Chapter Twenty Nine:Of Dinner Plans and Romantic Demands
Written by TheCrimsonDM
Rarity sat in a bathtub in PInkie's room as the pink bubbly mare took an unprecedented kindness and gentleness with brushing her mane. A mane that had up until her hasty retreat smelled of cat urine, had chunks missing from it, and some bloodstains, she was not sure where the blood came from but between swinging every object available at a literal horde of pissed off cats who were all trying to have sex in her room as well as fight with each other and her, well... honestly this was not what she'd call this a good morning.
The upstairs balcony doors opened and Fluttershy came trotting down the steps. "I got them all under control and out of your house. I um... I'm not sure but I think that might have been the entire population of cats in Ponyville. I counted sixty-eight of them."
Rarity grumbled. "Well, I'm glad you decided to sit there and count them. Now, how did they get in there? Did Discord do this to me?"
Fluttershy shook her head. "I already asked him. Instead, he implied something that made me shiver... you might need to leave town for a few years."
Rarity glared at her. "Now why would I dare to leave town? For a few years at that."
"He um, implied that Twilight might have discovered her son's innocence was um... taken by a certain alabaster mare."
Pinkie Pie butted in. "Ooooo you’re in trouble."
Rarity swallowed. "I see... missing some of my hair, covered in cat urine and scratches that I am fairly certain are already infected and left a trail of blood all over my house... And now I need a professional cleaner for my home."
Fluttershy nodded. "You'll need an expert cleaner for your home. It's going to be expensive."
Rarity swallowed. "Honestly, I think I got out lucky all things considered. So long as Twilight's wraith does not extend from this point or becomes any worse, I think I can still live here. Should it get any worse I will be taking the first train to who knows where."
Pinkie Pie made a suggestion. "My family down south would take you, they're pretty good at taking in mares in bad places and helping them out."
"Thank you, darling, but if I wanted to work as a slave on a rock farm, I would have stayed with the diamond dogs."
Pinkie Pie frowned. "Hey, that's mean."
"It's true and I think Trixie agrees, but... I'm sorry if it offended you."
Fluttershy leaned over the tub and sniffed Rarity a few times. Her nose crinkled. "O-oh, um... PInkie, use the double strength shampoo."
Pinkie Pie giggled. "She still smells bad? I think I got used to it."
"N-not bad... just um... musky."
Rarity groaned. "Honestly, did Twilight seriously use every single cat in Ponyville? Did my transgression warrant that much effort?"
Fluttershy stared at her. "Um... yes. Yes it did."
Pinkie Pie nodded. "Despite knowing how dragons age and breed and stuff, I back up Fluttershy on this. You probably deserved a lot worse. I mean, if you'd tried that with my sister Marble, I might have turned you into cupcakes and fed you to your family."
Both Rarity and Fluttershy stared at Pinkie in silence for a long hard minute.
Pinkie Pie giggled. "Kidding. I'd be upset, but if Marble trusted you enough to have sex, well then I'd be proud of her. She's only ever had sex with one pony before."
Fluttershy swallowed. "Isn't this the same sister that has never once seen a pony besides your family?"
Pinkie Pie nodded. "Yeppers, oh wait, I suppose she did meet Trixie. But it wasn't with Trixie."
Rarity cleared her throat. "Pinkie, we are tabling this discussion now and forever. Please do not ever bring up the idea of your sisters having sex again."
Pinkie Pie giggled. "Okay, well I'll just do as I've always done and keep it in the family then."
Rarity groaned again. "Noooo, Pinkie, shut up! You’re ruining me with your incest."
Pinkie Pie shrugged. "Eh, it's not for everypony. We should probably ask Applejack more about it. I hear the apples don't fall too far from the trees if you catch my drift."
Rarity stared at Fluttershy. "Please, help me, I think I'm a prisoner here."
Fluttershy rolled her eyes. "No, you can stay. You deserve this."
"Noooo. this is the worst possible thing."
Fluttershy looked over to Pinkie. "Um, Pinkie, Rainbow Dash is willing to try us."
Pinkie's eyes widened. "As in all three of us?"
Fluttershy nodded. "Yes, but we should move a little slow. She's not comfortable with it."
"Got it, no double teaming Rainbow until after she's used to it."
Fluttershy nodded again. "That's about it."
Rarity leaned back in the bathwater and let her mouth go underwater so she could blow bubbles of frustration. Why was it, that on her day off, when she got to sleep in, that everything had to go so right with everypony else but so horribly for her.
