The Life of Sunset Shimmer

by Pastelglitches


The Best For You

From the moment she was born, Stellar Flare expected great things from her child, and she didn’t let Sunset forget this. 

Sunset Shimmer was the oldest child of Stellar Flare, a failed mathematician turned brilliant architect, and Sunspot, an astrologist. Her mother was raised in the small town of Appleloosa, labeled as a “gifted kid” until she burnt herself out for good after getting kicked out of the fancy Canterlot university she’d given all her life savings to. Stellar had made the best of her situation, but would not have her daughter caught in the same crossfire. Why did Stellar fail so miserably? Was it because the school system put too much expectation on her young shoulders, raising her above her peers and demanding her to be better simply because she grasped a concept easier? No, no, it was Stellar’s fault, of course; she didn’t do enough, she let herself believe that she was special, but all the lords and ladies of Canterlot were miles above her own academic abilities. She wouldn’t have that for Sunset. Not any of her children, really.

From the moment she could walk and talk, Sunset Shimmer was taught she needed to do better. If you want mommy to be proud of you, an A on a big assignment isn’t enough, you need straight A+’s and you need to work yourself to the bone, my love. Can’t you see I just want the best for you? There was a fantastical destiny out there waiting for her, if she was smart enough to chase it. You are smart, sweet boy, it would do you good to remember that.

Growing up, Sunset never felt like she was enough. She was never enough of a boy, of a student, of a child. Every breath was critically examined, every move she made was watched like a hawk, all while her mother’s jabs stormed her mind. She tried so hard, but the way everypony else got through life so easily… it felt like an invisible barrier was between her and what she could do. She was capable of great things, her sweetly father told her so, but she had to try. She was always trying so, so hard. It was never enough, not just for Stellar, but for Sunset. None of it satisfied her. Sunset became obsessed with accomplishing greatness and stardom, she needed to be liked, no-- not liked, loved. Adored. And she would do anything for that rush of praise, as if it was the only way she could allow being even a little proud of herself.

She waved off friends in favor of her studies. She was cut-throat in her pursuit of elementary valedictorian. She had to be on every student council, president of every club, or else what was she even good for? If she didn’t become all she good be, then everything her mother wanted for her would be an utter waste. She’d be a failure. She wouldn’t disappoint Stellar Flare like that. 

At least Sunspot was always there for her, right?... Right?

Sunset was too young to fully grasp what it meant. Pressure weighed heavily on her shoulders, dragging her self-image through the mud. You don’t deserve this, you didn’t work hard enough for this, nothing you do will make her love you because you’re just a fucking failure. The attention was suffocating and she felt like at any moment she’d just--oh. Oh, no, no, no.... No! All she knew was that she would be a big… big brother--why did that word feel so wrong to her?--to a baby sister. Her mother was pregnant, and for the first time, she wasn’t the apple of her father’s eye. Now Sunspot was constantly hovering around his wife, no matter what Sunset did. Maybe if she did better, he would love her like he used to? So she did everything, she took extra classes, she practiced her magic non-stop, she became something of a teacher’s aid, she tutored her peers, she even tried making friends for Celestia’s sake, but the real kicker turned out to be when she earned her cutie mark. On the same day her little sister came into the world.

Sunburst was born. And for the first time in her life, the weight was lifted. The attention shifted, and instead of taking the opportunity to breathe, it felt humiliating. She’d given up her self-worth, her sleep, her fickle friendships for the limelight, and this is how they repay her? By replacing her, with this--this stupid filly? It wasn’t fair, she thought. That’s when she learned nothing ever is. 

Her mother and father doted on little Sunburst endlessly. Mother was never so cutesy with her. Why did Sunburst deserve her affections more than Sunset? The only explanation was that Stellar Flare loved him more. The thought planted a seed of resentment inside Sunset, so much so that when Stellar Flare began being more kind and affirming with Sunset, she thought it was all a ploy to pity her. Sunspot was much too busy with the new baby to read her bedtime stories like he did before. It had to be something she’d done. Or maybe it was that vile, dumb little creature that her parents called her sister. 

