//------------------------------// // Unconventional Family Trees // Story: Unconventional Family Trees // by Joseph Raszagal //------------------------------// Unconventional Family Trees A pony story by Joseph Raszagal As inspired by sleep deprivation, cheap vodka, and apple juice ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Applejack's tongue burned with an oaken flavor as she knocked back yet another shot. The whiskey hit her stomach with an unheard splash and sent a brief wave of heat throughout her body. A belch escaped her, followed by another stagger into the wall behind her. It had been supporting her for the past 15 minutes. “Heh, Ah wonder what Rarity woulda thought 'bout that?” she smirked as she reached across her living room table for the nearby bottle. “Not like it matters. Tonight certainly ain't a night to pretend Ah'm all prissy an' ladylike.” A loud slam pulled the farmer's attention away from pouring her next drink. Standing in the doorway, soaking wet from a rainy gallop, was a lavender unicorn with sharply narrowed eyes. Visibly livid, Twilight stepped inside and asked in an icy tone, “Then what is tonight a night for?” With a sigh, Applejack placed her glass back down on the table. “Ah'm surprised, Twi. Mah money was on Dash. When it comes to bustin' chops, few bust 'em better than yer rival.” A swift hoof across the mouth left the workhorse momentarily speechless. “What in Celestia's name do you think you're doing, Applejack?” shouted Twilight. “Gettin' drunk outta mah mind. What's it to ya?” Another slap. Applejack stumbled backwards, shocked, and winced as she rubbed her stinging cheek. “What's it to me?” Twilight snapped, seemingly only seconds away from bursting into angry flames. “Do you know how long I've been looking for you? Do you know how worried I've been?” The librarian's added emphasis stabbed the farmer hard in the heart. However, it was her red and puffy eyes and the dark streaks running down from them that delivered the killing blow. “She's been cryin',” Applejack thought to herself in shame. “She's been cryin'... over me.” Taking care not to stumble, having already downed two mugs of hard cider and six shots, Applejack made her way over to Twilight and nuzzled her cheek. The unicorn tensed for a brief moment, rigid from all of the stress and anxiety she had incurred over the past two hours, but several seconds later found her leaning against the drunken mare for support. No longer fueled by her righteous indignation, Twilight sunk to her knees. It seemed weariness outweighed furiousness. “Ah reckon Ah deserved those swats,” Applejack said with a tired smile. With fresh tears welling up in her eyes, Twilight took a deep breath to steady herself and asked, “Why did you rush off like that? You know how dangerous the Everfree Forest is, Applejack, especially during a storm as big as this one. We were already safe in Zecora's hut when it started and she was more than happy to offer us a place to stay for the night.” Applejack's face contorted slightly at the mention of the zebra's name. Moments later it contorted even worse when she realized just what she was thinking. A new wave of shame hit her like a tsunami, eroding the sandy banks of her conscious. Zecora didn't do anything to deserve her ire and the cowpony knew it. “Ah'm sorry, Twi, Ah just... needed to get outta there,” she sighed as she turned to face her whiskey again. It beckoned to her with tantalizing promises of numbness. She resisted. “Ya know how broken up Ah was when Granny Smith died?” inquired Applejack, her voice hollow. Nodding, Twilight replied, “Of course. She was your grandmother. I can only begin to imagine how much she meant to you.” “Well, Ah'm sure ya remember what Ah did after the funeral.” “...Exactly what you're doing right now.” The farmer closed her eyes and shook her head solemnly. “When Ah saw Apple Bloom earn her Cutie Mark today, Ah was sure Ah'd see an apple of some kind there.” Twilight's eyes widened in understanding. “But Ah reckon a chemist's cauldron is about the furthest thing from an apple, eh? Sure can't grow 'em on trees.” A somber silence settled over the room as Applejack poured herself another glass of whiskey, her earlier resistance finally proving futile. “Losin' Granny was hard enough, Twi,” said the orange mare after a long drink. “Ah don't know what Ah'll do if Ah lose mah sister too.” Levitating the glass away from her fretting friend, Twilight smiled gently and chided, “Applejack, you don't seriously think that just because Apple Bloom's found her calling that she's going to abandon you, do you?” “Ah dunno what to tell ya... It'd be a lie if Ah tried to argue otherwise. Ah just feel like Ah'm losin' mah family, one by one, an' Ah don't know what to do about it.” Wrapping her forelegs around the hurting mare and pulling her into a tight embrace, Twilight softly assured, “You have it all