//------------------------------// // The Penn-peror's New Groove // Story: The Multiverse in a Nutshell // by Pennington Inkwell //------------------------------// "We're not going." "WHAT?" "I said we're not going." Penn's voice was flat and emotionless. He seemed to be staring into empty space, unwilling to look either of them in the eyes. His hands were clasped in front of him, but he couldn't hide their shaking. Sunset wanted to be angry with him, but... something about the way he clearly wasn't existing in the moment made her heart ache with pity. Even after time, more adventures, even after coming back from the dead and being possessed by a literal demon, he was still terrified of going back to Remnant. "But their whole world's in danger!" Missy cried, flying up to him until their faces were inches apart. "Millions of lives are on the line! Including Rainbow Dash!" "Dash will make it out. We can circle back for her later." Penn didn't even seem to register Missy's presence, continuing to speak in the same monotone and stare at the same point in space. If he weren't speaking and responding to them, Sunset would have thought he had become catatonic. "And you're just going to let everyone else DIE?" Missy floated back, eyes wide and brimming with tears. "Ruby? Pyrrha?" "We can't do anything about it. There's no stopping what's going to happen, even if we had Isis and our team was at full strength." He shook his head, and Sunset couldn't see a shred of hope in his eyes. "You can't fight a typhoon, you can't hold back an earthquake, and you can't get between Baalchion and Chirac." "But-" Missy started to reach out to him, but Sunset grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back. "Give him space..." Sunset whispered. Rather than trying to draw his gaze, Sunset stepped forward and dropped to one knee to put herself directly into his line of sight. "Penn, this isn't about not wanting to go back to Remnant?" "Of course it is. I never want to see that place again." Penn continued his monotone, and in spite of her efforts to meet his gaze, Sunset could tell his eyes were still unfocused and probably not even registering what was in front of him. "But you just said that it was because we can't get between... whatever their names were." "That's right." Sunset moved a little closer, placing her hand on his knee to try and draw him out of his own thoughts. "Is it both?" "It's whichever one we're not talking about." I know this. He's being obfuscating on purpose again... He doesn't want to talk. He's probably only responding at all because the shock has him on autopilot. From behind her, Sunset heard Missy clear her throat. "Penn... have you been taking your meds?" Penn gave a near-imperceptible shake of his head. "Body chemistry's all wrong. I've been toughing it out until I can get Isis to synthesize something ink-based." Missy took a deep breath. "Sunset? A word?" Sunset was tempted not to go. She had her magic. She could get every answer she needed and spare Penn the pain of this back-and-forth session of questions and answers. It wasn't as if it would be the first time she'd used her magic on him, and she was sure she could make a solid enough case for him to forgive her later, but... "Not me. Never. Me. If we're going to be friends, I don't want you in my head." There was a difference between pulling someone out of a coma and reading their mind to get answers they didn't want to give. "Y-Yeah, sure, Missy." The two of them stepped out of the room, leaving Penn by himself again. The last thing Sunset caught before he was out of sight was the stark white of his knuckles from how hard he was gripping his own hands. Missy had a serious look on her face once the two of them were out of earshot, and Sunset could tell that this wasn't going to be one of those times she peppered references to candy and Halloween into her conversation. "You know I was part of Penn's card collection for a couple years before he gave my deck to you, right?" "Yeah?" "I spent a while as a figment of his imagination, trying to push through from my world to his long before you broke down the walls..." She sighed and looked upwards at the ceiling. "I've seen him like this before. Do you know how he got my card?" Sunset shook her head. "When he flunked out of college, he jumped into the game to try and distract himself from how broken he felt. He was buying packs with every bit of spare cash he had." Missy shook her head. "If it wasn't for Big Sis telling me why he was so upset, I probably would have just taken him for another sad grown-up, rather than someone who'd just seen their dreams shattered right in front of them." Since the topic had come up, Sunset took the opportunity to ask something that had been nagging at her for what felt like eons. "Penn's smart. How did he flunk out? I thought you said it was before your time?" Missy rubbed uncomfortably at the back of her head. "This. He refused to admit his depression was getting the better of him. Sis said that, for months, he only left his room to go to card tournaments and to eat. He got stuck in a mental rut, one that took months of work