Nopony had ever looked at Big Macintosh and thought of subtlety. The massive Earth pony towered over most residents of Ponyville, speaking slowly, moving slowly and, most ponies expected, thinking slowly. At times, Big Macintosh was disappointed by the fact that just about every pony in Ponyville assumed that he was on the intellectual level of Derpy Hooves at best; other times, he liked that nopony considered him capable of guile, stealth, or deception. After all, wasn't deception most effective where was least expected?
Big Mac knew that something was odd about Twilight Sparkle's visit; as much as it had been a pleasure to see her, he expected that she hadn't come without reason. So, when another of Applejack's friends came to Sweet Apple Acres, he stayed out of sight and followed the pink pony, stationing himself outside the kitchen window after he heard Applejack calling from inside. From there, he just stayed quiet and still and listened as the two ponies discussed the issue stirring up so much activity; to Big Mac's surprise, he learned that the issue was him.
He was not any stranger to the attentions of mares by any means, but most of the ones that were interested in him just wanted a stallion that was big, strong, and dumb, and Big Mac didn't want to disappoint the poor fillies on that last count, which would have been necessary in any serious relationship. Still, Rarity had never seemed the sort that would be into him, quite the opposite, in fact; he had doubted that she would ever want to be associated with a farmer in that way. But though he was surprised by the news of Rarity's interest in him, he was even more surprised by his sister's reaction to it. The outburst that caused Pinkie Pie to leave seemed far out of proportion to Applejack's normal feelings of over-protectiveness toward her big brother; it didn't make any sense to Big Mac until he heard his sister start to cry, just after Pinkie Pie had left.
From there, everything fell into place in Big Mac's mind. It explained why she always talked about Rarity more than her other friends, and why she had been so unbelievably devastated when her dress order had made Rarity look bad in front of Hoity-Toity. It also explained why she never seemed to be much interested the stallions that often took a shine to her. In retrospect, it made a lot of sense, and Big Mac practically kicked himself for not realizing sooner. He saw immediately what he had to do, and ran quickly toward Ponyville, hoping to catch up with Pinkie Pie.
He caught sight of the pink mare before too long. She had stopped, and appeared to be talking to an oak tree. Big Mac kept his distance, watching her, only slightly surprised by this behavior; he'd seen Pinkie Pie enough around town and at the few parties he had attended to know that talking to trees would not be out of character for her. He was surprised, however, when a rainbow blur streaked out of the tree's branches, headed off toward Sweet Apple Acres. Big Mac wondered what Pinkie had told Rainbow Dash as he followed the bouncing pink pony toward Ponyville.
***
Rarity couldn't seem to find Rainbow Dash anywhere. The mare was lazy, but at least she was reliably lazy; Rarity knew that at this time of day, Dash would be napping somewhere. Unfortunately, all the trees in Ponyville were pegasus-free, and Dash hadn't been at her floating home when Rarity had yelled up to it. She was just about to give up the search when she spotted the other pony she wanted to see; Pinkie Pie was bouncing into town. Rarity trotted toward her pink friend, hoping for good news, but when she saw the look on Pinkie's face, she nearly despaired. Pinkie Pie was almost never seen without a smile, grin, or some other expression of joy; with such a serious look on her face now, the news Pinkie Pie brought could not be good.
"Pinkie Pie! What happened? Is something wrong?"
Pinkie Pie nodded, "Applejack is reeeeeal mad. When I asked her if her brother is seeing anybody, she wanted to know who was interested in him, so I told her it was you and she practically exploded! She told me to leave real angry like. I've never seen her so mad!"
"Oh dear oh dear oh dear, you told her it was me? I know we don't always get along too well, but I didn't think she'd react that badly. Still, I'd hoped to wait till later to tell her about it. And on my own terms. Oh, I hope this hasn't ruined everything."
Pinkie Pie looked crestfallen, "Oh no. So we're disappointed?"
Rarity was already distracted, thinking of ways to salvage her plans, but she responded offhand, "I don't blame you, Pinkie dear, but I am disappointed."
"Oh no. That's bad. How do we express disappointment? I know," Pinkie Pie yelled to herself, clapping her front hooves, "A party! No! Bad Pinkie Pie! Parties are only for good things. This is a Bad Thing. How do ponies express bad things? I know! Cursing!" The pink pony bounced with glee.
Rarity had ignored Pinkie Pie's soliloquy, lost in her plans, before that last bit caught her attention, "Darling, wha-?"
Pinkie Pie interrupted Rarity's question with a prodigious shout, "FUCK A MAILBOX. SHIT DAMN. ASS." Ponies all over town stuck their heads out of windows and opened doors to see what the commotion was. Rarity was overcome by a combination of shock, embarrassment, confusion, and amusement.
