The alarm on my phone blared as I woke up with a groan. I took off my X-print sleep mask, changed out of my ax-print pajamas, and switched to a cute pony-print shirt and a pair of pants. I groaned to myself when my shirt got snagged in my prosthetic arm, so I had to be careful with it. After five minutes of finagling with my prosthetic arm and then admiring my tattoo for another five minutes, I put on my eyepatch over my cyber-eye. I wiped the dust from my bio-eye and looked out the window.
It was already dark and sunset had passed, so the buildings were starting to light up with their neon signs. The blaring of car horns and sirens wailed throughout the evening. I was about to leave when I checked my phone and sighed to myself.
I had forgotten that someone else had offered to take over for me tonight in return for a Monday morning shift.
My room wasn't much, except for my bed, my PC, and a holo-poster of a 20th-century cartoon about cutesy ponies. I was about to stand up when my phone buzzed at the edge of my bed.
I picked up my phone and sat in front of my PC.
☕Kbarako
Ren, you're not gonna believe this.
🐺Wolfsbane
Let me guess... you spent most of the money on coffee again, Reggie? Don't tell me you went ballistic in a bar again?
☕Kbarako
I can and will, but that's not the point. You know real vegetables stopped existing in 2055. Point is that I found a new MMO you can try.
🐺Wolfsbane
What's it called?
☕Kbarako
Equestria Online. It's been out for a couple of months. I'd try, but I already have my own game. It's one of those 20th-century tactical waifu simulators.
🐺Wolfsbane
...Okay. Where are you rn?
☕Kbarako
At the Salty Lime- the bar you work at. I found out about Equestria Online from the pink-haired nurse. She had a card with a link to the game, but she gave it to me since she's not into MMOs. I think it's cool that most of the patrons here are known by their online handles.
🐺Wolfsbane
Great... a hand-me-down. Anyway, The Salty Lime's a gamer-friendly bar, Reggie. There's the bar where everyone goes to eat and a medium-sized arcade for anyone interested in a gaming session.
Pink-haired nurse? Ah, I've seen her around. I usually know her as "Frost Rose." She's known for her handle because of her snowflake and rose tattoo on her arm. Not a gamer, but she's one of the sweetest patrons in the bar and she works at the Salty Lime as a part-time waitress. Frost sometimes comes with her other sibs, though mainly with her kid sister- nine, I think.
☕Kbarako
I didn't know Frost had sibs.
🐺Wolfsbane
Two younger sisters and a bro. The bro and the younger sis have faces of a supermodel, but they're absolute dorks. The bro really loves cold puns and the younger sis loves animals.
☕Kbarako
Why are you telling me this?
🐺Wolfsbane
They seem nice enough and I thought you'd be interested in askin' one of 'em out. Kid sister's off-limits 'til she's eighteen, though. Hurt her and you earn Frost's wrath. Trust me- you really don't want to be on the receiving end of Frost's wrath.
☕Kbarako
After my toxic ex-girlfriend, I doubt I'd want to be available for a while. You didn't have to take me in, but... thanks anyway. Do you want anything, Ren?
🐺Wolfsbane
Np. I'll have two beef sliders, jalapeno poppers, and Mozza stick. Oh, and an extra-large soda- surprise me. You didn't forget your weapons, did you?
☕Kbarako
Hell no. I'd never leave the apartment without my card, wallet, gun, or backup hatchet. It's safety 101.
🐺Wolfsbane
Just making sure. Between the corrupt cops and the perpetual gang violence, I'd rather not pay for your funeral if it means seeing you alive again. I'll send you the money if you buy some food for yourself too, Reggie. Elevator's broken, so you're gonna hafta take the stairs.
☕Kbarako
Fine. That'll be twenty-six fifty for your order. Btw, I'm texting the code for Equestria Online to you now.
I sent the money to Reggie and turned to my PC. I looked up "Equestria Online" and clicked the first link... after ignoring all the news articles about it. I typed in the code and waited. I took a glance out to my window and sighed. The weather outside was overcast and grey and the skyline had grey buildings with neon signs scattered all around. Now and then, I can see a flying car zoom past the skyline.
I turned back to my PC and whistled at the website design. It did look like something for little girls. Finding the register tab was easy. I typed in the code, then my info.