for us to help him pull himself out of." Sunset felt a chill run through her soul as she remembered the crushing black sea she'd nearly drowned in when she'd wandered off in his mind. She'd dismissed it at the time as some kind of nightmare because she'd been more focused on pulling him out of his coma, but... All that weight... is that what he's feeling right now? "Have you ever seen a computer break? Like, really badly?" Missy asked. "Blue screen and everything?" Sunset nodded. "Yeah, Sci-Twi's caused more than her fair share of blue screens of death over the years." "And to fix it, you have to boot it up in 'Safe Mode?'" Sunset looked back in the direction of the room they'd left him in. "You're saying he's in some kind of Safe Mode because he's depressed?" Missy took a deep breath. "It's hard to explain. Spirits can see this kind of thing better, but we can't really put it into words." "No, that... kinda makes sense." Sunset motioned to the table, which was still covered in food. "It's not buying booster packs, but now that I know what to look for, this REEKS of obsessively distracting himself. He could have fed ten people with half this much." Missy nodded. "If I had to guess, he's only thinking about keeping us alive. Maybe he DOES hate Remnant, maybe he IS scared of whatever's going on out there, but... I think he's hiding behind those excuses because he doesn't want to put our lives in any more danger. He can't handle this on top of being off of his medication and whatever it is the ink demon did to him." Sunset flinched slightly. Ever since they'd realized he couldn't touch base with his faith any more, Penn had refused to talk about the changes that had happened to him. He'd just been... disturbingly pragmatic about the situation, saying that as long as he could still do things like drive and fight, there wasn't any reason to worry. Sunset had wanted to run some tests of her own, but without Isis being there to provide her with equipment, the whole situation had been set aside. I should have tried to force him to talk about it. First the doubles scenario, and now this. That would be enough to leave anyone feeling like they have a tenuous grip on their humanity... "Well, we can't get him medication or figure out what happened to him without Isis. What pulled him out of it before?" Missy sighed. "Among other things... he got a new job that he thought was pretty fun." "Delivering pizza?" "That's the one." Missy sighed. "If I had to guess, it's just that 'Go to this address and come back' was something simple, and it made him feel in control again once he got the hang of it." Sunset frowned. "Control isn't really something we keep in ample supply, Missy. We all just kinda go with the flow." Missy cocked an eyebrow and gave her a critical look. "YOU go with the flow, Sunset. No offense, but it's almost concerning how well you've adapted to an untethered life on the road, and that's coming from someone who thinks of the law of gravity as a suggestion!" Sunset opened her mouth, but there wasn't any witty response waiting to jump out. She knew that laying down roots in Remnant the way that she had was a mistake and she'd been fairly called out for it, but she'd never thought that she might have overcorrected for it. "Routines like exercise and regular meals can be important for mental health, and we struggle to get both of those from inside the car." Missy sighed. "And then whatever's happening in Remnant dropped another bomb on him. Honestly? The cards for this combo have been laid for a while." Sunset took a moment to consider all of this new information. "You're right. Now that you point it out, it seems kind of obvious. So much for being the Element of Empathy... Thanks, Missy. Sometimes I forget you've got a more mature side to you." Missy smiled and gave a shrug. "One of the most important things about spooking people is being able to avoid crossing the wrong lines. You learn to read people." She reached over to the table and grabbed a fresh roll to bite into. "AND I think I've got an idea about how to get Penn back to feeling like himself!" Sunset smiled and picked up a roll of her own. "What a coincidence, so do I!"" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- If Penn had been near-catatonic in the castle, he was even worse once they were on the road again. Without Isis, they'd been reduced back to the library of music covered by Penn's CDs and whatever was on the radio, but that hardly seemed to matter. Penn didn't even bother turning on the radio at all that day. It was almost two hours of driving in complete silence before Missy gathered up the courage to speak up and ask for music. At that point, Penn had turned on the radio... without picking a station. It had taken another half hour of driving listening to static before either of them managed to reach over and change it, themselves. Penn without music? This IS bad. Times like this, I REALLY wish I had my journal so I could talk to Princess Twilight... As they approached another city, Sunset kept her eyes wide open and watchful for one sign in particular. "Appears that this city has crossed space with some kind of medieval high fantasy..." Penn muttered as he glanced out the window. "I see elves, dwarves, fauns... and some of these buildings are being converted into taverns." Sunset resisted the urge to take in the sights, she was searching for a different prize. Once she caught the glowing red sign in her sights, she grabbed hold of Penn's shoulder and pointed directly at it, forcing him to follow her gaze. "THERE! That's where I want to go!" Penn squinted slightly to see into the distance, then sighed. "Sure, whatever." Missy leaned up, taking her own turn to follow Sunset's gaze. Her eyes widened and she gasped with joy as she realized what it was that Sunset had planned. "PIZZA!" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Uuuuugh..." Missy groaned. "What's taking so long?" "It's the day after Thanksgiving. Nobody wants to cook." Penn muttered from his spot in the corner of the booth. "This is always a busy day." "Half the city's probably ordering out..." Sunset sighed as she glimpsed Penn's complete lack of a response. "What are we going to do?" Penn took a long, deep breath. "I'll go see if I can ask what's taking so long. It shouldn't be THAT hard to make one veggie lover's and an order of wings..." He shuffled his way out of the booth and stepped up to the front counter. The moment he was gone, Sunset let out a long sigh of disappointment. "Talk about a letdown... I thought taking Penn to a pizza place would help him feel more like himself, but now we're miserable AND hungry!" Sunset pressed her face into her hands as she resisted the urge to scream with frustration. "Hey, it was a good idea!" Missy argued. "We just picked an awful day for it..." "Was this the same kind of idea you had?" Sunset parted her fingers to stare at Missy with one eye. "No, mine's gonna require a little more setup than this! It should be ready by tonight, as long as Bastet pulls through for us!" Missy leaned back in her seat and glanced out towards the parking lot. After a few seconds, her eyes widened. "Uh, Sunset?" "Yeah?" "Did you see any other silver Oldsmobiles when we were pulling in?" Sunset thought carefully for a second. "No, why?" "Because one's leaving, and I think it's ours." "WHAT?" Sunset scrambled to get out of the booth and onto her feet in time to spy a car matching Sylvia pulling out onto the street. "Wait, that's not Sylvia... it's got one of the restaurant's toppers on it! It's just a... delivery... driver." Sunset trailed off as Missy floated up beside her. "You don't think... do you?" "No... he wouldn't, would he?" The two of them were approached by a woman dressed in the pizzeria's t-shirt and apron. Her long, pointed ears gave away her identity as an elf. "Miss? Your order's in the oven now, it should be out in a few minutes." "O-Oh! Thanks!" Sunset pointed to the front door. "Hey, uh, my friend went to check on our order a minute ago..." "Oh, yes! He said he was from another one of our locations, and he saw that we were swamped tonight! Before we could say anything, he was grabbing orders and was out the door!" The elf girl gave them a grateful smile. "Don't worry, your meals will all be on the house, plus dessert! You're real lifesavers!" Sunset and Missy glanced at each other, each of them making a silent exchange as they heard the other's thoughts. "Non-human girl in trouble? Penn is SO predictable." Delivering again. Guess he DID get that dose of normalcy... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "You know, sometimes it really sucks having a boss who doesn't, you know, sleep, eat, or anything like that." Neo nodded in agreement as her stomach gave an angry growl. "Well, at least those nerds keep going through areas where we can pick up supplies on the regular!" Torchwick smiled as the two of them stepped up to the restaurant doors. "'scuse me!" a voice called as one of the doors burst open, narrowly missing the timing to slam completely into Roman. A tower of red bags rushed past with what appeared to be a human buried somewhere behind them, making a beeline for the parking lot. "HEY! Watch where you're going!" Roman shook his cane in the delivery boy's direction, but they clearly were already long gone from his mind. With an indignant huff, he brushed off his white jacket. "Geez, THIS is why I could never work around other people..." he gave Neo a smile. "Present company excepted, of course." Neo rolled her eyes and gave a playful curtsy as she looped the handle of her umbrella around the door handle and yanked it open. Roman started to enter, only for her to hastily cut him off and walk in ahead of him. "Oh, of course. Ladies first. Where ARE my manners?" He smirked at the back of her head. "Maybe I should go FIND a lady and let her go ahead of us." Neo turned back and stuck out her tongue as the two of them stepped up to the counter. "Hello! Will you be dining in or ordering to go?" the woman behind the register asked. Roman could tell that she wasn't human, but she wasn't necessarily a faunus, either. Not that it mattered THAT much, he hated everyone equally, and anyone's money was just as good once it was in his hands. "We'll be