//------------------------------// // Let the game begin...Oh wait they already have // Story: From Order to Chaos // by Neoandermcd //------------------------------// “…Sopranos and it just cuts off in mid sentence.” Derange yelled as he caught up with the group. We just ignored his comment and continued our way towards Wethoof. The town was pretty big so I was impressed with the giant wall that encompassed it. The area around Wethoof was cleared of trees and half of the area had deep scars in the earth from a huge battle…or those giant corpse of Hydras that are being used to fertilize the land, damn ponies don’t let anything go to waste. As we reached the gate, I noticed that the ponies working the field didn’t even give us a look over and just simply ignored us. ‘Damn and I was missing all the attention I was getting too.’ I thought sarcastically. “HALT!” yelled an Earth pony as he blocked our way in. ‘Criminal scum, pay the court a fine or serve your sentence, your stolen goods are now forfeit.’ Derange thought to me and we both started to snicker much to confusion of everyone there. “What business do you have here?” The guard asked while looking us over. I was about to respond only for my head to make a one eighty as my instincts told me to go a different direction. “Apparently none.” I said and tried to get a better feel of which way to head next, which consisted of me licking my finger and holding it up in the air to feel for the Chaos currents…and yes I just compared Chaos to wind deal with it. “Actually Drake, we are running low on supplies and it would be in our best interest to stock up.” Silver said. “Yeah, plus I want to sleep on an actual bed and not outside for a change.” Minutte chimed in. “Oh, does little Colgy want to sleep on a bed.” Derange spoke as if he was talking to a baby. “Little Colgy is going to kick, Dewange little butt if he talks like that again.” Minutte responded back. “Ohhh, I didn’t know you were into Femdom.” Derange said and brought out a ball gag. “Be gentle I bruise easily.” He finished and put it in his mouth. Minuette was blushing profusely and tried to stammer out a response, but came up with nothing. Derpy was much the same, but instead was covering Dinky’s ear much to the fillys charge of wanting to listen, while I was laughing my ass off. Hey, I might not like him, but he still has a good sense of humor every so often. While Silver and the other guard were idling chatting away about guard stuff. Silver and the guard quickly gave one another a quick salute and he walked back towards his post. “You guys about done?” She asked. “Hmphphrhg.” Derange said with the ball gag still in his mouth. “…I’ll take that as a yes.” She said and continued. “I filled them in while you guys were messing around and they offered to give us some supplies and a place to stay for the evening.” “*sigh* So there’s no way to convince you girls to just sleep in the mildly creepy and dangerous forest?” I asked sarcastically since I already knew the answer. “Fine. You girls have fun while Derange and I go check something out.” I said and motioned for Derange to follow. “Not going to happen.” Silver and Derange said at the same time. They both looked at one another in surprise. “I’m not allowed to let you out of my sight.” “And I don’t want to go.” “Ok, fine whatever, Derange stay here and don’t cause any problems. Minuette, Derpy, and Dinky keep an eye on him. Let’s go Silver” I said and took to the skies Silver right behind me. ~Derange PoV~ ‘Annnnnnndddd there gone, finally.’ I thought as I watched those two spoilsports take off. ‘Now then, I just need to ditch these losers and I’m all set.’ I thought while rubbing my hands together mischiefly. “Ahem.” Coughed Minuette as she brought me out of my thoughts. “Derpy and I are going to go get those supplies and spend some time catching up while you keep an eye on Dinky.” She said with a I’m in charge attitude. “Yeah, no. I’m going to go have some fun.” I deadpanned and prepped myself to fly off only to be caught in a magic glow. “You.Owe.Me.” She said as she glared at me. “Correction, Drake owes you, not me. I never agreed to that part.” I replied back. “Derange.” Minuette growled. “*sigh* Fine~, I’ll watch her.” I said grudgingly. ‘This is total bullshit, but who’s to say I have to wac…’ “Derange~” Derpy sang out trying to get my attention. When I turned to look at her, I felt my body tense up and all thought seem to just stop, my mind focusing on the scary yellow mane pegasus in front of me. “If anything were to happen to my little muffin or if she were to learn something inappropriate, I just don’t know what I’d do to set pony. Understand?” She threatened nicely which just added to the ‘holy shit’ o-meter. “Yes, ma’am.” I said barely audible…Fluttershy would be proud. “Good.” She said, instantly switching from scary mom to nice mom “Now Dinky, don’t get into any trouble, okay muffin.” She said nicely. “Yes mommy, I’ll make sure we don’t get into any trouble.” Dinky responded back. “Ok, then. Have fun you two.” Derpy said as she headed towards the village. “Yeah, have fun.” Minuette snickered as she walked by me. Dinky and I kind of stood there for a couple of minutes in awkward silence. “So…want to take a look at the town?” I asked. “Ok.” she said and started to head towards the village. “*sigh* This is going to be a long day.” ~Drake PoV~ We’ve been flying for about a couple of minutes now, every so often I would stop mid flight, check to make sure we were going the right way, and then continue our journey in relative silence. About an hour later or so I could see/feel where the chaotic magic was coming from. It was a tall pyramid structure like those of ancient Egypt back home. With a silent gesture of my hand, I motioned towards the structure. Silver responded with a simple nod and we both landed on the top because in all honesty, who in their right mind would walk up or down the stairs…don’t look at me like that, it was a shit load of stairs and I didn’t want to walk up to the top. As we landed my Pip-Boy ranged out naming the pyramid ‘The Temple of Chaos’, the only thing on the flat top was a stone container. As we approached the container I could feel traces of leftover Chaos magic, inside the container was a room, but it was too dark to see anything else down there. “Drake.” Silver called out and pointed towards something. As I moved over there I could see what she was looking at, inscribed on the lid of the coffin/container was The Sun burns bright The Moon shines at night The Oceans swirl around While the Earth remains the ground If you want in, just press down. Here lies a poor dog who took a deal Who dared to chose to spin the wheel Did he win? Did he lose? It's up to the mangy mutt to choose Oh, and thanks for the coffee. Love, Discord “Any ideas about what it means?” Silver asked as she looked it over. “I have a theory, but nothing conclusive.” I said completely avoiding the question and returning to looking down the container trying to see what the bottom looked like. You know that saying ‘if you stare into the abyss long enough it’ll stare back’ I was getting that deep chill to the bones kind of feel. “Are we going down there?” she asked with a stoic look. “No, no we don’t need to.” I said as I backed away from the opening and proceeded to sit down a few feet away from the container, Silver laying down a foot away from me. As I started to focus on the chaos magic around me, trying to find the source. “Might want to get comfy since I don’t know how long this will take.” I told her, but before I could hear her response everything went white. ~Derange PoV~ “*exhales deeply* Ahhh, this is so peaceful, relaxing, and most importantly boring as buck.” I deadpanned. We were in a meadow like area in the village. Flowers of all color and shape were spaced about and Dinky was going around drawing pictures and coloring them to show Ditzy later…and I was completely bored out of my mind. This area reeked of *gags* Order and I would have fixed that in a heartbeat if it wasn’t for the Draconequus with a stick up his ass and a blond haired Pegasus who scared the buck out of me, but such is life. A cruel heartless bitch who’ll do anything just to fuck with your life. Wait, what’s that? You want to know about what happen in the town, well…absolutely fucking nothing that’s what happened. This place was boring as hell, well was being the keyword and I may or may not have played a few pranks here or there. Which included a storm cloud following some poor sap as it rained gumdrops--by the way the kids loved that bit--, made some toy do the Macarena-- which again the kids loved--, put a few stink bombs here or there-- most of the town didn’t find that funny…I wonder why--, and then was promptly chased out of town for finding the girls bathing quarters…and yes I took some pictures, sketches, and a few tapes before I was caught and they’ll be on sale for a certain price, the bundle coming up to seventy bits. “You could always draw some flower like you did with those rocks that were near the bathing area Mr. Derange.” Dinky said innocently. ’Must…resist urge…to hug.’ I thought as I slowly gathered my thoughts to be coherent, which is a major accomplishment in my opinion. “Thanks, but no thanks kid, I think I got all my drawing out for the day.” I said nervously which quickly changed to annoyed. “Also just Derange, kid, I’m not that old yet”. “It’s not kid then.” She replied back. “Heh, Touché.” I said to her with a nod of approval. ‘Kid learns fast’. “Hey, Derange?” She asked a bit hesitantly. “Yeah?” “Why does everypony dislike you?” She asked with a curious, yet innocent look. “I wouldn’t say dislike. It’s more like, they hate my guts and want to make a little Derange puppet out of me for a show, so they could make me look like dummy.” I replied back evenly. “But why?” she asked confused. “Lots of reasons kid.” I half-assed answered as I motioned for her to let it go. She responded back with a glare which was really more of a cute little pout. “There’s just too many to list kid. Besides you're still too young to understand this kind of junk.” ‘But more importantly, I don’t want to die.’ I thought and shivered at the thoughts of what Derpy would do to me. “I’m not a little foal. I’m a big pony.” She said with a pout, crossed her hooves and turned her back towards me. ‘Must…resist…the D’awwwwssssss’ I thought. And there we were back to where we began or in other words, we went in a complete circle…sort of. Me laying down completely bored and Dinky sitting there ignoring me. “Fine, if you’re just going to sit there and do nothing, I’m going to go somewhere else.” I said to her and proceeded to dust myself off. “No you won’t.” She said without looking at me. “Oh really?” I said to her and proceed to leave. “Yes, because if you do I’ll tell my mommy that you left me all alone the entire day.” She said. ‘Why you no good little shit….I’m so proud of you.’ “Heh, seems like I’m between a rock and a hard place.” I said to her casually and return back to my laying spot. “Fine, fine, since I can’t go anywhere/do anything and since I’m assuming you're ignoring me, I guess I’ll rant a bit about that question that was asked earlier.” This caught her interest as she turned to face me while I closed my eyes thinking of the right words. “There are many words to describe a Draconequus: improbable, loony, crazy, insane, insane in the min brain, insane-- Yes I know I used the same words and yes, I know I repeated a word let me finish. Geez, kids now a day’s no longer patient enough to let their elders speak. Oy Vey what has this world come too…What? Oh right, so yeah back to my little rant.-- Anywho the best way to describe us or in a nutshell would be the unknown. For you see little one, the unknown scares people, it drives some to insanity or others to hide from it, but nonetheless the unknown is just as it sounds unknown and for creatures who are naturally curious. Who naturally want to solve question, it’s very tempting to dive head first into it to gain knowledge and answers yet dangerous because of what they might find out isn’t what they weren’t expecting.” “And because of that it’s why most folks hate us, because Draoncaquai are to…random, spontaneous, illogical and etcetera creatures. We do things that break down the metaphorical walls of the minds of other creatures to the point of insanity, so they instinctively respond back with disgust or hate or others words that involve hate. Don’t look at me like that, what do I look like a Sweetie Bell? And no, I’m not going to explain what that statement means.” I said finishing up my little rant, a few minutes passed as her mind tried to process the information I told her. ‘Uh, oh, did I break her?’ I thought as I opened one eye to take a glance at her. She had her eyes close in deep thought like really really deep thought, what don’t judge me what do I look like a Sweetie….wait. Didn’t I already make this joke?, oh well. ‘Better fix her before Derpy see her…where did I put that wrench at.’ I thought as I started to search through my feathers. “Well that seems silly.” She finally said as she opened her eyes and looked at me. “Uh, what does?” I asked her while I put away the wrench that was going to be used to ‘fix’ her with. “Why should we fear the unknown if we know what the unknown is.” She said waiting for me to responded, but she only got a ‘What in the bloody hell are you talking about’ look from me which she responded with a roll of her eyes and continued talking to me like I was a child…oh the irony. “It’s simple, all we have to do is get to know the unknown, like you. At first I thought you were pretty scary, but after being around you for so long I learned that you’re not scary, but fun to be around. It’s like mommy always say, ‘you can never judge a muffin by its description’. So with that all we have to do is let others know that you’re not scary and that there’s no reason to be mean to you or afraid of the unknown.” She said with a smile. We sat there for five minutes, me looking at her dumbfounded while she sat there with a nervous smile; which was totally, maybe, more than possibly my fault. “Pffft…BWHAHAHAHAHAHA” I laughed no longer able to hold back my laughing fit and fell back to the ground clutching my side as I laughed. ‘Ah the mind of a child such a wonderful thing.’ I thought somehow without laughing. “What so funny?” She said annoyed. “Tel…tell you what.” I said to her as I got my laughing fit under controlled. “Let’s make a deal ki…I mean Dinky”.” “What kind of bet? Also I don’t think mommy would approve.” She said hesitantly and confused. “Don’t worry this is a friendly wager, so only I will hold up the end of the deal.” I explain to her and continue, “If in a few years you don’t feel the same way as you do now about the subject, I plainly get to say I told ya so, but if you win well Je vais vous prendre pour un bon dîner de fruits de mer, puis nous aurons le temps smexy.(I'll take you out to a nice seafood dinner and then we'll have smexy time.) Sounds good?” I said.  ‘Ah the language of love, I knew I could make a debauchery of it.’ I thought. “What’s that suppose to mean?” She asked me. I just ruffled her mane, much to her annoyance. “When you’re older, now come here you.” I said and gave her a quick hug which was returned. Ha, I got a hug from a cute little pony suck it everyone…I mean I got a manly hug from a cute litt…You’re not buying this are you? “Welp that’s enough of that.” I said and broke away from the hug. “Now it’s getting a bit late we should probably…WHAT THE HAY ARE YOU LOOKING AT!” I yelled at the creature who has been watching us for the past ten minutes. “Uh Derange, who are you yelling at?” She asked looking all over the field for the creature. “I’m yelling at that jack off right there.” I pointed towards the creature and its black evil little beady eyes. “…But that’s a-” She didn’t get to finish her sentence as I walked over towards the jackass. “You want start something pal, huh? Do ya?” I yelled in a Boston accent. “But Derange-” “No I’m going to teach this little F…I mean, jerk who’s boss.” I said and cracked my knuckles. “Let’s dance.” ~Drake PoV~ An empty void much like the one I was in during my mind trip and no I’m not referring to that time I was in college and…oh, wait. I never told you guys that story…moving on. It was practically the same the only key difference was that the void like area I was in was a light grey void of nothingness, is what I’d like to say but it appears to be moving towards my destination. I guess you could say my final…wait. Technically it’s not so I can’t make that joke…yet. Mark my words, I’ll make that joke dammit! …by the gods I’m losing it. Anyways getting over my little freak out there I noticed I that I was in front of Wethoof once more the only difference being that it was night time, everything was in black and white and that it was silent as well. ‘Now what am I waiting for?’ I thought to myself as I flew up into the midnight sky to get a better view. I didn’t have to wait long as a dark silhouette came out from the forest and dashed right towards Wethoof itself. ‘Curious.’ I thought as I made my way towards the figure, it was a diamond dog with a sweater on carrying a sack on its back. His hands--yes I found that out, don’t ask how or why--were glowing with magic as he used his hands to write out in Equestrian probably talking to someone that I can’t see. ‘Seems upset about something.’ I thought as I noticed a scowl on his face, only for him to throw a chunk of dirt up towards the watchtower and to then break down the front door of the village ‘…holly shit dude.’ I thought as the memory or vision faded out. My vision returned and I was no longer in Wethoof, but now in a wasteland, awfully dull really nothing in sight except a dead bush, dead tree, a griffon, and a dragon….wait what? Yes, a dragon and from what I know--now anyways--that it was huge and it was a black dragon the strongest kind out there and that griffon was going to fight it bare handed…that screamed ‘genius’ right there. Only for him to then fly right towards the dragon grab one of its scale, use it as a shield to protect himself from the flames--yes, I found that out too, quit asking--, flew right down the dragon's throat, after a minute of the dragon thrashing about it died, he came out of the dragon's mouth, perched himself on top of the corpse, and let out a victory cry. ‘What.The.Fuck?’ I thought as I watched the scene before me and the world faded once more. Only for me to be in the exact same place I was originally at the only difference being that I was a distance away in the air. ‘Wait what?’. I then noticed to the left of me a black wingless dragon standing on top of a tree ‘…Jackie Chan or Bruce Lee much?’ I thought till I noticed the battle with the dragon being finished and the two griffons flying off. The girl dragon--I’m not going to answer so leave me alone-- jumped down and crawled over towards the big dragon her whole body shaking as tears started to form around her eyes. She seemed to be talking to the big dragon a sad look spread across her face, then she cried to the heavens releasing a huge breath of fire the second that she stopped it started to rain covering up the tears that were going down her face. The world faded once more. I came back to the world or vision…whatever it is that’s happening to me, as I was now in a city…surrounded by a group of guards. ‘Well, shit that sucks. This next person must have been really unlucky…should have bribed the guards. It always works in Skyrim.’ I thought as I noticed the two figures in the center. One was a old looking cat person like from Skyrim, but I think the proper term is Bast while the other was a younger looking Bast with a wooden arm for his right hand. They then broke away from one another and started to fight the guards and were pretty much kicking ass until a net caught them and a unicorn charged some sort of spell and fried them. The world faded once more. I came back only to be in a large cave where a giant wolf thing was at. He seemed to be talking to someone. As I turned around I came face to face with a…bugbear? Yeah let’s go with that. The most noticeable thing about him was his left arm being made of some sort of metal. He then walked up towards the beast shook its paw--making a deal perhaps--and cut off a piece of rope/string that was around the wolf’s neck. They then proceeded to leave the cave killing all the diamond dogs that got in their way while also freeing all the slaves. The world faded once more. I came back only for my scenery to be a blur of trees and bushes passing me. Speaking of which there was a bipedal wolf dog thing running towards a town…and there was a dragon there. ‘Really are ALL the Chess Pieces insane.’ I thought as we arrived into the town only for him to jump onto a roof and make his way over towards the dragon while dodging the fireballs it shot out. He then jumped onto the dragon's back, slowly made his way to the head of the dragon, jumped in front of it, dodge a bite by slashing it, grabbed a barb thing on its face, and used the momentum to place the blade through its head effectively killing it. He then stumbled out of a cart, made his way towards the dragon and grabbed his sword from the dragon's neck. ‘What.The.Actual.Flying.Fuck.Just happened?’ I thought as the world faded. I was now in an arena diamond dogs sitting in the bleachers and a huge ass Minotaur charging towards me…wait what? ‘Oh shit!’ I thought and flinched as the Minotaur ran right through me leaving me completely unharmed. ‘Oh right, astral projection memory thing a ma jig.’ I thought as I turned around and noticed that A) the minotaur was now stuck to the wall and B) there was a dancing stag on top of its head. ‘…what the fuck…I don’t even.’ I thought as the world faded. I was now free falling, and yes I was humming the lyrics while I was falling. The creature that was falling looked like hellboy in all honesty, a couple of minutes passed and at the last second we passed an airship. The hellboy look alike grabbed a piece of rope from the anchor and crash right through a cement wall. ‘Ohhhh, that’s going to hurt.’ I thought as I winced, then the world faded. I came back to see that I was in a field a giant snake man thing relaxing in the sun only for him to snap up and wave his hand to cast some sort of spell and slithered on over towards a group of dogs. He talked to the dogs for a bit the longer they talked the more scarier looking he became and then faster than a bullet he killed them all and freed the slaves. ‘Holy shit, dude.’ I thought as the world faded. I was in a lit cave tall enough for me to stand without slouching and next to me was…Spitfire? And she was yelling at some winged wolf thing, Cynogriffon I believe being the term. The wolf made some sort of reply and then ran off killing all the diamond dogs that got in his way, or was he tracking them down? I was not sure. He then seemed to pause at a door as if thinking about if he should go in or not. A moment passed and he did as he tackled a dog holding a whip and killed the dogs in the room. Then…Octavia? Started to yell at him while the wolf just had a ‘I don’t give two fucks about what you’re saying’ look, then they talked and he once more resumed his bloodshed of the dogs. The world faded just as he reached a massive door. ‘Awww, it was just getting good to. Boooo~ I want my money back.’ I said as I threw a bag of popcorn into the void of nothing. I was next to a really really huge ass fucking tree and was slowly making my way up, a timber wolf right next to me was climbing set tree. ‘I don’t know why, but I have the strangest feeling of putting fires out for some reason.’ I thought as I looked at the wooden creature. Then I noticed a shit load of spider webs the father we climbed up. “Nope. Abandoning thread…Celestia, Dammit.” I said while I faced palm and jumped, even though I was in mid air, and proceeded to free fall the world faded once more. I was now on…a spaceship…you know I’m not even surprised anymore. There standing in front of an alien was…sonic the hedgehog only in a werehog form…ok. That doesn’t seem right, let’s call him a werehog that happens to look like a sonic character and he was showing a video of the…other chess pieces…insert inception joke…followed by profit joke. Then the alien seemed to pale at the sight of all the badass amongst the chess pieces and the werehog seemed to say something witty. Then the world faded once more. There were dogs surrounding a caravan of ponies and rounding them up. A dog separated from them and brought back a cat. The dog holding the cat smelt the cat made a comment and the cat-- I assume since everyone was staring at the cat--said something. Then out of nowhere the cat turned into a freaking dragon. ‘…nope, still not surprised.’ I thought as the dog and ponies both fled from the dragon and the world faded. I was back in the void of grey the only difference now that it showed all of the chess pieces flying by at a fast pace each one doing some sort of amazing stunt. A giant armor man, a troll--must resist joke--a bipedal changeling with a sweet ass looking guitar as he played it, a female human commanding an undead army, a cow talking to the princesses, a zebra sending out some sort of shock wave towards a blob and a dragon, and many other chess pieces each doing something amazing/spectacular. The images eventually became a blur as I flew past them at ludicrous speeds, then I stopped. The images disappeared and I was alone once more…or so I thought as I was now cover by a dark silhouette. The second I turned around my eyes went to the size of pin bricks as I looked at the massive creature before me, the creature staring right back at me. The last thing I remember is the creature laughing which was covered by the sound of my screams. ~Real World~ “Snap out of it!” Silver screamed as she slapped me with her hoof in rapid succession. “Ahhh! OW! STOP! STOP I’M GOOD.” I told her as I grabbed her hoof to prevent her from slapping me anymore. “Obviously you weren’t, I was just taking a nap when suddenly you started screaming.” She retorted. “Wait, I was screaming?” I asked confused. ‘Why would I be screaming? I was just getting an idea about what the other pieces looked like and then-’ I thought trying to remember what happened after that, but I was drawing a blank. “Are you sure you’re fine?” She asked with a bit of concern. “Who are you and what have you done with Silver?” I asked joking only to receive another smack across the face. “OW! That hurts ya know.” I whined now rubbing my sore cheeks. “Get over it.” She replied back. ‘Ah, that’s the Silver I know.’ “Now what was with the screaming?” She asked. ‘Crap, that the Silver I know.’ “*Sigh* I don’t remember.” I answered truthfully. “Just getting some info on the other piece like what they look and or what they can do, but then it’s all a blank.” I said with a shrug. “Oh well, it must’ve not been that important if I forgot about it.” I said and clapped my hands. “Best be heading back to town before it gets dark.” I said and dashed off to the sky.  “You coming or what?” “Yeah...” she said and gave me a look that said ‘this isn’t over’. I just pretend to not see it and we flew back to town. ~Later~ “There you are. We were starting to get worried.” Minuette said as she and Ditzy greeted us at the front gate. “So did you get all our supplies Colgate?” I asked as Silver and I landed. “It’s Minuette, and yes we did.” She said and added a glared at me, but I thought it was adorable looking. “And you guys had a good tim-Where’s Derange?” I asked as I looked for that little troublemaker. “Oh, he ‘offered’ to babysit Dinky for the day while Derpy and I caught up on old times.” She said. “And to have some fun.” Ditzy added. “I mean, I love my little muffin with all my heart, but it’s nice to go out with some friends and cut loose.” She said with a sheepish grin. “Yup, totally understandable.” I said with a nod. “And speak of the devils, or actually devil, there’s Dinky.” I said and pointed towards the little yellow haired filly as she walked over towards us. “Hi, muffin.” Derpy said as she nuzzled Dinky. “How was your day?” She asked. “It was fun. Derange and I walked all over the town and then we drew and colored for a bit.” Dinky said with a smile which then turned into a frown. “But then he got into a scuffle with a-” She tried to say, but then a loud audible moan range out. “Deran-WHAT THE BUCK HAPPENED TO YOU?”  