulder and pulled me up against her. “Twilight, I know what the problem really is. I wouldn’t be a good friend if I let you hide away from this. You need to reconcile with Sunset.”
Not for the first time I found myself blushing as she held me. I don’t know why. Maybe it was just how… touchy feely she was. Equestrians are pretty free with hugs… at least, I think we are, if I can trust my old memories… but she made ponies look like Puritan prudes with how freely she hugged and cuddled and nuzzled.
“I don’t want to,” I replied petulantly, burying my head into her side. “Sunset’s a jerk.”
Preta let out a quiet murr of a sigh, then ran her hand through my mane, gently tapping her fingers on my head in just the right way to ease some of the hangover pressure. “You know that’s not true, Twilight. She cares for you. I can see it, smell it even. Every time she sees you, she’s filled with sisterly love.”
“If she loved me so much why can’t she see the pain I went through, that I’m still going through?” I tried to scowl as she rubbed me, but Preta was too good with the massage. She and Wattson both. I swear sometimes the two compared notes. Or maybe they both just like the excuse of petting me like a dog.
...I didn’t mind it.
Preta gave me a quick squeeze around the middle. “Why don’t you ask her that question instead of me, hmm?”
“Damn you, Preta,” I murmured. “Why are you so reasonable?”
She let out that mewling purr of a laugh I liked so much and pressed her fingers under my chin to make me look up at her. “Because you’re my friend and I care about you, silly.” She tousled my hair, then got up off the bed and pointed at the head. “Now, why don’t you take a shower. I’ll get something ready for you to eat when you get out.” Then she snapped her fingers. “Wait, one second.”
She hopped over to the replicator and asked for a small cup of what was officially a Federation Emergency Rehydration Solution Beverage, and what most reasonable people, myself included, called hangover cure juice. “Here,” she said, handing it to me. “Drink this before you go in.”
Knocking back the juice in one shot, I shot her more than a few dirty looks, her laughter following me into the shower and ringing in my ears till I emerged. The combination of hot steam and ultrasonics did wonders for my state of mind, though I was still pretty dehydrated. But that’s what breakfast was for. She’d prepared my usual preference of eggs, a grain–in this case, grits– and some coffee.
I dunked it back before I touched anything else, letting it work its magic. Science. Whatever. It did the job and helped me bounce back from the hangover in a jiffy. “Thanks,” I said as I began stuffing my face with food.
Preta winked. “Sure thing, Twilight.” Then a beep sounded through the cabin and she winced at her terminal. “And I’m on duty in five minutes. Gotta run!” She hurried over to her terminal and picked up her PADD, then scurried for the door. She paused just as it opened to look back over her shoulder. “Please don’t hide back in your room, Twilight. I mean it. You need to do this.”
Then she was gone.
I considered ignoring her right then. I could’ve headed back into my quarters, slept for four hours, and gone to my shift with few regrets. Even if I did care about making up with Sunset, it’s not like it’d work out. She’d just hide behind that uniform and throw her command authority in my face like she always does whenever I’m around.
But… I would’ve made Preta unhappy. Worse, she’d be disappointed. Upset! Outraged, even! And that, that I couldn’t do. I couldn’t make my best friend unhappy with me!
...wait… when did Preta become my best friend…?
Shaking my head to clear the thought, I gulped down the rest of my food in a hurry, then went to fix my uniform, making sure not to leave a single wrinkle or a single hair out of place in my mane. I’d be professional. Composed. For Preta’s sake.
Gathering my PADD, I called out to the computer. “Time?”
“1337.”
My counseling session was at 1345, so I needed to hurry. I rushed out the door, down to the nearest turbolift, and barked my destination. I tried to ignore a few of the looks I got from some of my fellow crewmates as I galloped past them.
I arrived at Belle’s with moments to spare, and took a moment to recompose myself, using my magic to whisk away any signs of sweat. Then, planting a confident smile on my muzzle, I entered.
Inside I found not Belle, as I expected, but Innana. She sat poised in a chair nestled under one of the windows, outside of which I could see the innards of Starbase 375. Two Equestrian-designed chairs sat in front of her, facing each other. Quiet music filled the air, chimes and soft drum beats, something Arabian in sound. A pleasant scent filled the air, from a sprig of burning incense laying on a table.
And Sunset was already sitting in one of the chairs, perched up with her head raised high, her wings folded, like she was posing for a picture. Or for a statue. The sight set my teeth on edge.
“Please, come in Twilight,” Innana said, her accent weaving its way into my ears to relax me, like it always did. “Sit down. I am sorry that Belle could not be here, but she is busy on the station with important affairs.”
“Hey Twi,” Sunset said with a smile and a wave.
“...hi.” I hopped up onto the proffered chair and gave Sunset a patently insincere smile. That tore hers off her stupid muzzle.
Innana favored me with a curious look, but said nothing about it. “So, I believe you both know why you are here. We need to resolve the issues between you two.”
“What for?” I asked, glaring Sunset’s way. “Sunset doesn’t care what I think. She’s–”
“Twilight.” Innana didn’t raise her voice, but the command cut through me sharper than a bat’leth. “Barbs and personal attacks will not help matters. I am here to mediate. This will not become another shouting match like the one in Ten-Forward.”
“...fine.” I shifted back in my chair, and leaned my forelegs over the arm.
Innana nodded. “Good. Now then, I will give Sunset leave to speak first. Let’s hear what she has to say. Sunset?”
Sunset cringed, her eyes fluttering as she took a deep breath. “Alright. Let’s cut to the chase, Twilight. You didn’t actually answer my question the other day. What did I do wrong?”
“Alright. I think that is a reasonable question,” Innana said. She turned to me. “Twilight? Can you answer that?”
I scoffed. “What did you do wrong?” I shook my head and snorted for all I was worth, my nostrils flaring like crazy. “What the hell do you think, Sunset? You left us. You abandoned us. You abandoned me. You were the one connection I had left to Equestria, and then you were gone. And I know why. I get it. I get you did what you had to do.”