wrong, Applejack. You're not losing your sister, you're gaining a new one.” Hugging back, the workhorse buried her face in Twilight's mane and began to cry as a fresh wave of shame hammered into her heart's shoreline. Picturing the zebra in her mind, Applejack begged forgiveness for the awful things that she had been thinking. “Ah've seen the way Zecora looks an' acts when Apple Bloom's 'round. The way her eyes light up an' the spring that she gets in her step. It's like watchin' a mother finally get the chance to teach an' care fer the foal she's never had. She's smart, she's kind, she's saved our bacon with her potions an' brews more times than Ah can remember, an' Nightmare Night proved to the whole dern town just how great she is with kids.” Knowing better than to interrupt, Twilight simply stroked the cowpony's blonde mane as her apologetic ranting steadily dissolved into wracking sobs. Having finally laid herself bare, Applejack let it all out. Several minutes ticked by, the only sound in the entire house the drunken mare's frustrated and exhausted weeping. “Apple Bloom never got to know her Ma an' Pa,” Applejack stated, switching topics, as she squeezed Twilight one last time before backing away. To say that the farmer looked “composed” would be to lie in the name of Honesty itself, a truly interesting form of irony. However, beneath the chipped and cracked facade she found herself feeling oddly rejuvenated. A good cry, it seemed, had been long overdue. The bottle beckoned a third time. Its calls went unanswered. “Ma died giving birth an' Pa... Pa just wasn't the same after she died. He wanted to be around fer us, Ah know he did, but he just couldn't find it in him to take care of himself without her 'round to get on his case 'bout it. Pneumonia took him a year later. Ah can still remember how he looked in his bed those last couple of minutes before he went. Ah'm sure he felt terrible 'bout leavin' us, but that smile; he was shufflin' off to be with his love again. As much as Ah tried, and believe me when Ah say Ah tried hard, Ah couldn't ever fault him fer that. Ah just couldn't.” Nodding, Twilight sadly mused, “Love and hate are funny things sometimes.” “Heh, ain't that the truth,” Applejack concurred. “Ah hated him for leavin'. Ah still do sometimes. But... well, Ah dunno. Begrudgin' somepony, especially mah Pa, just ain't in me. Ah'll always love him more than Ah could ever hate him. Ah just wish he coulda stayed strong an' kept soldierin' on long enough to get to know his newest daughter. She deserves so much more than what she got, Twi, she really does.” Placing a hoof under the apple farmer's chin, Twilight tugged lightly until they locked eyes. “Then let her have more, Applejack. Step aside and let her both pursue her talent and strengthen her bond with her teacher. It's as easy as that.” Applejack staggered backwards and fell on her rump, her mouth hanging open as it dawned on her. “Teacher,” she echoed, her voice but a whisper. In an instant, the earth pony realized just how deeply personal the advice that was being offered to her truly was. “She must be like a second mother to ya,” Applejack managed, a bit overwhelmed. Bashfully, Twilight turned away to hide her blush and replied, “Yes.” It was Applejack's turn to wrap her friend in her forelegs this time, hugging the unicorn tightly. “Thanks, Twilight,” she said, nuzzling her, “Ah get it now. Ah know what Ah have to do.” With a hopeful smile, the purple mare inquired, “Which is?” No longer tormented over the thought of losing her sister, Applejack found the answer to be the most obvious thing in Equestria. “Ask Zecora if she'd do this family the honor of bein' Apple Bloom's godmother.” Proud beyond words, the librarian tackled her friend to the ground and hugged her yet again. They remained embraced for a while, free of their stress at last, until Twilight face-hoofed seemingly at random. Confused, Applejack prepared to question why the purple pony had struck herself, but fell silent as Twilight stood up and stared intently at the bottle still sitting on the living room table. “Ah don't reckon Ah'd keep drinkin' on my own tonight,” the farmer supplied, “but Ah s'pose if'n ya'd like to join me, well, Ah think Ah can handle a few more.” “Well, there's certainly no way we'll be able to make it back to Zecora's in this weather, especially with you as deep into that bottle as you already are. The girls will be worried, of course, but it looks like that's just going to have to be a bridge for us to cross in the morning.” “Got'cha,” said the farmer with a nod, smiling genuinely for the first time in hours. “Ah'll go get another glass.” Rolling her eyes, Twilight giggled, “Just don't let me have too much. You remember how crazy I can get.” Popping her head around the corner from the kitchen, Applejack smirked, “Ah'd use the word frisky, actually. An' yeah, Ah'm countin' on it.”