//------------------------------// // Hope // Story: Enough Reasons To Die // by Script Singer //------------------------------// I smiled at my friends as I exited Sugar Cube Corner and waved goodbye. “Thanks again for all the fun girls!” I uttered. Once I turned around, I felt a frown grow on my face as a sudden weight fell on my shoulders.  I slowly walked back to my house, feeling like every single step was heavier than the last. I felt like I was walking for hours by the time I got to my door. I let out a sigh as I shut the front door, feeling my walls crashing down. I started sobbing as I removed my mask and set it on the table by the door. I can’t take the pain any longer so I might as well just end it. I walked upstairs to my room, shutting the door behind me and pulled out the knife from my dresser, and stared at it for a moment. I brought the blade to my hoof and pressed the blade against my skin but stopped when I heard my door squeak open. I turned around shocked, finding Ellie standing in the doorway.  “Script, what are you doing?” She asked. I turned around letting out a soft sigh as I pressed the blade harder into my skin. “Script, please put the knife down,” Ellie said walking up to me holding out her claw. I only ignored her. Ellie walked over to the side of my bed to face me. “Script, please.”  “I can’t take the pain anymore…” I muttered, my voice shaking.  “Script, suicide isn’t the answer. Please just listen-” I flashed a glare at my friend. “It’s my life, why can’t I make the choice for myself?!” “Because we need you here! Why can’t you see that?” “Nopony really cares about how I feel, if they did, then I wouldn’t be feeling like this!” “We do care! You just can’t see it, would you open up your eyes and see what’s in front of you?” I let out a scream of frustration as I pressed the blade harder into my skin. “Script, please…” Ellie’s voice began to shake slightly. “I don’t want to see you get hurt, you’re like a sister to me.” Hearing that made me stop for a moment. I dropped the knife and fell to the ground sobbing. Ellie rushed over to my side and wrapped her wings around me in a tight embrace.  “Ellie…” I muttered. “I can’t do this anymore… I’m so tired of this. What do I do…?” Ellie stroked my mane and began rocking back and forth as she held me. “It’s gonna be alright, I promise…” She whispered. “I’ll help you in whatever way I can.” I let out a sniff as I looked at my griffon friend. “How can you be so sure that I’ll get better…?” I muttered.  “I’ll make sure of it, I promise Script.”  I felt a soft smile grow on my face as she said that, but it quickly turned into a frown. “So… what’s gonna happen now…?” I asked. “Am I going back to the psych ward?”  “I can’t force you, but if you want to go back, you can. It’s your choice. But it wouldn't hurt to go back." I hung my head and nodded. "I think that might be what's best for now. Maybe for just a few days.” Ellie pulled me in for another hug, holding me tight. “Want me to walk you over?” I nodded my head as I got up from my bed, reaching for the knife but Ellie grabbed it before I could. “It’s probably best that you stay away from sharp objects at the moment.” I nodded my head as I went to grab my stress blanket and a few other things I was allowed to bring last time. By the time I was finished, Ellie was ready to take me to the psych ward. --- A few months had passed since that day. Ellie decided to move in with me after I got back from the psych ward and things have been getting better. I hadn’t relapsed since then and it felt good to be alive. I felt like things could actually get better. I heard Ellie call me downstairs for dinner and I looked at myself in the mirror with a smile on my face.  "You are stronger than you were yesterday," I say to myself.  It's a mantra Ellie and a few friends helped me come up with. I make my way to Ellie and we have dinner. We chatted about the day and my progress on bettering myself. I tell her that I've been keeping a journal and writing in it when I feel down as getting them out helps. I even keep a second journal for songs and other inspirational ideas for when I have good days. I plan to share them with my friends one day.  This whole experience has opened my eyes to help me see how cherished I am and that even if things get bad for me, there's always someone who'll fight to help me back up when I want to stay down. I may have enough reasons to want to die, but I also have a counterpart to it as someone will always come up with enough reasons I want to live.