***
Celestia leaned back in her chair at the breakfast table. Before her a morning feast unlike any other. From apple pie, to pancakes, and even a delightfully pink cake in the center of the table. It was everything she could ask for in the morning. From across the table, she saw Luna sitting there already muzzle deep into some pancakes. It was such a peaceful morning and her thoughts were drifting back to the day before. Now she was engaged to two ponies. Not something she hadn't done before, but still better than her harem which she disbanded a good few hundred years back out of boredom. Yet for the first time in her life, she was intrigued by the prospect. It turned out with just enough alcohol Twilight was quite the little firecracker, and she wanted to know more about what was in that mare's heavily guarded brain.
Of course, there was still the concern of Trixie. Seeing her again had stirred some older memories and painful experiences. Hearing that Trixie's memories were a lot worse than she knew was terrible. It had to be done to save Trixie's mind, to save her soul right? Removing those memories of Shadow Heart, his teachings, his kindness, his friendship, all of it had to go to make sure Trixie was safe right? Yet as it always did, memory spells faltered, and Trixie could start remembering things soon. She'd have to keep a close eye on her so she could keep that secret down.
Yes, she could see herself spending more time with Twilight. After all, it was just a single teleport for her to go there and come back. In all honesty, it was like Celestia had blinked and days turned to months, and months turned into well over a year. How long had it been since she spent the kind of quality time she needed to with Twilight?
Too long. As her adopted mother, future betrothed and mentor it was her job to spend more time with her. So she had already set it up on her schedule to visit at least once a week.
Luna spoke up breaking the train of thought. "Celestia... I'm sorry I broke your castle."
Celestia offered a kind smile. "It's okay, dear sister. It's not like I didn't have a dozen of those things anyway."
Luna swallowed her bite of food and looked down at her plate. "I know you hate it when I play with your toys."
Celestia let out a sigh. "I do... but I'm also possessive so I should really share more. You are my dear little sister after all and I'm sure you won't break all of my things if you play with them. If you'd like you can try lowering my sun again tonight, with my permission this time."
Luna's eyes sparkled. "REALLY!"
Luna looked just as happy as she did the first time Celestia let Luna play with her dolls. Of course unlike that experience, Celestia sincerely doubted that Luna would shatter the fragile porcelain figures by trying to play house. The sun wasn't that fragile after all... hopefully. "Yes, really. I should grow up eventually."
"Oh-oh can I use your private bath too! Your's is bigger than mine."
Now that was crossing a line. "No."
"What if we took a bath together?"
Celestia raised an eyebrow. "I... well if we did, we would have to use mine as yours wouldn't fit the two of us properly."
"Oh good, could I wash your back?"
"Yes, I suppose you could."
Luna's eyes met Celestia's and she recognized the look. "Could I wash other parts of you?"
Celestia swallowed and looked away. "Dear Luna, aren't you forgetting about some handsome stallion you like?"
Luna grumbled. "Curses, you remembered that after all."
"I am not one to easily forget such things. Now tell me, have you spoken to Big Mac yet?"
Luna lowered her head. "I've wished him good dreams a few times...."
"What about a one on one conversation? Anything from the weather to what he likes most about you?"
Luna shook her head. "No... I'm afraid he won't like me."
Celestia rolled her eyes. "Assuming he is not gay, which I will never make the mistake of ruling out a sixteenth time, I am sure he would love to speak with you."
"Really?"
"Really."
Luna beamed. "So I get to raise the sun, take a private bath with you washing all of your body with mine, and talk to Big Mac. I am overjoyed dear sister, I do not deserve to be so happy."
Celestia chuckled. "Of course you deserve all of those things. You are a wonderful, beautiful- wait did you just say you'd wash my body with yours?"
Luna stood up on her hind legs declaring, "My entire body shall be a sponge for you, covered in soapy water bubbles to be rubbed quite vigorously against your flesh."
Celestia’s face hooved. "Great.... well it wouldn't be the first time."
"And it shall not be the last." Luna stated as she rested her forelegs on the table. The smile she wore was so wide and playful, it was a smile Celestia would cherish until the end of time. "I can already sense it, your dry old bones are starting to come to life with sexual energy again. THis shall be so much fun. Assuming I am not married soon, we may even start up the harems again."
Celestia stared at her. "I... Luna, you cannot be serious."
"OH, but of course, and I know of some wonderful consorts we can have. I hear the pink pony is free of any entanglements. She could be our cream filling and we her wafer cookies making a delightful treat."
"I'm sorry, but what are you talking about."
Luna smiled. "We're going to make an Oreo cookie with the pink pony, we are the cookies and she is the cream filling sandwiched between us."
A little draconequus appeared on Celestia's shoulder laughing. "It wouldn't be romance if it wasn't complete chaos."
Celestia glared at Discord. "I hate you, I hope you know that."