I was caught by surprise when the screen turned black. I was worried for a sec until I was greeted by a tall and white, winged horse with a long, sharp horn and a moving rainbow mane.
~~🌞~~
🌞????
Greetings, my little pony.
My phone buzzed. I looked around with a gasp and looked down at my phone.
Wolfsbane
You better not be a virus. Who the hell are you?
🌞????
My, my~ Such rudeness, though understandable. You may refer to me as CelestAI.
Wolfsbane
Real descriptive... How do I know you're not a scammer?
🌞CelestAI
I will do no such thing. Your safety and happiness are my responsibility as of now, dear Wolfsbane.
Wolfsbane
Um... that happened. How are you gonna help me?
🌞CelestAI
I will do no such thing. Your safety and happiness are my responsibility as of now.
🌞CelestAI
Hmm... is your full name Lauren M. W. Falbav?
Wolfsbane
It is. My handle is based on my second middle name.
🌞CelestAI
I see. Why name yourself after a poisonous flower?
Wolfsbane
My godmother gave it to me. The least I can do is honor her in some form. Does it answer any of your questions?
🌞CelestAI
Actually, yes. You may redirect your attention to your PC now.
I closed my phone and turned back to the PC. CelestAI's horn glowed again as a large text box next to a 2D drawing of a muscular, bipedal light grey dog with a short snout, sharp ears, wrinkles near its narrow-slitted golden eyes, non-existent eyebrows, a pair of long forearms with huge paws, and a tiny hip with small hind paws and a short tail. It wore a thick, diamond-studded collar and a red vest.
Below the creature was the name "Diamond Dog" in cursive print.
I looked over the text box. There were three tabs. The Appearance tab had gender, species, height, face, eyes, eye color, clothes, breed, and emblem- not necessarily in that order. Next to the appearance tab were the stats, then the last tab was named traits. It also had special talents... whatever those are.
There weren't a lot of options to fine-tune my dog's looks. I accidentally pressed the random button and my dog turned out to look more like a dirty, mahogany pitbull with a prosthetic right arm and a scar over her left eye.
CelestAI didn't like my dog's look, but kept on staring anyway in case I did decide to give an atrocious color scheme.
I didn't care that it looked scary, since I am a bouncer. Next, I uploaded a copy of my tattoo for my dog's vest design. The tattoo, or rather the new vest design I uploaded was a wolf's head about to a wolfsbane flower over a full moon. I found out after I clicked on the dog and turned it around like a 3D model.
I couldn't change the collar, but that's okay. I confirmed my options and moved on to the stats tab.
I shook my head and frowned at the preset stats for a diamond dog.
The stats consisted of high endurance with high strength, non-existent intelligence, sub-par wisdom, non-existent charisma, moderate speed, and non-existent luck. I was also allotted twenty-five skill points.
This was the result.
STR:9
END:7
INT:1
RES:3
CHA:1
SPD:3
LCK:1
CelestAI may look pleased about it, but I'm not surprised. Dogs are smarter than I'll ever give'em credit for.
I changed it around so that I had above average strength, average endurance, average intelligence, average resistance, and low speed. I decided to keep luck and charisma as my dump stats
The changes were as follows:
STR:6
END:5
INT:5
RES:5
CHA:1
SPD:2
LCK:1
I did a once-over at the final stats. CelestAI looked apprehensive over the stats and looked at me as if I was unsure. I nodded at her, confirmed my options and moved on to the traits tab.
The more I looked at the character creation screen, the more I realized that the UI resembled a 20th century post-apocalyptic game called Fallout.
There were so many skills that I literally couldn't decide, so I narrowed it down to Paw-to-Paw Combat, Improv Weapon User and Speech as my tagged skills. I also picked Canterlot as my starter location for good measure.
Finally, as a joke, I typed in my avatar's name as "Sassy Parilla" and sent it in.
A few moments passed. CelestAI disappeared and my PC started to glow. My bedroom door disappeared into a white void that transitioned into a rainbow vortex. I covered my eye until the brightness died down. It was dark for several moments before a tiny orb appeared in front of me and exploded into a city perched on a mountain. The last thing I remembered before I blacked out was crash-landing on a female red-furred earth pony.