The pine needles crunched underhoof as I walked over to the foldable chair. When I found the plastic thing to be too small and misshapen for my use, I instead replaced it with a large, comfy couch.
‘Much better.’
I groaned as I practically melted onto its surface. In front of me, a small campfire was the sole source of light in the patch of coniferous woods I was in. Above me, a large breeze was shaking the trees. I sat there for a while, listening to the crack of the fire and rustle of the branches. I closed my eyes and pretended I was where I was dreaming of.
The sound of more pine needles crunching behind me growing increasingly loud alerted me to the presence of the only one who could be here in my dream.
“A couch? In the woods?”
“It’s much comfier than what’s traditionally out here.”
“We cannot argue with that logic.”
I sat up and made room as she walked around from behind me. Stopping for a moment to glance at the fire, she hopped up and took a seat next to me.
Warmth of the fire. Nice seating. The smell of woodsmoke. The rustling of the branches, crackling of the fire, and distant chirping of crickets. This was a lot calmer and nicer than what my usual senses were often subject to on Equus.
“Are thee alright?”
“What?”
Luna was staring at me with a concerned look on her face. I could see the orange and red fire reflected in her teal eyes.
“Thou look sad.”
“... Just replaying some memories in my mind. I shouldn’t, Panar knows I’ve got plenty to be sad about nowadays. There’s no need to add more to the pile.”
“What were thou thinking of?”
“The last time I was here. I was with– nevermind.”
“Are these woods in thy kingdom?”
“Nothing there but dirt, rock, and an oppressive sun.”
“When were thou here in these woods?”
“Years ago… Ahem. How was your day, Luna?”
“Thou were–”
“I’m fine.”
Luna moved on, thankfully.
“... ‘Twas as usual. This morn We heard petitioners before the crown, all begging for aid. Then We dined with Twilight, the Bearer of Magic. Then, We dueled with Daybreaker in a battle of wits. We would have lost, but thankfully she did not realize that we were dueling. Or that We were set against her in the first place. A tricky thing, that. How does one defeat thy ruler without them knowing of thy disloyalty?”
“Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. You’re going to want allies. Close friends. Preferably the kind that doesn’t backstab you and get you and your friends killed.”
“That is a subject We were hoping thou could instruct us in.”
I sighed and slumped over the arm of the couch.
“‘Fraid I’m no use there. I was doing pretty good, up till everyone died.”
“Tell us what went wrong.”
“One of my closest friends. I trusted him– we trust him. We all did. You think you know a guy, then BAM! You’re ordering your friends to their death all because one of them… one of them…”
I put a hoof against my face, rubbing my eyes.
“Phasma–”
“I don’t know how Tarsus justified what he did. I don’t know if he even saw us as friends to begin with. All I know is that he got my fr– no, I got my friends killed. It was naive of me to think that there wouldn’t be traitors. I should have seen that coming– it was so obvious in hindsight– but I didn’t plan for it, and every ling who put their lives in my hooves, I… threw them into the fire.”
I watched the flames dance atop the burning pile of logs.
“... We will try not to do that then.”
I snorted.
“Yeah. You do that.”
“We… We cannot offer thee any words that will sooth thy pain. We imagine if Celestia were here, she would know exactly what to say. She would know the pain thou suffers from, having survived our own betrayal. Yet she is not, only us. All We can say is that it gets easier to ignore the pain. Be with company when you can. Learn from thy mistakes and try to not make them again. Fail, and try again. Never give up hope.”
I stared at her. Luna was not looking at me, instead she was looking up at the starry night sky. So far from civilization, it was visible in this night sky.
“Thanks Luna. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to unload all of this–”
She reached over and grabbed one of my hooves and looked me in the eyes.
“Never apologize for such a thing. Bottling everything up is what We did so long ago. We will always listen to thy troubles. That is a lesson we learned in blood…”
“Then I suppose all the advice I can give you is be careful who you trust. Anyone might be wearing a false face, even before you meet them.”
“We will keep thy advice close to heart.”
Now she looked over to me.
“These are not our stars. Where are we?”
“... Close to home. Closer than anywhere else you’ve seen.”
“We know the shape of our canvas, no matter the angle it is viewed from. We know these stars were not shaped by our horn.”
“Like I said, close to home…”
She tilted her head. It reminded me of a dog.
“Thy kingdom is south of Equestria. We would know what our night sky would look like. Ah, thou had said this is not in thy kingdom. Thou hail from outside it? Where would thy place of birth be, where the night sky is so… alien?”
It took me a moment to recover from the slight shock of her accidentally getting it right.
“... I don’t want to talk about this.”
Luna frowned.
‘It brings up memories I’ve been trying my damndest to suppress. Making this dream was nothing short of a mistake.’
Silence once more fell upon us, broken only by the ambience of our scenery. Luna thankfully had dropped the subject and moved on.
“Phasma, there is something thou might help us with yet.”
“What is that?”
“Our subjects are too frightful to approach us. We are finally spoken to and acknowledged, but We are not… wanted. We are feared. We are a strange stranger in a time of upheaval. Our ponies most certainly are longing for familiarity, but We cannot provide it. They will take the aid I offer, but many are… Hesitant.”
