//------------------------------// // Wild Weasel // Story: Equestria Digital // by DeltaChevron //------------------------------// I slept well after taking several hours to recount the storyline of Dead Money. No strange dreams, no nightmares, it was probably about midnight when I fell asleep and Rosy and Mist were still shivering with fear form the story. I’d make it up to them later with another video game story, maybe Old World Blues it was hammy enough to upset when its storyline finally ended. When I woke up it was probably around 8 o’clock, the time my internal clock always wakes me up. Mist and Rosy were still asleep. As I rolled out of bed I realized I hadn’t bathed in a few days so I made my way to the bathroom. I used my ears to turn on the water for the shower. After waiting for it to heat up I stepped in and carefully began scrubbing myself with shampoo. I used to be able to shower quickly but it took me at least twenty minutes to finish washing and make sure there wasn’t any soap left in my fur. I shut off the water and grabbed my towel when I was dry, well drier; my fur fluffed itself up making me seem much fluffier than I actually was. Even though it made me look stupid it certainly helped my fur dry quicker. I smoothed it down and grabbed my new bag, making sure my copy of Pocket Ref was inside, and I made my way to the study. I sat down at a desk with some paper and pulled out my pencil to begin sketching out designs for a battle saddles. Though there were hundreds of guns there were only five or six different ones. The saddle I was sketching now was for the favorite gem I found amongst the weapons. Ten Barrett M107A1s, forty Browning M2s and several hundred thousand rounds each of Mk211, AP, API, and standard ammunition. Get those M107A1s on the stable platform the pony body provides and teach them to shoot accurately and we’d have the perfect anti, well, everything. The hard part would be adjusting the scopes but for now I was more worried about getting a working design done. After several failed sketches I managed to make one that I thought might work for the M107s. I had other plans for the M2s, as in mount them on the walls if we came under attack. I sketched out some basic designs for the M240s I had seen listed, ammo box on the left side across the back and into the gun on the right, hurray for belt fed. I heard somepony walking down the hallway and the almost inaudible slosh of liquid in a glass meant it was probably Grey Main. He walked in carrying a tray of freshly sliced fruit and a glass of water. I folded up my sketches and put them in the bag with my pencil. It’s not that I didn’t trust Grey Main; it’s just that I don’t truly trust anyone I don’t know as well as the back of my paw. “When I saw you weren’t in bed I decided to make you some breakfast.” “How did you know I was here?” “Two days ago you showed a great deal of interest in this room so I decided to check here first.” “I like reading and I don’t think I’ve ever seen such an impressive private collection.” He set the tray down “It is isn’t it. I remember when some of the upper shelves hadn’t been filled. Since you are living with us now, I was wondering if you would help me with the grocery shopping today. I’m not entirely sure what foods you like or even what range of foods you can eat.” “I’d be happy to help,” my stomach growled “just as soon as I finish this breakfast you made me.” I ate quickly and scribbled a note for everypony so they would know where I had gone. As we walked I realized I knew very little about Grey Main. He was a butler. He had lived or served in the same house for a while if his comment in the study was anything to go by. God, well gods I guess, I hate making small talk. “So,” I hesitated “how long have you known Blue’s family?” He spoke less formally now “Believe it or not Blue and I grew up together. I spent a lot of time at her house. We were very close especially in the months before I joined Princess Celestia’s Royal Guard. I served for five years as on officer’s aide before I came back here.” “So then how did you become their butler?” “When I came back Blue’s family needed somepony to help them. I was shocked to learn that Blue had had a foal while I was gone. Rosy was about five and I think she is what made me decide to take Sunny up on her offer to work for them.” “Do you know who her father is?” He scowled and shook his head “Based on who visited the other night I have my suspicions but I don’t know for sure.” “For her sake I hope you’re wrong about it being him. Could you imagine if he somehow got custody and was responsible for raising her? I think I’d rather walk unarmed into Dead Wind cavern with an air horn.” “I take it doing that would be suicide?” “With a capital S.” The town market was packed with ponies shopping for food, pottery, and all manner of things. We went from stall to stall carefully examining the food before picking anything. I offered to help carry everything but Grey Main wouldn’t hear of it. In the end he relented and let me carry a small bag of seasonings. On our way out of the market we passed by a street were a crowd had formed around something. “Everypony stay back. This is official business of The Marshals.” We headed towards the crowd and heard whispers of what happened, who did this, why would somepony do this, and other things in that vein. It was quieter on this street, even with the rubberneckers talking. I could hear a faint buzzing that sounded like insects. I’d seen enough shows to know what that meant. Before I even realized what I was doing I was pushing my way through the