We never married. Was that a bad sign? It didn’t feel like a bad sign, when we talked about it. Rarity and Applejack were engaged, and Sunset brought it up to me, and... I suppose, for whatever reason, it just didn’t seem important.
It makes things easier, at least. Legally speaking. No divorce papers or anything like that to sort out, no grand settlements to be made in court. Sunset just takes her things and leaves, and that’s the end of it. Well, we bought the house together. Mortgaged it together. Whatever. I called her up to ask about it, a week after she left. I was feeling lonely, and she wasn’t answering me, so I left a message that ‘hey, we need to talk about the house.’ She didn’t call back, but she keeps paying it anyway. I’m not sure why. Probably it’s easier to just pay bills she doesn’t need to pay than talk to me. I don’t blame her.
Sunset can do that, though. She has the money, she has the friends. She could always leave – she had the power to up and vanish, live for six months or a year hopping from couch to couch before she found a new place to settle down again – I just didn’t think she would. That’s what she’s doing now, I’m pretty sure. Staying at Twilight’s or Fluttershy’s or Rarity and Applejack’s (I think about them, and I feel old, and bitter, and jealous), calling up ‘Sorry, can I sleep at your place for a week or three?’ I wonder what they’d say if I did that. I wonder what my other friends would say. This house is now so very lonely, I can’t deny that I’ve been tempted. But I’m not the kind of person that gets to do that, I don’t think. I’m Wallflower, not Sunset Shimmer, and that means stay home and cry alone, put on your bravest face, and when you go outside, try not to let the world see how much it hurt you.
It probably isn’t any easier, actually. At least with a divorce I’d get to see her. See her in court, sure, but it would be something. Some kind of contact. By law, she’d have to respond, she couldn’t just take her things and leave, one day, and not call me all this time. It would be big, and messy, full of legal battles, everything as huge and overwhelming as it feels. I’d have lawyers on my side, to say ‘Wallflower Blush did nothing wrong, Sunset Shimmer’s the one who left.’ We’d have to set out what was mine, exactly, what was hers – and when it all was done I could sit back with whatever I was left with and know that this is mine. That these things, right here, belonged to me, that they were my life, and mine alone.
She’d hire better lawyers, naturally. I’d lose most of everything. But in the end, the very end, it would be final. ‘This is the last time I’ll ever see you,’ might be said, and the world would recognise us as being apart. It would be bad, I’m sure, but at least there would be some closure. Right now the wound is cut wide open, and every time I try to close it, I turn a corner and see some remnant of her lying in the corner. Sunset’s books upon the shelf. Sunset’s pillows on the bed. The whole thing feels...half-finished.
I wish that I could hate her.
Sunset
20:35
Hey.
20:35
I’ve thought of a favourite plant.
20:35
Is it a sunflower?
20:36
What?
20:36
My favourite plant’s a sunflower
20:37
Of course it is.
20:37
It’s not a sunflower.
20:38
Awww
20:39
Is it a Wallflower?
20:39
;p
20:39
It is not.
20:40
If I’m allowed to talk :)
20:40
It’s technically a weed.
20:41
Here:
Red brick wall. Rubble collects around the base. Ruin of a house. Blue sky. Thick green leaves climb up the stone. Vital in the sun.
20:42
Is that ivy?
20:42
It’s ivy, yes.
20:43
I am intrigued
20:44
My interest has been peaked
20:44
*piqued.
20:45
Someone’s been spending too much time with Twilight
20:48
I like ivy because it’s persistent. You try to pull it off, and it just grows back again next week. And people say it’s a parasite, but it’s not, it just uses other things to climb.
20:50
It’s misunderstood. Just trying to reach the sun and grow strong.
20:52
Very nice
20:53
You have convinced me
20:53
I have been convinced
20:54
Ivy’s pretty cool
20:55
It is!!
20:56
Why do you like sunflowers?
20:57
Cause they’re pretty
20:58
And they have “sun” in the name?
