It was summer, and that meant that every single tree on the property was bright and green. My ignorance over how fast young colts would overheat led me to keep them mainly in the shade.
Our walk stopped when Líng ran off to the side and examined some flowers. "Look at the pu gong ying!"
Sinker looked at the yellow flowers. "Those are just dandelions."
I stepped over and examined them. They were indeed dandelions. "The same flower can have different names depending on where you are from. We sometimes called them puffballs when I was little."
"Mom cooks them up with vinegar for dinner sometimes," Sinker said.
That didn't surprise me. "She did that when my sisters and I were little too. She would have us all out gathering dandelions, wild lettuce, and crabapples for hours. Back then, we sometimes couldn't afford much food, and she taught us how to make crabapple preserves, dandelion salad, and we would have sliced up hot dogs or spam in either macaroni and cheese or with boiled wild lettuce."
"We still have that, except she does bunches of different flowers, but I don't think she uses hot dogs. What kinda flower is that? And isn't spam like emails? How do you eat emails?" Sinker asked.
"Spam originally referred to a type of cheap canned meat. Hot dogs are meat too. You haven't heard of hot dogs?" I asked in amazement.
Sinker went wide-eyed. "Ponies used to eat dogs?!"
"There were no ponies when Auntie was little, Stupid," Shǔguāng huffed. "Everyone was human."
I facehooved. "Shǔguāng… you are just banned from using the word stupid, period, and every one of its synonyms."
"What's a synonym?" Líng asked.
"Words that mean the same thing," I answered the youngest colt. I then turned back towards Shǔguāng. "You need to be nicer to everyone. Would you like people calling you mean names all the time?"
Shǔguāng looked down. "I wouldn't care," he mumbled.
"Well, I do," I said in a stern tone. I looked at Sinker. "And for the record, hot dogs aren't made out of dogs. I'm not exactly sure what they are made out of and don't want to know, but it isn't dogs."
"But it is made out of animals," Sinker whined, ears and tail sagging low.
I took a deep breath. "Yes, hot dogs and spam are made out of animals. There's nothing wrong with eating animals. Animals do it all the time. It's just nature. Humans eat animals and plants. Even us ponies sometimes eat animals. We can eat insects and spiders, and some ponies have fancy recipes for preparing them into meals."
"Eww! They eat bugs!" Líng said as he made an exaggerated gagging motion.
I wasn't fond of the practice either… especially the spiders, but my daughter and her family ate them, and I would not be judgmental of them. "There's nothing wrong with eating bugs. I'm sure those who know how to cook them do an excellent job. My daughter is a wonderful cook who knows how to cook bugs. Maybe she can cook some for you to try sometime. We will have to visit her, eventually."
"But Rosetta Stone is here. Why do we have to visit her?" Shǔguāng asked in confusion.
"Rosetta is married to my daughter, so she’s my daughter-in-law, not my daughter. Those are two different things. She is also a notorious disaster as a cook.”
That seemed only to confuse the colt more. "But two mares can't get married."
It was a difficult thing to stop my ears from pinning back. I had to force myself not to seem angry.
"Two mares can love each other or two stallions. There's nothing wrong with it," I said without looking directly at the colt.
"I know that," Shǔguāng replied. "Mama had lots of special mare friends. They just can't get married."
I had misread what was going on. They were from China, which was ambivalent about same-sex relationships. They didn't go out and actively punish people for having them. They couldn't care less about the nature of your sexual relationships. However, they didn't grant any legal protections or allow for marriage or adoptions for same-sex couples either. As long as you had your pony babies, they didn't care what relationships you had on the side. From Shǔguāng's understanding, that meant exactly what he said, no more or less. I shouldn't feel so defensive.
"It is different here, in America," I said calmly. "Two mares can get married here. Remember, I told you I had a wife."
"Oh, okay," Shǔguāng replied, instantly accepting what I said without question. I glanced at his brother, but Líng seemed no more bothered by this change of understanding.
"Anyway," I continued. "You should have heard of my daughter, Phobia Remedy, the Dreamwarden of Fear."
Líng flicked an ear. "Mama called Phobia Remedy her sister. So, are you Mama's mama?"
"What?!" That question took me completely off-guard. "No, I'm not. Sister with them is kinda like a title. They aren't really sisters, at least, not blood ones. I don't understand it. My wife is their sister too. They share memories, purpose… I guess a body… if you consider the dream realm their body."