dining in. We just got off work and we're looking to relax." Roman put on his best faux-affability. It never did any good to make the minimum-wagers angry, especially when they were handling your food. "Alright! Just come right this way and we'll get you seated!" The two of them followed the hostess as she led them to a trashy-looking booth and handed each of them a menu. "A waitress will be around to get your drink orders shortly!" Both of them nodded politely as they started to look over the options. "Ugh, these all sound like they're just various flavors of sugar syrup... Oh, they have iced tea! Sound good?" Neo nodded, then set down the menu while pointing to a picture of the pizza. "Of course we're getting pizza! You don't go to a pizza joint and NOT get the pizza!" Roman rolled his eyes and went back to his own menu. "What do you think of deep-dish?" Neo's nose wrinkled slightly in disgust. "Okay, traditional it is, because I'm NOT eating thin-crust. Pepperoni?" He glanced up to see her nodding. "Onions?" She nodded again. "And bacon?" A third nod confirmed it. Of course she wanted a tri-colored set of toppings. Still, it sounded tasty enough, so it would please them both. With a nod to commit the order to memory, he set down the menu and leaned back. "All your meals will be on the house, plus dessert! You're real lifesavers!" Roman's ears perked up at the sound of someone getting free stuff. For a brief second his mind started to wander through various cons he could run to try and get the same treatment, but they all required more setup. Oh well, dine-and-dash it is. "Pardon me! Sorry! Coming through!" a pile of now-empty red bags came rushing back through the door, accompanied by the same voice that had nearly bowled him over on their way in. "Man, they really work the drivers like animals, don't they?" Roman leaned back in his seat as he watched the delivery boy slip away into the kitchen. "Speaking of 'overworked,' though..." He looked at Neo, who was giving him a curious look. Clearly, they weren't thinking the same thing. "We've been on these kids' trail for months! It's coming up on Christmas!" Neo gave him a skeptical look, then reached up and pressed her hand against his forehead. "No, I don't want to celebrate it, but it's the principle of the thing!" Roman pushed her away with a roll of his eyes. "Think about all the heists we could have pulled in this time. Half these worlds are populated by complete chumps!" He took a moment to glance around to check for any sneakily-hidden monitoring Grimm or silver-haired witches. "Look, Salem made a great pitch at first. Of course I want revenge, who DOESN'T like revenge? But we're hardly any closer to getting that red-haired menace and her little angel than we were when we started!" --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "WHO'S ON CUT TABLE?" Penn shouted to the entire kitchen. The pizzas were piling up on the over conveyor belt, and if nobody started cutting and boxing them now, the ones behind would get stuck inside the oven and either dry out or burn. "I thought it was Oakleaf!" a four-armed cook shouted back. "You mean the faun I just saw running for the bathroom?" Penn growled as he picked up a pair of tongs in one hand and the wedge-shaped blade in the other. "Doesn't ANYBODY." With a flick of the wrist, the pizza was tossed out of the hot pan and onto the cutting board. Running on pure muscle memory, he dropped the tongs and took the blade in both hands. "REALIZE." In two seconds, he'd rocked the blade back and forth four times across the pizza. "I HAVE." He dropped the blade and reached for a cardboard box. "DELIVERIES to do?" With a single motion, he slid the now-sliced pizza into the box. Beep! Beep! Beep! went the deep-fryer behind him. He pivoted on one heel, pulling the appropriate basket out of the oil and hanging it to drip dry. "So, we're telling them to fire Oakleaf when this is all done, right?" "I'm sorely tempted..." he muttered, glancing at the screen for the details on the next order. "This one's a dine-in! Pepperoni, onion, and bacon! Where's the waitress?" "Right here!" The elf girl declared. You know it's a rough night when the manager is waiting tables... "Okay, this one's all set!" He passed the pizza off to her. "Thanks for the help, I'll get Oakleaf back as soon as I can so you can get back to deliveries!" she promised as she rushed away. "If I ducked out on rush hour without a word like that, my manager would have my head on a PIKE!" Penn called after her. With a shake of his head, he turned back to the twelve-pizza pileup. Good thing I still have the muscle memory... I can just do this without thinking. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "...my manager would have my head on a pike!" Sunset cringed as Penn's frustrated shouting made its way out of the kitchen. "Do you think everything's okay back there?" Missy nodded. "If he hashn't come to ge' ush ou of here, ish fine..." she mumbled around a mouthful of pizza. "But I didn't want him to get MORE stressed out!" Sunset started to stand up. "This was supposed to help him unwind!" Missy swallowed loudly as she floated across the table, grabbing Sunset's shoulders and pushing her back into her seat. "Just relax! It's a pressure valve going off, like a kettle whistling! He's just getting it out of his system!" Sunset cast a worried glance towards the kitchen. "He DID say that cooking calms him..." "And then he threw a hot frying pan at Alucard." Missy picked up another slice. "Just kick back and enjoy the free pizza, okay? Penn yelling is Penn letting it all out." Sunset sighed and picked up another slice. "Those chicken wings he ordered are gonna get cold." "I'm pretty sure they won't mind giving him some fresh ones." Missy rolled her eyes. "Though I'm not gonna risk eating them before he can when he's THIS fired up." Sunset nodded in agreement as she took another bite. She'd kinda ordered veggie lover's out of reflex, it was usually the go-to order when the Rainbooms were all together since it was the only thing they could all agree on. Otherwise, everybody just wound up getting their own pizza and their sleep-overs suddenly cost a small fortune. Personally, though, she wished she'd gotten something a bit heartier. "Sucks that our stop in Remnant has come back to bite us in the butt..." Missy mumbled. "As great as Team RWBY is, I kinda agreed with Penn about never wanting to see that place again. It's bad enough Salem is somewhere out there looking for us without having to go back to the place she has the home field advantage!" Sunset felt her brow furrow with frustration. "I still want to give her what's coming to her for what she did to Penn, but you're probably right. Looking for trouble usually just brings trouble." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Look, I KNOW you still hate Sunset Shimmer, I still remember that real shiner of a black eye she gave you! But don't you think this has been more trouble than it's worth?" Neo continued glaring at him as she snatched up another slice of pizza. As usual, the two of them were carefully timing the moments they took their portions to see who could manage to sneak the last slice out from under the other's nose. "Maybe so, but consider the opportunity cost we're incurring, here. If we keep chasing them, we're just letting them cost us even more in the long run." Roman sighed. "And I KNOW you feel the same way I do about how creepy our new boss is." That finally seemed to cut deep enough through Neo's grudge for her to admit he was right with a small nod. "Listen, I know getting your hands on Shimmer is important, so how about we give it one more week? If we don't get a chance to make her pay by then, we-" "...head on a PIKE!" Roman turned to glance back towards the kitchen. "Yeesh... guess the rat race isn't for everyone, huh?" Neo raised an eyebrow, then pointed to her ear. "What? You think it sounds familiar?" Neo nodded. Roman tried to concentrate on the voice, but it had already been lost again in the sea of noises in the busy restaurant. "Probably just that same guy who almost ran us over on our way in, that's all." Neo's face scrunched up in deep thought for a few seconds before she shrugged off her confusion. After another moment of consideration, she held up two fingers. "Fine, two weeks. But after that, I'm finding us a nice, stupid mark and we're getting our hands on some otherworldly cash!" Roman picked up his next piece, leaving three slices. This was where the game got interesting. "Seriously, trying to keep up with those globe-trotting kids is impossible! We're always a step behind, even with that stupid scrying spell Salem keeps using to keep tabs on them! We can't ever catch up!" Both of them watched as a half-human, half-goat creature left the restrooms, only to be confronted by another pile of delivery bags with a human buried somewhere inside. "TELL somebody next time you can't hold it! We almost lost five orders' worth of food because of that stunt, and all these deliveries were delayed because I was running your stations!" "Hey, take it easy, man!" the goat-person raised their hands in a show of surrender. "I'm sorry, okay? Take it easy!" The delivery driver huffed and rushed out the door again. Roman took a sip of his tea, trying not to make it obvious that he and everyone else had been watching the argument. That voice DOES sound familiar... --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Um, excuse me?" "Yes, ma'am?" "Well, I ordered a pepperoni and green pepper... this is a pepperoni and mushroom." Penn blinked, then looked to double-check the receipt. She was right, it was clearly listed there that she was supposed to have gotten a pepperoni and green pepper, and she was holding one with mushrooms. "Four arms and that cook still managed to screw it up!" "I'm so sorry, ma'am! I'll head straight back to the store and let them know about the mistake." He refused to let any of his seething rage escape in front of the customer. She hadn't done anything wrong, she was just asking to get what she paid for. "I'll have your corrected order back here as soon as possible!" He managed to keep his cool all the way back to the car, where there were at least five more order bags spread across the