//------------------------------// // 87- Gods Must Be Strong // Story: Changing Expectations // by KKSlider //------------------------------// “Are you ready to order?” Count Double Dealing smiled, “Yes, I think we are. I’ll have the grilled fruit kebab, with cinnamon honey glaze. These three will not be ordering.” The waitress nodded and then asked me, “And you, sir?” She was a yellow pegasus with a two toned blue and white mane, done up in a ponytail. ‘Poor little thing. You should not be here in this den of lions, things might get messy. I should probably think of a way to get you out of here.’ “Bitalian chopped salad, no tomatoes.” The waitress nodded and left us once more. “You know,” I began, “I was pretty sure that I was going to be the first into this business. You were not supposed to be here. You were just supposed to be a potential client.” Double Dealings shrugged, “I’m afraid you missed that boat. A Manehattan minute is famously short, after all. Things move quickly in the big apple. You should have known that. If there are bits to be made, then there are ponies willing to make those bits.” I refrained from grinding my teeth, “This is such a gross oversight. I’m really going to need to have a word with Hired Muscle about this.” Dealings paused, “Wait, your hired muscle is actually named Hired Muscle? That can’t be a fake name, not unless this muscle is actually more clever than you are!” He started laughing. With his breathless voice, he was more of a wheezing gasp than anything else. “Stop talking.” I started tapping a hoof on the table impatiently. ‘What an annoying setback. Now I have to deal with this imbecile. Still, replacing half of his gang here is quite the ambush. We’ll just follow him back somewhere nice and quiet, and then we’ll spring the trap. Length to hang himself my ass, I’ll strangle him myself when this is over!’ He would notice the discrepancy immediately when arriving at wherever he intends to bring my stuff. That discrepancy being that the changelings’ goods that he is pilfering were not actually there. When we arrived, we would have to attack immediately. The unicorn piped up, “Stop tapping the–” “You stop talking, too.” Double Dealings smiled, “Cheer up, young Al. This is a learning experience you’ll greatly benefit from.” “Uh huh.” Minutes passed by slowly. I always hated waiting. ‘What’s Luna up to? I bet she’s listening to some snobby noble whine about how oppressive it is to follow the law. ‘But-but-but Your Majesty, slavery is a necessary tool to progress the nation!’ If it wasn’t for the fact that I was one of them, I’d probably be all for the dismantling of royalty and the noble class. As it is, changelings have it right: no nobles and myself as king. I can do no wrong, I’m Phasma! Heh, I should be fine as long as Thorax sticks with me. If he disapproves of something… I should probably listen to him then. He’s got an outside view on this. Outside of the vanity that comes with being royalty, that is. ‘Maybe I can reorganize the changeling Hive to where it has a legislative body. Let that handle a lot of the heavy lifting. Throw in a judicial system, educate the Praetorians or whatever to make them more along the lines of police. Give Thorax a position where he has some sort of veto. Good ol’ nepotism… Yeah, sounds like a plan. I could even draft a constitution.’ More plans for the future. Just like back in the hive before the invasion. Always planning ahead, to points I might not ever reach. Better than just sitting here on my hooves, doing nothing. There was also the fact that Double Diamond’s family were electronic engineers. ‘Radios, here in Equestria! I wonder what else they can cook up for me! I just need to give them all the bits they need, in exchange for having a voice in their process. Promote ideas, shoot down others. This could be really useful. Screw the Prime Directive or whatever, as long as it doesn’t hurt people directly or indirectly, it’s fair game.’ A diversified portfolio was the endgame. ‘No... Luna’s the real endgame. We’re going to do so many unChristian things together: hold hooves, evade taxes, cheat death through agelessness, and so many pranks. I wonder if she’s thought of making a cult, just for shits and giggles. Considering how boring the centuries must have been before video games, I’d say probably. Oh, that’s another thing I need the Diamonds to invent.’ My musings came to an end when the waitress finally arrived with a large tray of dishes on her back. She slowly set the dishes down in front of each of us. "Thank you dear," Double Dealings said with a smile as the kebab was laid down in front of him and onto a wooden cutting board. "And your salad," The waitress muttered as she set down a large bowl of green stuff in front of me. I gave her a nod, but otherwise held my tongue. Despite my meandering train of thought, the fact that I was sitting here as bait for a trap I was hesitant to step into in the first place was beyond grating. There were a hundred and one more productive things I could be doing, including but limited to napping. "Let me know if there's anything else I can help you with." With that, the waitress backed off and left us to our two meals. The unicorn was now resting his head on a hoof propped up on the table. I still reckoned that he was watching me like a hawk. The Count picked up his skewered fruit and pulled one off with his teeth and began chewing. "You know," he said with a full mouth, earning an eye roll from me, "worse ponies than I would have not even stopped to chat with you. They'd have simply shown up at your place of business in the dead of night and stormed the doors." 