Talking about it made me uncomfortable. How much of Tonya was Yinyu, or my daughter, or that damned bitch Sha'am? She was intertwined with the other current Dreamwardens, and who knew how many that had come before. They weren't entirely separate beings. They were one being with a dissociative identity disorder. Six distinct personalities in one body, just some of those personalities had an extra body to spend time in when awake.
"Families are weird," Líng observed, then went back to looking at dandelions.
"Do you know who our Ba is?" Shǔguāng suddenly asked.
That was yet another question that froze me up. How do I explain delicately that they all had different fathers, and even their mother was unsure who each of those fathers were? I suppose all I could do was be honest.
"I'm sorry, but I don't know," I said apologetically. "Each of you probably has different dads, even if you all share the same mother. Your mom… she liked a lot of different ponies."
Líng nodded. "Yeah, Mama always had lots and lots of special friend ponies. We had to stay out of her room when she had special friends visiting. She had a sign. Do you have special friends, Auntie? Sister had a couple of different special friends for a little while; then she stopped having them visit."
"My wife was my special friend and my ex-husband before her," I replied. "You don't need to worry about them visiting and you not being allowed in my room." Time to leave the not age-appropriate conversation. "Anyway, I'd like to teach you all the recipes my mom taught me, minus the meat. Maybe in a few days, we can all come out and gather up dandelions and crabapples. There might be some wild lettuce around here too. Everyone should learn how to make mac n' cheese. It's almost an essential life skill."
Sinker decided he wanted to hit me with another tricky question. "You, Mom, and Dad keep saying we have more sisters. Is that true?"
The edges of my mouth curved downward. "Yes, it's true. I don't know much about them either. I haven't seen either in over thirty years. The last time I saw both in one place was my high school graduation. I used to be the youngest until you came along, and you'd better stay the youngest. If Mom has another foal after you, I'm going to have a cow."
"What are you going to do with a cow?" Líng asked.
"Are you going to eat the cow?" Sinker asked nervously.
"Auntie doesn't eat cows anymore. She will milk it," Shǔguāng said confidently.
"Can the cow be our pet?" Líng asked in a hopeful tone.
I stared upwards at the tree branches, reminding myself these were kids. "There will be no cow. It's just an expression. You watch Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtles; I'm pretty sure they use that expression at some point. It means I'm going to be very mad and upset."
I would definitely be mad and upset. I loved my parents, but they were in their eighties. It was a sad thing to think about, but there was a strong possibility that they would not see Sinker reach adulthood as it was. They might be in the best physical shape you could hope to be in for that age, but that was still a hefty age. Did they have a plan for what happened to him if time caught up with them? Who was going to take care of him? Who was going to help him cope when they passed? I had an understanding that they were living on borrowed time; Sinker didn't. My mother might still be ovulating and feeling frisky, thanks to ETS resetting her biological clock, but if she got pregnant again, I was going to have some choice words with her.
"How about we discuss you guys," I said in a cheerful tone that I wasn't feeling. "I know so little. When are your birthdays?"
"Mine is August twenty-first, which is next month!" Sinker announced proudly. "I'll be turning seven!"
I looked at him in shock. "Really? August twenty-first? That's my birthday too."
"How old will you be? A million plus one?" Sinker asked.
"I'll be fifty plus one," I muttered. "I'm your big sister, and you should be nicer about my age."
"Mama said I was born in the year of the snake," Líng announced. "I was born on the third day of the ninth month of the third year."
"And I was born on the twelfth day of the second month of the second year. I'm a dragon! Dragons are better than snakes!" Shǔguāng said haughtily.
I blinked. "Um… you wouldn't happen to know what those dates translate out to in my calendar, do you?"
"You have a different calendar?" Shǔguāng asked in confusion.
I fluttered my lips. "Yes, I do, and I'm guessing that's a no on you being able to translate that over. It sounds like China reset its calendar after ETS. Maybe your sister can help me figure out your birth dates. I do know what my Chinese zodiac symbol is. I'm a monkey."
"Sister is a monkey too," Shǔguāng said. "And Mama is a rabbit."
Certainly had sex like one. I thought to myself.
"What am I?" Sinker asked, seeming unhappy to be left out of the whole Chinese zodiac discussion.
"Well, assuming you are born in the same year as Shǔguāng, you would be a dragon too," I said.
"Being a dragon is cool!" Shǔguāng exclaimed happily.
Sinker gasped. "Like Spike the Brave and Glorious?"
"Like who?" I asked.
"You know, Spike, Princess Twilight's helper," Sinker informed me. "He saved the Crystal Empire twice! I met him once. He told all the foals in Pony Hope about it."