“And?”
“And We would like to hear how We could be more approachable.”
“How you could be more approachable?” I echoed and tapped my chin. “Hmm. Alright, let’s say I’m one of your ponies. Clop clop clop, I walk up and bow before you on your throne. What is the first thing you say to me?”
She let go of my hoof and puffed her chest out. I stared at her hoof for a moment as she composed herself.
“... Speak! What is thy–”
“Stop stop stop stop! Alright. I can already see some problems. First off, there’s no need to be so… loud. If you want to be approachable you should start with not screaming at the poor soul.”
“Ahem. Speak! Why is thy reason for petitioning the crown?”
“Hmm. You’re starting the conversation with an aggressive question. Try not calling to attention that your subjects, your ponies, are seeking help from you. Perhaps instead, try greeting them like you would a stranger– a stranger of equal social status– on the street.”
“That has never happened before.”
“Uh… You want to appear as if you are personally listening to this person’s troubles… Alright, repeat after me: Good evening. How may the crown aid you today?”
‘Never thought working in retail would help me– or a fellow ruler I’m giving advice to– rule a kingdom, yet here we are.’
“Good evening. How may the crown aid thee today?”
“Eh. Drop the thee’s and thou’s and thy’s. And the Royal We, while you’re at it.”
“Beg thy pardon?”
“Beg your pardon. I said use the singular pronouns I, me, and my when talking about yourself, and the modern you and your when talking to someone else directly.”
“We see– I see. Tho– you are very articulate, Phasma.”
“Thanks Luna, I try. Just keep practicing it. Now, where were we? Oh right, the very beginning. Start again. Actually, let’s start with asking the name of your subject first. That’s better than sounding like you’re from Customer Service.”
Our lessons continued on through the night till I had to wake up. The lessons ended with a promise that I would teach her what tricks I knew of when it came to clandestine operations and with her filling me in on what she’s done so far.
Another dawn, another day of slowly siphoning off real food from the oblivious ponies around me. Two things of note happened the day after I started educating Luna on modern linguistics and manners. One, the guards came back, true to their word. Two, I took a shower.
I was sitting in my bed, bored as usual, when the trio of protectors entered my room.
“Good afternoon Far Sky.”
“Good afternoon Search, Bray, and Dew.”
Sergeant Search smiled. He seemed to do that often.
“Have you thought about our offer?”
“... As long as I don’t have to call you sir.”
‘That’s a point of concession I can make later. Make it seem like I’m actually bonding with them.’
“You won’t be required to, so that’s a yes?”
“Yeah. I mean, it’s a yes.”
The happiness that radiated out was so tempting to nibble on.
“Glad to hear it! I’ve got the papers here, and we’ll pick them up tomorrow once you’ve signed them. Giving you a chance to read ‘em through, you see.”
“Right.”
“Then once you’re discharged we’ll set you up in the barracks. Staying in it isn’t mandatory, but given that you don’t have a place to stay in town…”
“I appreciate the gesture.”
“These two here’ll teach you what you need to know about being a guard. Hmmm. That should be all. Once you give us the signed papers then I’ll let the staff know that you should be discharged into our care. In the meantime, read up and rest up.”
“I will. Thank you, Search.”
After they left, the day dragged on as slow as usual. Eventually, after dinner, Nurse Gentle Hoof told me that it was time to clean up. Given that he had taken away the tray that I used for dinner, I was confused at first. He then brought over the wheelchair once more and led me to the bathroom.
“I’m sorry we didn’t get to do this yesterday, Far Sky. I’m afraid it slipped my mind after we finished the final part of the physical exam.”
That final part wasn’t physical at all, but instead an examination of my horn and magical capabilities. Of course, I hid how much I was able to channel at a time, but it was nice to know that there was no problem there.
“What did you forget?” I asked as he pushed me into the bathroom.
“I’m afraid you smell. Rather horribly, I might add. The last time you washed was when you were thrown into the river.”
‘Actually one of the only times I was cleaned via water in this life.’
I sniffed but didn’t smell anything.
“... I’ll take your word for it. Why do we need to go to the bathroom to do a cleaning spell?”
“Cleaning spell? How… That’s not a substitute for bathing, Far Sky. Not at all. Did you bathe frequently prior to the woods incident?”
“... No?”
He started muttering behind me and he stopped my chair in the small-ish room.
“I’ll have the doctor order a round of tests for Fur Rot or anything else you might be carrying. Though, given the complete lack of symptoms, you’ve somehow managed to avoid all that.”
“Oh. Yay?”
“Yay indeed. Alright, this stall here is a shower. I want you to sit down on your haunches when you’re using it. You’re a ways away from being able to stand. Lay down if you have to, so long as you don’t cover the drain. Use the knob there for the water. Here’s soap, shampoo, conditioner, and a towel. Any questions?”
I watched as he pointed to each item as he listed them off. I had never used any of those with this body, but I couldn’t exactly say that.
“... No.”
Thankfully, my identity was a stallion of few words. If I had issues, I can just claim it was pride about not being used to missing a hoof. Or at least, imply that. Or perhaps it was my state of poverty that led to inexperience...