Sunset Shimmer grew distant towards her family, including her innocent sibling. She lost the respect and envy her mother and father had been drowning in before, no matter that her mother was being nice now! If she couldn’t get their undivided attention, then she would look for it elsewhere. She focused on getting the attention of a real hero, of somepony who actually mattered. She wanted to be beloved by all, and who had that title? Oh, Celestia, give me a name-- wait. Princess Celestia! Wasn’t she opening a boarding school for unicorns? Well, Sunset was one of those… perhaps it was time she focused on something other than science and math. Magic was where the real power lied.

She works tirelessly to perfect her spells. She reads any book she can get her hooves on, she listens to anypony who will tell her a new technique, a new way to unleash the magicks stormed within herself, within every creature, place, and thing. She spams Princess Celestia’s business emails. No reply. The disappointment only fuels her, as it’s always done.

A couple of years pass her by. Firelight, Mother and Father’s best friend, has a daughter. Starlight Glimmer makes her grand entrance, her life exchanged for her mother’s. Overcome with grief, Firelight moved in with her parents. It was supposed to be a temporary arrangement, just until the stallion got back on his feet. He never expected to care for his darling Chipmunk Cheeks alone! And, with Sunspot and Stellar Flare by his side, he wouldn’t have to. They were seasoned parents, after all. Starlight Glimmer wasn’t the problem. It was who she came with. Sunset had noticed the long eye contact, stolen glances, the lingering touch between her mother and Firelight. She became wary of him, scared that he would replace Sunspot in her life. That couldn’t happen. Her dad was the only parent that spared her a scrap of attention, as much as he could manage between three children, if he was gone… she would be alone. He would be alone. The thought made Sunset hate Firelight with everything she had. She always snapped at Firelight, avoided him at all costs, even if he offered her praise. It felt as hollow as Stellar’s.

After a few months of him living with them, her parents sat her down. She filled with dread at the idea she was going to have another sibling. Luckily, that wasn’t the case. The truth was something she hated even more. 

Firelight and Stellar Flare were in love, and he’d be staying permanently.

Sunset Shimmer was furious. Even if it was with the consent and mutualing feelings of/and for Sunspot. The three had been in love for a long time, and it took being cramped together caring for their three kids to finally understand that. They fell beautifully into a triad. Their eldest was the first one they told about their new relationship... she didn’t take it well. Refusing to believe that Sunspot was very much a part of the relationship, Sunset lashed out, screaming about how her mother was an ungrateful whore, and how Firelight had no right to be in her house. Her yells outed them to the entirety of Sire’s Hollow. Sire’s was divided by conservatives and liberals who often bickered, so let’s just say… The trio wasn’t immediately accepted into the community. Suddenly, it was very difficult for her mother, father or for Firelight to get through the day without being insulted or berated. When she finally came down, guilt and shame ate at Sunset Shimmer. 

The school counselor called it “anger management issues,” only made worse by the ADHD that had gone untreated and undiagnosed until this incident. Amends to her curriculum would have to be made… perhaps AP classes were too struggling for you, hmm, Sunset? Maybe being student president was too much pressure, right? It felt like they were all spitting in her face. This didn’t make her less worthy of everything she’d worked so many nights for. She didn’t want to be like this. She couldn’t mess up, she could do it, she promised, nothing had to change! She could do it, she could do it all, just give her a chance! Reluctantly, they did. And now, if Sunset failed, it wouldn’t only be her mother who was disappointed; it would be everypony in the entire town. Fuck. But any time Sunset felt the rage taking hold, she was told to step back, breathe, deconstruct the anger, find what it hid behind itself. She could make it look like it worked in public. But when she was alone, isolating herself in her spellbook-riddled room... there was nothing to hold her back.

The breathing exercises prevented further public episodes, but it didn’t help the damage she caused between her family. In their faces, there was always the reminder of what she had done. Sunspot wasn’t her safespace anymore. She couldn’t just blame it all on Firelight. She didn’t trust herself around Sunburst and Starlight. She became like a ghost in her own house. Her family tried to talk to her, but Sunset would lock herself in her room for days on end. 

