“I knew something was going to go wrong today, but this is hooves down the craziest mess I’ve ever found myself in,” mumbled Twilight.
“Quack,” agreed the duck on her head.
But alas, there was no time to ponder the craziness. The portal spewing cookie dough needed to be closed before it was too late. So, with a resigned sigh, Twilight pointed a hoof towards the gaping hole in the sky.
“Onward!” she cried.
The green velociraptor Twilight was riding didn’t respond, but his jetpack still ignited. They quickly rose up into the air, leaving a sparkling trail of glitter as they charged into battle.
As they flew towards the horror that awaited them, Twilight’s pink polka dot cape bellowed in the wind, though what little awe this might have inspired was rather ruined by the hideous plaid pajamas she was also wearing.
Once they were close, but not quite close enough, Twilight lifted her mini cannon, taking care not to set it off prematurely.
“You ready?” Twilight asked the ammunition.
“Mudkip!” the little blue fish creature affirmed.
“Quack!” added the duck.
Still feeling rather uncertain about the plan, Twilight aimed the cannon towards the portal, and pulled the trigger, causing a series of four explosions that launched the poor mudfish towards certain doom.
But as the mudkip neared the portal, it opened its mouth, and fired a beam of pure sunlight right into the heart of the monstrosity. There was an unnaturally, otherworldly screech as the cookie dough thrashed about. Then, at last, the horror retreated back to the void, and the portal was closed.
The velociraptor quickly swept forward, and Twilight was able to catch the mud fish before it hit the ground.
“I can’t believe that actually worked. You alright, little guy?” asked Twilight.
“Kip!” the mudkip nodded.
“Quack,” the duck added, rather unhelpfully.
And so, victorious, Twilight rode the raptor back down to her friends and fellow Princesses. Everyone was safe, but clearly more than a little shaken by what they had just witnessed.
“Well, that was certainly a thing that happened,” noted Applejack.
“Yes. Pray tell, how did things get this ludicrous?” asked Princess Luna, trying and failing to keep her disappointment from showing.
“There was a perfectly rational, if ridiculous if it happened anywhere other than Ponyville, series of events that lead to this mess. No, I don’t want to talk about it,” said Twilight with a shake of her head.
“Indeed. I hope you don’t mind, but I think we’ll skip the stained glass window for this one,” added Celestia.
“Fine by me. I just want to get out of this hideous thing, clean myself up, and go to bed. It’s been one of those days,” said Twilight with a shake of her head.
“Quack,” added the duck.
“And get this duck off my head,” added Twilight.