A Nightmare in Ponyville

By Paleo Prints

Chapter 3: Blood Red Sandman

Snails had once compared Sweetie Belle to a machine. To his offended friends, he quickly (for Snails) said that it wasn’t an insult. He only meant that while she sometimes took a while for her to take in new data, once the stunning young musician’s gears started spinning she cranked out ideas at a mean rate. Sweetie Belle’s musical laughter confirmed that she had felt complimented that day.

Snails would have understood what had happened after she left. Sweetie Belle shivered in the night air of Ponyville, looking for the offended Diamond Tiara. Her mind reeled with possible destinations for her friend, but she hadn’t yet noticed that night had fallen hours early.

Sweetie pushed through crowds of loitering townsfolk as she galloped across the town square. She scanned their faces, looking for Diamond’s perennial scowl of disappointment. Her eyes passed right over all the emotionless expressions without note.

“Diamond!” Sweetie called out as she slowed down, panting. “Dia, let’s talk about this.” She caught her breath and shook her head. “Why does everything with that mare have to be so arduous?”

She turned at the sound of Rarity’s voice. In her fugue, Sweetie had somehow ended up on the lawn of Carousel Boutique. She spared a second wondering if Rarity had renovated the building. The doors and windows seemed oddly out of proportion.

“Rarity!” Sweetie galloped to her sister’s side in excitement. “Rarity, I need your help. Two of my friends are fighting.” She smiled. “Don’t you have a degree in friendship by now?”

Her sister was garbed in full work mode. Several tape measures lay draped across her back. Her scarlet glasses sat on a charming yet asymmetrical angle of the bridge of her muzzle. Rarity massaged her chin thoughtfully as she tilted her head, giving her mane an effortless bouncy flourish that always made her little sister jealous. “This has something to do with that Diamond Tiara, I predict. I’ll bet my tail on it.”

Sweetie nodded, sitting back on her haunches like a young filly. She waited for her sister’s pronouncement.

Rarity placed a hoof on Sweetie’s shoulder. “Dear sister, you must remember to keep up appearances. Even if her companionship is hard, the social connection she represents is invaluable. She’s motivated, funny, and could use a friend to steer her right.”

Sweetie nervously shifted to one side. “Rarity, did you have a hooficure? Why is your hoof so… fluffy?”

Sweetie suddenly spun in surprise as Rarity’s voice suddenly sounded from behind her.

Impossibly, Rarity stepped out from behind Opal’s favorite climbing tree. This sister bore the marks of a stressful night, a beautiful dress hanging off of her in tatters. Some kind of red mark stood out on her neck.

The newcomer flashed and indulgent smile at her confused sister. “My dear, do remember your older friends. Why, I swoon at the thought of that pink harpy insulting poor Apple Bloom! Remember your priorities!”

The original Rarity pushed her hoof down on Sweetie, the bottom flattening and spreading out in a boneless mass. “But good friends should understand your social choices.”

Sweetie Belle pushed the soft dressmaker away in panic, her hooves finding Rarity’s coat strangely smooth and yielding to the touch. “Alright, what’s going on here?”

The disheveled Rarity stepped closer, blocking of Sweetie’s retreat. “Why don’t you let Diamond leave if she wills it? After all, you could spend time with that nice Snips boy.” She bounced her mane and battered her eyelashes at Sweetie. “I think he’s going to grow up wonderfully.”

The dressmaker stomped. “But I do insist on you getting a young stallion who’ll help your status, dear. We Ponyville girls must work to better ourselves in this world.”

Sweetie ducked to the side as the party mare reached out a forelimb that bent in too many ways. She glared at her twin sisters as she backed away from the pair. “I don’t know what you two are doing, but I’m going to Twilight. Whatever happened, she’ll fix it.”

The Rarities blinked. They turned to each other in confusion. Suddenly, they both smiled.

As Sweetie turned to run she felt the ground pull away. Her “sisters” smiled in triumph as their horns glowed, drawing Sweetie to them through the air.

