Fluttershy yawned as she entered their kitchen, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "Good morning, Shyfly!" Discord called from the kitchen counter. He was standing in front of a skillet, wearing a pink apron that read Chaos the Chef in purple, hoof-embroidered letters, while the smell of pancakes was heavy in the air.
"I hope you don't mind that I started making breakfast," he said, flipping a pancake. "But, well...it's still early in the morning, but for you, this is practically sleeping in!"
She glanced over at the clock. He was right—most ponies would consider the hour a perfectly fine, maybe even early, time to wake up, but she tended to rise much earlier. "...I guess that double date wore me out more than I thought," she said sheepishly. "At least there's nothing I need to check on in the sanctuary today."
"The wonder of volunteers," he said, sliding a pancake onto a plate as she took her seat at the table, yawning again. He walked over and set the pancake in front of her, as well as a tall glass of chocolate milk.
"Thank you," she said. He smiled, and the two of them briefly tapped their noses together before he stood back up and went to the stove, leaving her to enjoy her pancake.
She noticed that there was an intricate design of a Neighponese-dragon-like Saddlemon on top of the pancake. "Ooh," she said admiringly, poking at it with her fork. It smeared a bit, but didn't pour away like she would have expected syrup alone to do.
"I'll make a couple more while you enjoy that one," Discord said cheerfully from the counter. She smiled and thanked him, taking a few bites of her pancake. Mmm...that Saddlemon was definitely chocolate syrup. Chocolate syrup that somehow got just under the surface of the pancake without the design smearing...
She lifted her eyes to curiously watch him as he worked. He flipped a cooked pancake over to the plate in front of him, and then held up...a needle. She rose an eyebrow, taking a sip of her milk.
He dipped the needle into a pot of chocolate syrup...and then, began to rapidly move the needle in and out of the pancake. His hands became a blur as he grabbed another needle and began to work, shifting between the pancake and the chocolate syrup.
In just a minute, he dropped the needles into the sink and brought over the pancake. This one had a heart on it...no, that was a heart-shaped fish. "What do you think?" he asked, putting the plate in front of her.
"It looks...amazing," she said. "But...Discord, are you trying to tell me something with the way you're making these, or are you just doing this for fun?"
He smirked, sitting next to her and taking a long sip of chocolate milk. "I don't know," he said in the taunting tone of someone who did know. "Why don't you tell me what I did to the pancakes, and if it's a message or not?"
She took a slow bite of her pancake, savoring it. He snapped up a bowl of cereal-sized pancakes in milk, each of them emblazoned with a letter—either 'A', 'T', or 'O'...
"With the needles, you were tattooing these pancakes!" she said in realization. He smirked and nodded. "And, so...are you doing it for fun, or saying you want to try those fake tattoos today?"
"And Miss Fluttershy is right on both counts!" he said, clapping as stock cheering came from nowhere. "And for a reward, you get a free fake tattoo! Or about a dozen of them, if you want."
She smiled. "Well...why not? It does sound fun, and we did get quite a few from last night..."
"Excellent!" he said, rubbing his hands together. "I'll get the 'parlor' set up."
He stood up and turned towards the living room, but she quickly reached forward and grabbed his wrist. "Not before you finish breakfast," she said. "You know that it's an important meal!"
"Ah, fine," he said, sitting back down and taking another bite of tiny pancakes. "Do you want any more pancakes?"
"I'll see in a second," she said, placing the heart-fish pancake on top of the Saddlemon one. "These two might be enough for me today."
The two of them continued to eat, Discord occasionally snapping up fruit for the two of them, or more tiny pancakes for himself. But eventually, both of their dishes were clean (besides the pancake-and-milk sludge at the bottom of Discord's bowl).
"Now may I set up the parlor?" he said. "Please, pretty please?" Their dishes all sprouted spider-like legs and began to scurry their way towards the sink.
"I suppose so," she said. "Though...what all do you need to add to the living room to make it into a parlor, anyway?"
"Oh, nothing much," he said standing up and strolling in that direction. "Just the tattoos, a bowl of water to be able to transfer the tattoos...oh, and a bit of redecorating, of course!"
She followed behind him, stopping in the doorway beside him. He held up his claws and began to snap at a rapid tempo. With flashes of magic, the walls became darker, and covered with images of 'edgy' tattoos. The curtains were replaced with ones that had flaming patterns on them, and a neon sign reading 'Skin Art' appeared above the couch.
"That should do it," he said, looking at his handiwork and nodding. "What do you think?"
"It's...interesting," she said, stepping into the room. "I suppose it makes me think of a tattoo parlor...but I don't really know what the inside of those look like."