ponies. The Marshals took one look at my bag glanced at each other and decided I could pass. What I saw was one of Prince Blueblood’s guards or at least what was left of him. The sight wasn’t what bothered me, lots of M games and CSI style shows tends to make it a bit less shocking. I picked up a nearby stick and began using it to lift some flaps of skin and muscle here and there. “What do you think? A griffin?” one asked me “No,” I pointed to three small nubs in the armor “ Half right though, some kind of bird did this. Had to be pretty big and it lacks dexterity. A griffin could’ve removed the armor and probably wouldn’t have left the body behind either. The bones are still mostly intact from what I can see so that rules out anything with teeth because they would’ve cracked open the bones for the marrow.” “You can tell all that just from a quick glance?” “I’ve seen lots of stuff.” “I’m surprised you’ve been able to look at this thing for so long. We’ve had to change officers several times while we wait for the corner to arrive. It just…just looks so gruesome.” “Yeah, it is.” I stood up “Now if you’ll excuse me I need to go throw up.” He smirked “So you really COULDN’T take the sight then.” “No, it’s the smell.” seriously its only reason I hate roadkill I dropped the stick and found a discreet corner. When I turned around a unicorn offered me a towel and some water. I thanked her and used them to clean myself up. I asked a few more questions like if the sky could be kept could free for a few nights. How clear was the sky last night? About how long ago do you think this happened? Stuff like that, I made a few recommendations for public safety and then went back over to Grey. We walked back to the house in silence though neither of us would say it we were worried about the ponies we lived with. I made a snap decision, stuffing the bag of spices into Grey’s saddle bag I took off for the factory. At a full run I made it there in just less than ten minutes. Forgoing the stairs I jumped down and landed with a roll. Note to self get rope installed. I used one of my ears to push the button. When the door opened at the bottom I was happy to see that the secretary was the same pony from before, more importantly she was talking to Sunny. They both looked up as I stepped out. I was barely winded despite my short legs and swift run. “We have a problem.” “So there’s a giant carnivorous bird somewhere in or near the city and it already killed somepony.” I pulled out my sketches “That’s about the gist of it. I don’t know if we have an official R&D department if we outsource it to some local company. I had hoped these could be on the backburner for a little while but with this development I think it needs to be a top priority. They’re called battle saddles; I’ve only sketched basic designs to be used for two of the guns so far but from these I hope we can have somepony else design some better ones.” “All things considered these are quite good.” She passed them to an aide “We’ll have the fabrication department get to work immediately. In the meantime what do you suggest we do about our mysterious avian friend?” “We aren’t doing anything. I’m going to spend the night outside playing a game.” I hadn’t been expecting a prototype for at least three days. They had one in three hours. They had even set up a firing range in an unused section of HQ for testing. For the first time in who knew how long at least some of these guns would finally see use again. But before that I had to teach them about firearm maintenance so they could teach it to the ponies the finished saddles would be issued to. That took several hours for two reasons. One, I wanted to make sure they knew how to do it properly. And two, I was unfamiliar with the exact method used to field-strip these weapons. Next I taught them basic firearm safety. Then the testing began. “I think they’re great so far.” I said “Oh there’s plenty of room for improvement.” A tan mare spoke up “We can increase the saddles durability and stability while still keeping it easy and quick to don.” “It needs to be kept small enough and light enough to not be unwieldy. The wearer needs to be as nimble and accurate as possible in battle.” “But they’re just so…so ugly” another mare said “we can definitely make them look so much cuter. Paint them a nice bright color” I rounded on her “No!” she flinched “Let me explain something very very important. These are weapons of war; they are design to kill the enemy. Look at this M107A1. There is not a single decorative, ornate, or unnecessary line used in its construction. It is all function and no fashion. That’s how the saddles are going to be done. If the user doesn’t like its natural brown then they can have it in any color they want as long as it’s black.” “Oh…” she said sadly I thought for a few minutes “Actually, there is a project you could work on. We have body armor and I need it redesigned to fit ponies. When it’s done I want it to be as indistinguishable as possible from a regular, albeit less bulky, uniform. Think you can do that for me?” She perked up “Yes ma’am!” “Good, make sure you get current information on the saddles. If it’s possible to have them worn together without compromising their functions or pony mobility then that’s what I want.” We ate lunch as we worked. Before we knew what happened I had started almost a dozen new projects. I had expected everypony to upset about being given extra work. I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. Most of them were delighted by the prospect of having new and innovative work to do. After lunch work