“I really can’t believe this, I’m soaring in the air at incredible speeds! This is working a lot better than anypony could have thought. Don’t you agree, Anon?” Starlight asked as she kept the plane at a brisk pace. Nothing too fast, perhaps, even a little slower than Rainbow Dash. You couldn’t tell, as her magic kept you from feeling any more G-forces from the speed of the jet and Rainbow Dash was nowhere in sight.
“Yeah, everything seems to be stable too.” You lift the visor on your helmet to get a good look at the clouds Starlight was tearing through. You really were moving fast, just not ‘mach’ fast. “Weren’t we racing Rainbow Dash though? I don’t think we passed her yet.”
“Oh, we’re still racing alright. I just want to sneak up on her first and wait for her to go full speed.” Starlight let out a reassured sigh, one of arrogance. “Oh, it’s gonna be great. Once she goes full speed, we go full speed. I gotta warn you though, the magic stabilizers can only do so much.”
“What do you mean by that?” You asked
“It means you’re cleaning up your own puke when this is over.” Starlight said as she began to peer forward for Rainbow Dash. “Would have been nice to have a working radar. But I just couldn’t figure out how to even get started with something like that.”
You looked down at the small pool of puke you had made on the side of your seat. “Sheesh, I just got caught off guard, that’s all.” She didn’t have to call attention to it, it was an accident. Ugh, yeesh, maybe she did have to call attention to it. Thinking of it like that made you seem like a baby.
“I know, but you’re still cleaning it up.” Starlight said as she focused her sights on spotting Rainbow Dash.
“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” You groan as you continue to stare at the passing clouds. For a chase, this wasn’t as exciting as it could be. And… You did have three charges, so why not? This spell would fit the occasion.
Starlight suddenly lost focus when she heard music playing around her. “What the? What is-”
“Revvin' up your engine
Listen to her howlin' roar”
“That music? Where is it coming from?” Starlight said as she continued to look around. “Anon, do you hear that?”
“Metal under tension
Beggin' you to touch and go”
Starlight then looks back at you, as you give her a cool grin, your horn sparking atop your forehead.
“Highway to the Danger Zone
Ride into the Danger Zone”
“This music…” Starlight went silent for a moment, realizing it was you who summoned it. “I feel…”
“Headin' into twilight
Spreadin' out her wings tonight”
“I feel it. I feel it in every bone in my body.” Starlight continued as her focus shifted to the throttle.
“She got you jumpin' off the deck
Shovin' into overdrive”
“Overdrive…” Starlight licked her at her muzzle hungrily as she looked at the throttle once more, brought her hoof over it, and pushed it forward. “HIGHWAY TO THE DANGER ZONE! RIDE IN-Oh er, t-take you into the DANGER ZONE!” Starlight yelled out, flubbing up the lyrics to a song she didn't know.
“Are you feelin’ it, Starlight?” You said with a snicker.
“You'll never say hello to you
Until you get it on the red line overload
You'll never know what you can do
Until you get it up as high as you can go”
“Oh, I’m feelin’ it alright. I don’t know what it is. I can’t begin to describe it but…” As the jet began to go faster and faster, both you and her could feel the force of the plane pushing through the stabilization magic. You were ready this time, bracing yourself, as Starlight herself leaned forward as she spotted Rainbow Dash doing her best to maintain high speeds. “We’re doing it…”
“Out along the edges
Always where I burn to be”
“We’re going to go beyond the beyonds, you and me. Pushing magic and technology to an inconceivable level, that beyond even Starswirl’s skills.” Starlight began to say, louder and louder in her tone, like she was reaching a climax.
“The further on the edge
The hotter the intensity”
“To the pinnacle, to the highest place possible!” Starlight, as if she really was some sort of ace pilot, is able to fly above Rainbow Dash with ease, and begins matching her speed as she flips the jet lower to look down at her. She didn't care about her plan anymore, she was in the zone. “And that place is…”
“Highway to the Danger Zone
Gonna take it right into the Danger Zone
Highway to the Danger Zone
Ride into, the Danger Zone”
You both began to sing as you and Starlight looked down upon Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash couldn’t believe her eyes, she was about to do her Sonic Rainboom, she was nearly at top speeds, conserving her energy for this moment, and somehow, she was already bested before she could reach it. She was utterly shocked as she looked upon you and Starlight, you both were singing as her own ears were near deafened by the engine of the jet. “N-no way!”
