At the ponyville hospital, a grown stallion sat alone in the waiting room, watching the clock with anxiousness, and from time to time, look at the empty seats.
He knew why the place was empty, Pinkie Pie was throwing a big party to celebrate the first day of spring, and apparently everypony is there, because he was waiting for an hour.
Suddenly the door opened, and a nurse pony wearing a jacket entered, "about time." he thought.
"Sorry I took so long sir." She said as she took off her jacket, "I was dealing with some serious business at home, but your call seemed urgent, now what seems to be the problem?"
"I've got stomach pains nurse." He said, motioning to his chest, "I get a terrible feeling down here, everytime I laugh."
"That sounds pretty serious, I better take a look at you." She led the stallion to one of the infirmary rooms, "My names Nurse Redheart by the way, what's yours?"
"Ceely, Ernie Ceely." He answered, "I moved here from Vanhoover two weeks ago, I was kind of a practical joker down there."
"I see." Redheart said, "say, are you by any chance related to Pinkie."
"If I was, then my last name would be Pie."
"Just checking." Said Redheart, "just out of curiosity, what type of jokes do you usually do."
"Well I usually do some prank calls." Ernie started off, "For example, I would usually call a random house, and I'd say something along the lines of 'excuse me, I'm with the electric company, we're doing a routine inspection, is the streetlight outside your house lit.'" A grin started to form on his face, "they go check and then say, 'yeah it's lit', and I just say, 'well make you put it out before you go to bed okay, bye'".
He then started to chuckle at the memory, but it stopped and the grin faded as he felt the pain return. "Are you alright?" Redheart asked.
"Yeah I'm fine, but now you know how I feel these pains once in a while." Ernie said, and then continued his story.
"That wasn't the only prank call I did, I would also call a bar that was in a town called Springfield, I remember it like it was yesterday..."
"Hello, Moe's tavern. "
"Yes, is there a Hugh Janus here, I have an important message for him."
"Hold on I'll check... Hugh Janus, phone call for Hugh Janus... come guys, do I have a Hugh Janus.
"You sure do."
*Laughter*
"Wait a minute... It's you again isn't it Celly, I swear one of days I'm gonna find you and shove an apple so far up your flank cider will come out of mouth when you talk."
"The guy was a jerk but I love him, and besides there's no way he'd track me down here." Ernie laughed in triumph, knowing he was safe from Moe's laugh, which proved to be a mistake, as he put his hooves over his chest in pain.
"Is that why you moved to ponyville?" Nurse Redheart asked.
"Oh no, it was the prank call I made the day before I left that made me move here." Ernie admitted, "I was hoping to get a gas station, a quaint little house, or a small hotel, but I think I got Liam Neeson's house instead, because before I got a word in edgewise, the guy on the other end said something like this..."
https://m."I thought it was a joke too, but I'm still not sure it was actually Liam Neeson, but I still moved just in case it was."
All of this left Nurse Redheart confused, "What does this have to do with your stomach pains."
"I'm getting there." Ernie said, "After I moved here, I decided to pull what I consider to be the best joke I ever done, it was a simple matter of buying some hunks of meat and some young pony's clothes, but I decided to wait until next week so I can get acquainted with some of the residents here."
Ernie was careful not to laugh, but instead smiled at the memory of the joke... he never noticed the look on Redheart's face, which vanished when she looked at Ernie, "what exactly did you do as your joke?"
"Well, what I did is that I put the meat in the clothes, and when the time was right, put them on the tracks at the train station." Ernie said, as he thought back to that day, "aside from some ponies and other creatures getting on and off the train, there were some kids playing near the tracks." Redheart's look from before returned, "When the train went over the dummy I made, I made a loud, childlike scream, you should have seen the looks on faces when they saw the mess."
This time, Ernie laughed, and once again the pain returned.
"You know what, I think I need to do some more examinations to see what the problem is." Redheart said, "just wait out here for a moment, I'll let you know when you can come in." She took out some pills from a container, "In the meantime, take four of these, it'll ease the pain."
Ernie walked out into the hall and took the pills, he heard the sound of equipment moving around in the room, the seconds turned into minutes, and finally, Redheart told him, "Alright Ernie, you can come in now."
"Uh nurse, I don't think those pills are working." Ernie said "In fact, it feels as painful as ever."
"Don't worry, these exams should be able to help find what the problem is."
Ernie sat down on the bed in the medical room, while redheart opened a window which was positioned to face a nearby cemetery, but Redheart seemed to look at a mausoleum.
"You know, there was a family in this town Ernie, a father and two boys, one was eight, while the other one was three."
"Yeah kids were easy targets for me, you should've seen their faces the moment they saw that mess."
"As a matter of fact, this concerns your little prank." She said, as her thoughts went back to that fateful day.
"See you guys, I'm off to work, Harold there's some pie in the fridge if you want it, Jeffrey look after Steven while I'm out."
"I probably should've mentioned there was a wife too, anyway, on the day you pulled that joke of yours, Jeffrey was playing near the train station with his friends, until they heard a scream, when they saw bloody remains they ran screaming into the town, but Jeffrey thought the mess was his brother."
Jeffrey was running with a horrified look on his face, shouting "DAD, DAD!" all the while... unaware of a runaway cart heading in his direction.
"LOOK OUT!!!"
"Harold heard some screams and went outside to investigate, forgetting to turn off the water in the bathtub."
Harold ran outside to see what happened... though he wished he didn't.
"Oh my Celestia, JEFFREY!"
Horrified beyond belief, Harold suddenly remembered Steven, and ran back into the house, when he got to the bathroom, he gasped in horror, and felt a searing pain rushing through him.
Ernie was left confused by the story, but more importantly, how could Redheart know everything about the family, unless...
The realization hit him like a ton of bricks, "YOU!!!"
"Yes Ernie." Redheart said with anger growing in her voice, "That was MY FAMILY'S STORY, my son died when he got hit by that cart, the baby drowned, and my husband dropped dead of a heart attack, MY FAMILY IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU!"
Before Ernie could react, Redheart forced him onto the bed and tied his hooves to the ends of said bed, "And by the way, there's a reason why your stomach pains gotten worse, it's because the pills had fish hooks, barbed fish hooks."
Ernie struggled to free himself, but it was no use since the ropes were the 'extra thick' type, so there was nothing he could do when Redheart forced what seemed to be a mask over his nose of mouth, connected to a canister... of laughing gas.
Before Ernie knew it, he felt the laughing gas taking effect, and began to laugh and writhe in pain, while Nurse Redheart stood and watched the scene unfold.
"Die laughing Ernie, DIE LAUGHING. "