As the sun rises up and bathes the logging camp in its light, 1988 fights off a bout of headache caused by all other changelings waking up. Being one of the lowest-ranked infiltrators of the hive, he knows full well that he wasn’t made to ever be in this position, and his brain is struggling to function as the main hive mind node for all the other changelings around.
The stress of what happened last night can’t be helping.
***
The ponies recovered from the arrival of the changelings rather quickly, and the medical staff immediately took Uproot away.
9013 and 8622, the two warriors whom 156 and 387 tasked to lead as many of the drones as possible away from the fight, reported what they knew, which unfortunately was little to nothing.
Supposedly, the main group was attacked by creatures similar to what little 1988 remembered seeing, but managed to repel the enemies.
“We couldn’t harm them,” reported 8622, “156 tried blasting them with lasers, we tried hoof-to-hoof but that was like punching soft rocks. We didn’t break anything on impact but they weren’t affected at all. We grabbed rocks, nothing. Sticks, nothing. Fire, nothing. Acid, nothing. The only thing that worked for a few moments was slowing them with our goo.”
“How did you fight them off then?” asked 1988.
“We didn’t, they just vanished. A few moments later, 387 returned, scorched and beaten up, saying he fought something big,” she lowered her voice so that none of the onlooking ponies could hear him, “He said it looked like that pony princess the queen fought in Canterlot but that it definitely wasn’t her. The weird part, though, was that according to him 31214 was able to hurt it.”
“A drone hurt it where a high-ranked warrior couldn’t? That’s nonsense,” 1988 shook his head.
“It isn’t. When they attacked again at night, I saw it for myself.”
“What happened?”
“387 set up a patrol schedule and made each warrior or infiltrator grab a drone with them. Nothing happened for a good chunk of the night until a patrol noticed 387 tossing and turning. When they went to check up on him, they noticed a black… rift hanging in the air above and something like a mantis leg sticking out of it. So the drone flew up and punched it off.”
“Huh...”
“Exactly. Whatever the thing was, it screamed. A bunch of other rifts opened around the camp and those weird changelings with worms crawling through their carapace just started pouring out. We were completely overwhelmed, so 156 ordered a retreat. 31214, though, jumped into the fray to save 387 who just lay there as one of the things grabbed him and dragged him through the rift. A few other drones got really mad and punched their way after it. Unfortunately, that left 156 as well as the other infiltrators and higher warriors unable to do anything other than slow the flood of monsters. Last thing I remember before we turned tails, threw away any semblance of organized retreat, and ran was 156’s link vanishing. I ordered everyone to grab a cocoon if they could reach one and explored the route back. The monsters stopped chasing us shortly after. I am ready for my punishment now,” 8622 lowers her head.
1988 closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and said:
“Set up a patrol schedule for this camp, use drones other than 9999. I’ll show you around. With the love we don’t have, we can’t afford to be using mental abilities. 387 figured out something before everyone else and I intend to use it.”
Thankfully, with Hacksmith’s description of unconscious Uproot’s state being similar to 1988’s, Sawtooth believed that the changelings weren’t the culprits and accepted the increased security.
***
“What to do? What to do?” 1988 mutters to himself, “Ponies on one side, monsters on the other, lack of love bearing down on us from all sides.”
He steps over drone after drone on his way to 9999 and nudges it with his foreleg.
“Hmm?” 9999 immediately sits up, yawns, and only after all that opens its eyes.
“Follow me,” whispers 1988, “Let the others sleep so that they don’t waste energy.”
They stop at the southern edge of the pony camp slowly waking up.
“I need a report from last night,” says 1988 straight up, “8622 told me things from the warrior point of view and I’m not sure what to make of it. You drones were chatting until I sent you to sleep so you might have heard something 8622 missed.”
“I doubt that, but here goes...”
***
As the assembled ponies started returning back to the living containers and 1988 was busy talking to the warriors, the drones, almost as one, charged towards 9999.
“9999, it was awesome-” 57999 blurted out.
“-they were pouring out of those floaty holes-” added 36658.
“-and the warriors were all like aaaah we can’t do this!-”
“-and then 33125 was like KAPOW!-”
“-and boom, it’s head just came off-”
“-but it exploded into big worms and 387 told us a story about some shrewd old queen who blew them all up-”
“-no, you dummy, she melted all of them-”
“-and her name was Shrew!-”
“-Shroud, 91887, keep up!-”
“-so Shroud blew them up or melted them, we’re still deciding-”
“-no one‘s deciding anything, you’re just a dummy!-”
“-I’ll show you a dummy, dummy!-”
“-I’ll end you!-”
“-not if I end you first!-”
“Focus, guys!” 9999 raised its voice, “What happened?”
“We just told you,” said 65661, walking around the two arguing drones now rolling on the ground and ineffectively biting each other, “387 told a story about some old changeling queen and it totally wasn’t disgusting and I wasn’t scared at all...” it tails off, shuddering.
“Something about worms, yes,” 9999 nodded patiently, “And then?”
