“Aye Dios Santo Ave Maria what the hell happened? Agh sweet Jesus my head.”
Eduardo woke on the bed of his Ford Super Duty with the hangover from hell early into the afternoon barely able to process the events from the night before.”Oh yeah, I hit 246 two days ago.”
‘Ugh next time I’ll just sleep on the shop floor. Truck beds do hell to the lower back, man why the hell did I think knocking out here was a good idea!?’ ”Oh yeah…ugh fuck it.”
He gathered his bearings and picked himself off the truck not even bothering to close the tailgate. He crossed the warehouse he made into his home and he made his way to the kitchen.
“Alright, Prairie Oyster for me.” He picked up a glass and set it on the table before proceeding to the condiments cabinet to gather the following; Worcestershire sauce, salt, black pepper, and Tabasco sauce. Taking these ingredients he sets them next to the glass before setting off to the fridge to get the piece de resistance; one egg. He gently cracks open the egg and lets the yoke slide to the bottom following up with mixing the ingredients he gathered beforehand.
“Down the hatch.” He drinks the concoction with minimal pleasure but satisfying results soon after. Two furry bodies then brushed up against his leg. ”Morning boys. You hungry?” He poured food and water for his pets. He checks his watch; 2:34 P.M “Alright its Friday I’m over my bender and my hangover. Its gonna be a good day.”
A sudden realization came to him.
”Whats that smell?”
“Ah’m not too sure ‘bout this Twilight.”Applejack sighed in disapproval.
“Yeah same here.”Rainbow said.
“I agree with Applejack and Rainbow.” Rarity sitting alongside Fluttershy.
“…Likewise.” Fluttershy’s avoiding direct eye contact from the obviously sleep deprived Twilight.
“I plea the 5th!” Pinkie Pie said aloud.
Twilight has spent the last two days researching other planets that can sustain life similar to the lands of Equestria with mixed results. However she along with the help of Luna were able to find such a planet. Unfortunately it was quite a distance away and little known is about said planet other then the fact that 72% of it is covered in water and has a moon circling around it and the planet circling around a sun. Nothing like the world of the candy colored ponies where the two Deity Goddesses control the sun and the moon. She also noted the differences between the indeginous of said planet and Equestria. She just explained to her friends that she was planning on teleporting to that planet. Of course they aren’t exactly being open minded about the idea.
“It just ain’t natural and downright freaky.” Applejack stated.
“Yeah I mean the whole planet is like the Everfree Forest! Who knows what could be on there.”Rainbow voicing her concerns for her unicorn friend.
Twilight hadn’t anticipated this much resistance but she would not be swayed. Her mind was made up and by Celestia’s Beard she will see it through.
“Come on girls for all we know there could be so much intelligent life on there. For two days there are areas the glow during the night. Aren’t you the slightest bit curious as to how its done? Also there are metal-like objects that circle the planet. Don’t you want to know what those are?”
“Darling there is a difference between curiosity and just plain old walking into trouble. I have no doubt that the mass population are friendly but you have to consider the possibility that they might not.”
Rarity as well as the other 4 ponies gathered in the observatory tries to debate the next course of action when Spike steps in.
“Do I have a say in this?”Spike asks.
“Well you’re as a part of this as I am so you can freely speak your mind.”Twilight gestures with her hoof to speak.
Spike inhales and exhales slowly gathering his thoughts before he begins. ”I say we go and see whats going on there. I mean if anything we can always come back right? And if we get into trouble there is nothing stopping me from writing to the princesses. Especially since the planet contains the same properties and elements to sustain life as it does here. I mean with oxygen and water there is bound to be vegetation that can sustain us in case something does go wrong; knock on wood.”
The six ponies blankly stare at Spike with Applejack’s mouth slightly ajar.
“What? I live in a library and organize for a living. Hey, just because I’m a baby dragon and I enjoy my long naps doesn’t mean I don’t like reading. Besides I looked over Twilight and Luna’s notes and everything seems to add up so I say we do it and hope for the best.”
“Well I’m sure glad to see somepony other than Twilight and Luna enthusiastic about this experiment.” Much to everypony’s surprise Celestia’s regal figure slipped into the room during their discussion.
“Although with what Spike is saying is technically true there is no guarantee that all life on that planet is friendly however still worth the journey. I believe going through with this can make your bonds that much stronger, I mean the six of you managed to save Equestria twice and not many ponies have nearly the same strength of friendship as yours.”