“Help! Apple Bloom! Snips!” The terrified teen writhed as the Rarities placed their hooves on her. The socialite wrapped her hooves around Sweetie’s shoulders as the workhorse’s limbs twirled around Sweetie’s legs like tentacles. “Anypony, please help! Scootaloo!”

“Darling,” the partygoer said with breath that smelled of cider, “I insist that you keep you best friends in mind.”

“However,” the dressmaker continued as she strained, “I want you to have the opportunities I never had at you age.”

Tears filled Sweetie’s eyes. “Rarity, you’re hurting me.” As the pliable ponies tugged on her ends, she smelled a sweet scent. Bizarrely, her mind flashed onto a Cutie Mark Crusaders campfire sleepover.

“You must remember to be a proper lady, respectful of all your connections!”

Sweetie felt her mid-section distend. Agony seared through her stomach as she saw herself stretch like a piece of taffy. She heard the sound she had always associated with Pinkie stepping on a balloon.

“Please, stop!” Sweetie struggled to escape the boneless Rarities. She turned to the side as another voice joined the fray.

“Remember this, dear.” A Rarity in a bathrobe smiled as she approached. “Your singing lessons are paramount.” She wrapped her hooves around Sweetie’s midsection.

“But never neglect your education!” A Rarity in a sun-dress gave Sweetie a reproachful look. “I will not abide a slip in your grades.”

Sweetie closed her eyes as the pain increased. “Rarity, stop! You’re tearing me apart.”

The agony stopped for a second. Sweetie opened her eyes. The Rarities were sharing confused looks with each other. As one, they all sighed and gave Sweetie a look of long-suffering patience.

“Sweetie, darling,” they said in unison. “I’m only doing this for your own good.”

The dressmaker brightened, turning to her doppelgangers. “Now then, shall we give this our best try?”

The Rarities nodded as one. As Sweetie started screaming, something chuckled darkly from the shadows.

In the Ponyville where the sun yet shined, three friends stared each other uncomfortably. Snips pushed himself up from the table first.

“Celestia spank me hard, I screwed up!” As he moved towards the door, Apple Bloom blocked him with a hoof. “Ah, come on Abby. I gotta go apologize!”

She raised an eyebrow. “One, don’t call me Abby. Two, she need some time to cool down. Three, say mah full bucking name and don’t call me Abby!”

Snips breathed out in annoyance. “Yeah? Well, how do you know what she needs?” He moved to slip around her hoof.

Apple Bloom jumped to her hooves in front of her. “Alright, Snippy, pay attention. I’ve known her since we were blank flanks. Also, you always come to me for advice on her anywho. Finally, I happen to be a girl too, silly!”

Snips ground his hooves into the ground as he tried to control his breathing. He flashed a guilty look at Apple Bloom and nodded. Sudden squinting at her, Snips frowned. “Snippy?”

Apple Bloom raised her head triumphantly. “You keep calling me Abby and I’ll spread that one.”

The two teens jumped back as a pink blur flashed between them. Pinkie Pie balanced on her roller-skates, holding a tray of root beer floats on each hoof and her head. “Howdy-hoo! How’re things hanging for my Cutie Mark Crusaders! Except you’re not crusading for cutie marks, anymore. Are you the Hormone-Headed Heroes now?” As Pinkie talked she spun on one skate, spinning her waitress skirt and managing to drip not a single drop of malt on her uniform.

Pinkie nodded, making the sounds of ice cubes clinking against each. “Of course! I thought she looked sad, too.”

Snips and Apple Bloom exchanged a glance. Snails stepped onto the floor. “She’s right. That girl looked like she was in terrible trouble.”

Snips snorted. “Maybe she’s from some alternate universe. She may be the kind and good Diamond Tiara.”

Pinkie nodded. “I was thinking to myself and wondering about trampolines and marzipan and I thought, ‘Golly, that filly looks sad. Someone her age and gender should go see what’s wrong.’”

Apple Bloom swallowed. “Yes, ma’am!” She saluted unsteadily as she walked toward the mare’s room.

“Glad we’re in agreement! Oh, if you see Truffle and Twist say that they’ve missed their afternoon Double-Straw Delight two days in a row! Ta-ta!” Pinkie Pie skated away on one hoof.