'If only. Instead, I have to sit here listening to you.' "That would be unfortunate," I said. Time continued to pass slowly as I watched him slowly pick at his own meal. I left the salad untouched. He quirked an eyebrow at that but thankfully didn't start speaking again. After what had to be at least fifty weeks of waiting, Razer, Froghopper, and the rest of the ponies finally returned. Or I should say, Froghopper returned. The rest of the ponies would not be seeing the light of day anytime soon. Accompanying him was the majority of the second wave of changeling backup I would be calling on. 'Showtime.' Upon seeing them arrive, Count Double Dealings sighed happily, "Efficient as always! That's why you're my top enforcer, and why I pay you the big bucks!" Faux Razer snorted as he sat down next to the Count, "Not nearly enough." "Are all affairs are in order?" Razer grunted out a reply. "Marvelous. That leaves one matter of business to settle." "I really don't think it does. I'll be leaving now. Try not to drown in your own pride, Double," I sneered as I started to stand from my seat. "Blend in until he brings you to his base of operations or whatever. When he goes inside, leave the doors open and get ready to spring ambush–" "I need to make sure you really understand the importance of this lesson." "I'm pretty sure that I understand how you took everything that I own." He laughed, "No. What I mean to say is… I need you to understand the consequences of coming back, or Celestia forbid, trying to get revenge." 'Can this guy get any worse?' "Don't worry, we're not going to kill you. Though it's going to be close…" '... Huh.' "Hold for new orders," I commanded. "I've complied, haven't I?" "Yes but I need to know that I have your word that you won't come back, and I'm afraid your verbal promises aren't exactly worth anything. I'm going to need something from you. A hoof, perhaps. Or a wing, depending on how much you resist." The restaurant was quiet. I spied the staff hiding inside, watching through the windows. 'Even the staff knew.' I kept a straight face and tried my best to not grind my teeth. The Count took my silence as his cue to continue, "I'm so sorry this has to happen, but it does have to. You understand the importance of messages, surely?" "I've complied. Do not do this." 'I was going to let you live. Well really you were going to be turned into a living battery for potentially the rest of your life, but still. The ponies might have even been able to negotiate for your release.' He shrugged. 'If that's the way you want to play it.' "Follow us to where he takes us and–" "Razer. You may begin." I started, "Here? Now?!" "Cordon off the area! I need a team up front casting an illusion to hide what's going on! We're going to have to be quick, there's no way to quickly throw up a silencing field to hide the sound!" Razer was hesitating. "I said you may start, Razer," Double Dealings pressed. "Stall him. Get close to the unicorn and stun him. When he stuns the unicorn, everyone attack!" I stood there, directing the counter attack without moving a muscle. To the ponies, I looked like I was frozen in shock. "You know boss, I think I deserve a bonus for this," Razer said, standing up and slowly sauntering over to the Count's other side, where the unicorn sat. "You've picked a hell of a time to make that demand." "That's why they call it a demand, yeah? Asking nicely when things are calm and quiet rarely gets you anything you’re asking for." All the while, he inched closer to the unicorn bodyguard. I decided to interfere. The more distractions thrown in, the better. "Double Dealings! I was going to handle this discreetly and do away with you when no one was looking. But now, you've forced my hoof! Remember this moment thirty seconds from now; this was the moment you died, you just don't know it yet!" The ponies were all looking at me now. By the time they noticed the fact that Razer had stopped behind the unicorn, it was too late to do anything. With a single swift upward strike of a wing, the changeling disguised as Razer slammed into the unicorn in the throat. He then grappled the unicorn and struck him in the horn. They went down to the ground in a tangle of limbs. "Attack!" The commotion had redirected the ponies' attention away from me, allowing me to extend a wing and discreetly grab the kebab from Count Double Dealings' plate. With a flick of a hoof, I cleared the rest of the fruit from the skewer. The Count began to yell, "What the ponyfeathers are you–" That was when the spells started flying in from the neighboring rooftops and from the front of the restaurant. His minions, now replaced with my own, began to throw out barrages of stunning spells. The changelings that weren't disguised as unicorns each changed into a unicorn in a green flash and unleashed their own spells. Or if they were too close, engaged in hoof-to-hoof combat with the real ponies closest to them. In an instant, the courtyard had erupted into chaos. Ponies were yelling, grunting in pain as they spasmed and fell to the ground, or started throwing hooves with the closest of their comrades. More than one attacked non-changelings in the ensuing chaos. 