“So what do you think we do to get ready?”Rainbow curiously asked.
In a slightly serious tone she replied. ”Well I looked over Twilight and Luna’s notes as well. I imagine it will take a lot of magic to land on that planet safely. Should come a situation where you need to blend in I think it is also best that you look like the indigenous as well. Twilight, can you describe them for me based on your observations?”
“Oh um yes princess.” Twilight clears the throat.”The population is primarily of ape-like bi-pedal creatures that are hairless save for the tops of their heads for the most part. They are almost always in some sort of clothing covering up their skin which comes in a variety of colors from pale to black and from red to brown. The males of the species usually have their hair shortend and occasionally have facial hair and their bodies are boulder and broader. The females are at most times seemingly fragile or delicate but just as tough as the males if not tougher when needed as well are the bearers of children and can provide equally as much based on my observations. Also worth mentioning that they have only two udders on the upper part of their bodies ranging from different sizes and neither gender has a tail.”
“And that’s why we call you egghead…” Everypony laughs at Rainbow’s joke including a blushing Twilight.
“Okay so now that we have that settled how do we decide who goes and who stays?” Rarity asked with genuine concern.
Luna walks in. “We will decide that later but for now what do you say we have some fun first?”
Pinkie interjected. ”Oh oh can we throw a party?”
Within the confines of the warehouse Eduardo can be heard in the machine shop area organizing tools and cleaning the ashes of what used to be a laptop and old motor oil.
“Almost done there asshole?”A voice called out to him.
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch dumbass, whats the rush anyway?”
Jericho, a man standing at 5'11 with a similar build as Eduardo, also his younger cousin, makes it a point to come by unannounced in his spare time whether hes in the neighborhood on duty as sergeant of Miami-Dade’s Police Department, or just to annoy him on the weekends.
“I already told you dipshit, we’re headed over to Club Space.”
“Hermano, the last time I was in ANY club I was sixteen, sober, and we were in the Dominican Republic.”
“Yeah well out of everyone else I can call I can trust you won’t be drinking.”
Eduardo shot him a deadpan look.
“So what are we taking?”
“Well you can be sure its none of my rides.”
“Even the M3?”
“Especially the M3, since I took the back seat out anyway.” Eduardo let out a chuckle.
“What about the bugeye STi?”
“No can do, still waiting on the new shocks to come in. Apparently the suspension it had can’t handle landings at over 130.”
“Only you would find a road that would have a bump worthy enough for the WRC in the FLATTEST STATE IN THE COUNTRY. I told you it wouldn’t end well but no you never listen to me.”
“Go fuck yourself, besides I was looking on swapping that shit set up anyway.”
Jericho let out a chuckle of his own.”How about the black G8 over there?”
“The one with the naked carbon fiber front end the exhaust pipes coming out of the side and Bull Bar?”
Eduardo laughs. “Theres an idea. Its not mine but I gotta take it for a test drive anyway to break in the new fuel rail, injectors, and pump because of that vortec.”
“Whos is it?”
“The carbon fiber I get but why does it have a bull bar?”
“Something about it looking like an undercover cop car. Wonder where he got that idea.”Eduardo looks over to Jericho with a knowing smile.
“Don’t look at me man.”They both laugh.
“Hey I say so long as no one bothers me about it he can install whatever he wants.”
“You should know that hes coming too.”
“No shit? Hmm guess I’m killing two birds with one stone.”
“You know how I love feedback.”
“How can I forget, How does it drive?”
“It handles pretty well to begin with, I just swapped out the sway bars, put in a strut bar under the hood and a strut brace in the rear for a bit more stability in cornering and strengthen the body a bit. All in all for a family sedan its pretty good all around especially with that 6.2 V8 under the hood.”
“Can’t wait to see what he thinks of it.”
“Same here I think it’ll be a good present for when his kid comes around.”
It was decided that Twilight, Spike, and Fluttershy would be the ones to make the journey deciding on a peninsula on one of the continents they chose. In anticipation of their arrival Twilight will cast a spell that would change their appearances the moment they touch down on that planet to not raise an alarm, unfortunately not much could have been done for Fluttershy’s wings seeing as how she has always had them. Rarity prepared the trio with some casual clothes and shoes for them to wear upon their arrival. For record keeping and communication purposes Spike will tag along. Fluttershy is going in case of injury despite her many doubts and fear of heights.