Snips peered at his heterosexual life-partner skeptically. “Did you two just actually communicate any information?”

Snips shrugged and sat down. He contemplated the table before calling out to the counter.

In the restroom, Screwball stared at the white filly on the other side of the bathroom mirror. She turned around briefly, confirming that she was indeed alone on this side of the glass. Screwy looked back at the sadly-smiling pegasus who leaned on the reversed-counter in the reflection.

Surprise sighed. She turned on the faucet on her side, splashing water onto her faces. Black, brown, and red substances pooled into the sink.

“You know me,” she said looking up. “You absolutely know me because we met each other and it counts even if it was only in a dream and its kinda dreamy now and I have to talk quickly because he’s coming. Do you mind if I wash myself? I feel like yuck warmed over.”

Screwball pulled herself onto the mirror, shaking and sweating. For years she had dreaded this. The only time she met her creator (she couldn’t bear to use the word “father” even in her mind), she learned the reason for her life. She was a joke, badly wired. The strain she put on her body by acting “normal” sometimes lead her to the obvious conclusion.

Why make a joke to last? Screwball had thought that hallucinations would be the first sign. She shook with trepidation at the thought that she was finally breaking down.

Surprise peered in confusion. “You talk funny. When we hang out or picnic or ride the Galaxy Express you talk fine. Where does the weird come in? “

Screwball’s eyes widened in recognition. “You and me haven’t met before.”

The white ball of energy nodded, almost vibrating into a blur. “Yuppers! We met in dreams, Silly-Dilly-One-Eyed-Willy! You and me and Jake and Finn and Marceline, remember? Only… ”

“Surprise is fake!” Screwball leapt onto the counter and squeezed her face into the mirror. “Surprise! Don’t come out and meet Cheerilee and play! I have plenty of friends here.”

“Screwball, I’m trapped here. You need to get me out. You're the one who can get all of us out. Spike and Truffle and Twist and Featherweight and… ”

The mirror-bathroom’s door started to open. Screwball pounded on her mirror in frustration.

Surprise started to flicker. With eyes wide and quick breathing she screamed at Screwball.

“It’s Discord! He’s come for the children. You have to save us! You have to find the Funhouse and… ”

The door opened in both bathrooms. As Surprise disappeared, Screwball turned toward her own door with a snarl.

Apple Bloom took a nervous backwards. Ah think this one is plumb loco. “Um, I came to see if you were okay, but if you wanna be alone… ”

Screwball raced toward the frightened filly. She reared up and grabbed Apple Bloom's shoulders.

Apple Bloom edged out of the imploring pony’s grasp. “Well, in that case, I’ll be outta here. Sorry for the inconvenience.” She retreated, keeping her front to the agitated stranger. Screwball leapt forward as Apple Bloom threw a defensive hoof in front of her face.

Apple Bloom waited for the fight to begin. She stared Screwball right in the eyes, remembering fighting advice Big Mac once gave her. As she stared into the spirals, one of them flared into crimson life. Red filtered out of the curves, filling the white of the eye. Apple Bloom stared in horrified fascination.

“Help me.” Screwball’s shoulders sagged. “Please help me. My name’s Screwball, and I have a… brain thing. It hurts to talk right for too long. I need help. My friend’s in trouble.” Liquid ran down Screwy’s cheeks, clear on one side and red on the other. “Please.”

A tightness rose in Apple Bloom’s chest as she saw the shuddering Screwball drop her head and stare away. She grabbed a rag off of the sink counter and wiped Screwy’s face off. Gently, she hooked a hoof around the hesitant young mare’s shoulder and pulled her out of the bathroom.

Apple Bloom gently guided Screwball into a stool and rubbed a hoof on her back. “Gentlecolts, this is Screwball. She’s got a… kinda… talking problem.”

Snips and Snails exchanged a look. Snails tapped his friend on the shoulder and gestured to Screwball. Snips rolled his eyes and nodded.

“Fine, bro,” he said under his breath, “I’ll get your initial d-data.”