'Speaking of chaos…' Count Double Dealings was getting whiplash from turning to and fro, trying to see all of the chaos at once. With a single strong flick of my right pegasus wing, the Count shuttered and slowly looked down to see the dirty skewer now impaled halfway into his chest. His right earth pony guard had attempted to come to the unicorn's rescue, but was attacked by a nearby changeling who jumped to our aid. The left guard was the only pony left standing at the table, and seeing me impale his boss with a kitchen utensil, leapt for me. Froghopper intercepted him midair and they dove to the ground, kicking and punching. Count Double Dealings stumbled backwards and fell off his chair and onto the ground. With a hiss, a groan, and a gasp, he tried to get up, failed, and then began to crawl away. "You could have lived, stupid pony." I began to prowl after him, making my way around the table. "It didn't have to be this way. It would have been nice, quiet, and contained. But no, you wanted to do this in public. And though you dug your own grave deep, it fell to me to make sure you occupied it." He groaned once more as he dragged himself across the patio. A trail of blood was smeared onto the ground behind him. "You're dead already, you just don't know it yet. Remember?" He coughed blood. A changeling and an earth pony went down in front of us, wrestling with each other. Four more changelings, now freed from their fights, dogpiled the lone pony, ending the fight. Upon seeing this, Double Dealings hesitated, then started crawling in a different direction. With an orange flash, I replaced my wings with a horn. It didn't matter that we were being seen. There would be no witnesses. I picked up a notepad from a counter near the entrance to the store. Through the window, I saw three changelings stunning and binding up the staff. They were quick and efficient. We had improved since Canterlot, learning from that failure. The fight was wrapping up. The surprise attack had completely caught the ponies off guard, being attacked from above and from within. There were a few bruised up changelings that I could see, but other than that we had completely rolled the mobsters. They were not Canterlot’s Finest, nor even Manehattan’s Mediocres; they were just hired thugs. Skilled and vetted as they may be, they were a far cry from anything actually military. "Prep them all for podding. Not the Count, he's mine." Count Double Dealings was still crawling away slowly. I chuckled as I started to get close, "You were right, Count. I am new to the city. But the game? I've been playing this since I was born, whelp." I caught up and stopped next to him. He was whimpering from the pain, unable to even scream in pain. I must've hit a lung or something. When he saw my hooves next to him, he flinched and curled away from me, no longer crawling forwards. "You are just a pawn, playing against immortals." I lifted a hoof, placed it on his back, and pressed down hard. He gurgled and shook as the end of the skewer came all the way through the bottom of his chest and out his withers. Count Double Dealings collapsed onto the ground. He reeked of fear. "Just a pawn, and gods must be strong." I tossed the notebook and pen next to his head. Channeling magic and formatting the complex spell, I casted mind control onto him as I bent low, next to his ear. "Bank pins. Passwords. Locations. Anything I need to access your assets. Write them and label each one. Important contacts, too.” He weakly lifted his head and closest hoof, and focused hard as he began to write. His hoof was trembling. The hoofwriting was crooked. The mana burn was starting to kick in. The pad was getting stained with blood. “You know, for the ruler of a species that has remained hidden for thousands and thousands of years, I’m not so good at the whole ‘staying hidden’ thing," I mused. "I seem to operate on only two modes: completely still and Scorched Earth. Or would that be Scorched Equus? Not really that good of a liar, either. Ah, it doesn't matter. I’m a king, not an Infiltrator. I don’t need to be good at lying and staying hidden, and in fact my duties often are in conflict with such goals. He who dares, wins.” I looked up to the sky and took a deep breath. The entire courtyard reeked of fear and confusion. So much so that the previous smells of happiness and fresh foods were drowned out. My own chest was pounding from the sheer adrenaline. ‘How had they masked their emotions so well? No nervousness. No hatred. Just amusement. I suppose the Count chose his minions selectively and trained them well. Damn shame all his effort was for nothing. Or maybe it was pure hubris. They felt no fear, for they thought they were not in danger. They had no idea that the timid lamb they brought into their midst was a wolf in sheep’s clothing.’ “Ponies forget who I am. Luna, Search, Bray, Dew, Cadence. They look at me and see a hurt pony. Fine, maybe I am hurt. But a pony? Not a snowball’s chance in hell. When push comes to shove, I’ll make sure I’m never shoved again. Or better yet, that the bastard never gets to shove me in the first place.” After writing several pages of notes, the earth pony fell back onto the ground. I picked up the pad and examined the notes. They were satisfactory. ‘There’s a lot of good stuff here. I think I shall incorporate much of his network of contacts into my own, as well. I’ll need to visit his home…’ "You’ve made up for inconveniencing me. Thanks for the conversation, it was cathartic," I murmured without looking down at him. The Count was growing quiet; he might not have even heard me. I let go of the mind control spell and examined the scene around me. Ponies were getting their hooves, wings, muzzles, and horn bound up. A changeling was close by, watching me. When I looked at him, he stepped forward. "Sir. Where do we put them all?" I checked the notepad, “Three Fifty-Three West Amber Road. Empty warehouse, shell company. That's not connected to the Count, store them there." "Yes, but…" "Do it. Bring carts. Do not use direct paths there, use varying routes. We will get everything organized after." I glanced back at the Count. There were no more emotions coming from him. Dead. "I'll need help cleaning up." "Right away, sir." Two changelings picked the warm body up and carried it off. Another brought a mop and bucket from inside and began to wipe up the blood. I held up a hoof and waved him off. ‘I’d rather not hoof my mess off to someone else to clean up.’ Taking the mop in my own magic, I began to wash away the evidence. As I mopped back and forth, I also brought up the bloodstained pad and began reading. I would need to memorize this sooner rather than later. I didn’t want to hold onto it longer than I had to. Ten minutes later, it became clear that the carts would need a second trip to finish cleaning up the place. A changeling approached me as I hooves off the cleaning supplies to another changeling. "Your Majesty! The Manehattan Guard are here!" I frowned, "How many?" "Four, come to investigate a series of noise complaints." ‘I’m far from topped off on mana now, so fighting or mind control is going to be quite the annoyance. Further, attention from guards is the last thing we need. There’s no way I can make them vanish without a trace, nor even mind control them if they’re a full squad. Maybe if we can nab them and bring them in, but it’s best if I try to convince them to fuck off.’ "I'll handle them." I transformed into a unicorn I had seen in the crowd of ponies and headed to the front of the garden. A stray thought made me paused and check my hooves. The bottoms were covered in blood, despite the recent transformation. I made sure to clean them off thoroughly before I headed out to the street in front of the restaurant. There, a squad of changelings were maintaining the illusionary field I had ordered. "Where are the guards?" One pointed to the west side of the street. Through the illusion, I saw a squad of guards talking to a nervous pony. Likely a changeling sent to delay them. "Let me through." They adjusted the field to allow me to show up and pass through it. I made a beeline for the guards. They noticed my approach and started to push past the changeling that was trying to delay them. "You in charge here?" The one in front demanded. "Yessir, I'm the general manager." "We've received several noise complaints. Your colt here won't let us through. What's going on?" I glanced backwards. The sight behind me was the occasional wagon show up, pick up some ponies, then head off through the opposite end of the street. The illusion hid the fact that the wagons were covered in tarps, and it was unconscious, bound ponies loaded up. “I’m sorry sir, but a client has reserved the restaurant for a private party. I could have sworn I filed the proper paperwork notifying the city that we would have need of the entire street for the duration of the party– lots of ponies coming and going, you see.” The guard snorted, “And the noise complaints?” “Well it was a party. I suspect at least a few of those noise complaints were about a fight that broke out over something they were discussing. We didn’t ask for details from the client as we respect our client’s privacy, but the fight was broken up quickly and nopony was seriously injured.” “What kind of party ends in a hoof fight– Oh, wait a second. What is the name of your restaurant?” “The Red Dragon,” I answered without looking back to check. The guard rubbed the bottom of his chin, slightly nudging his helmet out of the way as he did so. “The Red Dragon… Could have sworn you were six blocks west of here… Ahem. I apologize for wasting your time here. I trust that there is no need to inform your client about our badgering? We simply were momentarily lost, you see….” ‘Oh? Oh! Oh-ho-ho!’ I smiled, “Certainly sir. As far as they are aware, the party went off without issue.” The guard returned the smile and nodded, “Thanks. C’mon fellahs, nothing’s happening here that we need to be a part of.” One of the other members began a question but the lead guard silenced him with a particularly strong glare. The junior guard’s jaw closed with an audible clack. The lead guard then led the squad away from the restaurant, in the opposite direction. “Uh, sir? What was that?” The changeling that delayed them asked as we watched them walk away. “The good Count has friends in high places. Friends that I have inherited, it seems. I’m sure as long as the bits keep going into the right pockets, they won’t care about our business merger.” ‘Note to self, make a charitable donation to the police union’s fund.’ I patted the disguised changeling on the shoulder, “Keep up the good work.” “Oh! Thank you sir!” He beamed. As I headed back to the courtyard, I began thinking about the cover up. We’d need to find out who each pony is: family, place of residence, bills they need to pay, and so on. It would take a while, even using love harvested from them to power a mind control spell. Which meant I would be delegating a lot of expansion and integration of assets. ‘Better get started immediately. The gangsters can probably be vanished without too much of a fuss, I bet. Being a gangster isn’t exactly a safe or consistent business. But the staff? That would bring more attention than I’d want…’ Once all the relevant details about each pony were dug up, only then could we come up with a cover story for why each one left Manehattan suddenly. ‘I really hope none of these fuckers have kids.’ I was going to have a busy week.