“That’s what I don’t understand,” Sunset joined in, her expression unreadable. “If you get that I did what I had to do… why are you still mad? Why did you say what you did?”
“What, that I wish you were still dead?” A bitter laugh escaped me. “Because it’s true.”
Sunset took in a sharp breath. Her muzzle trembled, eyes turning misty. “But… why? Don’t you… don’t you love me? I’m your sister. Mother and Mom don’t have this problem.”
“See? See?! That!” I jabbed a hoof in her direction. “That right there is a huge part of it! Of course they accepted you back. You’ve always been their first, the one they cared about the most!”
Sunset’s lips pulled back, the mistiness flashing away as her eyes lit up with anger. “Excuse you? What the hell, Twilight? They care about us equally. They always have! Don’t pull this ‘oh I’m not the favored one’ bullshit–”
“Sunset Shimmer!” Innana raised her voice now, just a touch, but it was like she’d slammed Sunset upside the head with the back end of a shuttlecraft. “You must tone down the hostility. I realize what she is saying is hurtful, but these feelings must be expressed if you are to sort this out.”
“Right… right. Sorry.” Sunset took a few breaths and untensed her muscles, relaxing in her chair. “Sorry. But I really don’t understand where you’re coming from with this, Twilight.”
“Yeah, I gathered that,” I said dryly. “But you didn’t see what they were like when you were gone. You didn’t spend hours arguing with them over how pointless it was to leave your room untouched. You didn’t spend countless hours alone in your room trying to study while they were downstairs interviewing one artist after another to commission that portrait of you! You know how much latinum they spent on that portrait? Twenty bars. Twenty. Bars. It’s a good painting, but come on! I wouldn’t have spent that much on a painting of Princess Celestia for crying out loud! They didn’t want to accept that you were gone.”
“But I wasn’t!” Sunset’s wings flared, though she otherwise stayed relaxed.
“And we had no way to know that, Sunset!” I fired back. “Look, I get it. Remote planet, no technology, no reason for Starfleet to look for survivors on the surface either. And even I’ll acknowledge that surviving long enough to send a distress signal at all is impressive. But you have to understand. There was literally no reason to even imagine you were still alive. None.”
Sunset stared at the floor for a moment, but seemed to take that in stride. “That’s… a fair point. If the tables were turned I’d have assumed you were dead too.”
Inanna smiled at us both. “Good. You have found something you can agree on.”
“Right, yeah,” Sunset said, nodding. She turned back to me. “Okay, so we’ve got that settled, but it still doesn’t answer my real question. Why is it so bad that I came back?”
I could almost feel the bucket of ice cold water being dumped on the single mote of light we’d managed to find between us. “Because you were already gone,” I pointed out. “And I accepted that. Mom and Mother didn’t for the longest time, but I did. It hurt. But I dealt with it. Maybe I’ve changed a bit since then–”
“That’s an understatement, to be honest,” Sunset quipped. “Before I died, you were smiling all the time, Twilight. You were blazing through your studies, even better than I did. You had friends at the Academy, a family at home, and all the motivation in the world. You were happy. And now?” She laughed, one so bitter it made me gag from the taste of it.
“Now I don’t know what to think. You’re short with everyone, and that’s before throwing an insubordinate fit every time I ask you the simplest question. And now you’re drowning your issues in booze instead of talking to someone about it? I’m not sure how you kept that up and still made valedictorian, but you and I both know that kind of shit’s not going to fly on any starship, wartime or not. I’ve been rough on you because I’ve been trying to keep you out of the brig!”
Innana stood up and held her arms out between us. “Sunset,” she hissed. “You need to restrain yourself.”
“No, she doesn’t.” I hopped up out of my chair and flashed Sunset a toothy fake grin. “‘Cause she’s right. Sooner or later I’ll end up in the brig. But you know what? That’s a good thing. ‘Cause maybe our parents’ll finally pay attention to me. Maybe if I get transferred to a different ship, I’ll get to figure out my own path in life. ‘Cause maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to do something on my own instead of just following what you’ve laid out for me!”
I raised a hoof as if to slap Sunset across the face. “You were wrong from the very beginning, Sunset. Things can be a whole lot worse than being stuck in this damn world. I wish I’d never come here at all!”
I turned tail and ran. I ran as fast as I could, galloping out the door and down the corridor. I poured my essence into running away, far away, as I nearly rounded the entire saucer before only finally ducking into a turbolift and ordering it to take me to deck eleven. Once down there I found the closest holodeck, booted up the Canterlot program, and threw myself inside.
I found myself galloping through the corridors of Canterlot Castle, headed straight for the throne room. As usual for the program, Celestia was in the middle of Day Court, listening to a petition. I ignored the shouts of guards as I threw open the doors and barreled my way to the throne, shoving the bespoked suit and monocle wearing petitioner aside.
Princess Celestia rose from her throne, curiosity etched across her face. “What is the meaning of this intrusion, Twilight?” she asked. “You know I’m willing to–”
“Where’s the mirror?!” I shouted, cutting her off.
Celestia blinked. “The mirror?”
“Yes, damn it! The mirror!” I stomped a furious hoof into the tile hard enough to crack it. “Where is it? What is it? How does it work?”
“Twilight, my trusted student, I don’t understand–”
“Rrrgh!” I stomped a hoof again as my magic flared, adding force enough to crack several additional tiles all around the impact zone. “Tell me why! Why does it exist? Why didn’t you stop me from being taken? Why didn’t you try to rescue me? Why didn’t you send someone through to rescue me? Why?!”
“Twilight Sparkle!” Celestia thundered, her own magic surging to life as she spread her massive wings in a gesture that demanded obedience. “You will cease this at once–”
“Just tell me!” I screamed, my throat raw from the magic enhancing my voice.
To my shock, instead of saying anything, the holographic Celestia shook her head sadly, then her eyes glowed white. Magic swaddled me in its embrace, and in a flash my surroundings shifted to just outside the castle gates.
