//------------------------------// // In the Absence of elkrapS thgiliwT // Story: In the Absence of Twilight Sparkle // by MyHobby //------------------------------// Queen Chrysalis led them down several flights of stairs; rickety wooden things that had been built around what appeared to have been a quarry in its former life. Tunnels were dug out of the stone walls at regular intervals, propped up by wooden supports. Lanterns lit the way as they passed dozens of rag-adorned soldiers packing up what meager belongings they possessed. “At one time, the Diamond Dogs created the cave system on their never-ending quest for gems.” Queen Chrysalis lit her horn with a gentle green light and led them down one such tunnel. “Queen Celestia appropriated their home and sent them scattering across the continent. When she was cured of her affliction, the gemstone mines became a source of income and trade for Equestria. Especially with the dragon lands.” Edgy Spike walked on all fours to keep up with the others. “But good things don’t last around here.” “I wouldn’t go that far, Spike.” Queen Chrysalis winced, but continued on at a steady pace. “Regardless of their history, they have afforded an excellent method for travel, even when the world above is stricken with sandstorms and the roving armies of the Crystal Tyranny.” She glanced up at the low-hanging ceiling, which Princess Twilight and Celestia had to duck to move beneath. “So long as they can’t find their way down here.” “Ergo,” Shining Armor said, “collapsing the tunnels.” Little Spike glanced over his shoulder to watch the quarry recede into the distance. “And taking us further away from our way back.” Edgy Spike snorted smoke. “If you wanna singlehandedly take on the Crystal Army and a dust storm— ” “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here.” Little Spike tapped the side of his head. “I wasn’t hatched yesterday. I just wanna keep tabs on, you know, exactly how deep we are in trouble.” Edgy Spike raised an eyebrow. “Up to your ears, at least.” They left the tunnel and came out into a much larger cavern. Train tracks had been lain, and a silver cylinder with wheels sat upon them. Queen Chrysalis waved to the ponies attending the transport, who bowed at her arrival. “Thanks to the Diamond Dogs, we have tunnels all across Equestria.” Chrysalis pouted as she approached the cylinder. “Unfortunately, the tunnels are the fastest method of transportation that isn’t teleportation.” She turned around and pushed her glasses closer to her eyes. “I don’t have the magic reserves to teleport all of you, so we have but one choice.” Shining Armor glanced over the transport from stem to stern. He saw no windows, no control yokes, not so much as a lock for the door. “Is it safe?” Edgy Spike snorted as he slid the door to the side. “Not really.” “It’s not my preferred method of travel, no.” Queen Chrysalis motioned for them to board. “But it is fast, and it keeps us away from prying eyes.” Shining Armor and Little Spike gave the others a hoof up to climb aboard. With the others loaded, Shining turned back and held out a hoof for Queen Chrysalis. “You coming?” The queen took his hoof after a moment of hesitation. She stumbled and brought her face maybe a little too close to his. She muttered an apology and shuffled away. There were several seats strewn about the interior, all bolted to the floor and all containing safety harnesses that looked a little too much like reins for his liking. Twilight and Princess Twilight were using magic to help everybody into their restraints. Edgy Spike was giving Little Spike pointers of how it could be used with a dragon body, while Little Spike bemoaned a lack of custom-made harnesses. Queen Chrysalis gestured to a seat and picked up the restraints with a horn. “Please, Shining Armor. Allow me.” Shining Armor sat up with his back to the seat’s thin cushion. The harness snaked its way around his limbs and chest. “Sorry you gotta do this. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t know unicorn magic if it smacked me in the face.” “It’s no problem.” Chrysalis’ tongue poked out of the side of her mouth as she concentrated. “I understand that traveling here was a big change for you.” Shining furrowed his brow. “Have you been across the portal?” “Only once. Only long enough to see that we couldn’t get out of the cave.” Chrysalis tittered beneath her hoof. “The physiological changes were perplexing, to say the least.” “Yeah. No kidding.” Shining Armor leaned back as a strap slid over his shoulders. “I’m just glad to have a little practice with hooves, or I’d be even more useless than I already am.” Chrysalis’ eyebrows rose, but didn’t quite reach above her glasses. “You’ve been to the other Equestria, then?” “My wife took me there once.” Shining finally caught the pained expression that overtook Chrysalis every time he opened his mouth. It was subtle, but there nonetheless. “We basically just went for a walk. We’re planning on taking a family vacation, but life keeps getting in the way.” “Wife—” Queen Chrysalis cleared her throat, speaking with a light croak. “I mean… who is your wife?” “Her name’s Sunset Shimmer. She’s a unicorn from the