"Mama said snakes are intelligent and wise," Líng said, not to be outdone.
"She said dragons are strong, confident, and charming," Shǔguāng listed off, making this a competition.
"And what is a monkey?" I asked, mildly curious, but also eager to stop them from arguing about whether snakes or dragons were better.
Shǔguāng looked down. "She said monkeys learn really fast, faster than any other animal, and are crafty, but they are also very grumpy." He gave me a sheepish smile. "But you aren't always grumpy. That's more like Sister."
I could get much more than merely grumpy. I found the description to be very spot on. I didn't believe in astrology, but sometimes the vague descriptions could line up nicely.
My phone started ringing.
Shǔguāng's ears sagged. "Auntie has to do other stuff again."
That made me hesitate. I didn't want them to feel like I was always putting them off. I was out here specifically because I wanted to spend more time with them, get to know them better, let them see how much I cared about them.
The phone kept ringing.
Líng gave me a concerned look. "Is something wrong?" He came over and hugged me. "You look sad."
Having him hug me felt good. I didn't want to have to answer the phone, but if someone was calling me, it was almost certainly important. I didn't get random calls from telemarketers, and I certainly didn't have any job that would be calling. It could have something to do with ensuring their safety.
I gently brushed his mane. "Just let me see who it is, and if it’s not important, it can wait." I raised my leg and answered the phone. "Sunset Blessing here."
"Hi, Auntie Sunset!" an enthusiastic filly's voice came over the line.
My eyes narrowed. "Jordan? Why are you calling me? How did you even get my number?"
"I wanted to call Alfie, Charlotte, and Tabby, because I'm bored, and I know they were visiting you. Mom has to do student-teacher conferences, Dad is working late, and Jackie is off having a sleepover with her friends, and I'm stuck here at Phobia's house with nobody to play with. I'm super bored! The boredest bored that ever boreded!" Jordan mournfully and dramatically explained.
Deep breaths. "Jordan, honey, we are in a different time zone. That means that it is earlier here than over there. The demons aren't awake yet. How did you get this number??"
"Phobia had it written down in a notebook, and I found it because I was bored. Really bored," Jordan said in a despondent voice.
I resisted the urge to facehoof. "How about this… I can give you Jess's dad's phone number. She is here, with him, and I'm sure she would love to hear from her best friend."
"Jessie's there?!" Jordan shrilly screamed over the line, making me and all the foals pin our ears back in pain. If Phobia was asleep before, she was sure to be awake now. Crystal was probably going to be charging in there any minute to see who was dying.
"She goes by Jess now, and she's here. I take it you want to talk to her," I said as I flexed my ears to try to clear the ringing.
"Yes, please, Auntie," Jordan replied in a much calmer voice like she hadn't just been trying to break my eardrums.
I took the time to tell her the phone number and promptly hung the phone up. That filly could be sweet, but rather excitable at times. She had been very quiet and introverted just a few years ago, but had come out of her shell as of the last year and a half. Considering the events she had been through that would have left an adult with PTSD, and that those events were unequivocally my fault, I should be happy that she still seemed well-adjusted and didn't hold any resentment or hate towards me.
"Who was that?" Shǔguāng asked. My ears perked. Did I detect a strong hint of jealousy in his tone?
I gave a reassuring smile. "That was Jordan. She is my ex-husband's daughter… she's family. Jordan is the same age as you and Sinker. A nice little lavender unicorn filly with a yellow mane."
"She called you Auntie," Shǔguāng continued. Ah, that was what this was about. That was supposed to be our special word.
I tried to give him an even more reassuring smile than the one I just gave him. "If you noticed, Jess calls me that as well. Auntie means different things to different people in the family."
Shǔguāng's ear flicked. "What does it mean to her?"
I walked over to him and pulled him close to me. "Remember how I just told you that you and your brothers have different dads, but you all share the same mom?" Shǔguāng nodded. "Jordan and my daughter Phobia share a dad, but don't have the same mom. Phobia is Jordan's sister. I am Phobia's mother, but not Jordan's, which makes me not fit neatly into normal titles, yet I am still her family, so she calls me Auntie. Do you understand?"
"Maybe," Shǔguāng muttered.
"What about Jess? She isn't even a pony, and she calls you Auntie too!" Líng pointed out.
I pulled him over to me as well. "Jess and her brother Robby's father have a sister named Tonya, and Tonya is my wife. Since I'm married to their aunt, that makes me their auntie."
"And Mama calls Tonya and Phobia sisters, right?" Líng asked as he tried to sort out how everything fit together in his head. "So… what are they to us?"