20:59
That too
21:01
There were a lot of them around back where I grew up as well
21:02
Used to see them nodding along on the way to school when I was a filly
21:04
I keep forgetting you used to be a pony.
21:04
Does that weird you out?
21:06
I’m not sure if I quite believe it yet
21:06
to be really honest.
21:07
Lol
21:08
Can’t say I blame you, I wouldn’t believe me either.
21:10
It’s not that I *don’t* believe you, it’s more like... It’s just hard to imagine this whole other world out there, you know?
21:13
Where you have four hooves and a tail? ;)
21:14
Yes. I can’t imagine myself like that! I *really* can’t imagine *you* like that!
21:15
I’ll have you know I made a very pretty pony
21:16
*That* I have no trouble believing.
21:19
I’ll have to take you someday
21:20
Where? To... Equestrian?
21:21
Equestria, yeah
21:23
For the record, I meant to type Equestrian. Blame autocorrect.
21:23
Dammit!
21:24
XD
21:25
I’ll take you too Equestrian too, it’s okay
21:27
-_-
21:28
Well, only if you want.
21:29
Wait, does that mean there’s another you running around in this world somewhere?
21:31
Probably
21:32
I’ve tried to go looking a couple times, but nothing so far
21:32
She must be somewhere though
21:33
More importantly, it means there’s a pony version of *you* running around, too!
21:34
Oh no.
21:35
Okay, we’re doing this
21:36
You
21:36
Me
21:36
Equestria
21:37
We’re going looking for pony Wallflower
21:38
I bet she’s *adorable*
21:40
I have my doubts, but I suppose it sounds like fun.
21:41
Don’t doubt it! Fun is guaranteed
21:42
Unless your doubts were about the other thing
21:42
In which case, *extra* guaranteed
21:52
You free tomorrow?
21:55
I have a couple of hours after school.
21:56
Awesome. Equestrian trip?
21:57
Umm
21:57
Tomorrow?
21:58
If you’re free
22:00
Can I think about it?
22:01
Sure! Just let me know
22:05
Will do.
22:07
Cool. See ya at school either way
22:08
See you!
23:56
Hey
23:58
Late is the hour in which this conjurer chooses to appear
23:59
What?
23:59
Sorry?
00:00
Don’t worry about it
00:00
Wassup?
00:01
Ok.
00:02
I think I’m down for going to Equestria.
00:02
If you were being serious.
00:03
Not Equestrian? Awww
00:04
But if you’re down for it, that’s cool!
00:04
Don’t feel like you have to though
00:05
No, I want to.
00:06
In that case
00:06
Hell yeah!
00:07
:)
00:07
Meet you in the garden after school?
00:08
Sounds good.
00:08
Awesome! This gonna be good
00:09
But I should get some sleep now
00:09
History first period
00:10
My sympathies.
00:10
Niiight
00:11
Goodnight!
00:35
Wait
00:36
Is that the reason there’s so much ivy round the back of the school
00:36
?
00:40
I thought you were supposed to be asleep
00:41
But yes, it is.
00:42
It might have maybe possibly grown from some seeds I planted in the garden.
00:43
Kind of blew up from there.
00:43
Hot damn
00:44
That’s like
00:44
A *lot* of ivy
00:45
Like they got people in last summer to try get rid of it, didn’t they?
00:46
They may have.
00:47
The contractors may have also immediately forgotten why they came.
00:48
*Wallflower Blush*
00:48
Yes?
00:48
Respect.
00:49
I didn’t mean for it to get so out of hand!
00:50
You’d better hope Principal Luna never finds out about it
00:50
She will actually explode
00:51
Whoops.
00:52
Amazing
00:53
Well, time to try again to get to sleep I think
00:54
Night Wally
00:54
(Can I call you Wally?)
00:56
Sure.
00:57
Night Sunny!
00:58
You can to do better than that ;)
00:59
Night