Snails nodded contently. Snips leaned his forelimbs’ knees on the table and tried to look nonchalant. “So, uh, S-Screwball. How’re you feeling?”

Snails raised an eyebrow. His eyes made a circuit of Screwy’s facial features as she sniffed into a napkin. He stood up and left the table, drawing a baleful glare and an exasperated sigh from his girlfriend.

Apple Bloom placed a limb around the quivering girl. Screwball steadied herself.

“Duh, yeah,” agreed Snips. “Because, I mean even suggesting she was in the bathroom mirror… ”

Snails walked back to the table, carrying a tray with two drinks in his mouth. He placed it down as his friend stopped talking and joined in.

“…would be kinda implyin’ that there was somethin’ fundamentally wrong with the nature o’ things.”

Apple Bloom looked from her coltfriend to his best friend. “Um, should I leave you two alone?”

Screwball blew into her napkin. Snips looked at Apple Bloom and nodded. “I have no idea what’s happening.”

Snails gently tapped the table twice. Apple Bloom and Snips reached for the drinks before an interposing hoof blocked them. The lanky stallion cleared his throat, drawing Screwy’s attention.

“Um. Screwball. I brought you, um, chocolate and vanilla. Which one do you want?”

A hoof shot out toward the chocolate with lightning speed. Snails pushed it towards her, and Screwball grabbed the drink. Sounds like a quarry eel trying to drain a lake came from the slight young mare’s mouth.

“So, Screwball,” Snails continued conversationally. “Who’s not in trouble?”

Screwball noisily finished the drink and came up for air. “Discord’s taking the Ponyville kids to some kind of weird, evil not-so-funhouse.”

Snails sucked on his lower lip for a second. “Hrmm. Alright. Yeah, let’s go to Surprise’s house.”

Apple Bloom sputtered as she nearly failed to get coherent words out. “You really sure about this?”

“Hold on a second!” Apple Bloom stared at her coltfriend as he politely helped Screwball up.

Snips turned and shrugged. “Applegirly, you know my mate ‘bout as well as I do. Has he ever been wrong when he’s used the word ‘contemplate’ before?”

As the quartet of teens moved out into the street, Screwball looked at Snails with wonder. “Me don’t… Me mean, me always… “

She tackled him with her forelimbs, throwing both hooves around his neck. He nervously patted her back.

“Screwball,” he weakly sounded out. “I’m glad I could help, but if you choke me my girlfriend will mess you up.”

Screwball reared back onto both hooves, saluted Apple Bloom, and moved beside her to step in lockstep. Apple Bloom shook her head.

He shrugged. “We both think differently. We’re closer to each other than to most other ponies.”

Apple Bloom flashed Screwball an intimidating look. After a moment she looked away with a guilty expression, glad that Screwball hadn’t noticed..

Screwball’s hard-earned cheerfulness started to fade as her new friends lead her through the marketplace. She would have expected the three Ponyville teens to notice the atmosphere around them. On one side a street vendor was haggling half-heartedly as he discussed his son’s nightmares. A younger pegasus reclined on a bench, occasionally plucking one of her own feathers out as she started to nod off. Every few houses a poster of a smiling, bushy-haired filly had been hung. Screwball paced up to the flyer, parsing out the tear-stained mouthwriting.

Please look for my daughter, Twist. Last seen with Truffle. Reward offered for whereabouts.

“Screwy, I was so worried about you!” A warm neck pressed down across Screwy’s mane. “I’m so sorry,” Cheerilee said. Turning to her mother, Screwball saw reddened eyes.

“Miss Cheerilee?” Apple Bloom stepped cautiously toward the embracing ponies. “You’re… Screwball’s mom?”

Snails kept quiet, eyeing the encounter. Snips leaned over to his friend to whisper. “Wow. When we were colts did we realize how hot Cheerilee… ”

Snails place a hoof over his friend’s mouth and shook his head. He stared away for a second in thought. He then smiled and nodded, then cocked his head towards Screwball and raised his hoof to his lips with a shush…

Screwball rubbed her head into the familiar smell of her mother’s coat. Cheerilee caressed her mane and turned to her former students.