“You… you stupid… damned… hologram!” I cried as I turned tail and ran aimlessly through the streets, barreling my way through crowds of ponies, picking them up and hurling them out of my path until I finally reached one of the many parks dotting the city. Only then did I collapse and allow myself to weep.
After a couple of moments, though, a pair of deep voices coughed for attention. Scowling, I looked up to see a pair of pegasi, one a white pure as snow, the other black as coal. Both wore the armor of the Equestrian Royal Guard, complete with wing blades and deep expressions of contempt on their faces. “Excuse you, but we’ve had reports of a unicorn in strange clothes throwing ponies around?”
“Oh you have got to be kidding me,” I sighed. “Computer, delete guards.”
The guards remained firmly in place, their glares darker than ever. One pointed his blades squarely at my face. “You need to come with us. We have questions for you.”
A frisson of fear ran down my spine. “Computer!” I called out. “Delete. Guards.”
“I don’t know what you’re saying,” spoke the black one, now also pointing his blades at me. “But don’t move. We will use force if necessary.”
“Computer…” I growled. “Computer! Respond!” Nothing. “Oh come on! We’re in spacedock for crying out loud. This is not the time for holographic safeties to–”
One of the pegasi guards leapt on me, knocking me to the ground. “That’s it. Cuff her, Anthracite. We’ll sort this out in the dungeon.”
“Really.” I let out a loud groan. “This is ridiculous. You are holograms, you’re not going to–ow!”
One of them smacked me across the muzzle. He smacked me. Hard enough to draw blood, even. “Shut up, you crazy mare.”
My blood flash-boiled, sublimating till it ran hotter than a star’s corona. “Oh I am not putting up with this!” I roared as my magic flared to life, hauling the white pegasus off me and throwing him into his buddy, sending them sprawling. “I’m not going to sit here while my own goddamned program tries to arrest me!”
I galloped away from the pegasi, heading northeast towards the Noble District, where I’d previously spent extra time filling in as much of my old neighborhood as I could remember. As I ran, the pegasi took off in pursuit, their wing blades humming dangerously as they flew after me. “Cease at once!” one of them cried. “You have assaulted a member of the Royal Guard! If you do not surrender we will use lethal force!”
“Hah, funny,” I shouted back, “I don’t remember Equestria being so eager to use force like that! Must be an oversight from Sunset’s programming.” Then I grinned. “Actually, I know it is! I combed the code myself, you know. I saw what she did for your code. She took a basic police force program, one used in tens of thousands of different programs, and wrote some basic scripting over it. She probably never expected someone to trigger you into responding.”
In lieu of a verbal reply, one of the pegasi reached into his armor and pulled out a pair of bolas, swinging it around with his mouth till he sent it hurtling my way. My magic reached out to deflect it, knocking it aside easily.
I skidded to a halt when I reached my old family street. Holographic citizens milled about, more than a few screeching in panic when they saw the Royal Guard chasing me. When I looked back I saw the two I’d been dealing with were joined by three others swooping down out of the sky. They formed a circle around me, extending out their wings so I couldn’t escape. “Stop right there, unicorn,” said the first one. “You’re surrounded. Give up.”
“Nah. I don’t think so.” I charged up my hooves with magical force, a savage grin splitting my muzzle. “I’ve got a lot of emotions to work out right now. And you know what? I feel like working them out on you.”
The pegasus opened his muzzle to respond, but I didn’t give him a chance. I charged, whirled, and performed a sharp twin-hooved buck to the face, sending him to the dirt. I didn’t hold back on the force either, deliberately charging through the impact enough to snap his neck. He was a hologram. He wasn’t real.
“Lethal force authorized!” screeched another as the four remaining pegasi descended upon me. In a whirl of blades they came at me from all sides, slicing through the air in patterns that guaranteed my death, or would have had I not been trained for this sort of thing. My instincts flared to life, summoning up shields to knock their blows aside as I focused on one, lifting him in my magic high up and then deliberately imparting ten times the force as I slammed him to the ground with a horrendous multi-layered crack!
Laughter escaped my muzzle as I dodged and weaved through another set of attacks, though one of them broke through enough to tackle me to the ground. He raised his wing blades, ready to thrust into me, but I rolled over quick enough to end up on top of him, then brought both forehooves down square on his throat.
Ignoring his gasping and choking I turned to the remaining two, who seemed much more wary of me now that I’d disposed of three of them. “What’s the matter, huh? The big bad Royal Guard can’t even take down a single pony in the middle of the street?” I taunted, holding up one forehoof to beckon them forward. “Bring it.”
One of them immediately took flight and soared away while the other kept his gaze locked squarely on me, his muscles coiled and ready to strike. “Oooh, look, your friend ran away,” I said, giggling. “He must’ve been too scared!”
An odd wheezing noise somewhere behind me caught my attention for a split second, just long enough for him to spot my distracted focus and charge at me, blades ready. I ducked under his first strike and parried the second with a shield spell, then fired off a few blows of my own with my forehooves, lashing out more like a human would punch with their fist than a pony would normally act.
It took him by surprise, one blow catching his jaw as he tried to back away. “Oh no you don’t!” I cackled as I grabbed him up in my magic, ready to break him in half.
“Oh computer! Freeze program, why don’t you?”
The battle furor that surged through me evaporated in an instant, leaving me half-frozen, half shaking as I turned around to see Captain Liang himself standing behind me, leaning forward on his cane with both arms. “Ah, Ensign Sparkle,” he said. “I see this is how you enjoy your recreation. A bit violent, wouldn’t you say? What were you about to do to that poor fellow?”
I blinked, letting my magic fade as I glanced around at the bodies surrounding me. The bodies. Broken, battered, one split open on his side in a way that caused me to avert my eyes. Any sense of glee or joy left me. My stomach churned, twisted up in knots as I gaped at what I’d done. “I… sir… I didn’t… I don’t…”
He shook his head once and clicked his tongue. “No, Ensign, I was watching. You see, I was the one who temporarily disabled the safeties. I wanted to see how you’d react after your counseling session. Judging by… this… I don’t suppose it went well, did it?”