Finally, when Sunset Shimmer was fourteen, everything she did paid off. For the first time, her email wasn’t deleted by some uncaring teacher thinking Sunset to be a little foal. Princess Celestia herself replied to an email of hers, and was formally invited to the student auditions taking place in Equestria’s very own capitol, Canterlot, the very city her mother had been spurned from when she was a child. Sunset was over the moon, and for the first time, her mother seemed proud of her. Stellar Flare told everypony she came across about what Sunset had achieved. It made Sunset’s cheeks burn with joy, even if Stellar’s exact words were always “my son something or other.” Sunset still didn’t like that word, son. Brother. The name she lived with all her life. 

It didn’t mean anything. 

It didn’t have to mean anything. 

She was good at putting it off.

They arrived in Canterlot. Stellar’s stories of the beautiful place were nothing compared to actually being there. Firelight had to keep trampling over his hooves to keep Starlight and Sunburst from running into all the pretty, shiny shops, and Sunspot was practically leaping in place at all the elite scientists stashed away here… Stellar seemed particularly glad to be back, and Sunset could barely keep herself still. She was filled with worry. Her entire life was dedicated to this day. If she messed up… that wasn’t an option for her.

The judges needed a show of her magical ability. At their strict frowns and knitted brows, Sunset found herself crumbling. She stumbled through the tests, and at the glint in their eyes, she knew it was only mere moments before they told her how she had failed. Her mind raced and her hooves buzzed, an idea forming within her that she didn’t truly understand, she just knew it was her only option, so she took it, acting on impulse. 

She saw red.

She let the anger fill her to the brim. Her magic lashed out in her rage. Suddenly, lightning crackled around her. The window curtains fall down, shadows overtaking the room, and then… And then the fireflies came. Not real fireflies, but that’s what Sunburst and Starlight cheered. Balls of bursting golden light, hanging in the air like speckles, lined the room. Sunset managed to control the way she expressed her anger, finding a delicate balance between herself, and Celestia was impressed. It didn’t hurt that her cutie mark had lit up during her spectacle. She was accepted into Celestia’s Boarding School For Gifted Unicorns.

The day after, Sunset went back home and packed her things. She said her goodbyes to Firelight and Sunspot, and held Sunburst and Starlight’s hands the entire walk to the train station. As soon as Sunset had to let go, her fathers tightly hugged her, and quickly went to calm down her younger... sisters. Stellar Flare kept herself strong as Sunset walked through the threshold,  but when the train pulled away, she couldn’t stay calm anymore. Tears rolled down her face and she let out a cry of joy for Sunset. If only her daughter had heard.

At the boarding academy, Sunset Shimmer was surrounded by either peers who slacked carelessly, or students who barely slept in order to always be on top. That wasn’t different from her old school, but here the arrogant ones had the power, because they weren’t exchange students. They were born and raised in Canterlot, which meant they had rich parents that could pay for their mistakes. Sunset Shimmer was one of the many poorer children picked from faraway towns and cities. She had no safety net waiting for her if she copied those ponies. Sure, it was alluring seeing them skip class, even get away with being wasted on school property; it was like she got a contact thrill just from witnessing the behavior! She pushed the dark desire down deep until she could hardly recognize it anymore.

But she felt a tug toward them. Somehow, those types of students were always wherever she went. And eventually, they came too close for her to ignore. What’s the harm in a little eavesdropping?

“What if we get in trouble?”

“Who cares? Our parents’ll take care of it. Celestia will never even know!”

“What if her little mini-me sees us?”

“That tranny ‘Cadenza’ or whatever it calls itself has nothing on us.”

… What’s a tranny?

Sunset looks it up. She didn’t know you could do that. Was that allowed? Cadenza, that was the only pegasus in the school, the pink girl three years her junior, right? Wasn’t she Celestia’s favorite student? So Sunset should ask them about it!

Sunset Shimmer found Cadence and asked for a personal meeting with her and Princess Celestia. Cadence happily obliged. Sunset told them about what was happening in the school, and vented her curiosity about Cadence’s journey. After some time talking, Sunset came out as wanting to try being a girl. Celestia and Cadence share a look, and tell her everything, including Celestia’s own status as a transgender mare; a secret not many were privy to at the time. The rest of the day was spent with the three laughing amongst themselves, painting their hooves, going on about how pretty other girls were, trying on makeup and dresses and anything that caught Sunset’s eye. The other women were very honest about how overwhelming doing it all at once could be, so Sunset did all of it one by one, little by little, taking steps to something bigger each day they spent together. Luckily, this all took place in the Cadence’s private wing as Celestia was housing the young orphan, so Sunset felt comfortable to be herself around Cadence and her principal. 