“Children! It’s so good to see you again. I’m so glad to see you spending time with Screwball.”

I’m glad I recognized the cutie marks, Cheerilee thought. It’s always hard to recognize old students when their cheekbones change.

Snips gave Screwball another look and gave a start. “Um, Miss Cheerilee? Where was she when w-w-we were growing up? She wasn’t locked in an attic or anything, r-right?”

Cheerilee sighed. “I adopted her in Old Canterlot. Kids, it’s great to see you grow so much.” She turned to Apple Bloom with shining eyes. “Where’s Sweetie and Scootaloo?”

Apple Bloom stammered incoherently. Snails stepped over, placing a hoof on her shoulder.

Cheerilee watched as her students exchanged looks with each other. Her smile returned as she saw how Snails was holding onto Apple Bloom. I guess the kids are alright. She turned to Screwball.

“Dear, if you’re okay I’m going to meet back up with Red. A few of my oldest friends are meeting me for some cider and flowers. Do you want to come with? Sparkler might be there.”

“No… no, I’ll be at Cuisine’s Café.” It’s just a coincidence, it has to be. “It’s great to see how you’ve all grown. I’m so proud of you.” Cheerilee kissed Screwball’s forehead.

As the children left her sight, Cheerilee turned toward their direction. She chewed her bottom lip until the singing of children drew her attention.

Cheerilee’s heart stopped. She looked behind her to see a group of young fillies running away with a jump rope. She sighed as her heart gradually slowed down. The pattering of rain distracted her from her worries.

Snips gingerly pushed the front door open, letting the sounds of the storm fill the shadowy house. “Miss Counter? Are you there?”

Screwball stepped past him into the house. Her eyes picked out the fragments of a dropped cup and saucer sitting in a pool of tea. The remains of a hot soup sat in the center of the table. From elsewhere in the house, Screwy could hear the sound of soft crying.

The group walked into the kitchen, confronting a trembling earth pony sitting in the floor. Her tears fell and mingled with a spreading pool of water that was feed by the overflowing kitchen counter, illuminated by the soft light that poured in through a hole not quite over the sink.

Coin Counter rubbed her eyes as she looked at Apple Bloom. “I… can’t stop it. I don’t know where she is and I can’t stop it.”

Apple Bloom nodded. Silently, she walked to the pantry and started rooting around. Screwball gave Snips a questioning look. He shrugged.

Apple Bloom walked out of the pantry with a toolkit in her mouth as she climbed onto the kitchen counter. Coin smiled thankfully as the teen began patching the hole.

Screwball saw Snails eyes light up with a mix of admiration and worship. “It’s what she does,” he concluded.

“Um, M-m-miss Counter?" Snips padded wetly through the room. "Have you seen Surprise lately?”

Coin sniffed and shook her head. “She was supposed to be with you all. She’s been gone for hours. I m-meant to go out and look, but it started raining and the roof leaked and I… ”

Apple Bloom leaned over her with a hoofkerchief in her mouth that Coin gratefully accepted.

Snips shuffled uncomfortably from hoof to hoof. “Um. Do you have any idea when she’d be home?”

Coin shook her head. “Now.” She blew her nose loudly. “She’d always come home when I felt this way. I can’t imagine what would keep her from me.”

Snips heard a door click open down the hallway. A quick check of the kitchen confirmed that Screwball had wandered away. “Eh,” he said. “So, do you mind if we check her room? Maybe for some kind of hint to where she went?”

Coin nodded as Snips breathed out relieved. Snails cast a look up . “Abby? Are you going to be okay here?”

Apple Bloom nodded, saying something in a reassuring voice through a mouthful of nails. Snails beamed as he walked away with Snips, who raised an eyebrow.

“Can’t believe you got away with the Abby thing. Hey buddy,” he said. “Wouldn’t it be cool if we were actually in one of those monster-horror plays?”

Snips snorted. “You? Ah, come on. Buddy, you’re the strong, silent leading stallion with the tough girlfriend. I’m the wise-cracking fatty with the s-sense of humor.” He giggled. “You and Abby would be fine. I’m the schmuck who gets it by the first intermission.”

