Muffin Time

by DrJohnSmith

Dinner time

It was a normal spring day in Ponyville. The birds were chirping. The flowers were flowering and Derpy was causing a commotion at the post office. A light gray pegasus with a blonde mane stared at her boss with her crossed eyes as he laid into her over messing up. Again. “Derpy, you ditz! This is the fourteenth time today you’ve screwed up someponies packages! And it's only Monday!” The mustachioed stallion yelled and yelled as Derpy only sunk back in her chair. “If you weren’t my niece I woulda fired you long ago. Now GET OUTTA MY OFFICE!” He yelled, practically pushing her out of his office and slammed the door behind her. The wall eyed mare walked solemnly to the counter before shaking off the negative feelings she had welling up. She quickly swallowed them as she heard the familiar chime of the door open. The familiar trotting of a little filly. A pale, litish gray violet filly with a grayish gold mane trotted up in excitement. The little unicorn filly used her developing magic to levitate a piece of paper in her mouth up to the counter.

“Mommy! Mommy! Miss. Cheerilee said we get to visit the Crystal Empire for a field trip next month! Can you sign my permission slip?” Dinky Doo said with glee. The pegasus giggled as she grabbed a pen with her mouth and quickly signed it. “Thank you mommy!”

Derpy nodded. Dinky stopped her bouncing for a moment and noticed her mothers body language. “Mommy, are you okay?” Derpy nodded silently. The filly wasn’t convinced and turned away. “Oh okay. I’ll see you at home!” and she trotted out. The filly knew she had to rush back to school to turn in her slip, but she knew she couldn’t. She had to talk to someone. Her mother’s best friend. Dr. Hooves. 

The filly raced through town to a familiar house with bits of experiments strewn about the lawn. The stallion in question was digging through a cart filled with broken machine parts and busted clocks. Time Turner was Ponyville’s resident clocksmith and inventor. His passion for science landed him the nickname Dr. Hooves. A rare occurrence when he’s ever referred to as Time Turner. Dinky hopped into the cart in an attempt to be noticed. “Where is it? Where is that thromdibulator!” He tossed bits of tech left and right, and even a sink until he finally noticed Dinky. The filly exclaimed a small “Boo!” to give him a fright. Doc exclaiming “Gah!” and falling back into the ground with a hoof over his heart. 

The filly giggled and giggled. “Got ya, Doc!” ‘Doc’ Derpy’s nickname for Dr. Hooves. The stallion gave a sigh of relief to see the unicorn.

“Dinky Doo! Now what do I owe the pleasure? Mother wants some of my special ‘Derpy Double Shift Muffins’? Ooh! Or does she require my special-” Doc was cut off by the filly whistling. 

“Doc, mommy was acting weird today.” Dinky began. She told him about her visit to the post office. “I wanted to get my permission slip signed so I went to see mommy at work only wasn’t acting like herself! So I thought “If mommy is acting weird there’s only one pony to go to!” the only pony who's spent time with mommy more than she has with herself!” She pointed her forehoof at the amber stallion “You!” The filly was cute but she could match Pinkie in who could talk the longest. Doc, doing what he could do, stuffed a muffin in her mouth. The young filly happily munching while Doc pondered for a minute. 

Derpy feeling down? What could have gotten to her? And WHY would little Dinky’s first thought be to seek my assistance? I must get to the bottom of this.

Doc motioned for Dinky to follow him. The young filly happily trotting alongside the stallion. “So, are we gonna go help momma?” 

The stallion nodded, “Eventually, young Dinky. But first, I believe you have a permission slip to return to Cheerilee.” He stated with a smile. The filly gave a bashful smile as the two headed to the school house.

The bushy mustachioed postmaster looked at his employee with a gaze of stone. The stallion looking at her performance of the day. “Well, you didn’t screw up much since this morning so I guess I can let you off the hook, kid.”

Derpy squeed with delight as she flew into him for a hug. “Oh thank you, Uncle Postmen! Thank you thank you thank you!” Postmen groaned as he pried Derpy off him. 

“Okay kid!” She managed to pry her away and send her and himself flying into stacks of mail “Don’t push it.” Derpy gave an embarrassed smile and flew off. Smashing into the door. “You forgot to open it. AGAIN!” She gave another embarrassed chuckle and zipped out.

She made a quick stop to Sugarcube Corner to pick up some muffins. Mrs. Cake and Pinkie greeting the mare with warm smiles. “Hiya Derpy! How’s the mail business? Oooooo I bet it’s sooooooooo fun! Meeting all sorts of interesting ponies all day and-” The hyper pink pony felt a cupcake shoved into her mouth by the elder pony.