“GONNA TAKE IT RIGHT INTO THE DAAAANGER ZOOONE!” Starlight sang as she finally hit mach speed, breaking through the sound barrier and blasting Rainbow Dash backwards. You stopped singing as you had to brace yourself further, the stabilization magic not doing the best job in maintaining the G-forces. But Starlight? She was just singing along with the song as the jet went faster and faster and even faster still.
You could now tell the speed you were going at was extremely intense, you didn’t have to look down to see how fast you were passing everything up. Were you at mach two at this point? You couldn’t tell, you were doing everything in your power to maintain your composure.
“Aw, the song is over. Anon, put it on again! C’mon, c’mon! That was so awesome and…” Starlight realizes the speed she was going at, and slows things down as she looks back at you. “Anon, are you ok? You’re not going to puke again, are you?”
“I-I’m fine. Oooohhh, I was not expecting that.” You said as you took a few breaths to help center yourself.
“Neither was I. I don’t know what that was, but that song, it just made me feel so amazing, like I could push things even further beyond and… Wait, what’s the condition of the engine? Is it ok?!” Starlight asked, frantic, realizing what she did could have overcharged the dragonstones.
“Oh, uh, the lights are all green. Why are there seven of them though? I thought the dragonstone was the thing we had to be worried about.” You asked.
“Oh, that. There’s actually seven stones in use right now. The one Spike breathed on is basically the ‘main reactor’, feeding its heat down to the other six stones. It’s how we’re able to move so fast.” Starlight explained.
“Seven? Ok… What would happen then, if all seven went critical?” You asked, worried about what the consequences would be, despite the fact you had your horn.
“Er, well, we’d probably be vaporized. But it’s ok, because we have your horn. So, uh, speaking of. What spell do you have in mind to make sure the dragonstones don’t explode?” Starlight asked as she maintained speeds a little past mach one.
“I… Don’t know, actually. Given it’s chaos magic, I’d have to make sure the spell is unpredictable or ridiculous or something like that. And I don’t think summoning a fire extinguisher with legs is good enough.” Oh boy, you probably should have given that part a little more thought, given a foul up would apparently ‘vaporize’ you.
“Magical troubleshooting book.” Starlight said as she began to dip downwards, gently, towards the ground.
“Magical troubleshooting book?” Wut?
“Yeah. A troubleshooting manual you can use to make adjustments you’d not normally be able to make. Not only would that be useful, but we should be able to try a lot of things to cool the stones down without using another charge.” Starlight said, before letting out a chuckle. “Good idea, huh?”
“Er, yeah, actually. Let me just…” And just like that, you had a magical troubleshooting manual with many blank pages you could use to implant suggestions. “There we go. This should work perfectly. How did you even think of something like this so fast?”
“Do you remember Discord’s clones?” Starlight asked
“Ew, yeah, especially One. Wait, why?” Why did she mention them?
“Well, One was pretty serious about treating me as the end all, be all of everything. He gave me a small crash course on how chaos magic works. I guess he thought I was going to become some queen of chaos or something. Anyhoo-” But you interrupt with raucous laughter, gaining the ire of Starlight. “What’s so funny?”
“Just, you, as a queen of chaos. That’s hilarious. You’re way too frantic for something like that. Like, there’s just no way.” You say, still chuckling at the thought. “The worst you’d do is probably-” But this time she cuts you off, as she answers with the ‘worst’ she’d do.
“Create a world without cutie marks whatsoever? Chucking ponies into other dimensions on a whim? How about turning you into a snake so I can wear you around my neck like some evil comic book villain? Oh, I could fly around on a giant kite, shooting lasers down on all those who defy me. How does that sound?” Starlight said, before letting out a little chuckle herself. “Or I could just play that song again at my leisure.” She then suddenly then sounded rather serious, and insulted over your previous words. “Or do you want me to think of something even worse?”
“Woah, ok, ok. I didn’t mean to insult you. I didn’t even know you were that sensitive about it. What, are you that interested in chaos magic?” You asked, trying to be more cautious with your words.
Starlight sighed. In truth, she was only tense due to Rainbow Dash, the race, and the fact the jet was still a prototype. She didn't want to admit it, but Sunburst's words still irked her. It made her take your words as more of a hurtful insult than it should have been. “No… No. I dunno why I even got mad. Look, forget I said anything and let’s focus on where we are. Actually, hey, look there! The statue! We’re almost there!” Starlight said as she pointed forward.