“Then those weird changelings plopped out of the hanging holes and they looked exactly like those infested changelings that 387 was talking about. Like something was crawling inside their carapace, looking at us with hollow eyes, and when you punched them they just exploded into worms- hurk!” 65661 shoves a hoof into its mouth to stop itself from hurling.
“Yeah!” 13415 joined in, “But if you just closed your mouth and eyes and started swinging, they were all squishy and exploded all over the place. That sharp leg thingy was the scary part!”
“Sharp leg thingy?”
“Yup! It was hanging above the camp but when 31214 gave it a good whack all the monsters went nuts and just started dragging whoever they could back with them into the holes,” it scratched its head, “It was scary. Kinda awesome, though. We just kept punching and punching! How often do we get to punch something that doesn’t eat us afterwards, eh?”
“Doesn’t eat- you didn’t get hurt?”
“Nah, we’re all okay,” 13415 shrugs, “I’m still shaking and the things were disgusting but they just tried to grab us. They didn’t even have proper teeth, just squirming holes full of worms,” it sticks its tongue out, “If they didn’t catch you, they just nibbled on your leg or tried to throw up on you. It just kinda tickled, actually. And then you just punched them and they went splat!”
“But you couldn’t stop them from dragging half of you away...”
“Nope, too many. My forelegs still hurt from all the punching and running but it wasn’t much harder than digging a tunnel all day. They were much squishier than rocks. Plus we got orders to grab the cocoons and get out, so we did. We got almost all of them,” 13415 smiled with pride, “If you were with us, we woulda totally kicked their butts and then 156 would be so impressed that we would ALL GET THE HIGH SCORE!”
“Definitely,” 9999 returned the smile and looked around, “Good job, everyone.”
“Thanks!” said every single drone. Even the two on the ground stopped grappling each other to give him a hoof up. Of course, the peace couldn’t last long…
“Blew them up!”
“MELTED THEM!”
“BLEW. THEM. UP.”
“MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELTEEEEEEEEEEED!”
“YOU WILL NOT BESMIRCH MY HONOR, SIR! TO THE DEATH! EN GARDE!”
“STOP MAKING UP WORDS! AU LAIT!”
And they kept going.
“I’m betting 3 orange leaves on 87461.”
“Hah, 2 twigs on 91887!”
“Who’s in charge of the pool?”
“I’ll do it,” shrugged 54331, “I only have this really flat rock anyway.”
“Bet the flat rock and I’m adding my own bendy twine!”
“You’re on! With two twigs, flat rock, and a twine, I’ll have my own sling and ammo! BE AFRAID, 9999, I’M COMING FOR YOUR RANK! YOU’RE DOOMED!”
“Just means I have to try harder,” 9999 nodded.
“DOOOOOOOOMED!”
9999 breathed out a sigh of relief. Everything was back to normal.
***
“Hmph...” 1988 rubs his chin, “The key part is that you drones can harm them, but they can be slowed by gluing them down.”
“And they don’t want to hurt you,” adds 9999.
“That doesn’t seem right-” 1988 suddenly stops and blinks, “I need to have a chat with Uproot about what he saw. I think I have an idea.”
9999 keeps waiting for him to continue but it’s in vain.
“First, I need to check out 156’s camp in daylight with my own eyes. To be safe, I’m going to need the warriors… but I can’t take both with me… someone has to stay here as a hive mind node,” he starts pacing back and forth and mumbling to himself.
“I can come with you in case some of the monsters appear,” offers 9999.
“No, you have to stay here. The ponies are somewhat familiar with you and I don’t want to come back only to find all drones fried around a bug zapper. There’s no reason to take everyone with me either,” 1988 stops and raises his voice, “9013, go tell 8622 and whichever drone she’s on watch with to get over here.”
The warrior trots off and 1988 leans to 9999’s ear.
“What do you know about pony religion?”
“Uhhh...” 9999 hesitates, “I think you said something about pogroms yesterday?”
“Pilgrims...”
“Yeah, that.”
“Okay, quick recap - some creatures believe that there are more powerful beings or concepts which hold power over them, and they work to obey what they perceive to be their wishes.”
“Like the queen,” 9999 nods.
“Ye- no” 1988 taps his hoof on the ground. How would a drone understand the concept? “More than a queen. Like a super queen that tells even the queen how to live who in turn relays the instructions to us. And it’s invisible… and you can’t communicate with it… or rely on it… and it quite likely doesn’t really exist but you still obey the rules because they aren’t always completely bad.”
“Umm… am I stupid or does that sound stupid?”
“Definitely the latter, no contest. Well, we are here because our beliefs in the invisible, nonexistent being demand we walk around Equestria and stop in some places we deem important and perform activities that have no real meaning but we think they do and that they will reward us at some point.”
“Aaand they won’t?”
“Not in any direct sense, no. At least unless you don’t believe in and obey something that can directly affect your life, like the queen.”
“Like if I’m a bad drone, she can send me to the crusher.”
“Exactly that. But that’s not what we’re pretending here. We’re going with the second option, the invisible and impossible to understand option because no one can disprove that one with logic or facts and that way we can do whatever nonsense we can as long as we say it’s our faith… and as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone.”