"That's for you to decide," I said in a low voice. "I could tell you how to classify them, but it is up to you to determine if you want to embrace them as family. It isn't fair to tell you that you need to embrace them as family members if you haven't even met them all yet. I'll try to find time for you to meet everyone, but it seems like you have a lot of my family to get used to who are already here. Let's start with you getting used to them one at a time, like with Sinker here, who is my little brother."
"I'm not little!" Sinker objected.
I chuckled. "I'm sure you'll be taller and stronger than me someday, and you're always going to be my little brother." I gazed down at Líng. "And even though Sinker is my brother, he and I are still getting used to one another too. We only recently found out about one another, and it is a significant age difference between us. You're three years older than your little brother, Méng, and that might seem like a lot. Imagine how it feels to be forty-four years difference in age from your sibling. Your mother isn't even forty-four. I'm closer in age to my parents than Sinker. This is a big adjustment for him and me."
"It's not that big," Sinker said nonchalantly. "Old Sis just needs to teach me how to be a mad scientist!"
"I'm not a scientist; I'm a mage," I reiterated. "I'm sorry, but not sure I'm qualified to make a mage out of an earth pony. That doesn't mean it's not possible, just that I'm not the teacher you need for that." I saw the disappointment on his face. and tried to think of how to cheer him up. "However… if you are interested in mad science stuff, Jess is the person you want to talk to. As for being an earth pony mage… I do happen to know someone who was an earth pony mage, the most powerful earth pony mage there has ever been."
Sinker looked up at me excitedly. "You do? Can you get them to teach me?"
I ruffled his mane. "You're still a little young for that. You can't even fully harness your magic yet, but if you are still interested in a few years when your magic starts maturing, I can try talking to her about you. I can't make any promises because she is a very busy mare, but she may be willing to give some pointers. How about that?"
"Can I be an earth pony mage too?" Líng asked.
I looked at him and nodded. "If your heart's in it when you get older, yes. I was thinking in the meantime I could try signing you up for some swimming classes since you like the water so much. You don't need mature magic to learn to be a great swimmer. Would you like that?"
He grappled me with a big hug without saying anything.
"I take it, that's a yes?" I asked, mildly amused.
"Yes! Thank you, Auntie," Líng exclaimed.
"What about me?" Shǔguāng asked.
I smiled at him. "You can be included in the swim lessons too, and if there is something you have an interest in doing, we can try to set up something for that too and have your brothers included along with you."
He shook his head. "I mean, can you teach me to be a mage? I'm not an earth pony. I'm a unicorn, like you."
I considered him. "I can teach you, but you'll have to wait for your magic to mature as well. Once you get to where you can levitate things without straining yourself, then we can begin lessons. That might be a few years yet, so be patient—and don't hurt yourself by trying to force it. It will come, naturally, in time."
"I can wait," Shǔguāng said stoically as if he was trying to prove to me how reasonable and mature he was.
At that moment, I heard the rain start to hit the canopy of leaves above us. It wasn't falling hard, but it was sudden how quickly it started. The trees blocked out most, but not all the rain.
This did not deter Líng in the least. The little brown earth pony practically leapt out from under the trees into the open and managed to find an exposed patch of dirt in the otherwise grassy yard. Within seconds it was mud. I had no idea how it had turned to mud so quickly and thoroughly—perhaps what little magic Líng had interacted with it somehow. Regardless, the mud had been made, and it was all over him.
I rolled my eyes and gazed at the happy colt frolicking in his preferred weather and muck. I then smirked, lit my horn, gathered up two mud balls with my magic, and then carefully levitated them behind Líng, outside his vision.
Sinker and Shǔguāng watched expectantly, waiting for me to inevitably pelt Líng with the mud like I would a snowball.
They were astonished when I made the two balls go hurtling towards them. After shaking off the mud, they gave me shocked expressions.
Me, I just calmly walked out into the rain, gathered up another mud ball, and then pelted Líng as well. Líng didn't act shocked at all; he knew a challenge when he got it. He started gathering up his own chunk of mud in his hooves and chucked it at me, striking me in the leg.
I gathered up another mud ball and looked at the two still dumbfounded colts standing under the trees, and I gave them a mischievous smile. "You know, you make easy targets if you just stand there with your mouths open. Are you just going to let me get away with muddying you up with no reprisal? If that's the case, I guess it is only between Líng and me who is going to rule the mud pit!"
That they understood, and charged forward into the mud.
Yeah, we were going to get messy, and we'd all need baths, but it would be worth it.