A request by Ether Echoes:
Cloud Chaser asks Rainbow Dash out on a date, but must first battle her seven evil siblings, including her unicorn sister. Rainbow Dash secretly helps out because this is bullshit, but it would hurt her siblings' feelings if she was open about it.
The pegasi can be a very traditional tribe. Not because of any natural inclination, but rather, geographic isolation. Cloudsdale is almost literally a world apart from the rest of Equestria, and a pegasus could easily go their whole childhood, or even most of their lives, without ever meeting a member of either ground tribe face to face. It promotes a certain insularity, a sort of small-town incestuiousness.
That said, it is important not to exaggerate. For instance, some unicorn authors like to portray pegasus ritual as occurring in stark amphitheaters, with burning braziers and toga-clad crowds howling for blood. These stories are both anachronistic and, frankly, somewhat tribalist. Yes, many pegasus customs do require open spaces, but they aren’t primitive, just a little traditional. A ground pony might not be familiar with their customs, but they would appear quite modern.
Cloud Chaser was born of two earth ponies, and raised on the ground, so Rainbow Dash’s family endeavored to be understanding. They knew she would not necessarily be familiar with Cloudsdale’s customs, and wanted her to feel at ease.
So they had a little family gathering, with hayburgers and pie, where she could meet all the ponies who would be attempting to beat her senseless for her presumption, to bloody her for daring to touch their beautiful flower of a sister.
“This is Radar Assist,” Rainbow said, introducing her eldest brother first. His cutie mark was a radar dish and a zeppelin, and he fought with deadly energy beams he could project from his wings.
“Rope Burn,” she went down the line. Her older sister wore a stetson hat and carried a lasso, a provlicity she picked up in her youth from her earth pony boyfriend, who had since become her earth pony husband. “Be careful,” Rainbow said. “There’s a magic weight on the end of that rope that she can make heavy as an anvil. If she gets a lasso around any part of your body she can drop you right out of the sky.”
“Uh…” Cloud Chaser said, which she felt was fair, under the circumstances.
“Reverse Charge,” Rainbow pointed at the brother who was but a year older than her, who had a slight frame, and wore glasses and a pocket protector. “He’s an accountant at a credit card company.”
“Oh!” Cloud Chaser held a hoof to her chest and laughed. “So, there’s at least one easy one? Or uh,” she attempted a smile, “do you audit me to death?”
“No no,” Reverse Charge laughed. “I’m definitely going to be the easiest fight. I don’t even have a gimmick or a special move. I just use knives.”
“What?”
“Knives,” he said, picking up the plastic knife that rested on his hayburger plate, and sending it flying into the sky with a flick of his head.
Cloud Chaser stared at him. A moment later, a dead seagull fell past them, a little plastic knife having impaled it beak to feathers.
“Anyway,” Rainbow Dash sighed. “Finally, we have the little kid of the family. Cloud Chaser, meet Rise Early.”
Rise Early was a unicorn mare, perhaps fifteen years of age, still in that lanky phase where her limbs were too long for her body and her horn too short for her face. Her coat wasn’t blue, and her mane wasn’t colorful, and of course, she had to wear special magic horseshoes so she could sit on clouds with the rest of the family.
“Before you ask,” Rise Early said, “yes, I’m adopted. And no, it doesn’t matter. My family’s the best.”
“Darn right it is,” Reverse Charge said, ruffling Rise Early’s mane.
“Oh, well…” Cloud Chaser laughed. “She’s a kid. I can’t punch a child. Or, sorry, a teenager. But still.”
“I know. It’s okay,” Rise Early said. “I’m a necromancer. Get it, ‘rise’ early? You can fight my undead minions. I’ve got some skelletal pegasai, some zombies, and your mother’s ghost.”
Slowly, haltingly, Cloud Chaser swallowed. “My mother isn’t dead.”
“Oh. Well then, I’ve got some mare’s ghost who has unresolved issues with her daughter ‘Cloud Chaser.’ But I guess it’s a different Cloud Chaser. Just to check, your mother has a red coat?”
“Green coat.”
“Yeah, different Cloud Chaser then. Darn.”
“Uh…” Cloud Chaser stumbled several times as she tried to get to her hooves. Only on the third attempt did she manage it, and thereafter utter a shaky, “Rainbow, can I speak to you in private, for a second?”
The two flew away to a nearby cloud, and once there, Rainbow embraced her. “Sorry,” she said at once. “I know my family is way too intense about their traditions. But it means a lot to them. And I know it’s stupid—”
“It’s not stupid, Rainbow!” Cloud Chaser hissed. “It’s psychotic. They’re saying I can’t date you unless I kung-fu fight all of your siblings.”
“I know,” Rainbow sighed.
“It’s violent. It’s savage. But more than that,” she pointed at the cloud below them, “it’s controlling. It’s saying they have to approve anypony you go on a date with.”
“I know. I know. It—”
“Think about it,” Cloud Chaser pointed back at the family gathering. “If Rise Early met a nice colt and wanted to get lunch with him, should that colt have to fight you, one of the Elements of Harmony, before he could smile at her? That’s messed up!”
“That’s not fair,” Rainbow fumed. “I’d go easy on him. And they’re going to go easy on you.”
“Go easy?” Cloud Chaser frowned. “Like, it’s just a play fight?”
“Yeah, exactly.”
“Oh.” Her brow furrowed. “Sorry, I thought this was a real fight.”
“A real fight? No.” Rainbow laughed. “That would be crazy.”
Awkwardly, Cloud Chaser laughed. “So it’s like, ritualized? Like, if Rise Early brought home a colt, you’d just play-punch his shoulder.”
“I’d Flying Dragon Kick his shoulder.”
After a long pause, Cloud Chaser said, “Wouldn’t that… break his bones?”
“Only if he didn’t get out of the way,” Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Come on, the Flying Dragon Kick has like, a huge leadup time. It’s one of those wuxia martial arts moves that looks really cool, but isn’t practical in a fight. He’d have a full half-second to get out of the way. Any pegasus who can’t dodge a kick with a full half-second lead time doesn’t deserve to be dating my little sister.”
Cloud Chaser stared. Into the silence, Rainbow muttered. “Besides, I was really hoping she’d find a pony who knows the Iron Bones Technique? I mean, like an earth pony. She’s about Apple Bloom’s age.”
“Okay, you know what?” Cloud Chaser said. “I’m out. From this day forwards, I’m only dating earth ponies. At least their traditions make sense.”
“Didn’t your parents and the apple family once have a pie-eating contest to the death?”
“It was to first blood!”