other Equestria.” Shining gave the queen a small smirk. “Even though she’s lived longer in my world than hers by now. She slipped through the portal when she was fourteen. She considers our world her home, now.” He sighed, glancing out the door to the darkness of the tunnel system. “Lately, though, I’m starting to think she wants to go back.” “We all get homesick, from time to time.” Chrysalis offered him a sad smile. “I don’t know a Sunset Shimmer, but I do know that the way your eyes light up when you speak of her means that she is a very blessed mare.” He felt his ears lower. It was a natural movement, controlled as automatically as a smile or a shrug. It still felt strange to him. “I take it… you knew a Shining Armor?” Queen Chrysalis mirrored his drooping ears. She removed her glasses and wiped them down with a handy cloth. “Once… upon a very long time ago.” With a flash of her horn, she tightened the last of the restraints. “He was taken into slavery by Cadenza the Tyrant… I feel it might have been the first step down Dr. Twilight’s path of pain.” She clutched her cloven hoof to her heart. “I haven’t seen him since. Not for more than twenty years.” “I’m sorry.” Shining sighed through his nose. “You were close?” “Betrothed, actually…” Queen Chrysalis stifled a tear with a hoof before it could trickle down her face. “Seeing you, here and now, is actually a little freeing.” Shining Armor frowned, looking down at his strange hooves. He tapped them together for lack of anything better to do. “I’m sorry. I wish I could help you find him.” “He’s not likely to still be alive,” Chrysalis said, strapping herself down. “He was a fighter. He wouldn’t just live in slavery for two decades.” Shining nodded slowly. “I suppose not.” When Chrysalis finished clasping herself to the chair, he added. “May I ask a question about the mission?” She smiled gently. “Shoot.” “You’re a changeling, and you have changeling magic…” Chrysalis’ smile melted as the light in her eyes dimmed. “Why aren’t I disguising myself as the doctor?” Shining quirked a brow. “Aside from the fact that I’m the only possible queen of a sovereign nation?” Shining pulled back one side of his mouth. “Well, when you put it that way—” “And the fact that even if I felt right sending my subjects in, the anti-changeling wards Dr. Twilight put into place would dispel the transformation spell and reveal them to Sombra?” “That makes sense.” Shining Armor steeled his jaw and bowed at the neck. “If we’re going to send my baby sister into mortal danger, I want to understand why, Queen Chrysalis.” Queen Chrysalis’ expression flickered to a pained wince, nearly ready to burst into tears. She sealed the emotion away, replaced with a serene shadow. “Thank you for understanding, Captain Armor.” She looked over her shoulder to Edgy Spike. “Is everyone ready?” Edgy Spike shot her a mock salute. “Ready and accounted for, Your Majesty.” The Queen of the Changelings peered out the door to the waiting guards. “Caution, please send us on our way.” “Cheerio, m’lady.” The guard in question slid the door shut and called to the ponies behind the transport. “Give ’er what-for, lads!” Three earth ponies trotted up to one end of the silver cylinder. They turned until their backs faced it. Caution lifted a hoof. “Ready! Steady! Buck!” In unison, the three earth ponies bucked the transport. It shot down the tunnel like an out-of-control rail car, careening through the dark tunnels on its path across Equestria. All within held tight to their straps, a few saying silent prayers. Shining shut his eyes. He’d been in similarly tight spots before, such as his one time on a submarine (never again!) or moments before a drop into enemy territory. He just had to focus on his pulse. Keep it at a reasonable level. He didn’t have to be in control. He just had to trust the equipment and the people that maintained it. The transport jolted. The sound of metal tearing scraped at his ears. He heard Chrysalis mutter a faint “Oops.” Big Mac squeaked as he tried desperately to keep his lunch down. Shining glanced at the queen. “How long did you say this trip was?” “Um…” Queen Chrysalis’s cheeks lit up with a rosy tinge. “A few hours at most?” *** Twilight Sparkle’s legs shook as she slumped out of the transport. Every few miles, another set of earth ponies had been needed to keep their momentum from petering out. It had indeed taken several hours. By her calculations, it was already the following morning. Faster than hiking across mountains and a vast wilderness, dodging enemy soldiers and vicious storms, and still she wondered if it wasn’t worth the trade-off. “That teleport spell’s looking dang good right now.” Edgy Spike helped her to her hooves. He offered a shoulder to lean on as Shining assisted Big Mac. “First time’s always the hardest.” He blinked as her words registered in his mind. “You can teleport?” “Not exactly. I’ve been practicing.” One of her hind legs felt like jelly, while the other was all pins and needles. Perhaps she hadn’t quite tied her restraints right. “Why? Can your Twilight do it?” “No, she never got the hang of it.” His forehead wrinkled as he looked down at her, his claw gripping her