"Eh, maybe I exaggerated things a bit," he said.
"When do you not?" she asked with a grin, causing him to chuckle.
Discord grabbed a lever that suddenly appeared beside him and pulled down. A panel on the ceiling popped open right above him...and he disappeared under a pile of fake tattoos.
"Discord, are you alright?" she said, stepping forward and digging through the pile. Discord's head popped out the top of the pile, scattering several of the small pieces of paper. There was a wide grin on his face.
"Perfectly fine," he said, stepping out of the pile. It collapsed at his movement, spreading and flattening across the floor. "Now, are you ready to get crazy with tattoos?"
"I...yeah!" she said, "But Discord...when did you get this many? I don't think we managed to get all of this from that machine last night."
He shrugged. "Oh, I've picked them up here and there. Free gifts at events of some kind, in the backs of magazines, creating them myself whenever I got bored...." With a flick of his claws, the tattoos shivered and flew back up to form a tall pile. "We don't have to use all of these, of course."
"Right," she said with a nod. "But...we need hot water to get started, right?"
"You've hit the nail on the head," he said with a grin, spinning a rubber mallet in his paw. He smacked the wall, and a bowl dropped from the ceiling, landing on top of his head.
He dropped the mallet, grabbed the bowl, and used his tail to scoop up a small pile of the tattoos. "Here," he said. "Why don't you pick out a few that you'd really like, while I get this thing ready?"
She nodded, sitting down on the couch and putting the tattoos on the table in front of her. Whether by random chance, or Discord's magic, there were quite a few tattoos in the pile that she liked—several Saddlemon ones, a few cutie mark ones from last night, and one Skullcrushers' logo.
"Thank you," she said, setting her favorites into a separate pile. "I think it'll be fun, trying this and having these for a few days."
"Yeah...enjoy it for a few days, then wash it off when you're through," he said, the bowl floating and slowly spinning in front of him. She nodded in agreement.
"I'm guessing you've never thought of getting a real tattoo?" he asked, preparing the bowl of hot water...by creating jets of steaming water from his palm that smelled of lemons and sulfur.
She rapidly shook her head. "It always seemed too scary," she said. "A-and painful...no design really seemed worth going through the process."
He made a noise of agreement, patting her hoof. "And...what about you?" she asked.
"Hmm?" he said, his ears perking up.
"Did you ever think about getting a real tattoo?" she clarified. "I mean...you're much braver than I am. And having more colors on your skin seems very 'you', if I'm being honest."
"Hmm," he said, stroking his beard. After thinking a few moments, he said, "I did like the idea of tattoos, at one point. For a while, I actually had some!" He held up a Polaroid photo of himself in his younger years—short horns, and with a long ponytail, showing off a tornado tattoo on his arm. But before she could spot any other details, the photo was engulfed in flames.
He tossed the flaming photo out the window, where strong winds started to tear it into embers. "But that didn't last long," he said. "I eventually got bored with any designs I chose, and ripped them right out of my skin! I could never think of anything that I would never regret having for the rest of my long life."
"Ah..." she said.
"On that note, I honestly never understood pony fascination with cutie marks," he said. "Oh, sure, maybe a couple of my tattoos were ideas of what a cutie mark I got would look like, but I would get bored of those in like a month, tops. How could you ponies stand having the same flank markings for the rest of your life?"
"Maybe because it's destiny?" she said. "And...we earn our cutie marks, instead of choosing something we might get bored of. That probably has something to do with it."
"Hmm. Probably," he said with a nod. He placed the bowl in between the two of them on the table, then dropped a small pile of his own fake tattoos next to it. "Ready to start?" She beamed and nodded, and he snapped a washcloth into the bowl.
"I think we both know which one to start with," Discord said with a smile. He held up that final tattoo from last night—the two halves of a heart, saying 'Together Forever'. She beamed and nodded, sliding her left hoof over to press it against his paw.
Sticking out his tongue, he placed the sheet of paper on their wrists, carefully arranging it so that they would each get a half. Once it was ready, he slowly pulled his claw away, reaching for the washcloth.
She reached over to gently hold the corner in place, to make sure it wouldn't accidentally fall off. He smiled at her, then gently pressed the damp, hot cloth on the back of the tattoo.
They waited for a minute or so, Discord tapping his dragon foot to some kind of tune that only he knew. But, once a few minutes had passed, he lifted up the washcloth and began to slowly, gently peel away the paper.
The tattoo had been successfully transferred onto their coats. "Well, looks like I'm a better tattoo artist than I thought," he said smugly, holding up his wrist to examine the good job he had done.