I yelled. Laying on Dinky’s back was--obviously--Derange, but he was now sporting bruises and cuts all over his body. Both of his wings were bent in odd directions, his antler horn was gone while is changeling horn was barely hanging on. Both of his eyes had nasty black eyes around them and his tooth that stuck out was missing. “Derange what happen you look like-” I tried to asked, but was interrupted. “You look like shit.” Silver bluntly stated and then added with a grin. “I mean you look even more like shit” “Buck you too, Silver.” He said and attempted to show her the bird, but instead cried out in pain at the attempt of lifting his arm. “Derange what happened?” I asked again. “…tripped down some stairs.” He said. “…Horse feathers.” We all said at the exact same time. “I got slapped by some random lunatic with a large trout.” He said. “That doesn’t even make any sense.” Minuette said while we nodded in agreement. “Ok, I got caught peeping.” He said. “Well, that is the most likely case, but I don’t think mares would beat you that senseless.” I said. “We would.” Was the female response I got back…and that just happened to be every female in ear shot. Dinky raised her hoof like how a kid holds up their hand to answer/ask a question. “Yes Dinky? I asked. “I know what happened, but Derange told me not to tell you.” She said. “Dinky, you promised.” Derange said with a low growl. “But-” She said but was interrupted. “Nope you-” Derange tried to say but his mouth was sealed up by a light glow. “Don’t worry, Dinky, now why don’t you tell us what happened.” Minuette said with an evil grin spreading across her face. “But mommy always told me never to tell somepony’s secret.” She said with a conflicted look. “That’s right muffin, you shouldn’t, unless it could bring harm to somepony else.” Derpy said as she gave a reassuring nuzzle. “Well, Derange got into a figh.t” she said. “Not surprised.” I said with a roll of my eyes. “So who did he get into a fight with?” I asked. ‘Hopefully I won’t have to go apologize or something like that.’ “With a butterfly.” She said. We were all silent as we processed this information. “I’m sorry, Dinky, I think I misheard you. Did you say a butterfly?” I asked getting a ‘Yeah’ from her. We all looked at one another than to Derange and then back to one another. “Bwhahahahahahahaha!” We all laughed and broke down to hysterical laughing fits. Me on the ground clutching my side, Derpy and Colgate leaning against one another and having trouble breathing while Silver holding back her laughter while clutching her side. “I hate you all.” Derange said now being released from Minuette’s magical grip. ~Even Later~ After getting over our laughing fit, which lasted a good hour straight, we finally decided to go get some grub and then retire for the evening. Silver and Minuette were sharing a room, while Dinky and Ditzy shared a place to sleep so that left me with Derange.  “Ow~” He whined as he laid down on a pillow. “Shut up already. You reap what you sow.” I said as I laid down on my back staring at the ceiling. “I got suckered punch…and kicked…and slapped…and-” He said making a huge list about how he got owned by a butterfly. ‘That shit is still funny.’ I thought as I snickered at the image of Derange getting his ass handed to him by one. “Screw you” He said. “Hey, stay outta my head and that wouldn’t happen.” I retorted. “It’s our mind so it can’t be helped.” He spat back. “Whatever. Maybe next time you won’t pick a fight you can’t win.” I said with a cheeky grin. “….Shut up and go to sleep.” He said and turned his back towards me. With a yawn I turned to my side as well and took a look outside the window the heavenly bodies glowing beautiful just as I was about to call it a night, I remembered something important, a piece of information I didn’t want to share at the time with Silver. “Derange?” I asked making sure he was still awake. “Yeah?” He responded. “Does the term ‘End Game’ ring any bells?” I asked thinking since he’s more attuned to chaos magic than I am he would have a better idea or at least a thought. He was silent for a few moments either contemplating the answer, trying to remember or was asleep. “No, but it does scream bad news.” He responded. We then said goodnight to one another and then fell asleep. The next few days came and went as we made our way back to the borders of Equestria and made our way west along her