Inside Surprise’s room Screwball stared in wonder at walls covered with elegant drawings of fantasies. Everyone in Ponyville wondered where Surprise got her tales of magic creations.

The artwork showed Surprise traveling through fantastical landscapes with bizarre creatures. One had Surprise riding a flying bed with strange creatures through a land of mirrors and ladders. Another showed her with a yellow dog and monkey-like things running through a field. Screwball was with her. A nearby sheet held a sketch of a fierce sea-pony knight labeled “Foamrider.” On the walls of Surprise’s room were the memories of a hundred pleasant dreams that Screwy had always held as her own personal treasures.

Screwball paced around the room, scrutinizing every corner. She stopped moving in the middle of the room and closed her eyes. Snips and Snails found her that way as they walked in. Noticing Screwy's concentration, Snails held a hoof in front of his friend.

Screwball opened her eyes. She scanned all of the written records posted along the room. Turning, she ran to a well-used inkpot and quills on her bedroom dresser. Nodding, Screwball flipped over Surprise’s bedroom pillow. A diary lay underneath.

As Screwball flipped open the diary, Snips looked at Snails uncomfortably. “She’s not going to read that backwards, is she?” He stepped forward. “Um, Screwball? I could read that if you want.”

“Dear diary,” she read in a near-perfect imitation of Surprise’s ebullient tone and hurried speaking cadence. “Today I saw the creature again. I was riding an ankylosaur to the gates of Slumberland when I saw it slinking through the edge of the forest. I caught it’s face for a moment and it was a real meany-weany, total tizzie-dizzy of a stinker. It’s nasty, smart, and getting closer.”

Apple Bloom trotted into the room. “Well, the ceiling’s fixed. Did I hear Surprise ‘round here?”

“It’s staying around Butterfly Hill,” Screwball continued. “I think it’s planning something. I need to invest all up in his gate. I don’t like this.”

Apple Bloom shivered, gently pawing at Snails' shoulder. "Tell her to stop doing that voice," she whispered. "It's... not right."

Screwy closed the book, slipping it into her saddlebags. Turning to her shocked new friends, she stared with haunted eyes.

At an outside table of Horte Cuisine’s Café Ditzy Doo-Smith and Lyra Heartstrings broke out into giggles as Cheerilee raised a glass of cider. “True story.”

Ditzy reached across the table with her wingtips for the flower vase appetizers as Lyra egged Cheerilee on. “And then, ‘Lee? Where’d it go from there?”

Cheerilee grinned. She leaned back, hearing the sound of rain on the café table umbrella. The rest of the café’s customers had headed inside, but they had promised the waiter a heavy tip to keep serving them outside. “The three of us never knew when to come out of the rain,” Lyra had explained.

At the moment Lyra was grinning knowingly at Cheerilee. Cheerilee swallowed her tea and breathed in. “Well, we were alone, in the middle of the steamy Outback, soaked to the skin, so… Ditzy, how did John propose to you?”

Ditzy nearly spit up her drink at the sudden change of subject. “John proposed at a diamond waterfall. I mean, there were diamonds involved. And waterfalls. Kinda.”

Cheerilee and Lyra exchanged amused grins. “How romantic,” Lyra said. “I always worried that you married a wet blanket. I saw the way you looked at him, but how much adventure is in the heart of a guy who putters around in a blue shed in the backyard?”

“Lyra," Cheerilee said as she reached for a plate of batter-fried sunflowers. "I’m so happy for you and Bon-Bon. How did you propose?”

Lyra sat up on her seat, drawing pained looks from her friends as they contemplated what the unicorn’s backbone looked like after years of her antics. “Bon-Bon… proposed to me.”

Cheerilee giggled as Ditzy shook her head. “I call horse apples,” Ditzy said as she crossed her forelimbs.

Cheerilee downed her cider in one gulp. “Miss Doo-Smith, rarely have I heard you use such language.”