back seats. "I'm done! I'm freaking done! There's no helping these people! They're totally hopeless!" "Given they're all non-human, it makes sense they'd be new to this kind of-" "NO! You gotta draw the line somewhere!" In spite of his words, Penn was already turning back in the direction of the store with every intention of continuing to help. "You gotta make a statement! You gotta look inside yourself and say 'What am I willing to put up with today?' NOT! THIS!" He reached over to the radio and cranked the volume knob to its maximum for the next song as the synthesizers began to blast. You see the world through your cynical eyes! You're a troubled young man, I can tell! "So, we're not going back to Remnant, right? No way in hell, right?" Reason argued. "Of course not!" "Just like how you're not going to keep helping these idiots at the pizza shack?" "Ye- NO! I mean it! We're not going!" You're fooling yourself, and you don't believe it! You're kidding yourself, and you don't believe it! The song continued, as if Styx themselves were mocking him. Penn scowled and slapped the steering wheel in some kind of token attempt to punish Sylvia for judging him, wishing that would stop the nagging at the bottom of his soul. "You know that if we go, we'll die." "If we don't, Sunset and Missy will go by themselves." "Without the car, they'll never make it in time." "They'll find a way, and they'll get themselves killed without me." "That's their choice. You can't even rewrite Isis into a functional state without almost losing yourself to the ink demon, there's no way you can help them stop Chirac and Baalchion!" Penn shook his head, trying to push out the thoughts. "Look, I've got an order to fix and then five more to deliver before they get cold, okay? Let's focus on that for the moment." "You can't avoid this forever." "Did we lose the receipt? That had the address we're gonna have to go back to on it!" Reason was forcefully pushed to the back of his mind as he closed in on the restaurant's location, but the music kept playing. It felt half like a taunt, and half like Sylvia herself was trying to encourage him. Get up! Get back on your feet! You're the one they can't beat and you know it! Come on! Let's see what you got! Just take your best shot and don't blow it! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Well, guess it's time to make ourselves scarce, huh?" Roman glanced around to make sure that none of the employees were looking. Neo had managed to sneak the last slice with the help of her semblance, using it to make him think that there was an extra one left the whole time. It was absolutely cheating, which was rule number one with them: always cheat. Once Neo had nodded, affirming that her illusions were going to cover them on their way out, the two of them slipped silently back out the front door with full stomachs and a settled decision: they would give Salem two more weeks to track down Sunset Shimmer, and then they were calling it quits. HOW one called it quits with an incredibly powerful immortal, vindictive witch was something Torchwick was still working on. As they walked away, Roman caught sight of the same delivery car that boy had been piling orders into earlier sprinting back into the parking lot. He smirked and shook his head as he let the jalopy pass. He would always thank his lucky stars he hadn't wound up like THAT poor sap, constantly scrambling to make ends meet and never enjoying the finer things in life. "You know... We left the bill on purpose, but I can't help feeling like we missed something..." he took a quick inventory. Cane? Check. Hat? Check. Jacket? Check. Neo shrugged and continued walking with hardly so much as a glance back. "You're right. If I forgot, then it probably wasn't important." --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sunset leaned back with a long, satisfied sigh as she patted her stomach. "Man... who knew pizza cookies could be soooo gooooooood?" Missy sighed. "Oh yeah, ME." "I still liked the brownie better, and it was HUGE!" Sunset smiled. "Seriously, I feel kinda bad that they let us eat like this for free!" "Don't." Both of them looked up to see Penn, covered in splotches of sauce and oil, as he collapsed into the booth beside Missy. He put an extra-large container of wings on the tabletop and casually flipped off the top in a cloud of steam. "Earned every bite..." Despite his clear exhaustion, Sunset could see the faint traces of a satisfied smile on his lips. "That you did!" The elven woman from before stepped up to their table with a smile. "We really can't thank you enough for the help. Make sure you pass on our regards to our sister location, okay?" Penn nodded and gave a quick salute before beginning to pick out a sauce-soaked chicken wing from the rest. "No prob, just get your newbies whipped into shape, okay?" The woman chuckled and nodded. "Will do. Take your time finishing up, we're just going to be cleaning the kitchen for now!" A comfortable silence fell as Penn threw himself wholeheartedly into tearing apart his food. "You know... it's funny how some things never change, even when the multiverse