borders. Nothing of great interest happened…except the fact that because of Derange, Dinky was now sporting a plush size version of the companion cube on her bag…I hate him so much right now. If he hadn’t been acting like a child, we wouldn’t have been forced to ‘give’ it to Dinky in the first place. Though I guess she’d get more of kick out of it then I would have and besides I was considering showboating it in front of the other chess pieces anyways. So, meh, I guess life suck, move on and etcetera etcetera. Anyways like I was saying nothing of interest happened and we set up camp for the evening. Dinky and Ditzy were fast asleep, Ditzy using her wing as a blanket for Dinky while Dinky used Ditzy’s body as a pillow. The d’aws were so much. Minuette was wide awake messing around with that sonic screwdriver occasionally muttering profanity and resuming her work. Silver was lying down and looked like she was asleep. Looked being the keyword as every so often her ears would move to the sound of a twig snapping or a bush rustling. I was passing the time by keeping the fire alive every so often stroking it with a stick or throwing another log of wood into it. I then as quietly as I could, got up and started to head away from the camp. “Where are you going?” Silver asked not even opening her eyes to look at me. “Evening stroll.” I replied back. “…Very well.” She said and got up to join me. “That won’t be necessary and besides I would rather be alone.” I consoled with her, but she just gave me a look that said too bad. ‘Derange give me a hand here.’ I thought to Derange. “What he means is that he needs to go take a piss and while if you’re into that you’re more than welcome to join us, but-” Derange said as he popped on out of my head and onto my shoulder, but didn’t get to finish his sentence as a pinecone hit him right in the face. “Ow~” He whined now rubbing his face. Derange was pretty much healed up the day we left, when asked how his response was ‘I got better’ and we left it at that. Silver was back to lying down while Minuette continued her work and completely ignoring her surroundings. After walking far enough away so that we could barely see the fire from the campsite I stopped in the middle of the forest. The wind blowing my hair dramatically as I waited for the ninjas to appear…oh wait not ninjas, but you know that scene where the hero stands in the open and gets surrounded by like a group of people imagine that. ‘Derange did the others have…it on them.’ I thought to my counterpart. ‘Not that I saw.’ He replied as he hovered in the air behind me. ‘On my mark catch it.’ I thought to him as I stared up towards the moon. A minute passed and as I gazed up towards the heavens I shouted,“Now Derange!” I then felt something jump off my back and tried to fly away, but it wasn’t quick enough as Derange swiped a glass bottle in front of it. “Ha! Got you, you…whatever you are.” Derange shouted with glee. For a lack of a better word--or more like having trouble describing it--it was a dead bug that was somehow alive and trying to escape my magical bottle thing…Zelda logic. “So, what’s your take on this…thing Derange.” I asked my counterpart as I held the bottle in my hands, the bugs unnaturally purple eyes watching my every move. “Hmmmmm.” He said and grabbed the bottle starting at the contents like how one inspects wine before they drink it. He then turned the bottle in different direction, the bug still watching us, and then literally started to shake it, twist it, and other means that would make someone dizzy. “I’d have to say it’s a ‘bug on the wall’ or a spy in layman terms.” He answered as he threw the bottle carelessly towards me, which I caught. Thank you seven years of baseball. “So, we're being spied on…I don’t think I like that.” I said as I looked the bug over once more, surprisingly the bug seemed fine and dandy granted it is an undead bug spy thing. “Then again if I was given the chance/opportunity I’d do the same thing.” “So what’s the verdict?” He asked me. I stared right into the creature's eyes and said in a cheery mood, “Let it go, though whoever you are if you’d be a sport and spy on me from a distance that would be swell-” then Derange finished for me, “But if you harm anyone close to us, well, let’s just say I have a particular set of skills. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you just continue to spy on us and do nothing about it, then that will be the end of that. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t take my warning serious and harm someone, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you.” He said and threw the bottle at a tree. “Got it pal?” With that said and done we made our way back to camp.