I stiffened to attention, despite a desperate, surging desire to flop onto my side and cry. “N-no sir. No, it didn’t.” My knees wobbled as I, without really wanting to, glanced at the bodies again. “I’m sorry, sir, this was unbecoming–”
He held up two fingers for silence. He stared at me for a couple of moments, studying me, then picked up his cane and poked at one of the bodies. “You know, I’ve seen much worse than this, when some of my crew loses their temper in the holodeck,” he said. “We had one of the earliest models aboard the Fletcher. Wasn’t even called a holodeck then. Was more of a 'combat training suite'. They didn’t start calling them holodecks till the 2360s.”
Liang paused for a moment while he circled around me, giving the floating guard a cursory look before returning his gaze to me. “Lieutenant Zhidar was a bit of a hot head at the time, and something deeply upset him. Doesn’t matter what, but when he got the chance, he came down to the training suite and he tore apart a good dozen or more people. Varying races, humans, Vulcans, a couple Klingons. Made a massive mess everywhere. He was covered in their blood.”
“That’s…” I choked, slapping a hoof to my mouth to keep from vomiting. “That’s horrific, sir.”
“It is.” He shrugged. “But he felt much better afterwards, and there was no harm done to anyone real. Holograms are just that, Ensign: holograms. Unless one somehow develops sapience, which I can assure you none of these,” he pointed to the corpses of pegasi surrounding me, “ever would, you needn’t feel any guilt. Though I would also encourage you to tread lightly. Last thing we want to do is feed mania, if you catch my drift.”
“...I see, sir,” I mumbled, unsure what else to say, how to react. I was still so shocked by the thought that the Captain–the CAPTAIN–had witnessed me losing it to the point of homicidal rage.
He chuckled, then tucked his cane under his arm and approached me, squatting down to look me in the eye. “I can tell from what I’ve seen of both you and Sunset that there’s a lot more going on between you than I first suspected. As your Captain, allow me to be blunt: I need to be sure this will not interfere in your duties, or the duties of my first officer. If you cannot contain your feelings, I will have you transferred to another ship at once. Is that clear, Ensign?”
I gulped, nodding like a bobblehead. “Yes sir.”
“Good. Now that that’s out of the way… I’m also ordering regular counseling sessions for you both. Twice weekly on your own, once weekly together. I’m sure Miss Hendrix and Miss Eresh can make that work. Understand this is not optional, nor can you run out on these sessions as you did today. This is a requirement for both of you to keep your positions aboard my ship.”
I nodded again, my teeth chattering. “Right sir. I understand, sir.”
He nodded in return. “I hope so. One more tidbit for you, before I leave you to your recreation: Your sister chose to have you posted to this ship. It was the very first thing she requested when she was assigned the Phoenix restoration project. The two of you have a unique opportunity, Miss Sparkle. A second chance at life in every meaning of the word.” Liang looked past me, his gaze very far away for just a second. “Don’t waste it.”
Clicking his cane on the ground once, he turned and left the holodeck. As he stepped through the doors, the program faded around me, returning to the black room with gold lines. I’m not sure how long I stood there, shaking from a combination of shame, misplaced rage at whoever I felt deserved it, and fear. I didn’t want to lose this position. All my friends were on this ship. I liked this ship. I needed this ship if I ever want to have a chance at getting home. The only bad part was Sunset, and she…
She…
...I shook my head and sighed. “I don’t know what to think anymore,” I murmured as I trotted out the holodeck doors.
I stared, gaping, at the doors that slammed shut in Twilight’s wake. My heart stilled in my chest as my whole body came to a halt, unable to process what she’d just said. Twilight… hates it here?
Twilight?
Hates her friends? Mom? Mother? Me?
It wasn’t possible. It couldn’t be possible.
“Sunset?”
I jumped almost a full meter in the air at the touch of Inanna’s hand on my shoulder. “What?”
She gave me an unreadable look, then pointed at my chair. “Please sit back down, Sunset.”
I did as requested, plopping down backwards as my rear knees collapsed out from under me. The material of the chair met my skin, but I barely felt it. My mind still couldn’t process what I’d heard. “She hates me,” I breathed.
Inanna took hold of one of my forehooves, running her fingers along the front part of the toe, the same way Belle used to in my more panicky moments of my first few years on Earth. The familiar gesture helped center me, enough to bring me back to the moment. “I am sorry it turned out that way, Sunset,” Inanna said. “For what it is worth, I do not think she truly hates you, or anyone else for that matter. I think she has convinced herself she does because she misunderstands what you’ve been through and why. From her perspective, you–”
“Yeah, save it, Inanna,” I interrupted. I pulled my hoof away from her. “Look, not that I don’t appreciate it, but I just had my little sister basically tell me she hates me, our - my - parents, and sound completely sincere doing it. I don’t want to hear the psychobabble bullshit.”
If that comment stung at all, she didn’t show it. She merely blinked, then nodded and said. “As you wish. Then may I make another suggestion? If being here is not helpful right now, perhaps you should speak with those who are friends with both you and Twilight.”
“...you mean Cadeneza and Wattson,” I said after a moment.
“Yes.”
“...fine.” I hopped out of my chair again. “Fine… I’ll… I’ll go find them.”
Before I could reach the door, Inanna held out a hand. “Sunset, please do not make any rash decisions.”
Scowling, I looked back and said, “I’m not going to hurt myself or anything. Worst I’ll do is get drunk or stoned while off duty. Unlike some ponies I actually have a sense of self-control.”
Inanna let out a gentle sigh and smiled at me. “Of course. Forgive me. It is a counselor’s job to worry.”
“Uh huh.” I turned and left, heading for the nearest turbolift. I stopped by my quarters just long enough to catch my breath and send communiques to Cadeneza and Wattson before returning to the bridge.
The rest of my shift passed by in a blur. I gave orders, signed PADDs, and all the rest. But I barely paid attention to any of it. My mind was constantly twisting itself in knots trying to absorb Twilight’s words.