foreleg lightly. “After the first few failed attempts, she decided to let it drop and focused on strengthening her other spells. Illusions and barriers and stuff like that.” Twilight pursed her lips. “She the type to give up easily?” “No.” Edgy Spike’s reply was cold; restrained, yet still holding a small bit of bite. “She’s the type to prioritize.” Twilight pushed her glasses higher up her nose and gave Princess Twilight a meaningful glance. “Yeah. That sounds more like a Twilight.” Edgy Spike’s breath hissed softly through his sharp teeth. “I’m sorry. It’s just so weird seeing y—seeing people like her after all this time. I’m just… confused.” She placed a hoof on his shoulder. She hesitated to say anything, but after a moment, she felt like she had to speak, or the moment would be lost. “It’s okay, Spike. We’re all confused. We’re all hurting. It’s just part of being… well, not human. But it’s part of being alive.” Edgy Spike raised an eyebrow. “And that’s supposed to make me feel better? Knowing that everybody else’s life sucks, too?” “No, not really.” Twilight Sparkle shuffled a few steps forward. Between the numbness in her legs and the tingling in her hooves, she was about ready to nose-dive right then and there. “But knowing that you’re not alone, that people understand you and know where you’re coming from, that can help. And even if they can’t possibly feel the same way, if you know they want to help, that’s good, too.” She took a quick glance around. Most of the others were muttering amongst themselves or out of earshot. She leaned close to Edgy Spike’s ear. “It’s okay to miss your Twilight. It’s okay to love her. That doesn’t make you a bad person.” Edgy Spike’s eyes widened. He looked at her with a gaping mouth, his lips trembling. “What? How… how did you… how did you even know?” Twilight shrugged. “I know what it’s like to miss somebody like that. To know they’re never coming back, even though you want nothing more than just that. You know it can never be the same again, but you would give anything for even just a moment.” He blinked, rubbing steaming tears from his eyes. “She has to be stopped.” “I know.” Twilight hesitated for a moment, but only a moment. She hugged Edgy Spike around the shoulders, giving him a slight squeeze. “But that doesn’t have to change the fact that you love her. Your feelings are real, Spike. They’re good.” She rested her head against his scaly shoulder. “And by stopping her, you’re helping her the only way you can.” She and Edgy Spike sat there for a moment, both leaking tears for a similar—yet not quite the same—reason. Twilight looked up at Queen Chrysalis’ approach. “They’re waiting for us at the surface,” the queen said. “We need to move quickly.” At some point, Edgy Spike had returned Twilight’s embrace. He released her quickly, standing tall on his hind legs. “Right. We have an appointment to keep.” Before Twilight could pull away, he whispered in her ear. “Thank you.” He waddled ahead before she could reply. She and the others kept up a hasty trot as they made their way up through the Southern Equestrian tunnel system. A cool breeze reached her nose, smelling of dust, but feeling much more refreshing than the hours of dark, gloomy tunnels. Cloudy skies waited as they reached the surface. A tinge of red touched the horizon where the sunrise peered into the shadows. “Sunrise.” Queen Chrysalis muttered. “Good. Princess Trixie’s still as punctual as ever.” Princess Twilight pulled a face at the mention of the name. Celestia gave her a gentle, if corrective, pat on the back. Chrysalis turned to the assembled multiversal visitors with a solemn glower. “To the northeast. Towards the mountains. Do you see it?” Twilight Sparkle eased herself around the other onlookers. She didn’t have the benefit of height that the princesses had, nor the bulk of either Shining Armor or Big Mac. With a rush of air, Mac lifted her onto his back. She let out a small squeak of surprise she was embarrassed to have made, but soon found her footing on his shoulder blades. There, in the distance, a few hours’ walk beyond the prison, was a massive castle. It was a majestic thing pulled from fairy tales; tall spires, waving flags, romantic balconies, colorful tapestries, and stained-glass windows. It was unlike anything Twilight had ever seen in real life. While Princess Twilight’s castle had been beautifully grown from magic and crystal, this had been built from the ground up by talented architects and years of hard work. It was mired in shadow. A dark pallor of swirling purple magic surrounded every parapet and archway. Deep red light shimmered from the bowels of the castle. The distant roar of a crazed beast reached her ears, and for a brief instant, she thought she saw a massive monstrous head floating around the tallest tower, hovering like a ghost. It vanished around a pinnacle and was lost to the fog of malice. Queen Chrysalis broke the castle’s bewitching spell with a sigh. “While we wait for General Care’s and Princess Trixie’s forces to arrive, I will uphold my end of the bargain. Our prison holds several of Dr. Twilight’s… close associates. They will be able to paint a clearer picture of