"Okay," Lyra said with a sigh. "One order of dark shame, coming up." She rested her head on her hooves. “She convinced the cops not to arrest me.”

“We were at a club for our fourth anniversary. I had just beat this raging plothole into the ground after he grabbed my flank. I was dizzy from a punch and Bon-Bon was holding me upright. The fuzz were just about to slap the cuffs on me when she screamed at them.” Lyra grinned and dropped her eyes.

“She said, ‘I swear to Celestia if you let me take this stupid, irresponsible, disorganized idiot home tonight I will marry her and make an honest mare of her.’” Lyra played with her empty mug. “I don’t know if they were deeply touched or just terrified of her.”

Cheerilee reached over and placed a hoof over Lyra’s. “I’m… I’m so glad for the two of you.”

They both turned at the sound of Ditzy’s crying. Cheerilee steadied her with a hoof as Lyra passed her a napkin.

“It’s just…,” Ditzy choked as she tried to speak. “I’m always glad to see you two happy. Things could have been so much worse.”

Ditzy cleared her throat. “I mean, I always thought so,” she quickly said as she looked into her cider.

Ditzy nodded. “I guess the three of us have someone… I mean, somepony looking over us.”

As Cheerilee and Lyra picked up their conversation, Ditzy smiled to herself. “I just wish he’d do the dishes sometimes,” she whispered.

While the three mares rejoiced, a bedraggled purple mare joined them at the table. Cheerilee hooked a forelimb around her daughter. “Ladies, you remember my pride and joy.”

As Lyra winked at Screwy, Ditzy through her a sympathetic look. “Screwball, how are you holding up?”

Cheerilee nodded and dug a hoofful of bits out of her saddlebags. “Girls, I’ll be around town for a while. Let me get Screwy home.”

Lyra nodded and returned to her plate while something ran around inside Ditzy's head. Ditzy fixated on Screwball with a troubled look. She opened her mouth, letting it hang open for a moment before closing it. Staring into her drink, Ditzy whispered, “Be strong, Screwball.”

“Hey, Ditzy,” Cheerilee said. “Would you want to bring Dinky and Sparkler over tomorrow? The girls always have fun together.”

Ditzy bit her lip. “John and I are taking the girls out of town for a while.”

Screwball took her mother’s saddlebags as Cheerilee stood up. Cheerilee looked at Lyra wistfully. “Ly-Ly, I’m so…” She sighed.

The two mare’s let the touch of each other’s warmth linger while Screwball watched the rain fall.

Screwball fell onto her grandparents' guest bed, exhausted. She stared at the ceiling as Red stuck his head through the doorway.

“Screwy?” Red stepped carefully past the threshold. “Screwy, are you alright?”

Red caught his breath. He walked over and kisses her cheek. “I have to go play nice with the in-laws. And if they don’t play nice tomorrow, I’ll bury them in the Everfree Forest.”

Screwy snickered as Red left the room. She waited until she heard the sound of the door-latch close, then pulled Surprise’s diary out of her saddlebags. Carefully lighting a candle, Screwball turned to the first page.

Dear Screwball,
Hello! It’s going to be so great being your friend. I have no idea how I’m going to be your friend, since you don’t exist yet. That’s really weird, but one day when you will you’ll explain it to me! I know people usually write personally to their diaries, but I also know that you’ll be the first person to read it. I hope you asked for permission, because otherwise I’ll be mad at you!

Screwball closed the diary and stared at the ceiling. After a few seconds she continued reading.

Dear Screwy,
Today I met an awesome teacher at the college library! There was this statue and it had a fork but it was really a trident and my new teacher told me that! She’s training at the school at my mom’s school. Does that sentence work? I don’t know. I’ll ask her. I think she’s going to be your mother. Her name’s Cheerilee.

Screwball shivered as she read ahead. The candle burned low as Screwball blinked bleary eyes over the writing. Peering at the scrambling lines, she got out of bed to get a snack. She pushed open her door and walked onto the landing. Downstairs was the living room, containing the pool table, sculptures, and exotic plants that years of her grandparents' dedication had paid for. She crept down the stairs quietly as she heard her family’s voices.