“Yeah, I s- Geez, Starlight, pull up!” Yeah, you could see it alright, it was coming right at the both of you. Or rather, you both were going straight towards it.
“Yikes!” Starlight pulled up as hard as she could, causing the jet to quickly climb and suddenly spin out of control. “C’mon, c’mon! No, no, no!”
“Agh! Starlight! Shit! Shit! What do we do now?!” You had no idea what to do in this situation, you had half a mind to just teleport you and her out of there.
“Wait! I almost! ALMOST!” The jet slowly came out of a spin as Starlight was able to reverse direction with a wide arcing vertical U-turn. “YEAH! DANGER ZOOOONE! I GOT IT!”
And at that point, you had already felt sick to your stomach. “F-fuck, that was… Wait.” You looked around, seeing that the jet had managed to regain control of itself. “We’re ok? Christ, what in the fucking he-.” You then realized something else, a strange oddity. “That maneuvering. Starlight, don’t take this as an insult or anything, but how in the hell did you get so good at piloting? How did you even learn to pilot this thing?”
“It’s like flying a kite, Anon. Especially the kind of kite you enchant and try moving around with a makeshift flight stick. And…” Suddenly, Starlight nearly hurled herself as she lurched forward “Who am I kidding, that was luck. I didn’t even know if I could get this thing back in my control. I feel sick.”
“Wait, no no. Don’t sell yourself short, that was actually pretty amazing. Just… How did you miss the fact we were heading into that statue?” You asked. She had to have been focusing, right?
“I don’t know. I was just, staring at it, staring at everything really. Everything is nearly a blur when you’re going this fast. It’s kind of mesmerizing, don’t you think?” Starlight asked, still in wonderment at the view, and the speed she was going at.
“Yeah, it actually is. Hmn… Look, I’m not usually the philosophical kind of guy, but I don’t think any of us are ready for this yet. One mistake, one moment of losing focus, and somepony would end up as a fireball. Not to mention the fact that Pegasi can be flying around doing their jobs, we might end up hitting one. You know what I’m saying?” Yeah, you could see why air travel in Equestria couldn’t handle something like this. Pegasi work with clouds, it’d only take one disaster with them, or a plane crash, to have jets banned altogether, given how violent either scenario would end up as.
Starlight was silent, obviously in deep thought. She began to slow the jet some as she took just a little more time to think about it. Finally, she let out a sigh. “Ugh, you’re probably right. All this, and it’d just be too dangerous for anypony or anything that is flying in the air. Could you imagine one of these crashing into Cloudsdale? I’m surprised I was able to fly this far without hitting anything at all… Er, except almost hitting that statue.” Starlight let out a sigh, knowing this was probably as far as she was going to get. “It’s a shame, really. I mean, I’d like to think ponykind could eventually advance enough to handle this kind of technology but…” Starlight stopped, sighed yet again, and shook her head. “Nevermind, let’s just get back to Ponyville.”
“Sorry, Starlight, really. If it makes you feel any better, this really was a great ride. We got past Rainbow Dash, we went in the danger zone, I… puked. And all things considered, you’re an amazing pilot, given this is your first flight.”
Starlight went silent, and blushed out of embarrassment. It actually cheered her up pretty good to hear something like that. “That’s because I’m the GREAT AND POWERFUL STARLIGHT!” Starlight said rather boisterously, in a manner similar to Trixie. She then let out a cheerful giggle. “Haha, I can see why Trixie likes to say that now. Hm, y’know, Anon, since we’re both up here. Can I ask you something?”
“Yeah, sure, what’s up?” Hm, you wondered what she was going to ask.
“Say we did put weapons on this thing, do you think we’d be able to take down any threat? You know, like, a fully powered up Tirek? You think we’d be able to take him down?” Starlight asked, without a hint of hesitation in her voice.
“Probably, would probably turn him into a puddle with the right type of missile. Or we could just crash into him. Heh, Starlight, I thought you didn’t want weapons on this thing.” Nehehe, maybe she liked the idea of it all of a sudden now that the dream is dead.