“Good afternoon, Derpy. Same as usual?” Mrs. Cake asked. The pegasus nodded.

“Could you throw in some chocolate chips and- OOOOOH! Some scones! Incase Doc decides to come over.” The wall eyed mare explained. Pinkie and Mrs. Cake shot each other a look and the pink pony zipped off to fill the order. 

“Offly close to Dr. Hooves, aren’t you?” Mrs. Cake remarked. 

Derpy nodded. “Oh of course! He likes to keep me company after, during and sometimes before work. He also takes care of Dinky when I’m too busy.” Derpy took a complimentary muffin and took a big bite.

“You’re lucky to have a coltfriend like him.”

Derpy spat the contents in her mouth out in a spit take. Covering Mrs. Cake in muffin and spittle. “C-Coltfriend!? Me- him- nonononononono! He and I are just good friends!” She defended. Mr. Cake wasn’t convinced.

“But you two spend so much time together, and-”

“I assure you, Mrs. C. Doc and I aren’t together.” 

Mrs. Cake shot her a sly, knowing grin. “If you two aren’t together, then why have you been blushing this whole time?”

Derpy was lost for words. She didn’t have feelings for Doc. Did she? It wasn’t long until Pinkie returned with the bundle of muffins. Derpy paid the cake her bits with an exasperated sigh but kept her smile and dashed out. Mrs. Cake and Pinky looked at each other and then the door before Pinkie asking “What the hay was what about?”

Derpy trotted down the road with muffins happily in hoof. The wall eyed mare couldn’t help but think back to what Mrs. Cake had said. Doc? My coltfriend? Sure we do everything together, but- No! Derpy you stop that! He’s your friend. Her mind battled on like that for a while. It wasn’t long until Derpy reached her house. A grounded house. Given her daughter was a unicorn she felt the need to have a home close to the ground but it made more sense for her, to. It was a quaint little cottage with a mailbox that had familiar bubbles painted on it. It wasn’t always the two of them —her and Dinky— she used to be a married mare. A marriage she’d try her best to forget. The pegasus opened her door to see an excited Dinky with Dr. Hooves. The two were fixing the old busted radio that Derpy had been meaning to get looked at for some time. “Well, who's this now?” She said with a smile. The filly jumped with glee as she ran to her mother for a hug. 

“Momma! Doc took me to school to return my permission slip!” The unicorn said with glee. 

“Yes, yes! Cheerilee asked how you were doing, as well. Oh! And,” Doc and Dinky motioned towards the radio “Totally repaired! Now you don’t have to worry about spending three months worth of bits on a new one!” Doc exclaimed. Derpy gave a chuckle as she set her basket of muffins on the table. 

“Oh my! Why, it looks so new! No wires popping out at all.” Derpy gazed at the radio with awe. Marveling Doc’s handiwork. Derpy reached behind her and pulled out only a few bits. “This is all I can afford-” Doc silenced her with a forehoof against her mouth.

“Nonsense!” He exclaimed. “This was done out of lo- friendship!” He stammered on his words. Dinky shot the stallion a knowing eye as he collected himself. “I shan’t charge you any bits for this! Since we’ve become so close have I ever charged for repairs?” Derpy gave it some thought. 

He’s right. Ever since we met he’s never charged me for repairs. Even Princess Celestia has to pay when something needs fixing. What makes me so special?

On the outside Derpy appeared to be at a loss for words. The mare ran a hoof through her daughters mane before setting off for the kitchen. “I think I best get started on dinner. You wanna stay, Doc? I’m making a stew with some fresh carrots I got from Golden Harvest.”

Dinky tapped the stallion’s forehoof. “She sets a place for you in case you decide to come over and talk about science.” She said with a smile. Doc scratched his chin as he gave it some thought. He did have a few clocks to fix and some experiments to work on, but it wouldn’t hurt to stay for a bit. As Derpy went off to the kitchen Doc decided to follow suit. “Stay, young filly. I need to discuss a matter with your mother.” With a nod from the unicorn Doc set off. 

The kitchen was small. A simple stove with a sink and counter and a pot stewing atop. Derpy chopped carrots into the pot for her patented ‘Derpy carrot stew’ for dinner. The stallion watched on as the mare chopped away at the long oranges before her. Doc took a second to clear his throat and slightly adjust his green bowtie. “Derpy, if I may, can I-” He began.