began on the battle saddle’s second prototypes so I had the range all to myself. This was good since I needed to learn how to use my attacks. But, more importantly I wanted to see if I could use them without having to say them. With some practice I found that it WAS possible, but it was a lot hard to do. I also learned a neat trick with Blazing Ice, rather than a barrage of small pellets I could make a single shaped one, granted it was still small but being able to shape it opened up some new possibilities. When night finally came it was time to put my brilliant plan into action. But first I had to wait for Rosy to fall asleep, and then I had to make sure she actually was asleep before slipping out of the room. Once outside I started wandering around looking for a place to hide. I ended up in a nice park, some good sized trees, plenty of bushes, and it was relatively quiet. I crawled into one of the bushes and sat down to wait and listening for the tell tale sound of wing beats. I sat there for hours but when I finally heard something it made the bottom drop out of my stomach. “I’m telling you your weird new friend is around here somewhere.” That was Golden Wonder “But why would she be out here in the middle of night?” and that was Rosy “She’s YOUR weirdo friend you tell me.” It looked like I would have to scrap the mission and try again later. I crawled out of my hiding place and walked over to them. The crickets were chirping pleasantly. That was a good sign if ever I heard one. “Inaba what are you doing out here? We should be at home, asleep!” “Where are those Marshals? They should be here by now.” Golden muttered to herself “I wasn’t aware that I was doing anything wrong.” “The Marshals declared a curfew until further notice. YOU’RE going to get in SO much trouble when they get here.” She was grinning “You mean we.” “What.” Her smile was gone, replaced with a frown and a glare “A curfew applies to everyone and everypony.” “What does that have to do anything?” “You’re out after curfew just like me so you’ll be in just as much trouble.” “My mommy can get me out of anything they try to do. You on the other hoof don” “Ssshhh!” “Did you just” “Sssshhh!" it had gone silent "Do you hear that?” She looked around “I don’t hear anything.” “No crickets, no bugs, nothing.” Rosy said They couldn’t hear it but I could, the flapping of giant wings. “Stay behind me.” Above somewhere, which direction? “Like I’m going to listen to you.” “If you don’t there’s a good chance that you’ll die.” I took a deep breath, in through the nose, condense the pellets into a single one, picture the shape and breathe out. There was a crack as the Sears-Haak body shaped ice pellet passed from transonic to supersonic speed. The few clouds overhead were shredded as it passed near them. There was a squawk of pain and spray of blood as my shot clipped whatever kind of raptor was in the sky. “What in Tartarus did you just do!?” Golden Wonder shrieked “It must have black feathers.” I mumbled “What has black feathers?” Rosy asked “Whatever the hell it is up there.” The sounds changed, it was heading straight for us, no time to debate this with myself. In a flash I was Antylamon and I learned I had night vision. It was a giant bird with a cruel curved beak. So called it hooray for nature documentaries teaching me everything. I was also right about it being big, as in the same size as me big. My foot shot up in a roundhouse kick hitting it in the face, as I pivoted it was sent sprawling across the ground. Unfortunately I couldn’t go after it like I originally planned to since I now had to guard to two fillies. So rather than fighting I’m defending. “Bunny Blades,” snap, language is non-issue apparently “stay behind me girls.” It took to the sky again quickly gaining altitude. It began circling looking for an opening but I turned with it keeping the fillies at my back. It took a steep angle and dove at us. I swung with my left axe and landed a solid slash across its head knocking it off balance. I brought my right axe straight up cutting clean through its wing, bone and all. With its balance wrecked it tilted to the left and plowed head first into the ground. Now we were on a more even playing field. It stood unsteadily on its taloned feet wobbling as it tried to find its balance, the fact that it was bleeding heavily wasn’t helping it either. It was now more angry than hungry because it lunged at me trying to gouge out my side with its beak. There was the unpleasant sound of breaking bone as it splintered against my Red Chrome cuirass. I swung low cutting one of its legs out from under it. As it fell I struck the killing blow using both axes to cut its head off. I let my hands change back as I caught my breath. That was the first time I had ever really killed anything. Sure I’d squished my fair share of bugs but I don’t think anyone really counts them. Looking down at myself I could tell I was splattered in blood, even if I could see its color, stupid rod cells. I looked behind me to check on the girls. Golden Wonder had fainted, no surprise. Rosy on the other hand was staring at me with wide eyes. I heard ponies coming galloping in our direction. That must be The Marshals, well better late than never. At least that’s how the saying goes. A Sears-Haak body is a type of aerodynamic shape, its VERY cool.Rod cells are the simpler cells that make up the retina, they let you see in the dark/low light and are also the cause of peripheral(sp?) vision more info here. Yes rabbits can see in the dark and do often hear their predators coming, those big ol ears ain't just for show folks.