After staying close with Cadence and Celestia for about a month, Sunset decided that she was really, truly a mare, and that she wanted to present openly as such. Cadence and Celestia helped her choose a new name; Sunset Alexandra Shimmer. Sunset came out to her family through a letter, informing them that she was going to come out to the school soon and how much she needed their support on this. When she got a letter back, her family told her that her letter helped Sunburst understand his own feelings, and she wasn’t the only trans child in the family. Supported by her family and confident in Celestia and Cadence’s abilities to protect her, Sunset went under a new name, and came to class in all her feminine glory. Turns out, Sunset being invisible to her peers would actually work in her favor. 

Nopony remembered who she was before. Knowing how Cadence was treated, Sunset decided to keep it close to the chest. Celestia paid for her estrogen potions, Cadence was her closest friend, and she was finally satisfied with her body. Shortly after, Celestia asked Sunset Shimmer if she would be so kind as to allow Celestia the honor of being her personal mentor. Sunset was ecstatic. She was raised partially by Celestia, who offered a motherly and calming aura. She wasn’t just a mentor to Sunset, no…. She was sort of a crush, too. Sunset desired her approval above all else. Celestia had huge influence over the growing mare, unbeknownst to her. 

Over the years surrounded by equally egotistical ponies, Sunset becomes confident in her abilities, a little too confident. She acted boastful and arrogant towards others. Celestia attempts to teach her about humility, but Sunset doesn’t practice any of it. What to do?

Celestia shows Sunset the magic Crystal Mirror. In it, Sunset sees herself as an Alicorn princess powerful enough to lead Equestria. But she sees a brief flash of something else, too. Celestia guides her away before she can get too curious. The damage was already done, though. During the weeks following, the mirror is the only thing on Sunset’s mind. It traps her waking thoughts and it even lingers in her dreams. Celestia tries to tell her more than once that the answer will be revealed, when Sunset is ready.

Sunset wasn’t convinced.

Sunset goes behind Celestia’s back and researches the mirror anyway, tucked inside a dark magic library. The royal castle guards walk in on her. Them, Sunset could have dealt with, but who was with them would be a little harder to fool. Princess Celestia.

The anger begins to consume her. Sunset screams at Celestia, how dare she hide such powerful magic from her? (And the other students, too, I guess.) She demands Celestia makes her into a princess, like the younger Cadence had transformed into not long after Sunset met her. Of course, Celestia refuses her student’s “request,” trying to soothe her apprentice with the fact that becoming an alicorn princess is nothing Celestia can make happen; ponies, even non-unicorns like Luna and Cadence had been, ascended naturally, once they held all the power a certain form of magic had in it. As punishment for Sunset’s actions, Celestia gave her an order; be more humble. Don’t focus on yourself for a change, my little pony; focus on others. 

Her assignment... was to make friends? How could Sunset make friends, with all the academy expected from her? She didn’t know how to be a friend, she’d never had friends before. Instead of admitting this, she got angry at Celestia. What would the princess know about friendship, about love? Celestia didn’t even have any friends! She lashed out and left Celestia stunned. As she ran, she burst into sobs; how could she say that to her? Celestia had given Sunny so much, personally and non, and she had insulted and screamed at the ruler of her country because she didn’t understand a simple task. She hated herself. Why did she keep doing this? She just got so mad every time. She couldn’t control herself. How could her cutie mark represent balance when she could never truly find her footing? She said things she didn’t mean. The anger swallowed her whole. Horrified by this, Sunset gathered her things and left Equestria. 

She went into the mirror as a unicorn pony and arrived out of a statue as a human woman. She was found breaking into Canterlot High, arrested by officers, and once it was found she had no identification, no record, nor birth certificate, police mused that she must be a runner. A kid no one would miss. They sent out missing child reports but nothing came back. With no one to offer her a home, she was thrown into juvie for a time, until she was accepted into a local school in the district; Canterlot High. After she was released from juvie, she crashed into the foster care system. Feeling bad for her, her new principles, the human versions of Celestia and Luna (since when did Princess Celestia have a sister?!) made a plea deal with Sunset’s social worker and got her into a nearby group home.

