//------------------------------// // Chapter 21: Not In Any Book // Story: Rise of the Element Gang, Book 2: Friendship Adventures // by Power of Six //------------------------------// Chapter 21: Not In Any Book “How about that?” “Huh?” Applejack’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts. “I’m sorry, what did you say?” “I’m just sayin’ how great it is that all of us had that special connection ‘fore we even met.” She smiled in a fond way. “Really makes ya think, don’t it?” “Yes, um…I suppose it does.” I said unsurely in response, hoping she wouldn’t notice my distraction. Dog, however, didn’t miss a trick. “Somethin’ on your mind, hon?” he asked, concerned. “What? No, nothing. Why would you think that?” My gaze flicked to what I’d previously been thinking about. “Ya just seem kinda…” He followed my gaze and an understanding expression appeared on his face. “Oh, ah see…” “See what?” I asked abruptly. “Ya know full well what.” Dog leant against the table in a self-assured way. Applejack did the same. “Starin’ at him again, huh?” I gave myself a few minutes to think before answering as another horn blew and confetti streamed everywhere, Pinkie bouncing past as she fired her party cannon. We were at another of Pinkie’s parties, this one she had thrown in celebration of our special connection for our cutie marks. As with all of Pinkie’s parties, it was bombastic, entertaining, and fun. I was standing by the punch bowl, watching Dusk as he was in conversation with Fluttershy and Leon across the room. At least I was, until Applejack and Dog seemed to have noticed and came over to talk. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I insisted, sipping my punch and diverting my gaze. “If ya say so.” Applejack shrugged. “So, still say you’re not in love with him?” “I still say.” I responded immediately. I thought the conversation might be going this way. “So what ya say it is then?” “Well… I would say that… I think it’s…” I trailed off, as I couldn’t answer that question. “I don’t know what it might be, but it’s nothing to do with romance.” “Yeah, you’re probably right.” Applejack looked over at where Dusk was. “Hey, look! Dusk and Fluttershy are holdin’ hooves.” “Or Dusk’s holding Fluttershy’s hoof in his claw in this case.” Dog said, looking in the same direction. “What?” Turning my head sharply, I flushed when I saw that Applejack had fibbed and Dusk’s claw was nowhere near Fluttershy’s hoof. “Why did you…?” “ʹCause it’s so obvious ya do.” Applejack said. “Twilight, when are ya just gonna face facts?” “Because I know I don’t! I just can’t!” I said, my voice rising an octave. “Cool it, sugar cube, I’m just sayin’.” “She’s right, Twi.” Dog told me. “Look, ya can try to deny it, but anypony can tell that what you’re feelin’ for Dusk is love of the highest degree. Anypony’d tell ya, any book if ya read it.” “No, they…” I stopped as I thought about what Applejack had just said. “Wait… that’s it!” “What’s it?” “The answer, the solution to my problem!” I beamed at my friend. “You’re a genius, Dog!” “I am?” He was staring at me like I’d gone mad. “Twilight, what are ya thinkin’?” “Oh, you’ll see.” I said confidently. “Because, by tomorrow, I’m going to prove once and for all that I am right and you are wrong.” He appeared to be in some discomfort when he walked in through the door. His walk was a slow, shuffling step and he had a hoof pressed to his head, his eyes rather bloodshot. I thought to try and lift his mood with my good one. “Good morning, Dusk!” I greeted in the cheeriest of spirits. “Lovely day, isn’t it?” “Morning, Twi… Can you try not to talk too loud? I have a splitting headache.” He groaned and clutched his head again. “What’s wrong?” I asked, concerned. “I think I drank too much of Pinkie's punch last night… That’ll teach me to indulge myself.” “I did warn you about that.” I reminded him. “I don’t know what it is Pinkie puts in it, but she says that particular brand has a ‘special ingredient’ added.” “It’s certainly special all right.” he agreed, grimacing in pain. “Ow… It feels like a buffalo stampede in my brain.” “Pinkie punch overdose?” Spike asked, as he came out of the kitchen. “I feel your pain, bro. It’s a killer.” “You can say that again… Ow!” “Hold on, I got just the thing!” He dashed back into the kitchen and I could hear the sounds of bottles clinking together and liquid being poured into a glass. A few seconds later, Spike re-emerged. “Here, try this.” Spike offered, giving him a glass of red liquid, smoking from the top. “Pinkie says it’s the best solution for it and, trust me, it works. Just hold your nose and drink it down in one.” “Okay…” Dusk pinched his nose with magic and swallowed hard. He retched, but managed to keep it down, gasping when he’d got it all down. “By Celestia! What’s in that?” “Trust me, it’s best you don’t know.” Spike warned. “Your headache will be gone in about half an hour, until then…just fight through it.” "Okay, thanks…” He coughed and I could smell a strong spice coming on his breath, making me grimace. “Sorry… a perfect example that the medicine…is worse than the affliction.” “So it seems.” I giggled. “I hope you’ll be okay, just don’t drink that much punch again.” “Don’t worry, I won’t.” he agreed, trying his best to smile. “You seem to be in a good mood today.” “Why shouldn’t I be?” “Might I inquire as to why? Other than contempt that you were right…again.” “I don’t have contempt for you…well, maybe a little bit.” I admitted, with a giggle. “I thought as much.” he replied, still smiling and taking it in good