By the time my shift ended and I slumped down to my quarters, I wasn’t too surprised to find Cadeneza and Wattson already in there, hard at work destroying a bottle of rum. “You know,” I grumbled as I made my way in to sit next to them, “just because I invited you doesn’t give you the right to enter without me being home.”
“Eh.” Wattson slid an isolinear chip across the table to me, one I knew belonged inside my door panel. “Your lock is too easy to undo, Sunny.”
I shot her a flat look. “Just pour me some of that rum, okay Amelia?”
Cadeneza snickered. “Wow. Guess some shit really hit the fan, huh?”
I waited until I had a glass in front of me and I’d taken a sip before replying, “Yeah. Things started okay, kind of. We even finally reached agreement on the idea that it was only fair for Twi to assume I was dead, since I’d have done the same thing in her place.”
“But?” Wattson asked before sipping her own drink.
“But she pivoted right to blaming our parents for apparently ignoring her and not letting me go, then me for ruining her plans, and finished by saying she hates everything here and wishes she never came here at all.”
Both of them dropped their glasses to the table and gave me matching shocked looks. “You can’t be serious,” Wattson breathed.
“I wish I wasn’t serious.” I let the next mouthful of rum rest on my tongue before I swallowed, savoring the spicy sweet flavor of cinnamon and cloves. “She ran off right in the middle of our counseling session. No clue where she went.”
“And you just let her run?” Cadeneza knocked back her entire glass, then reached down to her feet and brought up two other bottles, one of vodka, the other of butterscotch. She proceeded to mix all three into her glass, gave it a stir, then sipped at it and nodded. “I would’ve gone after her.”
“I was too surprised by what she said.” I drained my glass then made my own cocktail to sip. I took this one sparingly, as I’d realized this was all real alcohol, no synthehol. Not that Cadeneza would ever put up with the fake crap anyway.
“Yeah, guess you would be,” Cadeneza said.
I took another taste of my drink. The combination of flavors had quickly turned cloying, almost too happy for my mood. “Look, you’re her friends too, right?”
“Yeah,” Wattson replied. “We took her out for drinks right after… right after your memorial service.”
Cadeneza rubbed her stomach. “Still can’t believe Maia kicked me like that. And she pulled that phaser too...”
“You started it, Jacquie,” Wattson said, inclining her glass in Cadeneza’s direction before draining it and making her own cocktail. “You were all ‘I’m gonna make you taste the floor.’”
I broke into laughter as Cadeneza’s face bloomed red. “She was trying to take Sparkie away when she needed us the most.” she groused.
“But that wasn’t the last time you took her out, I’m guessing,” I prodded.
Wattson shook her head. “Nope. She went drinking with us tons of times after that.”
“Sparkie took all the worst qualities from me, I think.” Cadeneza swirled her drink then downed it bitterly. “She just forgot to take the redeemable ones too.”
“I was wondering about that,” I said. I finished my cocktail and poured a shot of straight rum, still barely feeling more than the slightest buzz. Damned alicorn metabolism. “I told her as much. The acting out, the cold attitude to literally everyone, the constant drinking. Told her if she kept it up she’d end up in the brig.”
“And you said that to her?” Wattson’s face screwed up in disbelief. “What the hell, Sunny? No wonder she hates you.”
“Hey!” I slapped my glass down on the counter with just a bit of excessive force. “It sounded harsh but I wasn’t wrong and you know it. Whatever she thinks of me, I’m still her superior officer and she deserves to be called out on all of that.”
“Wow. You are a complete idiot.” Cadeneza rumbled with bitter laughter as she knocked back her drink, poured herself a full slug of pure vodka then knocked that back too. “God damn, Sunset. Did they take your brain in exchange for the wings?”
My hackles rose, a fire smoldering to life in my chest. “Excuse you? She’s my sister.”
“Exactly.” Cadeneza filled her glass with vodka, then gestured at me with it, sloshing liquid out onto the table. “She’s your sister. Meanin’ you oughtta be more nicer to her–" she hiccuped "– or somethin'." She frowned and clutched her stomach for a moment before shaking her head. "Look, you died, Sunset. You died. You were gone. You gotta get it through your head what that did to her.”
“I have a pretty damned good idea what that did to her, Cadeneza,” I growled as I poured myself a new shot. “I was stuck on that Celestia-forsaken planet for two years. Two. Years!”
“And you know, that sucks and all Sunny,” Wattson said, glaring at me, “but Jacquie’s right. You’re so obsessed with your own experiences that you’re not seeing what your death did to Twilight. I watched her cry. Both of us did, many times. But that was only a small fraction of her pain, believe me.”
Wattson’s glare hardened, piercing me like diamond-tipped daggers. “Preta, her roommate? She was there for the worst moments, and there were a lot of those. She’d sometimes call us over for help and her fur would be soaked through with Twilight’s tears. Even getting her to eat much less talk was a chore for weeks and weeks. We badgered her to take a month off from class, and when she came back she was so cold and isolated we had to literally drag her out of her room to get her to leave her books for more than a second.”
Cadeneza sat up in her chair. “Look, we’d be lying if we said we weren’t concerned about how quickly and easily Twilight took to alcohol. But at the time we were just happy she was outside at all.”
“...really?” I whispered. “I… I knew about some of that, but…”
“Yes, really.” Cadeneza slapped me across the shoulder with a backhand, only to end up swaying and falling out of her chair. “Ow.”
I hauled her up with my magic and placed her back into her chair. “Think you’ve had enough there, Caddy.”
“Doubtful, but whatever.” Cadeneza glared at the glass in front of her, still half full of vodka, then shoved it away and stumbled over to the replicator. “Gimme some popcorn chicken, side of chipotle buffalo sauce. Chopsticks too.” The replicator hummed as it produced the food, then she brought out the steaming plate and somehow managed to put it back on the table without falling over. “I can't believe I forgot to eat,” she moaned as she clutched her head then her stomach. “Why didn’t you remind me, ‘Melia?”