"Pinkie Pie, dear, don't be vulgar! ...Especially when you're so bad at it..." She frowned at the other pony, who looked quite pleased with herself, "Did you at least find out whether or not Big Mac is single?"
"Nope," Pinkie Pie replied, "Applejack told me to leave before she told me. About Big Mac, I mean, I didn't mean she told me to leave before she told me to leave, 'cause that would be silly."
Rarity smiled, trying to make the best of a bad situation, "Well, thanks for trying darling. I have some thinking to do. You should probably go deal with whatever was smoking in your house."
"No way!" Pinkie Pie grinned, "I'm going to go get me some cupcakes. I told you the smoke was all in hand, so don't you worry about it at all. Bye Rarity!" She bounced off toward the shop, humming quietly to herself.
Rarity sighed to herself, "Now what am I going to do?"
***
"Applejack, you've got to tell her."
Rainbow Dash hadn't thought before speaking; she rarely did. Now, though, as she caught her breath and grew more and more uncomfortable while Applejack continued to stare at the ground, Rainbow Dash thought. It wasn't going to be that easy; Applejack's feelings for Rarity had been obvious to Dash for months, and if Applejack hadn't had the courage to tell Rarity yet, it would be hard to convince her to do so now. Still, Dash knew she had to try, and so she waited for a response as the silence dragged on.
Finally, Applejack murmured her reply, kicking at the dust with a hoof, "Ah can't."
Rainbow Dash was not pleased, "What do you mean you can't?"
"Ah jus' can't, okay?" Applejack shouted. "Jus' leave me alone, okay Rainbow Dash? I don't want to talk about it."
"So you're just going to give up?" Rainbow Dash asked, appalled. "The second bravest pony in Ponyville, and you can't gather the courage to tell one pony how you feel about her? I thought my favorite competitor was better than that."
"It's nawt as simple as all that, Dash," the orange mare snapped back, "Ya wouldn't understand!"
Fury washed over Rainbow Dash, fury and regret. She shouted, "Don't you tell me that Applejack! I do understand! I know exactly what it's like to fall for a friend, and not know if you'll ever have a chance to be with her, to fear that she would hate you if she found out!" Applejack's eyes widened in shock as Rainbow Dash continued to shout, words pouring forth in a torrent, "I understand what it's like to treasure every bit of bickering, every argument and competition and fight, because it's time spent with her! Don't tell me I don't understand! I do. I understand too well." Rainbow's tone softened, and the rasp in her voice became a bit deeper as she struggled to maintain her composure, "I also understand what it's like to see the object of your affection fall for someone else. When you started looking at Rarity the way I knew I looked at you, well... it hurt. It hurt so much that I didn't know what to do."
Applejack gasped, "Oh, Dash. Ah never knew..."
Rainbow Dash cut her off before she could say anything more, "It doesn't matter now. I got over it. Still, I wouldn't wish it on anyone; you shouldn't make the same mistakes I made. Whether or not I had a chance, I should have told you. But you have to tell Rarity; you do have a chance. Take it."
"Ya might've had a chance with me Dash, but ah ain't got no chance with Rarity. She's taken a shine ta Big Mac, an' he's a stallion; she wouldn't be int'rested in mares like me," Applejack sighed, her gaze returning to the dirt.
Rainbow Dash waved a dismissive hoof, "A pony can go for both stallions and mares. Trust me. But really, you do have a chance! Did Pinkie Pie tell you why Rarity was asking about Big Mac?"
"Well... no Ah suppose."
Rainbow Dash grinned, "Well she did tell me. Rarity and Twilight used some of that unicorn magic to learn something about the future. They learned that Rarity is going to love an Apple. I think they just assumed that it would be Big Mac, and started from there."
Applejack perked up, "D'ya reckon...?"
Rainbow Dash nodded, smiling, "I think they have the wrong Apple. That's why you need to tell Rarity about how you feel. Like, right now."
Applejack grinned, "Alright, Ah'll tell 'er. Ah'll go find 'er right now."
Dash shook her head, "No, you wait here. I'll go find her and tell her you have something to say to her. She might already be coming here; Pinkie was pretty upset when I saw her, and she probably told Rarity how you reacted."
"Thanks a might, Dash," Applejack replied as Rainbow Dash started beating her wings, taking off and gaining altitude. Then, Dash paused and hovered a few meters in the air.
"It's no problem Applejack. Just remember, if things don't work out with Rarity... Well, I'll still be around."
And then, in a rainbow flash, she was gone.