what sort of mare she has become.” Edgy Spike pointed towards a building a few yards away. It was made of stone bricks, colored like the dust. A high wall surrounded it, topped with something akin to barbed wire. Towers stood at regular intervals, which were manned by unicorns. Shutters were in place to protect the guards in the event of a dust storm. Edgy Spike gritted his many, many dangerous teeth as he gazed upon the structure. “Ladies and gentleponies, welcome to Patience Penitentiary.” Twilight narrowed her eyes at the prison. She sat on Big Mac’s back and looked down on Edgy Spike. “‘Patience?’” “You know, like the card game you play by yourself?” “What? Like solitaire?” Little Spike scurried up and stood beside his duplicate. “We have a maximum-security prison named Solitaire. We give a deck of cards to every new arrival.” “There, see?” Edgy Spike clapped a claw on Little Spike’s shoulder. “He gets it.” “But like…” Twilight tilted her head towards the high brick walls as Mac eased her to the ground. “‘Patience?’ Isn’t that kinda condescending?” “Not if we give them a deck of cards,” Edgy Spike said. “Then it’s ironic.” A messenger trotted up to Queen Chrysalis and saluted. “Ma’am, we just received word from General Care. She and her troops are en route and expected to reach here in a half-day’s time from now.” “Thank you,” she said, dismissing him with a wave. “That gives us a few hours to play with.” They were ushered into the walls of the prison with barely a word. The guards were on a knife’s edge, shoving Twilight none-too-gently whenever she began to fall behind. Edgy Spike drew to her side and waved them off with a dirty look. He remained by her side until they reached the inner building. “Urgh.” Edgy Spike shook dust from the edges of his filmy ears. “Wish I could stay outside. I don’t wanna talk to any of them.” He lowered his head so that he could avoid looking her in the eye. “Especially Rarity.” Twilight’s ears stood up as the hair on her back did the same. She looked around the prison with a newfound morbid fascination. She began to formulate an idea of what might just lay beyond its walls. Rarity at the least, but who else? The other five? Would they share any traits with the ones she knew? “You aren’t obligated to give them the time of day, Spike.” Chrysalis spread a wing as the door opened. “The rest of you, step lightly.” Once they had all shuffled inside, one of the guards removed his face wrap. He was a pink-coated unicorn stallion with a purple mane and beard. He might have been handsome if he didn’t seem to be malnourished and unkempt. “Queen Chrysalis, we have been awaiting your arrival. Although, I’m surprised you’ve decided to grace us with your presence.” “These are strange times.” The queen turned to the princesses with a bow at the neck. “These are our esteemed guests; High Princess Celestia and Princess Twilight from the far side of the mirror.” She pointed her horn to the stallion. “This is our warden, Hammer Dulcimer. One of the most noble ponies I’ve ever met.” “Please, your majesty,” Dulcimer said, lowering his head. “I don’t believe now is the time for flattery.” “It’s not flattery if it’s true.” Chrysalis patted the top of his mane. “Please take us to see what’s left of the Mean Six. I’m sure they’ll teach our visitors more than they care to know.” Dulcimer frowned, but nodded. “For your own safety, I’m going to ask you not to cast spells while you are within these walls. We have wards everywhere to keep the prisoners from hurting others or themselves.” Twilight eased herself closer to Big Mac until her shoulder was touching his upper leg. “You get many people trying to escape?” Dulcimer turned downcast eyes towards her. He looked her up and down slowly, his eyes eventually trailing to the massive stallion beside her. “Unfortunately, with the world we live in, many see death as the most viable escape. It’s my job to show them there’s another way.” “Do not do so at the cost of your own health, Dulcimer.” Chrysalis grasped his chin and twisted his head from side to side, examining his face. “You’ve been giving away your rations again, haven’t you?” Dulcimer puffed his chest out, even as his cheeks were pressed in by her cloven hooves. “If the prisoners aren’t getting enough food, I’ve failed as their warden.” “You’ll fail as a living being if—” “Food is just as scarce outside the prison as inside.” Dulcimer took a step back, gently easing himself out of her grip. “If we’re really trying to reintegrate them into society, such as it is, we need to show that we’re dedicated.” Queen Chrysalis frowned deeply at the stallion. “Are you so certain they can ever be trusted with freedom?” “If I don’t believe that,” he replied, “what am I here for?” As he led them deeper into the prison, Twilight caught sight of Princess Twilight moving to the rear of their little procession, her face aflame with something between confusion and embarrassment. She sent the princess a questioning eyebrow, but it was summarily ignored. Princess Celestia caught up with the warden and ventured a hoof out to get his attention. “Excuse me,” the princess said, “but if I’m not mistaken, you were Prince Blueblood’s