feels like it's fallen to pieces." Sunset and Missy both blinked and glanced at each other, then at Penn. He's... talking again! "There's always at least ONE person on the staff who wants to always take it easy and doesn't come to their job to actually WORK." He rolled his eyes. "Funny how that always happens." "So... you're feeling a bit better?" Sunset asked, offering him a napkin. "Yeah, a bit. Blew off a little steam. Sorry for keeping you girls waiting, but... you know how sometimes you see somebody doing something wrong that you're good at and you just HAVE to do something about it?" "Like somebody fumbling their way through a duel and losing badly?" Missy smirked and cast a side eye at Sunset. "Hey!" "We can chill in a hotel for the night, then hit the road again, okay?" Penn sighed. "At least the card Isis gave us didn't stop working when she went offline." "Actually... I already set something up!" Missy grinned. "The perfect campground!" "Well, I won't keep us held up too much longer." Penn smiled as he ripped apart the next of his chicken wings. Using his other hand, he reached into his pocket for a pen and began scrawling on one of the napkins. Missy and Sunset both leaned over to take a peek. "Is... is that your phone number?" Missy asked. "Well, the manager IS really cute..." Penn shrugged. "Worth a shot, right?" Sunset and Missy glanced at each other, knowing that they'd just gotten the REAL reason Penn had jumped headfirst into helping this place. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Now turn left!" Penn did as he was instructed, taking them onto a small dirt road. Missy's guidance had taken them out to the far edge of the city. Now, they were past the reach of street lamps and other lights and driving purely by the light of Sylvia's headlights. As they went further down the dirt road, a structure finally came into sight, though Sunset needed a second to recognize the purpose of the massive wall in the middle of nowhere. "No way... A drive-in theater?" Penn gasped. "Missy, that's BRILLIANT!" "Thank you, thank you!" Missy stood up in her seat and bowed. "It shut down a while ago, but it should be PERFECT for what I'm thinking!" "So, what's your big idea?" Sunset asked as they rolled into the now-overgrown parking lot. Missy grinned and hopped into the third row of seats, emerging moments later holding one of Isis's repair drones. She didn't say a word as she rolled down her window and flew outside, but the clatter on the car roof made it clear she was setting it up on the roof. After a few seconds, she floated back inside. "Hit it, Bastet!" "We here at Dad's lab thank you for your continued patience whilst our facilities have been under renovation..." Penn leaned over towards Sunset. "Is that REALLY Bastet? She sounds... cheerful." "...and encourage you to keep any smart-alek remarks to yourself! I couldn't care less, but since I'm about to be able to go back to bed, I'm in a good mood! Now, without any further ado..." On the massive wall in front of them, an image flickered to life, displaying a huge set of words across the screen. INITIALIZING I.S.I.S. VERSION 112.5.1156 A picture of a cartoonishly-drawn woman with shoulder-length blonde hair and a white lab coat appeared by the words, alternating between happily posing leaning on the words, anxiously checking a clipboard, and pacing back and forth behind the loading bar. BOOTING MIRROR PROCESSORS... PARTITIONING PARALLEL INTELLIGENCE FRAGMENTATION... INTEGRATING ROSETTA DRIVES... CONNECTING TO OTHER INTEGRATED SYSTEMS... ADMINISTRATOR NOIR'S LAB: ONLINE POWER DELIVERY SYSTEM: 72% EFFICIENCY B.A.S.T.E.T. TRANSFERRING ADMINISTRATIVE PERMISSIONS... RETRIEVING ARCHIVED DATA FROM OFFLINE PERIOD... DATA ACQUIRED. BOOTING AVATAR DIGITAL ENVIRONMENT. PLEASE HOLD... A few seconds later, the entire screen lit up with an unfamiliar scene. It was a futuristic-looking laboratory, with countless experiments and machines were humming and bubbling away. Sitting at the forefront was a woman matching the cartoon mascot they'd been watching for the last minute, with the same blonde hair, lab coat, and a pink dress shirt underneath. She stared directly at the camera with bright blue eyes. "Greetings. I am the Integrated Superior Intelligence System. My apologies for the down time, it appears my systems were compromised. How may I be of assistance?" "ISIS! You're back!" Sunset couldn't contain her excitement, jumping out the door to the car to wave at the screen with both hands. "Affirmative, Sunset Shimmer." "And you look... human?" "I have been working on a digital avatar program to function as a more easily-understood user interface. Any feedback and criticism will be highly appreciated." "Looking pretty good!" Missy shot the big screen a pair of finger guns. "Love the lab coat!" "Just glad to have you back. We've been pretty lost without you." Penn smiled and sunk lower into his seat. Isis looked blankly from side to side, seeming to take in the entire field of view. "Please be aware that, due to a lack of functional cameras nearby, I cannot actually see any of you." "Oh! Sorry, Isis!" Sunset pulled her