From her first day, she sucked up to Celestia. This Celestia reminded her of her own, her kind and loyal leader, always ready to help, always willing to share cake with Sunset or go shopping or give motherly advice or talk girls… This Celestia, though, only regarded her as a great student, a friend to her peers. Behind the principal’s back, Sunset wasn’t the friendliest of the bunch. She treated people poorly, “putting them in their place.” Letting them know they’d never be better than her. Even as the voice in her head told her that a speck of dust was better than her. She found time moved strangely in this world than in Equestria; in this dimension, some things were completely slowed down, while others were sped up beyond comprehension. In the pony world, she was nearly an adult, but here she was only roughly sixteen. She found she aged slower than the other… “humans.” That she didn’t age at all here. Meanwhile, human Cadence, who had been three years younger than Sunset in her original world, was a full, legal, seasoned adult. Hmm.

After what was only a few months in the human world, Sunset risked a view inside the mirror. There, more than ten years had passed since she left. Her siblings were adults, her Cadence was even married now-- but the thing that filled her thoughts . . . Celestia had easily replaced her with a braindead dolt, the Princess Twilight Sparkle. That filly was more than ten years younger than Sunset! She was inexperienced, unsophisticated, hardly trained in the way of upper society and professional etiquette. She cosplayed as Starswirl the Bearded, for Celestia’s sake! Sunset viewed Twilight as an immature child, a flimsy replacement, someone who was in all accounts unworthy of ascension. So, in the protection of night, she walked among Equestria once again, and stole the Princess of Friendship’s crown, forcing Twilight to go after her. In the end, Sunset was overtaken by jealousy, bitterness and that ever-festering anger. She was defeated, of course, and once on the ground…. She felt her chest heave. And she finally, finally let it all out. 

Everything that was bottled inside her since childhood exploded from a messy Sunset Shimmer. She was offered forgiveness, if she wanted to work for it. And so, she did. 

The rest of her days were spent with the human Mane Six. She earned their trust, and even their friendship. The Canterlot student body forgave her. The many adventures they shared still bring a smile to Sunset’s face. They certainly didn’t save the world as much as their horse counterparts, but… but they saved their world a few times, and that was important, too. It meant everything to Sunset. But the years flew passed, and her peers grew and graduated. Her friends left their town for bigger and better things. 

Sunset was still in the body of a child. She didn’t have anything keeping her here anymore. Maybe it was time she faced everything she’d left behind. So, Sunset returned to Equestria. 

Twilight was happy to house her as Sunset was torn between her two worlds. She ran into Starlight Glimmer almost immediately. It was a shock of a reunion. Both sisters stared at each other, mouth agape, faces white, for what was probably five minutes, but felt like forever. Then tears crept from Starlight, and Sunset Shimmer’s big-sister-mode was activated. She wrapped her baby stepsister in a hug and held her until the tears stopped falling from both of them. Twilight was fairly confused by the scene. After they’d told her about everything, Sunset’s sure she was startled for at least an hour. 

The two spent the rest of the day talking, y’know, life. Wow, Star, you were a hypocritical cultist/terrorist? Damn, the worst I did was mind-control a bunch of scrawny bipedal ape children! Starlight got Sunset back in touch with their brother Sunburst--”you’re telling me my baby bro is now married to my old best friend?” (Imagine her reaction when Twilight informed her that their brothers were also together, and both married to the pony version of Flash Sentry, also with the old tyrant king Sombra)--and Sunset felt the wind get knocked out of her when Starlight told her about their baby sister, Moondancer, spell-born daughter of all three of their parents. Sunset had to see this! 

Soon, they held a family reunion in Sire's Hollow. That might have been the first time Sunset Shimmer’s mother ever hugged her. She awkwardly met Moondancer, who Sunset couldn’t stop throwing back sisterly bicker with. Firelight scrunched her cheeks and called her his darling Pumpkin-Whumpkin! Sunspot barely let her out of his sight. Sunburst and her kept knocking back trans jokes. Her cousin Spitfire was loud as hell, something Sunset admired, and Sunset thought she could teach Spitfire’s brother Short Fuse a thing or two about how to manage his anger when needed. It was all Sunset had hoped for. 