right-hoof pony the last time I was here. How did you end up as the warden?” Dulcimer offered her a shallow smirk. “Don’t worry about my buddy. He’s holding his own in the east, near the shoreline. It’s just that dependable ponies are hard to come by, so we all tend to wear a few different hats.” “I see,” she said. “So Blueblood to the east, Princess Trixie to the north, Captain Goodguy to the west…” “And Chrysalis to the south.” Dulcimer lit his horn and produced a key from beneath his wrappings. He inserted it into a heavy metal door. “The other Knights of Virtue keep mobile, to intercede whenever a threat arises. The Crystal Army, Felaccian Pirates, King Sombra, the list goes on.” He opened the door, and they entered a large room filled with tables. The mess hall, perhaps. Prisoners in rags and guards in not-much-nicer clothing milled around, most only wearing a wrap around their heads in case of dust on the wind. Several guards were positioned at the center of the room, around a table that held five colorful mares. Even at a distance, Twilight could pick Pinkie Pie out of a crowd. This Pinkie was an odd duck even compared to her human counterpart; her mane was as curly as ever, but the stone-faced expression she wore was downright grotesque. She had a pile of rocks on the table beside her, which she would occasionally sample from in order to crush said stone between her hooves. The others grew more familiar as the party drew closer to them. Fluttershy leaned on her hoof, her eyes bored and listless. She balanced a spoon on the tips of her feathers (how in the heck was that physically possible?) tossing it to herself without looking at the utensil. Rainbow Dash sat beside her, grinning like an idiot and rocking back and forth on her stool. Every time she leaned too close to Fluttershy, she was pushed the opposite direction with a rough shove of her off-wing. Rarity’s normally porcelain… skin? Hair? Her normally porcelain coat was matted and shabby, and her mane was a rat’s nest of unkempt curls. She glanced over her shoulder at the approaching visitors, tossed her head back, and refused to acknowledge them further. At the center of the menagerie sat an orange-coated, blonde-maned approximation of the strong, steady individual Twilight knew as Applejack. This Applejack, unlike her boyfriend’s sister, seemed to wear her grumpy expression as a daily exercise rather than a momentary outlet. She locked eyes with Twilight and twisted her lips, as if daring Twilight to speak out of turn. She crossed her strong forelegs across her chest and tilted in her chair. “Well, well, if it ain’t Twilight Sparkle… in stereo.” Fluttershy spared Princess Twilight a glance. “Who’d you have to kill to get those wings?” Princess Twilight sputtered, her teeth snapping in her haste to reply. “What the heck is that supposed to mean?” “She’s not the doctor,” Pinkie Pie said, her voice as high-pitched and spritely as ever. Her expression remained as grim as could be, and it gave Twilight a queasy feeling in her stomach. “Guess her big plan was doomed to failure from the start.” Rainbow Dash threw her head back and groaned to the ceiling. “Bored now! Why do I hafta sit here with you losers? I have wing-ups I could be doing.” Fluttershy extended a wingtip and watched the spoon spin atop it. “In your cell?” “Yeah!” Rainbow threw a foreleg out towards the visitors. “I don’t know half of these people, and I don’t wanna. There’s just gonna be more blah, blah, blah, it’s all the doc ever did, and I… Don’t… Care.” Applejack gritted her teeth behind a newfound nearly-congenial smile she gave to Warden Dulcimer. “Please don’t pay the knucklehead any mind. We’re always pleased as punch to get some fresh air. Ain’t we, girls?” That last sentence was said with a pint of venom laced into it. The other ponies at the table sat up a little straighter as they replied. “Yes, Applejack.” Queen Chrysalis tapped a cloven hoof against the ground and spread a wing towards the table. “Honored guests, allow me to introduce you to Applejack, former head of the Apple Crime Family.” Twilight’s mind encountered a rolling fog as that thought entered her head. “Who the whatnow?” “Crime family?” Princess Twilight’s voice sounded like it echoed Twilight’s confusion. “What the heck? Applejack?” Applejack rolled her eyes and placed a ratty, hole-filled hat on her head. “I thought the same thing when I heard two Twilight Sparkles were comin’ to visit. Can we please get past the whole ‘Whoa, alternate universe shenanigans!?’ an’ get to the point?” She snarled at the Changeling Queen. “An’ quit besmirchin’ the name of the Apple Family! We ain’t nothin’ but hardworkin’ business folk.” Fluttershy sneered beneath her hoof. “With all the folksy small-town charm of a tar-and-feathering.” Rainbow Dash snorted, which dissolved into sputtered giggles. “See, it’s funny that she said that, because you totally tarred and feathered Zephyr B—” Rarity kicked Rainbow Dash beneath the table. The pegasus in question yanked her hind leg onto her stool and rubbed the sore spot. “Hoi! What gives? You got some kinda slap-happy bug?” Rarity hissed her answer through gritted teeth. “I’m trying to prevent you from reopening old wounds, oh gormless one.” “What are you talkin’ about? I’ve got plenty of gorm! I’m a regular gorm suppository!” Rarity wilted like a flower in a volcano, her face turning the slightest shade of green. “‘Depository.’ It’s ‘depository,’ dearest.” “Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said, her snoot in the air. “That’s what I said.” Fluttershy rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” Applejack stared directly at Rainbow Dash until she noticed. Dash hid behind Fluttershy, apparently entirely deaf to the fact that her fellow pegasus mare would not in any way stand between her and the object of her fear. “Those particular assault charges were, if I recall correctly, dropped.” Applejack cast a dim glower at Twilight Sparkle. “On account of there bein’ no witnesses to the alleged crime.” Twilight Sparkle stepped forward at the same time Princess Twilight did. The two of them glanced at each other, then sat beside each other, across from Applejack herself. Little Spike stood between them, his pen at the ready to take notes. “Speaking of crimes and the witnesses thereof…” Twilight Sparkle leaned on the table and cast a wary glance at the intimidating aura of Pinkie Pie. “The queen tells me you know a thing or two about Dr. Twilight Sparkle.” Applejack raised one eyebrow and sent a smarmy smirk Pinkie’s way. “An’ here I thought the two purple pony people just wanted my family’s apple pie recipe! Hot dog, ain’t this just the most Nowheresville conversation you ever did have?” Pinkie’s stern frown did not budge an inch. “Hilarious, boss.” “Then let’s bring it home.” Princess Twilight’s voice was taut as a whip. “What is your relation to Dr. Twilight Sparkle? Please be thorough and precise.” Applejack huffed and leaned back in her chair. “You’re in the business of buttin’ into others’ business. I get it. You wanna know ’bout the crime that got us all thrown in the slammer, right? I doubt you care about bygones from years ago. You just know she’s up to sommat in your world, and you wanna know what that sommat is.” Twilight hunched her shoulders, adjusting her holster beneath her jacket. “You can let us worry about the context. Just tell us what you can about the doctor.” “The doc?” Applejack gave them a grimy smile. “Well, just turned out she was a few spokes short of a wagon wheel, if you get my meanin’. We’d been workin’ with her for years. Collecting mechanical knickknacks and doohickies on the down-low—” Rarity batted at her curls. “Black-market dealings are my speciality.” “So that she could build some sort of device she didn’t want Spike or Sombra—or anybody at court—to know ’bout.” Applejack reached into her hat and pulled out an old piece of straw that looked maybe a little moldy. She stuck it between her teeth and chewed. “Always figured she was the mad-scientist sort, so I left well enough alone. Got to minimum safe distance, I thought. But then things got weird. She didn’t want no mechanical components no more. Nah. She wanted bodies.” A slow, small smile crawled across Fluttershy’s face. Like a centipede across a half-eaten grapefruit. “Females. All approximately her body type. One of each tribe. People who wouldn’t be missed.” Applejack gave Fluttershy a dour onceover. “Had to hire out a contract to this here pony wrangler, if I wanted to see a bit of the money the doc was pumping out. Left a bad taste in my mouth.” Fluttershy tossed the spoon to her other wing. “But you still hired me.” “Business is business.” Applejack must have noticed that the sickly feeling in Twilight’s stomach was reaching her facial expression, because she leaned in and stared her directly in the eye. “See, the machine she didn’t want anybody to know about? It sacrificed three lives… in order to make another pony immortal. Thought maybe I could get a piece of that pie, if’n I played my cards right. Turns out I’m a lousy judge of character.” Rainbow Dash ceased her constant rocking just long enough to thrust a hoof in the air. “But then… kaboom!” Princess Twilight leaned away from Rainbow Dash just a hair further. “And what do you mean by… ‘kaboom?’” “She means, dearest,” Rarity said, “that the experiment was an explosive failure.” Applejack bobbed her head. “A’yup. Blew her right to Hell and back. Probably woulda died if’n Spike there hadn’t pulled her outta the wreckage.” She grinned maliciously as Edgy Spike turned away from the conversation. “Good ol’ dependable Spike.” “That coulda been the end of the story,” Pinkie Pie said in that chipper voice that didn’t match up at all with her body language. “But Dr. Twilight Sparkle is tenacious.” Applejack tapped the tabletop. “She rebuilt. Again. And Again. Each time, she had three more bodies. Each time, they ended up exploded to bits. Each time, she tried again with three more victims.” She shook her head slowly. “It does things to yah, treatin’ life like a commodity. Sucks your soul right out. Didn’t even notice what was happening until I actually took a body-count. She’d taken as many lives as any serial killer you might happen to know. More than most. And it was all for nothin’.” Fluttershy thunked the spoon on the table, as if she