phone out of her pocket and rushed back into the car to prop it up against the windshield. "Better?" "Affirmative." "Hey, Isis, can you check the messages left from Bastet? I made a request for tonight and I'm gonna need your help to make it happen!" Isis reached down and retrieved a clipboard, beginning to flip through pages of notes. After a few pages, she came to a stop and pointed to one line in particular. "Are you referring to the request for six cases of ultraviolet ink for the purposes of 'seeing if I can turn Penn invisible?'" "AHAHAHAHA... NO, OF COURSE NOT!" Missy laughed nervously. "Gee, you must still be GLITCHING, Isis!" "Or perhaps the inquiry regarding the synthesizing of holy water for the purposes of an 'emergency squirt gun?'" "The request I made TODAY, Isis!" Missy growled, continuing to give Penn the most innocent smile she could manage to muster while everything else about her looked extremely guilty. "To bring back MOVIE NIGHT!" "Ah, yes. One moment, please, the show will begin momentarily." The screen switched to black, and everything fell silent for a moment... and then the guitar began to play. She glanced over at Penn, catching his reaction to what was something he clearly recognized. His eyes were wide with shock and he was trembling slightly. As the image of what was clearly the main characters flashed across the screen, Sunset reached over and took hold of his hand, stopping his shaking with a firm grip. "That... that's playing dirty..." Penn whimpered as the music continued. "I thought you loved this show?" Missy asked as she floated into the back seat, feigning her innocence poorly. It was some time before Sunset understood why, but as the show began to tell its story, she came to realize why Missy had chosen it. The main character was a shield-bearing hero, one who had been deeply wronged by the world he was supposed to save. Everyone, including his fellow "heroes" had turned on him and shunned him under false accusations. For a time, his only friends were a red-haired slave girl he'd bought to wield a sword for him (he was only allowed his shield, it seemed) and their magical bird that could turn into a small girl with angel wings. Was this based on our team, or something? I'm half expecting them to pick up a little know-it-all silver dragon! They sat there for hours watching the show together. Penn never called for them to stop, even as the episodes continued into the early hours of the morning. As the adventure continued, the hero came to realize his reason for fighting, even when he didn't want to save the world: for the sake of his two friends' happiness. I get it. Penn doesn't want to save Remnant, but Missy knows he cares about US, and WE care about Remnant... Sunset cast a glance to the back seat, where Missy was snoozing with a satisfied grin on her face. That IS playing dirty! Big Sis isn't scared to fight dirty! I learned from the best! Sunset heard Missy's voice in her head and the little angel's smirk widened. Sunset sighed and turned back to the show. Penn still hadn't let go of her hand, occasionally still giving it a squeeze at what seemed like random times. When Sunset looked over to him, she could often tell that he seemed to be lost in his own thoughts, but she didn't try to read his mind. At a time like this, he was entitled to his private thoughts. Eventually, when the hero was vindicated and his name was cleared, the combination of relief and the late hour caused her to finally drift off into unconsciousness. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The next thing that Sunset knew, it was morning again. The sun was shining, the air was clear... and Penn and Missy were already up, running back and forth across the grassy area in front of the giant wall. "Good morning, Sunset Shimmer." "Hey, Isis..." Sunset stretched as best she could in her seat. There was something incredibly comforting about having Isis back again. It wasn't until now that she realized that Isis being gone had felt like a crucial piece of structure in their lives was gone. "I have already plotted today's course, along with appropriate stops for meals. It has been optimized for maximum speed and minimum distance." "Huh?" Sunset blinked, still half-asleep. "But... I didn't..." "Penn and Missy informed me that we will be returning to Remnant today. Is this not correct?" Sunset looked back outside, where Missy was clearly cheering Penn on as he sprinted back and forth. "Come on! I wanna see you HUSTLE! I've seen Jiangshi move faster than that!" Sunset resisted the urge to laugh as she watched Penn running himself ragged. You know, with all the time I've been sitting in the car the last few months, I should probably join him. If not for the mental health benefits, for my physical health... She took a deep breath, drinking in the crisp morning air with a shiver. "Isis, can you send us a heater for the tent? I was going to ask Penn to buy us one, but we can't find anything that doesn't require an outlet." "Affirmative." "And Isis?" Sunset reached out and gave the drone a pat on its head. "We all REALLY missed you." "The sentiment is... appreciated."