“That’s right,” Cheerilee said. “She’s getting a little broken down. Her eyes don’t work, and then there’s that talking backwards thing.”

“Don’t forget that bloody nose nonsense, dear. I swear, we should have done this ages ago.”

Screwball could have sworn that was Red’s voice. She stuck her face through the side of the staircase railing and looked down. Her family was gathered around a large box on the living room floor. Packing tape and labels lay scattered about, bearing the logo of “Dr. Ocsid’s Acme Adolescents.”

Cheerilee grunted as she pulled an immobile pink pony limb out of the box. “We got a discount on the new model since the last daughter they gave us was so dysfunctional.”

Red’s voice echoed inside the box as he searched inside. “Yep. Got all the protocols fixed, took away the emotional insecurity. Even managed to keep all the good bits.” He pulled out of the box with a torso in his hooves. “Whichever those were.”

Screwball turned away and vomited onto the steps. When she looked back, Cheerilee had stuck the limb she held onto the torso. It affixed with a sucking sound and started moving. She then placed a head onto the torso’s shoulders, where it immediately twitched into life.

“Hello, parent!” The pinkish girl flashed her stunning blue eyes and grinned. “It’s so wonderful to be a fully-functional part of your family.”

Petal brought in a tray of tea and placed it onto the table. “You should have replaced her years ago, Little Flower. After all, it’s not like she’s a real pony.” As one, Screwball’s family turned to stare at her with self-satisfied smiles.

The unfinished pony gasped in shock. “Please dispose of the previous child to avoid voiding contract.”

“This… is real.” Screwball backed up the stairs. “Me am seeing all of this.”

She squeaked as she bumped into something. Turning around brought her face-to-face with a smiling draconequus dressed in clown clothes. Each claw held a stick of cotton candy.

Discord grinned at his captive audience. “A proper daughter is given a place. An imitation just takes up space. No birthday clowns for a mocked-up freak. She’ll be thrown out within the week.”

As the smiling face leaned in Screwball flung her hooves over her face. The railing gave way behind her, and she flailed her hooves to grab onto something as she tumbled into nothing.

Screwball continued to scream as Cheerilee shook her awake. She turned to see her parents’ fearful eyes in the glare of the morning sun.

“Screwball, wake up!” Cheerilee continued to shake her as Red held a flashlight in his mouth and shined light into Screwball’s eyes. “Please wake up!”

Cheerilee stopped shaking Screwball. “Oh, dearie.” She pulled her daughter into a hug. “You are my child, no matter what anypony says.” She pushed her face into Screwy’s coat to conceal her tears.

Red sat down next to the bed and ruffled his daughter’s mane. “Oh, Screwy. Who said that you weren’t real?”

“It wasn't Discord. Mom, Dad, Discord isn't coming for the children of Ponyville. He’s not in our dreams.”

Red stood behind his wife and brought her close. Cheerilee shook her tearful head. “That’s impossible, Sweetheart. That’s impossible because Mommy’s friend’s dealt with him. Discord can’t hurt you or anyone, dear. He won't be coming after you because Mommy’s friends hunted him down and turned him to stone.”

Screwball nodded and looked away. She ruffled her hoof underneath her blanket and pulled out a rainbow-colored paper cone with cotton candy on top.

Rarity steadied herself with one hoof as she flung back the champagne glass in one gulp. “And she never came home! Twilight, why wouldn’t she have come home?”

Inside the Ponyville library, Twilight Sparkle listened in silence as she took in this information. “Rarity, there’s doubtlessly a good explanation. I’m worried about Spike, but we have to keep calm. I mean, I don’t want to worry you… ”

“Worry me!” Rarity’s horn flashed as the glass shattered against the wall. “I want you to worry me,” she declared in a husky voice that dropped all pretense of propriety. “Give me something concrete to worry about rather than these nameless fears.”

Twilight looked away as Rarity heaved. The silence was broken as Cheerilee stormed through the door of the library and screamed.

A Nightmare in Ponyville

by Paleo Prints

Chapter 3: Blood Red Sandman