intended to stab the tip through the wood. Since the utensil lacked a point, it clattered harmlessly to its side. “Applejack told me not to find any more victims. Didn’t stop what happened next, though.” Applejack bit her lower lip, somewhere between a fond smile and a suppressed growl. “That Twilight was a crafty sort. When I told her I wasn’t gonna participate in her little murder ritual-slash-suicide attempt anymore, she told me plain to my face she’d been collecting evidence against me for as long as I’d known her. My associates here, too. She said she’d expose me unless I did exactly as she said. I refused.” Applejack spread her hooves out to indicate the mess hall. “So here I am today, tried for my numerous crimes against equinity, while Dr. Twilight’s gone off to another world and escaped justice. Some kinda world we live in, huh?” Twilight Sparkle bit down on the edge of her hoof. “Do… do you have any idea why her experiments exploded?” “Ain’t a wizard. Sorry-not-sorry.” Applejack shrugged and crossed her forelegs behind her head. “Anythin’ else you wanna know?” Princess Twilight nodded. “I wouldn’t mind a list of all the parts the doctor needed for her machine. I suspect Rarity’s receipts are somewhere in evidence?” Pinkie Pie’s hoof rustled around in her curly mane. “I keep a copy on hand at all times in case of ‘testifying for a lighter sentence’ emergencies.” Rarity gasped. “Dearest Pinkie Pie! That is my private property!” “Seized by the crown,” Fluttershy snickered. “Even if nobody can quite agree on who wears the crown.” Queen Chrysalis pointedly ignored her and retrieved the list from Pinkie Pie. “Does any of this look familiar?” Princess Twilight only scanned for a moment before pulling a book out of her saddlebags. The cover was a dark leather, and the pages within were older than any building in Libertas. “As I suspected. These are all equivalents for parts from the evil King Sombra’s alicorn device.” “Being a wizard…” Twilight Sparkle looked over the princess’ shoulder and found nothing but gibberish on the pages. “Can you figure out why the doctor’s experiments failed?” “With a few days to build models and run calculations, maybe, but…” She looked down at her shorter counterpart. “I don’t think we’ve got that kinda time. We need that sealing spell from the lab.” Applejack’s eyebrows rose to her bangs. “Her lab? The doctor’s lab? You mean in the castle, where King Sombra’s busy bein’ some sorta lich-ghost-demon-monster? That lab?” Twilight pressed her lips tight to keep in a hair-curling curse. “Yeah. That lab exactly.” “Dang, girl.” Applejack looked over her shoulder with a decidedly menacing grin. “Tell King Sombra I said hi!” There was movement at Little Spike’s side. Rarity leaned against his arm, rubbing her hoof across his chest. “Have I mentioned how I just loooove a stallion in purple? Someone to carry me away from this dreadful place and—” “Yeee—I have a girlfriend, miss.” Little Spike practically leaped out of her arms and skittered over to Edgy Spike’s side. He shivered, rubbing his arms with his claws. “Holy cow, she just made me feel like I’m covered in earth worms.” “Know the feeling, bud.” Edgy Spike narrowed his eyes as Rarity was forcefully returned to her chair by guardsponies. “I know the feeling well.” Twilight Sparkle turned to Princess Twilight with a snort. “As if we didn’t already need to go to the castle. Sounds like everything matches up; using fairy strings to ascend to alicornhood. Just like your Dulcimer.” Warden Dulcimer nearly choked on his own spittle. “I beg your pardon?” Princess Celestia rested a calming wing on his back. “Our world had its own Dulcimer, but you needn’t worry about him. He and his deeds have no bearing on you.” “Yeah. Sorry.” Twilight ducked her head and brushed her bags away from her face. “Too many people sharing the same name around here.” Princess Twilight took Little Spike’s notes and gave them a once-over. “We should head outside to prepare. We’ve got plans to make and disguises to assume. Seems the rabbit trail that is ‘the mysterious Dr. Twilight Sparkle’ doesn’t end here.” “Do the mysteries ever end?” Twilight narrowed her eyes at the princess. “What do you mean ‘disguises?’” *** Shining Armor laid his ears against his head to prevent his little sister’s rage-fueled screeches from rupturing his eardrums. Her words echoed around the prison courtyard, and could probably be heard from across all of Equestria. “You gotta be kidding me!” Edgy Spike shuffled his feet in the dust, clasping his claws behind his back. “I’m sorry, but—” Twilight Sparkle gripped the collar of her shirt tight between her hooves. “I am not going nude into the castle!” Queen Chrysalis raised a regal foreleg, lending Edgy Spike a vote of support. “Dr. Twilight did not much care for clothes in the first place, and your garb is very obviously not tailor-made for an equine frame.” “If I’ve said it once,” Twilight Sparkle seethed, “I’ve said it a thousand times! My country has a nudity taboo! I can’t just walk around in the buff! I’d feel like an idiot! I’d be beyond self-conscious!” “And Sombra would no doubt see through the deception before you so much as had a chance to speak.” Princess Celestia smiled congenially at Twilight. “It is only for a day, at the most. Embarrassment is a small price to pay for seeing this adventure through to the end.” Shining Armor, his face almost as red as Big Mac’s, tapped his hooves together. “If it helps, Sunset has no trouble walking around nude when she’s a pony.” “That…” Twilight said slowly, “is because… Sunset Shimmer… is a crazy person! She’d walk around buck-naked in the supermarket if she wouldn’t be arrested for it!” Princess Twilight let out a loud groan of exasperation. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing, Twilight. Just strip and get it over with.” “This! Is! Not! Nothing!” Twilight punctuated each word with a stomp of her hooves. “Can’t I at least wear a dress or a cape or something?” Princess Twilight’s voice lowered to just above a growl. “They explained it very clearly, Twilight. You’ll wear no clothes, remove your ear piercings, and replace your glasses with a vision-enhancing spell. There is no room to barter, no loopholes to find, just you doing your job without complaining.” Twilight stood as close to eye-to-eye with the princess as possible. “Ex-ca-use me?” “Everybody here is counting on you, Twilight,” Princess Twilight snapped. “The people who’ve had no hope for years, the countries that haven’t known peace, and us. We’re relying on you just to get home. Let go of your pride and do the right thing.” A sinister slither of a smirk crept across her muzzle. “Today, ‘the right thing’ is to get nekkid.” Twilight Sparkle bit back a particularly vicious curse. She lit her horn and peeled her jacket away from her shoulders. Princess Twilight walked away, but not before whispering out of the side of her mouth. “You aren’t always right, either.” Twilight chucked the jacket with a spell and whacked Princess Twilight right across the face with it. The fabric covered the princess’ head, muting her shriek of surprise. She undid the top button of her shirt. She glared fiery daggers at the other people scattered around the courtyard. “What is this, a peep show? Turn around, you morons!” Shining Armor spun around with all due speed, Big Mac trailing just a bit behind. The stallion’s reddish face had grown a tinge of purple in light of recent events. Mac turned to Shining with a thin, flat line of a mouth. “I don’t rightly know what I thought I was gettin’ into when I jumped into that there pool.” Shining Armor wriggled the edge of his hoof in his ear, hoping to stop the ringing. “Adventure is never quite what you expect. Like life. You just sorta gotta roll with the punches and do your best to keep your head above water.” He noticed that Big Mac’s mouth was moving slowly. If he strained his ears, he could hear him whispering softly. “What are you doing?” “Countin’ to a hundred.” “Why’s that?” “So I don’t think about…” Big Mac’s entire head was practically glowing with inner fire. “So I keep myself occupied on… um…” Shining Armor’s synapses fired just before Big Mac’s could completely expire. His normally-confident voice faltered ever-so-slightly. “Keeping you mind off the fact that Twilight is—” “Shining, please.” A catlike grin banished his bashfulness as he leaned into an opportunity to make Mac squirm. “You’ve been dating for seven years, you know.” “It ain’t gentlemanly to—” “I’m just saying, Twilight would probably be open to the thought of wearing a ring.” “Do you mind—?” “Waking up next to each other every morning. Long conversations into the night…” “I swear, if you don’t shut your yap—” “Just wondering when I’m likely to get a brother-in-law. That’s all.” “It’ll happen,” Big Mac yelped, “when we’re good an’ ready!” “Good and ready to what?” Twilight Sparkle said. Big Mac swung around to face her before he could think better of it. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head. He sat down hard and stuck his nose straight up into the air. “Ain’t no thing, Twi. Just Shining bein’ an idiot. Sorry ’bout lookin’ and such…” His voice trailed off to a whimpered whisper. Twilight Sparkle held her bundled clothes close to her chest and the underside of her torso. She stared straight at Shining Armor until she could catch his eyes. “Nobody hears about this, you understand?” Her tone was serious. Terminal, even. “Not a soul.” Shining Armor nodded slowly, in complete and utter fear for his life. She shuffled her way to Big Mac and put a hoof on his foreleg. “It’s fine, Mac. You didn’t do anything wrong. I’m… not even really ‘naked’ if there’s nothing to see, right?” “Duh, um…” Big Mac attempted to give her a reassuring sort of loving glance, but his nervous sweat and wide eyes were anything but. “Pretty gurl, a’yup.” Twilight shut her eyes tight and leaned her forehead against his chest. “Oh, son of a—” Big Mac puffed his cheeks out as Princess Twilight approached. She attempted to pry the clothes out of Twilight’s deathlike grip, but even with magic at her disposal, it was a harrowing battle. Twilight Sparkle clung to his leg when the clothes were finally handed to Shining for safekeeping. Big Mac sighed deep within his chest as he hugged his equine-shaped girlfriend. “This had better not awaken somethin’ in me.”