Wattson ignored her to look at me instead, her angry frown subsiding. “Sorry if we’re bein’ hard on you Sunny, but we both care about Twilight. And we care about you. It… it really sucks to see you two fighting like this.”
“For real!” Cadeneza chimed in, thrusting a chopstick in the air and waving it like a baton. “You two, like, you gotta get along.”
I looked away from them both. “You’re right,” I admitted with a shrug of my shoulders. “You’re right. I wasn’t really thinking about Twilight, at least not in the right way. But what am I supposed to do about it?”
“Eh you’ll figure it out,” Cadeneza said as she scarfed down her food. “Just think about it, okay?”
“Sure.” I looked back at them and set my drink aside, deciding I’d had enough of booze. Then a sly grin formed on my muzzle. “Hey, Cadeneza, got a question for you.”
She looked up from her plate, her mouth a mess of barbeque sauce. “What?”
“You said something pretty strange to me the other day,” I said, my smile growing. “Something about how Twilight wasn’t the one you… something.”
Wattson chortled as Cadeneza’s whole face turned as red as the barbeque sauce smeared across her lower lip. “W-what? No I didn’t,” she mumbled through a mouthful of food.
“Oh come on, Jacquie,” Wattson laughed. “Just admit it. You really want to waste your chance?”
Cadeneza groaned and dove into her food, scarfing it down for a moment or two before swallowing noisily. “Alright alright,” she murmured. “Look this… this is gonna sound pretty stupid, okay?”
I sat back in my chair and crossed my forelegs over my chest. “I’ll be the judge of that.”
She growled something under her breath, then blew a sigh out through her teeth and said, “Before you died I might’ve...sort’ve… developed a crush on you.”
Even though I’d expected a response like that, I felt my own cheeks warm up. “O-oh. A crush, huh? Not just a roll in the hay?”
“Why not both? Ain't nothing wrong with casual sex either,” Cadeneza replied, pointing a chopstick at me. Then she snorted. “Like I need to tell you that.”
I winced. “Point taken.”
“A-anyway, so, like, I kinda sorta liked you, yeah? Ain't no big thing.” Cadeneza shrugged and went back to eating.
“Huh.” I took that in, and tried to think about it. But it was difficult to process. Especially given the rest of the day's events… my brain was fried. “Okay.”
“Okay,” Cadeneza echoed. She glanced up at me furtively, a frown twisting her mouth. “I uh… we don’t gotta do anything about it. Less you wanna.”
“I don’t think this is a good time to discuss that,” Wattson cut in, placing a hand on both my shoulder and Cadeneza’s. She patted us both once, then picked up the small pile of empty bottles and dumped them all in the replicator. “We should just hang out for a while instead. We’ve got a mission to leave for tomorrow.”
Both the rum and Cadeneza’s tipsy pseudo-confession swirled in my head the rest of the night. But I had little time to really dwell on it. The next morning I was on the bridge at 0730, half an hour earlier than normal, to view the final repair status reports with Captain Liang. “Looks like the last of the repair crews have left the ship, sir,” I said. “We should be good to go.”
“Very good,” Liang said. He tapped his cane on the palm of his hand once. “Ishihara, signal Starbase our intent to depart.”
“Aye sir,” Ishihara replied. A few moments later she reported they were unlatching the umbilicals. “Umbilicals released. We’re free.”
“Helm, take us out, nice and easy,” I ordered. “Gentle with the thrusters, Mr. Rodriguez.”
“Yes ma’am,” Rodriguez replied with his usual grin.
Once out, Liang ordered, “Hail the Defiant, please.”
The grinning face of Benjamin Sisko appeared on screen. The Defiant’s bridge must have been tiny compared to ours, as I could easily see the rest of the bridge crew in the picture–including, to my surprise, a Ferengi at the helm. “Well, Captain,” he said, steepling his hands, “it seems we’ll have some time for that chat after all.”
“So it would seem,” Liang smiled back. “We’re ready to follow your lead.”
Sisko nodded. “Helm, set course for the Bouman Basin, warp eight.”
“Yes, sir!” barked the Ferengi, who I realized was wearing a cadet’s uniform, which struck me as even odder. I made a note to ask about him.
Sisko looked back up at us. “Captain, we’ll be proceeding under cloak. The Phoenix will take point on our approach.”
“Ah. We’re the bait, I take it,” Liang said with a wry chuckle.
“That’s right,” Sisko said. “The Defiant will follow close behind, ready to assist. We’ll communicate on a secured channel. The Phoenix will act to draw out the defenders. Once pulled away, the Defiant will decloak and attack the base. We’ll catch them in a pincer.”
Liang’s smile turned from sly to genuine. “Exactly the tactic I would’ve recommended, Captain. Number One, they restocked our supply of quantum torpedoes, correct?”
I double checked my screen. “Yes sir, they did.”
“Excellent. Then we’ll be loaded for bear. I’ll want the quantums loaded first.” Liang tapped his cane against his palm several times, then set it down. “I don’t want to give the Jem’Hadar a chance to rough us up like they did last time.”
“Very well,” Sisko said. “If there’s nothing else, Captain?” At Liang’s shake of the head, Sisko turned to an NCO sitting at an aft station, one with curly hair and a solid face that for just a moment seemed oddly familiar. “Chief O’Brien, engage the cloak.”
“Aye sir,” spoke O’Brien, who I realized now had been on the Enterprise for a short while during my time there. He glanced up at me and winked, so I winked back.
“Good hunting, Captain,” Sisko said as he broke communication. On the viewscreen we watched the Defiant swirl and fade away.
Liang grinned at me. “Charming young lad, isn’t he? Well, you heard the man, Rodrigo. Set course for Bouman Basin, warp eight.”
“Already laid in, sir,” Rodrigo grinned.
Pointing at the screen with his cane, Liang ordered, “Engage.”
Everything twisted and contorted on the screen before flashing with white as we leapt into warp. I monitored the engines, just in case something had gone wrong during repairs, but the ship performed beautifully.