“Alright. You’ve been doing a good job so far of getting in and out of the chair on your own, just be sure to completely dry off before trying to walk around. You’re going to be very unstable as it is, there’s no need to add a risk of slipping.”
With that, he walked backwards, pulling my chair to the door.
“Let’s also have you practice pushing your chair on your own, that way you can get back to your bed without me having to stick around right outside your door. Go ahead and grip the wheels with your magic and push them along.”
I did as he asked, imagining hands gripping the two wheels at my side. It was a strange thing, moving without physically doing anything, but in short work I made it across the room to where the shower stall was. Then, I spun one wheel to turn around to face Gentle Hoof.
“Great job!”
My face heated up as he smiled at me.
“You’re patronizing me,” I said quietly.
‘Getting across the room isn’t some grand achievement…’
“Oh, I’m sorry Sky. It’s just that we’re all really impressed with the progress and resilience you’ve shown so far. To think, you went from such a… hurt state, to having a job lined up and making your first steps on your own. That’s one of the quickest recoveries I’ve seen in my career yet!”
‘You can thank changeling royal healing for that. This body tries as hard as it can to not die.’
“... Thanks?” For added shyness, I looked away, specifically at the shower to my side.
“I want to stay and watch you get out of your chair on your own, just in case. Once you get into the stall, I’ll head out. If anything happens, just yell. I’ll keep your room’s main door open so we can hear if you call out.”
I slowly rose from the wheelchair and limped into the shower. Given that I already had a lot of practice walking on three hooves, I had to hide just how easy it was. The sluggishness was not faked, as I was still quite tired all the time.
“Okay, I think I’m good.”
“Wonderful. I’ll check on you later tonight to give you your final antibiotic pills for the evening.”
“That sounds fine. Thank you, Nurse Gentle Hoof.”
I heard hoofsteps and the door close. Using my magic, I folded the wheelchair and leaned it against the far wall. Then, I looked up at the shower head. It was strange, having it so far above me rather than only barely above my head when I was human.
‘So this is what it’s like to be short… I prefer being tall.’
I pulled the knob out to start the shower and flinched when cold water hit me in the face. Turning my head and the knob, I spat out water and wanted for the frigid shower to warm up. Eventually, it warmed up and I leaned into the spray, letting it soak my fur coat. The large nozzle quickly drenched me in water that was progressively getting hotter.
I groaned and let my forehoof slowly slip from underneath me, laying down as Gentle suggested.
‘Panar, that feels good. I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this good. Showers. Need to bring showers to the hive.’
I lay my head next to my hoof.
‘The hive… Am I even going back? There’s nothing there but a defendable position. And an access to the Underhive, whatever that’s worth. None of my friends will be there. Coxa got out, who knows where he is. Thorax is still missing. Oestridae and Lacewing are… are... Oh damn it all. I’m trying to relax here!’
With that in mind, I focused on the sound of the water hitting my splayed-back ears as I lay on the shower floor.
“Far Sky?”
A loud knocking on the door startled me awake. I could taste a bit of fear nearby.
“You alright in there?”
“Huh? Whuzzat?”
“I asked if you’re okay? You’ve been in there for a while,” Gentle Hoof called from outside the door. He was calling out over the sound of the water which was still running. It had gone lukewarm, so I must have dozed off. The fear must have been Nurse Gentle Hoof being concerned for me.
“Yeah. I think I fell asleep.”
Gentle Hoof seemed to have calmed down when I answered him.
“Alright. Are you finished?”
“No, I still have to actually clean up.”
“Please make it quick, you’ve been in there for a long time.”
A sense of happiness– amusement, no doubt– faded away as Gentle Hoof left. I sighed and picked up the soap.
‘Now, how the hell do I clean a fur coat?’
Some time later, I managed to get myself cleaned, dried off, and back into the wheelchair. Then, I slowly made my way back to my bed. Once I got out of the chair and in my bed, I folded it back up and leaned it against the wall next to the machines.
Nurse Gentle Hoof came in shortly after, carrying a cup with a couple of pills in it.
“You made it out in one piece!”
“I’ve learned that losing limbs is to be avoided.”
“Oh, no I didn’t mean–”
“Heh. It’s okay, it was a good joke. Even if you didn’t mean to make it.”
“I, uh, thanks. At any rate, you should be good to move to the facilities on your own.”
‘Thank Panar for small miracles.’
“When do you think I’ll be ready to leave?”
“You’ll have to ask Doctor Hoarse Throat about that. It could be anywhere from a few days to up to a few weeks. It depends on how well accustomed you become to the physical therapy, given that you need to adjust to three legs.”
“Right…”
“Don’t worry, your future is looking brighter and brighter… Are you feeling okay?”
“Yeah?”
“Your eyes are very red. Were you–”
“I’m fine,” I said too hastily.
He gave me the pills, a glass of water, and a sad smile.
“You’re through the worst of it, Sky.”
“It sure seems that way.”
‘But with the way it has been going so far, I’ve got a lot of work left to do.’
“If you need anypony to talk to, I’m always available.”
“Thanks for the offer, Gentle,” I said plainly.