She smiled, looking at the heart half on her own wrist. "It is really nice," she said. With a smile, she reached up at tapped her wrist against his again, so that the halves formed one heart.
"Together forever," she said.
"Together forever," he repeated with a smile. He slowly leaned forward to tap his nose against hers. She closed her eyes and pressed her nose against his...then tilted her muzzle upwards to meet his lips in a kiss.
They remained like that for a few moments—eyes closed, lips locked, and wrists together. Then, they slowly pulled apart, smiling and gazing at each other warmly.
"So, my fiance slash wife," he purred, getting a small chuckle out of her. "Which tattoo would you like next?"
"Well...I don't know," she admitted. "I was thinking of putting on this small one, of my cutie mark, but wouldn't that be a little...self-centered?"
She glanced over at Discord from the tattoo she had been looking at, and saw that he was looking at himself in a mirror, holding a tattoo of his own smiling face and considering possible locations. "What was that?" he asked as his reflection clicked its tongue and made finger guns at him.
"Oh...nothing," she said, holding back a giggle.
"Say...here's an idea," he said. He took the cutie mark tattoo from her, twirling it in his claw. "Why don't we...each get one that represents both us?" With a flick of his fingers, he flared out two tattoos of her cutie mark, and two tattoos of his face.
"Oh, so we can match even more?" she said.
"And have a way to keep the other with us, have a way to tell off anyone who claims we're being self-centered—all that sentimental, organ-melting mushy stuff," he said, handing her two of the tattoos.
"Thank you," she said. After a bit of thought, she decided to put Discord's tattoo on her upper foreleg. Discord was placing her cutie mark on his upper arm, mirroring her, and snapped a second washcloth into the bowl of water.
They both took a cloth and pressed the tattoo against their skin. After a bit of waiting, they peeled off the paper, then moved over to their other arm or foreleg with the other tattoo.
"After this," he said as he pressed the cloth against the tattoo of himself. "We should do different tattoos. I love matching with you, but you know that too much sentimentality makes my insides all mushy and gushy."
"That's fair," she said. "I wouldn't expect us to match perfectly. Which one will you do next?"
"This one!" he said, using his tail to whip out a tattoo of a black Neighponese dragon. "What about you?"
"Well..." She glanced back over at her selection of tattoos. All of them looked so good...the one she liked most should go next, right?
Using her wing, she pushed choices away one by one—until she was left with two tattoos she couldn't decide between. One was a sparkling, pink-and-green-winged butterfly, while the other was a large Pikaroo—maybe it was a bit cliche, but she couldn't help but love the popular Saddlemon.
"I think that's enough time on these," Discord said, bringing her out of her thoughts. The two of them removed their cloths and slowly peeled away the papers, leaving clear, crisp images behind.
"And now, moving right along..." he said. He dropped his washcloth back into the bowl, then looked at the dragon tattoo. After stroking his beard for a few seconds, he placed it on his cheek.
"Are you sure it's safe to put it on your face?" she asked.
"Eh, it shouldn't be more dangerous than putting it anywhere else on my body," he said with a shrug. "As long as it doesn't end up in my eye, I mean."
He tilted it at an angle, then reached for the washcloth. He pressed it against his face, then leaned his elbow on the table. "Besides, even if it was unsafe..." A neon sign appeared above him, with the words 'Immortal Lord of Chaos!'
She giggled, blushing a little. "Oh, right..."
He patted her head. "It's sweet that my safety means so much to you, though," he said with a smile. Her blush deepened, but her smile also grew.
"Anyway...which one will you do next?" he asked.
"That's a good question," she said. "I'm stuck between these two." She showed him the butterfly and the Saddlemon. "And I'm not sure where to put them, either..."
"Shoulders and ankles tend to be popular locations," he suggested. "And why not both?"
"Well...hmm," she said. She held the butterfly near her back hoof and nodded, then turned her attention back to the Saddlemon one. "I don't think this would be a good ankle one, or shoulder one...it's a bit big, and I don't want to smear it trying to curl in around."
"You make a good point," he said. He stared at it for a few seconds, then declared, "Either I could shrink it, or put it on your back."
"...I like the sound of putting it on my back best," she decided with a nod.
"Want a hand with that?" he asked, slowly peeling the paper off of his face. The dragon design ended up a little...patchy, with parts of the ink missing, but she did have to admit that it looked cool.
"Yes, please," she said. He took the Pikaroo tattoo and grabbed another cloth from the bowl, while she turned her back to him, bending to press the butterfly tattoo just above her left back hoof.