Needless to say everypony was nervous about the event to take place. Nothing like this has ever been tried before and with the sheer amount of magic it will take to teleport the three to this new world could seriously harm Twilight if she loses focus for just a moment.
Everypony closed in for a group hug assuring each other that everything would be okay and they would see each other soon enough. Pinkie held on to them the longest.
With a gentle smile Pinkie looked at the trio.“Pinkie Pie swear you’re coming home safely?”
In unison they chanted and did the motions.”Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye.” Letting out small giggles at the end.
“Oh do be careful you three, knowing you I know you will but…Oh.” She pulled the three in for another hug.
The yellow pegasus was shaking nervously and Rainbow pulled her in for a hug. ”Don’t worry Fluttershy with Twi and Spike with you nothing can go wrong besides its only going to be for a little while.”
“I know Dashie, just that after learning that the whole planet is like Everfree…eep” Tears began to well up in her eyes.
“Don’t worry everything will be fine. Just believe in yourself and in case there are any bad things out there nothing can prepare them for your famous Stare.” Applejack gave her a confident smile. A small smile found its way on Fluttershy’s face.
Managing to bring up Fluttershy’s spirits and able to calm her down she turned to join where Twilight and Spike were waiting.
Spike, Twilight and Fluttershy nodded.
Celestia approached the three.“I bid you a safe journey and a safe return.” They bowed to each other before gaining some room between them and the observatory while the others watched from a distance.
Twilight was the first to speak.“Okay grab on to me, focus on our destination, and hang on tight.”As twilight closed her eyes she began to focus her energy and within seconds all three were enveloped in her violet aura. Spike and Fluttershy focusing just as hard they began to levitate off the ground beneath them. Twilight beginning to visualize their landing zone. Just like that Twilight opened her eyes then with a flash and a boom they were on their way.
“First time I go clubbing in 12 years and I end up getting stuck driving my cousins home in the middle of a storm. Typical Miami weather, like a woman that can’t make up her mind about something.” He laughed to himself at the last comment. ”Well at least I got to have some fun tonight, long time since I cut a rug like that.”
While Eduardo was lost in his thoughts he saw a sudden flash from his right side. He contemplated for a moment. At first he just thought it was a lightning bolt striking the ground and wanted to leave it at that. He had a good night, he didn’t want to ruin it getting into something he would get himself in trouble over. Though a moment later curiosity won over his better judgment.”Well a little adventure never hurt anyone I mean if things get hot I’ve got 650 horses on tap and the skill to put it down on the wet pavement.”
However something else was bothering him. Its as though it was calling for him. Eduardo hates feelings like these, he knew that with his luck he would undoubtedly get into some sort of trouble. Its for that reason why the only times he would leave the warehouse was to get groceries, workout, and go for a drive late at night. Considering in his profession and his recourses he can work from home if he chose to. Ten minutes later he found himself in one of the rougher parts of Miami. ‘The Opa Locka triangle, great.’ His only comfort factors was the 1911 R1 he had holstered, the Taurus Judge he carried on his ankle and the fact he could reach and shoot both with deadly speed and accuracy. Instead of being sensible about it and turn back home, he decided to let his curiousity die down. As a result he knew in his gut he was headed in the right direction what happened next though he wasn’t ready for.
He stopped for a moment to look inside what seemed like a run down abandoned house. What striked him as strange was that the lights are on because the rest of the neighborhood seems that it was condemned for demolition. Through one of the broken windows he can see two women one pink haired and seemingly terrified for her life and the other purple haired and unconscious being held up by the pink haired women. In front of them is a boy probably in his late-teens with green hair in a defensive stance with fury in his eyes. A moment later he sees what looks like a few of hood rats slowly surrounding them. He knew what came after. Hes kicked the asses of enough creeps, low lives, and thugs in his life to know what these men were after. It angered him.
He backed up into the driveway of the house across the street pointing the nose of the car directly to the room where those women and kid were in. For a moment he considered getting a bull bar on his bugeye STi before shifting to 1st and flooring the throttle letting the V8 roar with all of it glory with the whine of the supercharger feeding all that power to the screeching rear wheels. He was able to get a good 30mph in when he broke through the cinderblock constructed wall. With everyone inside stunned he immediately got out of the car and proceeded to kicking ass.