“Well, now comes the hard part,” Liang said as he got up from his chair. “The waiting. Number One, you have the bridge. I’ll be in my ready room.”
I acknowledged him as I moved over to the command chair, which suddenly began to feel like a bed of spikes pressing into my back. What followed was a tense few hours as we sped across space towards the Basin. After the third hour passed, I called Cadeneza up to the bridge. To my surprise she was joined by Twilight, who gave me a stern, cold glare. I tried not to respond in kind as I gestured for them to follow me to the aft science console.
“This is really more Sparkie’s area of expertise,” Cadeneza said without preamble once we’d brought up the Bouman Basin on screen. “I’m deferring to her.” She gave me a pointed look. “She knows what she’s doing when it comes to stellar phenomena.”
“It’s true,” Twilight said, her voice stony. “Black holes are an integral part of stellar mechanics.”
“Alright then,” I replied. “Dismissed, Lieutenant.”
Cadeneza nodded, then eyed me for a split second and mouthed “Good luck” before she departed the bridge.
Twilight stiffened. “What’re your orders, ma’am?” she said, maintaining the stony tone.
I sighed, biting back the first of what were sure to be many harsh comments. “We’re going to be relying on you for detailed scans inside the Basin. The black holes will make it difficult to navigate in there.”
Twilight pulled out the seat to the console and sat down so she could better study it. “I can do that, ma’am.”
The complete lack of anything personable about her hurt. Each time she spoke it was like she was tearing out bits of my heart. But I forced myself to bury all that. Now was not the time. “Can you give me a quick overview of what we can see from here?”
She snorted, but complied, tapping at the keys until a large display of various singularities appeared on screen. “The Bouman Basin consists of approximately nineteen singularities of varying sizes, all within relatively close orbits of each other covering an area approximately two to three light years across. The area is considered especially dangerous, as in addition to the singularities there are several asteroid fields composed mostly of metals.”
“Any planets or stars?” I wondered.
She shot me a dirty look. “No, ma’am,” she said slowly, as if she was speaking to a child. “Whatever stars were here have collapsed into singularities, and the asteroid fields are likely the remnants of planets.”
My nostrils flared, but I managed to hold down my temper. I called upon the meditative techniques Mother had taught me and I immediately regretted letting myself fall so far out of practice with them. “Do we know what the origin of the Basin is? Why are there so many singularities or former stars close by?”
Twilight shrugged. “Nope. It’s been studied from a distance, but the gravitational effects make it difficult to study up close. About eighty years ago the U.S.S. Toronto attempted to chart the Basin and got caught too close to one of the singularities. By the time they escaped, over a decade had passed. Starfleet ordered the area marked as a major hazard on all navigational charts. Since then, any study of the Basin has been limited to uncrewed probes.”
“Well, we’ll have to be careful then. Last thing we want is to get trapped in there like the Toronto,” I said.
“Yeah,” Twilight scoffed. “Wouldn’t want to be trapped somewhere. People might think we’re dead.”
I cringed, feeling like I’d just stepped on a rake and smacked myself in the face with the handle. “Twilight–”
“With respect, Commander Shimmer,” Twilight cut me off instantly, “I’d prefer we not be too familiar with each other. If that’s acceptable, ma’am.”
And the rake was followed up by a one-two punch to the gut. Great. “R-right, of course, Ensign. My apologies.”
She chose not to respond, and focused her gaze squarely on her console. “Did you need anything else, ma’am, or should I get to work with the navigational assistance?”
Wishing a hole would open up beneath me and whisk me somewhere, anywhere other than on the bridge, I murmured, “No, Ensign. Carry on.” My whole body stiffened, moving mechanically as I trotted back to the command chair and took a seat. I forced my face to be as unmoving as a statue. I had to.
Otherwise I’d start crying, and I wouldn’t know when to stop.
“Helm,” I called out, cursing myself for the shakiness of my voice. “Time to the Basin?”
Rodriguez glanced back back over his shoulder to look at me, his usual grin replaced by a frown. “Err, we’re thirty minutes out. Is something–”
“Eyes on your station, Lieutenant!” I thundered, louder than I meant to, and cringed when I saw him sit ramrod straight in his chair and turn around.
“Yes ma’am, apologies ma’am,” he said, all traces of his normal congeniality vacant, replaced with stark obedience.
“Damn it,” I whispered. “Way to go, Sunset. Great job building that rapport.”
My blood pressure rose when I saw Williams step up from his ops position and stride over to me. “Can we talk for a moment?” he said.
I sighed. “Conference room. Ishihara, you have the conn.”
When we stepped into the conference room, where I could see the large tactical pod looming over the saucer, casting everything below into shadow. The sight made me wish I could sink into those shadows. Instead, I took a deep breath and faced Williams. “I know what you’re going to say, so go ahead. Speak freely.”
“Oh, you do, do you?” he said with a snort. He pointed with one hand back towards the bridge. “Because I just saw you cut a man’s balls off for no goddamn reason. You want to explain why you did that?”
Despite myself, I found my hackles rising once more, my blood boiling. “I said speak freely, not crudely, Williams,” I growled, “I won’t deny that I snapped at Rodriguez, but I honestly don’t feel like explaining a damn thing right now. Not to anyone.”
“Nuh uh. That’s not going to fly with Liang, and you know that.” Williams crossed his arms over his chest. “Look, I’m old, Shimmer. I took this position as a favor to James. I don’t owe you a damned thing. And so far I haven’t been too impressed with you. I’m not sure what you did to earn the position you have, and frankly? I don’t care. But this isn’t the first time I’ve heard about you unnecessarily shouting down a subordinate in public. If this is the way you’re going to treat your crew–”
“I made a mistake!” I snapped. The emotions, the anger, the sorrow, the hurt… it was all too much. I broke. The tears I’d been holding back gushed forth now like a torrential downpour. “I made a mistake…”
Williams’s hard expression washed away, replaced by shocked concern. “Woah, hey... Commander, I wasn’t trying to hit a nerve there–”
“No, Williams, it’s...not that. You don’t understand.” I collapsed into one of the chairs at the table and told him what happened between me and Twilight. I left very few details. “A-and now I don’t know what to do. She’s… she means the world to me, Williams. Twilight is my sister. Before her, before Mother and Mom, I never… never had a family. I don’t want to lose it now, not over something so, so stupid!”