The mare jumped at his sudden speaking and nearly dropped the knife. Doc rushing up to keep her steady. A blush creeped across the wall-eyed mare’s face. Quickly turning to hide it from the scientific stallion. After setting the knife of the counter and setting Derpy back up right, Doc finally asked his question. “Derpy, what has you down?”

“Wh-wha! I don’t know what you’re talking about, Doc!” The mare stammered for a bit. She knew he saw through her. He always has.

“Dinky was telling me that you seemed a bit down at work.”

“I wasn’t down! I was just-”

“Derpy Doo you tell me what has you so upset this instant!” He shouted. Doc never raised his voice. The only times either of the fillys heard the stallion raise his voice was during parent teacher conferences whenever Cheerilee would say Dinky is slipping in her studies. It took a lot to upset Doc, and his friend being upset and not telling him upset him the most. 

Derpy took a deep sigh before looking in his eyes. Or, as much as she could with her eyes being the way they were. The mare placed her forehooves on her bowtie to adjust it. Doc knew this was a ploy to delay her story. Shooting her a look, the pegasus began. “The morning started off pretty bad when I messed up some deliveries.”

“A few missed orders? That’s normal for any mailmare.”

“Not when it isn’t even lunch yet!” She shouted. He could tell this hurt her. Tears were welling in her eyes. “I don’t know, but I just… I was off my game. It was one mistake after another. Rarity’s fabric got shipped out to Canterlot instead of Manehatton, The Cake’s shipment of special Yakyakistanian icing arrived at Sweet Apple Acres, your hourglass never arrived,” she plunged into a hug as she wrapped her forehooves around his neck as she cried into his shoulder. “It was a total disaster!” She said between sobs. Doc did his best to comfort the mare but could tell it was something more. Between more sobs phrases like ‘I’m a failure’ and ‘I’m a useless cross eyed moron’ In the corner of his eye he spotted a frightened Dinky peeking around the corner. Doc felt at a loss. All he could do was hug back. Running a hoof through her mane as he calmed her. The last words she set made Doc’s anger boil. 

“Ace was right.”

He lifted her chin with a hoof so he could see her eyes. Her eyes; a sea of golden yellow. His heart skipped a beat as he stared into her. “You are not a failure! You may be a little absent minded at times, but a failure you are not!” He pulled her into a more intimate hug. “Derpy Ditzy Doo, you are not a failure!” He felt heated. The sound of her ex-husband’s name made him even more so. The two parted from their hug as they turned to see a cheering Dinky. Both fell flush as they tried to collect themselves. Derpy cleared her throat as Doc and Dinky scattered to set the table. It wasn’t long until Derpy came out with her carrot stew. The trio enjoyed their dinner as Dinky talked about school and her excitement for the field trip to the Crystal Empire. Doc talked about how he’s perfecting his time travel chair to be more than just a chair with no actual time travel abilities. As he did, Dinky noticed how enamored her mother was with his talking. Neither understood a lick of what he was saying but they were happy. At the end of the night Doc read the filly a bedtime story.

“And there he was; in the midst of The Time Master’s evil, Royal Pin knew he had one thing to do.” Doc rambled. Dinky was just into his story as he was. A tale about a unicorn who can time travel. 

“What happens next? I need to know, Doc!” The unicorn filly said in excitement. 

“Now that will have to wait for another day.” He said as he turned off her lights. Derpy came in and gave a goodnight kiss to her daughter and tucked her in. 

In the hall Derpy smiled the brightest smile Doc had ever seen. “Thank you for today. You didn’t have to take her to school or even help with dinner, but-”

“Nonsense Derpy! It was my pleasure. At this point Cheerilee expects me to accompany the filly. And she is such a joy to have around the lab!” The two shared a giggle before Derpy gave him a tight hug. 

“I mean it Doc, thank you.” The two touched noses for a second. Their faces flush with a crimson red.

“I-I-I-I-I believe I should be heading back to my lab!”

“Oh no! You can stay here for the night.”

“Another night on your couch, eh? You do have a remarkably comfy-” 

Doc was cut off by a gray forehoof shoved up against his mouth. “No no, I-” She swallowed her words. “I was thinking maybe you could… sleep in my bed. Just for tonight!” Doc fell flush at her offer. He took a hard gulp as he tugged at his collar. The pegasus wrapped her hooves around his barrel and nuzzled her head against him. The two shared some yawns and Derpy was out like a light. She wasn’t awake to feel a tender kiss upon her head as Doc drifted off to sleep.