He counted 6 men one came at him from the right before he could throw a punch Eduardo landed his heel on the man’s knee cap resulting in a sickening crack and a scream of pain. Another came at him with a crowbar in his left hand about to strike him. He grabbed the man’s wrist with his left hand twisting it causing him to lean forward and dropping the crowbar. He then put his right palm firm and planted the palm of his hand directly on his elbow dislocating it and numbing him enough to put him on the floor. The next one was to his left with a fixed-blade knife out coming at him. ’Now I’m getting pissed.’
He stepped to the left dodging the blade and landed a solid right hook on his jaw knocking him on the ground and to make sure he stayed that way he stomped on his ribs hard enough to feel a crack from the heel of his right foot. He then noticed one of the thugs reaching for his lower back. Without a moments hesitation he grabbed for his 1911 disengaging the safety aimed down the sights and fired a single round at his right shoulder and another at the glock he pulled out instantly destroying it. The other two thugs stopped in their tracks with the weapon aimed at them. “I just took down 4 of your buddies and I have 7 more rounds in this, now before you try anything else. Ask yourself, Do I feel lucky? Well, DO YOU? PUNKS!” Both high tailed it out of the house disappearing into the darkness While the others followed suit one carrying the guy who got his knee dislocated.
Eduardo turned to the women and teen in the corner, the teen in front was scared but still standing in front of the unconscious woman and the pink haired one holding on to her. He looked around to survey the damage and holstered the pistol. Car in the living room, check. 4 downed bad guys in pain or out cold, check. Two brass .45acp casings, check. “C’mon get in the car.” He picked up the brass casings deciding he’ll toss them in a dumpster on the way back to the warehouse.
The teen was on the verge of tears, the pink haired woman far beyond that point. “No way!”
“Its not up for debate kid get your ass inside unless you want to be in more trouble than you already are and if the cops come by here you don’t want to be the one that’s pinned for what happened to these jackasses never mind the two behind you.”
“Say we don’t.”
Eduardo shot him a stern look.
“Then its your ass.”
Realizing that he was serious Eduardo watched the teen run to the car and hopped in though the driver’s side and finally sit in the back seat. He moved towards the two women.
“C’mon get in the car we’ll take her with us.” He finds that shes already fainted. ‘Dammit all.’
He went back to the car and opened up the passenger doors.
“Kid I need you to scoot over alright.” He complied.
He picked up the purple haired woman first and gently placed her in the back seat and buckling her seatbelt. After closing the door he went back to the pink haired woman to do the same. The teen could only watch. After closing the front door did he notice a couple of bags on the sidewalk. “Kid are those yours?”He looked at the bags and nodded.”Okay wait here don’t move.” He got the bags and put them in the trunk before strapping himself in.
After leaving the scene behind them with Eduardo at the wheel the ride was silent save for the wurring of the supercharger and the car’s aggressive exhaust note. It car barely had any cosmetic damage save for a busted headlight, nothing he couldn’t fix. Needless to say he was pretty thankful for that bull bar. If it wasn’t there for that the little rescue attempt he just pulled off would have cost him alot more than a busted headlamp. In the end though it wouldn’t have made a difference and he knew it.
The teen spoke.”Where are you taking us?”
“A-are they going to be okay?”His voice full of concern.
“They seem to be fine, probably just shocked, tired or both. In any case though I’m going to call a friend to check on them don’t worry shes someone you can trust. She has sewn me up a couple of times over the years.”
“…I’m sorry for earlier.”
“Not your fault, it was the heat of the moment and you were only protecting them. You should be proud of yourself kid. You must be really close.”
"About those guys..."
"What about them?"
"Are they gonna be okay?"
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Out of the three of you why are you the only one wearing any clothes?”
“It’s a long story.”
“Oh, okay we’ll talk about it tomorrow then, its been a rough night on all of us. This isn’t exactly how I wanted to spend my Friday night either you know.”
The drove to a stop light not too far from his home and he noticed in his rear view mirror that the teen was still pretty worried.
“Hey, cheer up man, no one got hurt except the jerks from earlier. I’ve been in your shoes on more than one occasion. You impressed me back there.” Suddenly he comes to a realization. “Oh where are my manners…”He Looked into the rear view mirror again to see the kid leaning on the woman next to him.”…The names Eduardo. Whats yours?”
He looked into the mirror to meet Eduardo’s eyes. “Spike, my name is Spike.”
“Nice to meet you Spike.” ’Must be a nickname.’ “Uh, spike.”
“I noticed wings on this one.” He gestures toward the pink haired woman.
“Yeah, those are real.”
“Aha.” He inhales. “Yeah I’m definitely gonna need a drink.”