She flinched slightly as she felt the warm cloth press against her back. Her wing feathers fluffed up. "Sorry," Discord said, continuing to spread the cloth over the full area of the tattoo. "I'll give a better warning next time."
"I'd appreciate it," she said. She tried to reach for a cloth, but her hoof could only find empty table. She suddenly felt something wet and warm being pressed against her hoof, and glanced up enough to see that Discord was using his tail to offer it to her.
"Thank you," she said, taking it and using it to press the butterfly tattoo against her skin.
After a few minutes, he began to peel the tattoo off of her back. A few seconds later, she started to peel away the butterfly. A few bits of ink hadn't managed to get onto her coat or skin, but most of it had.
"What do you think you'll do next?" Discord asked, dropping the washcloth into the bowl.
"...I think I might put this one on my other ankle," she said, showing off a tattoo covered with a swarm of tiny butterflies. "What about you?"
He stroked his beard, then snapped his fingers and created a blindfold over his eyes. "I'll pick at random!" he declared. "Because even if I grab something I don't like, it'll wash right out."
She smiled, watching him for a few moments as his hand fumbled for the tattoo pile on the table. With a small giggle, she reached over to nudge all of them a little closer to him, before grabbing the washcloth to start on her own tattoo.
An hour just seemed to fly by, each of them grabbing tattoos they wanted (or in Discord's case, occasionally letting fate chose which tattoo he should get). They were now absolutely covered with ink—Fluttershy's legs and back were covered, with a couple on her wings and a stray one on her neck, while Discord seemed to have tried to fit at least one tattoo on each of his mismatched parts...including the unrecognizable blobs of ink on his horns.
"I think we look good," he declared, looking at himself in a hand mirror. "...well. More than we already do."
She smiled. "I think these tattoos suit you." He was even more vibrant and colorful than usual...it was nice.
"You look amazing, too!" he insisted. With a snap of his fingers, a full-length mirror appeared in front of them. "Why, just look at you! Your beauty, accented by your feelings and interests on your sleeve..."
She laughed, stepping a bit closer to the mirror, seeing in the reflection that he was standing just behind and beside her. It was odd, seeing all the colors and shapes on her fur, but it didn't look bad, not at all. And it did feel nice to show her interests (and feelings) off, as he had said. She turned to look at him with a slight smile, giving him a nod. He smirked smugly, patting the top of her head.
"Oh, I can't wait to show these off to our friends!" he said, posing and looking at himself from every angle in the mirror. "Why, we'll be the most eye-catching and colorful creatures at the Council meeting...more than we already are."
His words made her freeze. She had nearly forgotten that their next Council meeting was coming up soon...in just two days, actually! And if they went to the meeting like this, that meant...
"...ponies are going to take photos of us during and after the council meeting," she said in realization. "What will they say if they think we've gotten tattoos?"
"Oh, probably just the usual conspiracies," he said with a shrug. "Someone will theorize that they're fake and there's no meaning besides we wanted to do it, and will probably be laughed off. Then, the tattoos will wash off, but nearly everyone will have forgotten about them by the next Council meeting."
"You think so?" she said.
"I'm almost positive," he said. "Besides, didn't you all learn some sort of lesson years back that what the general public thinks of you doesn't matter at the end of the day?"
"That's...one way of interpreting that lesson," she said with a slow nod. "I guess I'm still just a little nervous about what others think."
"Well, dahling," he said, placing a hand on his hip. "You are the most fabulous creature whose hooves have graced this land, and don't you forget that!" He smirked and snapped his claws sassily.
She giggled. "Even above yourself?" she asked teasingly.
"Well, I am fantabulous," he said smugly. "But I only have one hoof. You have hooves, plural." She chuckled, shaking her head.
"Now, what would you like to do next?" he asked. "...something without water would be best. I don't put much stock in the cheaper tattoos holding up for long."
She thought for a few moments. "What about a hike?" she suggested. "It feels like it's been a while since we visited Chaosville's forests."
He placed a hand dramatically against his forehead. "Too true! You're right, we simply must go right away and rectify this." He dropped down on all fours to hold her hoof, walking towards the door.
She smiled and followed, occasionally stealing glances over at the colorful tattoos he had chosen for himself. She caught him glancing over at her, and both of their gazes snapped away, the two of them chuckling to themselves.
Maybe ponies would start to gossip...but doing this had been fun. In the end, wasn't that what had mattered? She smiled and nodded at her reasoning (and Discord's earlier reassurances), leaning against her husband's shoulder with a smile.