grace. “Let’s just say that I hope to have the answer to an important question soon enough.” I deflected, hoping not to get into too much detail. “Well, I have a list of things that I want you and Spike to go for. You don't have to go now though.” “No, I will, fresh air might do me good.” I was touched by how dedicated to his work he was. “So, what do you want us to get?” Happy that I’d be able to get this done sooner rather than later, I gave him the shopping list. After they went through it and I gave him the appropriate finances, I waited until he and Spike were far off. This would leave me alone in the library to commence the second item on my personal to-do list, one that I had just added now: Figure out feelings for Dusk. Whether I was with him or just by myself, I was always wrestling with my emotions for him. I enjoyed his company, but only as a friend, I told myself constantly. I loved the sound of his voice, but only because he always had something intelligent to say. I didn't like it when he had to go, but only because we were such good friends. I do not have romantic feelings for him. I told myself. I do not have romantic feelings for him. Yet…over the past few weeks, I’d been finding it harder and harder to believe my own words. Each time, the reasons I gave myself for why I couldn’t possibly be having romantic feelings for him seemed more and more desperate, to the point when I felt like screaming in frustration from how completely irrational I was being. Why couldn't I just see that he was just my friend, even though we did have a kind of special connection that we always just seemed to think exactly the same things that we just fitted so well together…? I shook my head and wrapped my head hard with my hoof. “No, stop it! Don’t get caught up in that again!” Once I was convinced I could think clearly again, I tried to hold those previous feelings in contempt as I thought over my plan. Today, I was going to prove that once and for all. I didn't know why I hadn't just done this before, when I’d been battling with my feelings about him. I was going to look at some books that would tell me, for sure, that I didn't have romantic feelings for my friend and that was that. Having friends was one thing, but indulging myself in the outlandish dreams of romance? That was simply unthinkable. “Right then.” I said to myself, levitating Pony Psychology down from its shelf in the science section. “Let’s settle this once and for all.” I opened the book and turned to the page that I was looking for, confident that this emotional debate would soon be put to rest. Instead, I found more proof that the only feelings I could be having for him were those of love. Shutting the book, I set it aside and pulled down Deciphering the Mind instead. That one was probably just a fluke. Perhaps this writer would have a different view on the emotions that I was feeling. I skimmed through it, found the appropriate section, and read through it… No, this one said the same thing. No matter. I thought, starting to panic now. Maybe Feelings, Emotions, and You would have the solution. The pile of discarded books grew steadily higher and my mane grew increasingly disheveled as I desperately tried to find something, anything that would prove my case against romance for my second assistant and best friend. Perhaps this one? No, nothing… This one? No, that was useless… This one was sure to have… no, there was nothing. “There’s nothing!” I screamed eventually, flinging the last book aside. “There’s nothing at all! Nothing…” This last statement came out in a groan as I bowed my head and crossed to a mirror. My mane was now in more of a mess than when I had woken up that morning, my eye muscles were twitching from the stress of my futile venture, and I looked as if I would faint any second from how pale my face was. I smoothed myself down as best I could, looked firmly at my reflection, and tried one last thing. “I do not have romantic feelings for Dusk.” Even before I had finished speaking, I knew those words sounded hollow. Clearing my throat she tried again. “I do not have romantic feelings for Dusk.” That sounded even worse. One more time. “I do not… do not…” I couldn’t even finish that time. It looked like I was just going to have to accept defeat and succumb to the facts, the facts that I’d been trying to run away from and hide all of this time, even if it seemed so obvious. My feelings for the pony who was just as well-read as I was, but so much more engaging in imagination in the unbelievable, even when I myself simply refused to consider it… Wait, maybe that was it! Maybe the solution to my problem would be found from the pony who my dilemma centered around. If I found out how Dusk dealt with believing the impossible, then I would be able to find some way to apply that to my own predicament. It was perfect! Dusk returned with Spike just as I put away the last of the books and smoothed down my mane, removing any trace of my desperate search from before. They’d taken just as long as I’d hoped. He seemed to be in a better state than when he left as his smile was less forced and his eyes were returning to normal. He still was suffering from twinges by the look of it. When he asked me if it would be okay if he went down to Sweet Apple Acres, I not only told him that—yes, of course—it would be, but that I would go with him. That would give me time to ask him what his view was on his own beliefs. So, leaving Spike in charge of the library, the two of us headed in the direction of the farm. “So, why the sudden visit?” I asked him, when we shut the door. “We bumped into Dog while in town and he told me that they’d just finished baking an apple pie down at the farm, so he invited me to come over for a slice." He licked his lips in anticipation. “I do so enjoy that pie.” “I can tell.” I walked with him in silence for a bit, then asked what was on my mind. “How do you do it, Dusk?” “Do what?” “How do you…believe things without little or any proof? You know like blind faith?” I cocked my head at him. “I’ve noticed that about you. You believed in Pinkie Sense before I did, you walked out on a stage and performed despite what you thought of yourself, and you ran into the Everfree Forest to save us, even though you had no idea where we were or how to find us.” “You had to bring that up.” he mumbled, blushing though he still smiled. “Yes, I did. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, I just want to know…why?” “Well, I think we can rule out that last one, I was just in over my head that time and I still marvel that we escaped in the first place.” he started. “But the rest… well… it’s kind of hard to explain.” “Try me.” I prompted. “We’re both intellects, aren’t we?” “Okay then…” He thought for a moment. “Well, you know my color talent?” He demonstrated by making a mini version of myself canter by. “I do, yes.” I laughed, marveling at it until it faded away. "Go on.” “You see—until recently—for the longest time, I could find no explanation for it, no reason how or why I had such a unique power. I delved into as many books as I could find, even the dullest science journals on magic, just to try and find something. In the end, I realized that I would never find the answer and…that didn’t bother me. I realized that I couldn’t explain it, but that didn’t make it any less real, any less believable or good. I just had it and that was that. That was when I came to another revelation: there are lots of things that we can’t explain in this world. Lots of things that, even with science, we still find it hard to find explanations for. But, just because we can’t explain them, doesn’t mean we can't believe them, like with Pinkie Sense. While I do read much about science, I don’t always resort to it because it’s too grounded and inflexible. I respect it, but sometimes you can’t rely on it. That’s why I also read into novels that are fantastic rather than realistic because they’re so much more fun and exciting and make my mind imagine the impossible, like when you read Daring Do. You know what I mean, right?” I was silent at this. I hadn’t really expected something like that. I knew Dusk was intelligent, but that was rather…profound and it made sense. I still had my own beliefs, but now I understood better why he did believe in the supposedly impossible or rather the things I thought were impossible. Like me having romantic feelings for him… Suddenly, that didn’t sound so bad now. “Twi? Twi, you okay?” His expression of uncertainty had returned. “I’m sorry if I haven’t explained it well, but…that’s just how I feel. That’s not bad, is it?” “No.” I said softly. “No, not at all. In fact, I think it's quite remarkable.” “Really? You…you think so?” I had to suppress a giggle at how nervous he now looked, like my judgment decided everything. “I really do. You've always had more belief, perhaps understanding, in the extraordinary than I have. I have facts and figures, so do you, but you have so much more imagination. It’s one of the things I like about you.” I added, smiling warmly at him. “It doesn’t make you any less clever, it just makes you more…open.” “Really? Hm… I never really thought about it like that.” he remarked, returning my smile. “Thanks, Twi. Additionally, your belief in finding the facts is one of the things I like about you.” “That’s nice to know, thank you.” I looked up the road. “Oh, look, we’re here!” “Ah! I can smell the pie already.” he sighed at the sight of the vast barn. “You get the first slice though, I insist.” “How kind of you, good sir.” I replied smartly, blushing at his politeness. I caught sight of the sky blue pony along with our peach-colored friend approaching us. “Hey there, Dog!” “Dusk and Twilight, nice to see ya both.” he greeted happily. “Ya didn’t tell me y’all were bringin’ company, Dusk.” “You two don’t mind, do you?” he asked, unsurely. “Course not. The more the merrier.” Applejack assured him. “Y’all and Dog head on in. I want to talk with Twilight for a bit.” Dusk didn’t object, though he did flash a look of concern to me. I gave him a smile to tell him that I was fine, he nodded and headed inside with Dog. Applejack promptly turned to look at me. “Ya seem like you’re in a good mood, Twi.” she noted. “Why shouldn’t I be?” I echoed, feeling a sense of déjà vu. “What did you want to ask me, Applejack?” “Just if anythin’s happened concernin’ a certain red-tailed friend of ours.” She gestured her head to the barn. “Anythin’ ya’d like to tell me?” I considered telling her the conclusion that I had, at least partially, accepted, but decided I didn’t want anypony to know yet until I’d figured it out completely. “No, I don’t think so.” “Ya sure?” I only nodded. “Well, if ya say so. Come on, before Dusk eats all the pie.” “I don’t think he will, but let’s go.” I agreed, surprised at how eager I was to rejoin Dusk. There were still some things that I’d like to figure out for myself before I made any kind of major decisions, but I found myself enjoying imagining the possibilities. Maybe having romantic feelings for a pony like Dusk wouldn’t be so bad… it certainly wasn’t impossible.