“Okay…?” says 9999, not entirely certain it’s getting the hang of it.
“Look, it’s easy. You know I told them we need to spend time in the north part of the camp. The real reason is so that we can keep an eye on anyone coming in with news about the invasion of Canterlot. I need you to make sure it looks like we’re doing some stupid ritual for a long time there while I’m away, that’s all. I have to leave 9013 here or you’d all forget how to talk again and I want to have 8622 with me for safety. Speaking of which...”
“No sign of enemies or the ponies attempting to spy on us during my watch, 1988,” incoming 8622 salutes.
“Good,” he raises his voice again, “Everyone, listen!”
All heads in the clearing turn towards him as one, ears perked and eyes open.
“I’ll be taking 8622 and several drones to examine the place where 156’s camp was. 9013 will stay here as a basic repository of hive knowledge. For a warrior of his rank, it will be extremely taxing, so don’t bother him. 9999 will be in charge. Listen to it, it knows our current situation, and whatever it says is as if I myself said it. Got it?”
He wasn’t expecting the number of stunned gasps coming from all the drones including 9999.
“Hide the cocoons, obey 9999, don’t mess up. That’s all,” he points at several drones at random, “You’re coming with us. 8622, let’s go.”
***
The drones stare in shocked silence as the small group leaves. 9013 lies down in the center of the clearing, closes his eyes, and begins fighting the incoming pressure in the back of his skull.
As soon as 1988’s group is out of sight, all remaining drones stand up as one and charge towards 9999 who can only say a surprised-
“Wha-?”
-before it’s grabbed by a bunch of hooves and tossed into the air.
“HIGH SCORE! HIGH SCORE! HIGH SCORE!” they start chanting, catching 9999 and throwing it upwards over and over.
“I am faaaar from the high score, guys,” laughs 9999, “Let’s not go cra- OW! You didn’t have to let me drop, though.”
It finds itself surrounded by the remaining drones.
36658 spits out a piece of bark, and asks:
“Does anyone even remember the high score?”
“I heard it was something around 9 thousand...” says its bark-eating follower 57999.
“-more like 8 thousand-”
“-definitely 8 or 9-”
“-it was one hundred percent a number!” adds 54331 helpfully.
“Anyway!” 36658 raises its voice, “It’s definitely a 4-digit thing, right?”
Everyone nods.
“Buuuut, and hear me out here, have you ever even heard of a drone who was in charge of a warrior, hmmm?” 36658 wiggles its eyebrows at everyone meaningfully.
Slowly, realization dawns on the faces of everyone and they exchange absolutely astonished glances.
“That’s even better than a high score! That’s the highest score!” cheers 33125, “That’s so high, it might even...” it lowers its voice into a conspiratory whisper, “...deserve a name!”
“Guys, if literally any non-drone finds out, I’m gonna be lucky if I make it to the crusher,” 9999 shakes its head, raising its forelegs defensively.
“Then it has to be a name they won’t expect!” continues the whispering.
“That’s it!” 33125 smiles victoriously from ear to ear, “I got it.”
“I’m so eaten...” sighs 9999.
“The name will be...” 33125 pauses for effect, “High Score! That way no high ranks will ever know what we’re talking about but we will!”
“Wh-” 9999 blinks. It blinks again. It wants to object but… but that isn’t the worst idea, actually. Plus, even it has to admit, when has a hive drone ever had a real name?
“If you all agree then,” 9999 waits for them all to nod and glances at seemingly sleeping 9013 in the back,”then I accept. Thanks, guys.”
I mean, a name is a LOT but still, it’s not as if any high ranks will really care enough to figure out what’s going on.
Right?
Yeah, it’ll be okay.
***
In the late afternoon, 1988 returns, leading the group.
First check - the cocoons are untouched, 9013 is sleeping and he can feel the warrior’s hive link with no trouble.
Second check - there’s no chaos, ponies aren’t running away on sight or throwing anything.
It seems that 9999 didn’t go crazy with power and everything is absolutely fine.
At least until the drone in question rounds the corner from the office building wearing a… coronet made of twigs with a flat rock fastened to it with twine and carrying a switched off bug zapper on its back, followed by a procession of all the other drones marching in lock step behind it.
“Uh, hi,” 9999 smiles nervously, “I sensed you were coming back and I’m happy to report that everything’s fine.”
1988 nods.
“I must admit I’m a bit surprised that nothing and no one is on fire.”
36658 steps up from the small squad of drones, pouting.
“As if High Score the Shiny-bringer would ever make a mistake like that!”
“All hail the Shiny-bringer!” the drones behind it kneel, bow, and chant in perfect unison, “The hole-iest of drones!”
1988’s jaw drops.
9999 gets a brief flash of impending doom in comparison to which a thousand crushers would be a blessing.
“I, um, tried to explain your whole religion idea to them… and it may… OR MAY NOT have gotten a little out of hoof...”
“...” 1988 and 8622 silently exchange glances.
“I’m dead, aren’t I?”