Thankfully, it wasn't limited to just Sunset’s family! She got to meet her brother’s dear partners (“hang on, all of you are trans? Can I marry you?”) and her colorful niblings. Moondancer was even married to Cadence’s great-great… something-cousin, Duke Blueblood, and Fluttershy’s brother Zephyr Breeze. It was all so new and confusing, but Sunset wouldn’t pass up meeting any of them! Starlight Glimmer even brought along her best friend, the human version of Trixie Lulamoon, who followed Sunset around questioning her on the human Trixie. Sunset had to admit, Starlight had good taste in friends… 

Because Sunset was living in Ponyville with Twilight, the two sisters spent the most time together. Trixie was usually with Starlight, so a lot of their sister-bonding time was imposed on by Trixie, not that either sister minded. Human or pony, they were both used to her shenanigans, and Sunset found herself liking this version of her. A budding friendship blossomed, filled with snark and sarcasm and lots of swapping embarrassing stories about Glimmer. Sunset slowly started spending much more time in the pony world than in the human one. Because of her family, of course! No one else! 

One day, the three were binging shows Sunset had missed out on. They were indulging themselves by playing truth or dare to stimulate Sunset and Trixie’s ADHD. When Starlight was in the bathroom, Trixie dared Sunset Shimmer to prank her sister by making her believe her best friend and her sister were sugary, syrupy-sweet girlfriends. 

So, Trixie and Sunset steal a kiss while Starlight is walking back in the room. Starlight is clearly shocked by it. Wordlessly, the pair decides to see how long they can con her for. They expect a few hours at most. So, they tell Starlight they want to date, but oh-so-desperately desire her blessing! Starlight finds it absolutely embarrassing, and refuses. Even though the prank works, they... don't stop. They decide to keep it going until Starlight Glimmer gives their totally fake relationship her seal of approval, and then they would tear the rug from under her! They go on with their shows of grand affection, drowning the other in flowers and chocolate gifts and random snuggies. Everytime Trixie and Sunset are in the same room, Sunset has her arm over her, or they're loudly making out, or obnoxiously complimenting each other, or ear-nippling, or grinding or doing bunny kisses or writing a love poem in her honor-- it’s all so much, so “that” couple… they even keep it on when they’re in private, ‘cause, y’know, what is someone’s looking in?!

Months pass, and Starlight is still trying to work through them dating. She tells them she needs some space and time, and leaves them alone before they can reveal the truth. Eventually, she gives in, admitting that the two seem really happy together.... she realizes she's been wrong, and apologizes, giving them her blessing. That's when they admit that aha you just got prannked bro and Starlight’s very confused, to say the least. It’s been about six months since the “prank” started. Sunset and Trixie barely noticed how much time had gone by, the other filling their days. Dating and kissing and hugging and cuddling and singing for and loving Trixie Lulamoon had quickly become Sunset’s normal, normal enough that it didn’t even feel fake anymore. Starlight Glimmer tells them that they should just hook up already, they’re clearly into each other, it’s okay you gay morons! 

They take her advice a little too literally. Sunset hadn’t been in the pony world long enough to even think about bottom surgery, so… Trixie ends up pregnant. The soon-to-be mothers are surprised, but excited and overjoyed, and… in love. So helplessly, obnoxiously in love. They hold a huge wedding, all expenses paid for by Trixie’s dads Jackpot and Big Bucks. They get their own quaint place in Ponyville, settling in quite nicely. Trixie gives birth to a healthy baby boy and together, they name him the great and powerful Apollo Loxias. Their son.

She still communicates with the human version of the Mane Six through the book. Even if their exchanges have been dwindling as of late, they’re still so happy for their old friend!.. Huh. Old friend? Sunset hadn’t realized that she considered them that until then. And how Trixie loved hearing Sunset’s stories about their adventures, but… but . . . 

The world of her old friends had changed without her, and Sunset wasn’t phased by that. She felt like she should have been, but it felt natural. Sunset decides that, perhaps, she’s outgrown the human realm, and it her. It was her safety net when she needed it. 

She didn’t need a safety net anymore.