Williams, who’d been both silent and unmoving during my story, finally gave me a nod with a quiet sigh. “I see. I’m sorry, Sunset. I completely misjudged the situation.” He held out a hand to shake in solidarity, which after a moment’s hesitation I took with one hoof. “Given what you’ve been through, if anything I should be praising your restraint. I’d be a lot madder if I were you.”
“I want to be mad,” I said, sniffling. “I want to be furious at her. To shout at her, tell her she’s being ungrateful, a stupid little foal. But I can’t be. She’s too important. She matters too much. I just want my sister back. And I don’t know how I’m going to do that.”
“Well, if I can help… just let me know.” Williams glanced at one of the wall panels, tapped it, then grimaced. “We’d better get back to the bridge. Time for our game faces.”
I took a moment to breathe, and used my magic to wipe away any traces of tears or snot. “Right. Right. Let’s go.”
Following him I stepped back onto the bridge, prompting Ishihara to leap out of the command chair. “Report,” I said, my voice firm.
“No sign of any Jem’Hadar yet, ma’am,” Ishihara replied as she returned to her position at tactical. “We’re two minutes out from the Basin.”
“Understood.” I rounded the command area and stepped up to the helm, just close enough to whisper to Rodriguez. “I apologize for snapping at you, Rodriguez. It was uncalled for.”
He grinned up at me and shook his head. “No worries, ma’am.”
Nodding, I tapped my combadge. “Shimmer to Liang. Sir, we’ve just about arrived.”
After a moment Liang stepped out of the ready room, and I joined him in our respective command chairs. He spotted Twilight, twitched his eyebrows, then sat down and gave me a knowing look. “Any trouble, Number One?”
“No, sir,” I reported. “No sign of Jem’Hadar yet. And Ensign Sparkle is standing by to assist with navigation through the Basin.”
“Is she? Well done, then.” Liang faced the viewscreen. “Let’s get a good look, shall we? Helm, drop us out of warp. Right at the edge.”
The ship shuddered as the star unstretched into points all around us… only to curl in on themselves and stretch backwards, contorting all over the place, while visible accretion disks twisted and writhed. While black holes weren’t visible, their effects sure as hell were, and the end result was so chaotic and irregular it was akin to an acid-fueled drug trip on an astronomical scale.
“Let’s start with some scans, hmm? See what’s out there,” Liang said.
I meanwhile turned to Ishihara. “Any word from the Defiant?”
She checked, then said, “They’ve dropped out of warp, holding position fifty thousand kilometers off our port side.”
“Good to know we’ve got them shadowing us,” I murmured.
“Nothing on sensors yet,” Williams announced. “But there’s a lot of interference. The readings are all over the place, bouncing like crazy. I can hardly tell them apart.”
“Hmm. Maybe our instincts were wrong after all,” Liang said, rubbing his chin. “You’d think they’d have sent a greeting party by now, if they were here.”
“Unless they’re hiding,” I pointed out. “They may be hoping we see these crazy sensor readings and think better of approaching at all.”
Liang clicked his tongue. “Fair point, Number One. Recommendations, Williams, Sparkle?”
I didn’t dare glance back at Twilight, instead seeing her reflection as she turned to face the captain. “If we go in, sir, we need to take it slow. No more than one eighth impulse. Any faster and we risk getting caught in gravitational eddies.”
“Agreed,” Williams chimed in. “Frankly sir, we won’t have much room for evasive maneuvers either.”
“Could be what they’re counting on,” I added. “Wait for us to come in, then they spring a trap.”
“Well, Captain Sisko did describe us as bait,” Liang mused. He leaned forward and placed his cane down perpendicular to the floor, setting his chin atop it. “I believe if we’re going to be bait, we should make ourselves look as appealing as possible.” Liang turned to the science stations. “Sparkle, switch all but one slice of the sensor grid to scientific scans. Make it look like we’re performing a survey, not looking for Jem’Hadar.”
“In the middle of all this, sir?” Williams scoffed.
Liang winked at him. “Oh I know it wouldn’t work against Cardassians, but these aren’t Cardassians. These are Jem’Hadar. And they’re single-minded. They think we’re weak, so let's look weak. In fact… reduce power to weapons. Redirect more to the sensors. Keep the shields up, but reduce to half strength.”
Grinning, I nodded. “Yes sir.” Taking a look at my console, I then tapped my badge. “Shimmer to Wattson. How much power can you leave in reserve for instant tapping when necessary?”
“As much as you want, ma’am. Why?”
“Guile, Wattson,” Liang added. “Guile.”
“...Understood, sir. I’ll keep the lines hot. Wattson out.”
“Well, it seems all our preparations are ready,” Liang said. He brought up his cane and pointed it forward. “Helm, take us in. Nice and slow now.”
As the ship slowly slipped into the Bouman Basin, I found myself filled with a distinct sense of unease. We had no idea where the Jem’Hadar were hiding, if they were even here at all. And despite the venting to Williams, despite getting all the emotions I could off my chest, my mind still kept wandering back to Twilight.
What was I going to do to win her back? Was it even possible? I knew Liang had ordered us to more counseling sessions; that order reached me last night just before I went to sleep. I had a session scheduled with Belle at 1400 in two days. But somehow I didn’t think counseling alone would cut it.
It made me wish Mother and Mom were here with us. Maybe with their influence we’d have a better chance.
Or not. We were adults, even Twilight, and if she wanted to distance herself from me for the rest of her life… there really wasn’t much I could do about it.
But I won’t give up my sister without a fight. I know I can get through to her eventually.
…
I hope.