“I don’t, I was just imagining what would happen if it did have weapons. I dunno, maybe this project can still be salvaged later in the future, I’ll just put this baby in storage and just do some more research on the side, just in case. Could be useful if we ever have to deal with some villain who likes to fly or something. Oh, ah! Anon, how is the engine right now? Still good?” Starlight asked
You looked down at the seven lights and calmly said. “Oh, all seven are flashing yellow.” …………..Wait. “ALL SEVEN ARE FLASHING YELLOW! OH SHIT! I DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW LONG THEY’VE BEEN DOING THAT!”
“W-wait, i-it’s fine!” Starlight said with a shaky voice. “Just pull on the handle about halfway”
“Ok!” You said, gently pulling back on the handle “...What now?”
“The light should be going green right about now.” Starlight said. “The lights weren’t flashing a slow or fast red, so we should be able to-”
“All of them are still flashing yellow, and two are flashing red now.” You say, looking at the warning lights, cutting Starlight off.
“What?! Ok, let me just slow down and enter hover mode. Anon, pull the handle further back, until the red lights turn back to yellow. When we enter hover mode, we should be able to-” But you cut off Starlight yet again.
“All of them are flashing red now, Starlight! Shit, we need to use the book!” You pick it up and flip it onto a blank page, staring at it. “...Uh, what do we say to it? Wait, maybe we should try cooling the stones at two hundred percent power.”
“Doubling the power of the snow and air cooling unit? That could cause the other systems to flash freeze. Hmmm… Do it, but only for ten seconds. That should definitely be enough to cool the stones.” Starlight said as she began to cut the engines, and start up the storm engine for hover mode.
“On it. Hey book, do that thing Starlight just said!” And as you said that, the book began to write upon itself the same words Starlight spoke, as the air in the jet began to chill around you and Starlight. “Ooooh, I can feel it.”
“Me too, just give it some time. Aannnd… Mngh!” The jet began to shake, Starlight doing her best to keep it steady as the Storm Engine began to sputter some. “Come on, don’t freeze over! And! And! Ha! Ten seconds, and we’re still in the air! How are all the lights now, Anon?”
You gulped. “All red, still blinking slow.”
“What?! That can’t be! We should have been able to cool down the stones!” Starlight yelped “We can’t let this jet blow up! There’s still more we can do with it!” Yeah, Starlight wasn’t willing to actually let go of the jet. All that hard work, all that studying, to lose it all to an explosion? She wouldn’t let it happen.
“I got an idea!” You yelled out as you looked upon the book. “Book, double the energy capacity of the stones!”
The book began to write upon itself once more. But the lights still flashed red for some reason. It confused you. You went to look at what the book had written, and it had said ‘That is physically impossible. Please suggest a more viable solution.’
“What?! SUGGEST A MORE VIABLE SOLUTION?! YOU’RE A FUCKING MAGICALLY CREATED BOOK OF PROBLEM SOLVING! SO FUCKING DO IT!” You yelled back at the book.
‘And you’re an angry and sad little colt with libido issues and inability to solve your own problems. Oh, also, when was the last time you brushed? You smell like poop’ the book wrote back.
“SMELL?! HOW CAN YOU SMELL ME WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE A NOSE! AND LIBIDO ISSUES?! HOW ABOUT I CUM ALL OVER YOUR PAGES?! THEN WE’LL SEE WHO HAS LIBIDO ISSUES!” You yelled back.
‘Wow, you even find a book attractive enough to cum to? Like, a book without any actual erotica in it? How sad are you? I bet you’d cum to the letter ‘B’ because it looks like a set of boobs’ The book wrote back.
“GRAAAGH! I’LL SHOW YOU! YAGH!” You start trying to tear the book apart, trying to rip apart its pages or rip it from its spine. But nothing you tried was doing anything to it.
“Anon! STOP ARGUING WITH THE BOOK AND FOCUS!” Starlight yelled back at you.
“Wha?! Fuck! FUCK! I didn’t-” But Starlight cut you off, she didn’t have time for these shenanigans.
“Forget it! I didn’t know the book was going to have limitations either. But this idea should work; Tell it to divert all the stone’s pent up energy to the storm engine’s lightning rods. Quick!” Starlight yelled at you as she kept the jet hovering in place.
You didn’t have much time, the lights were flashing quickly now. It was going to explode unless you did something. “Dammit! Fine! Book, divert all the stones’ energy to the lightning rods.”
The book began to copy down your command. It seemed to be working… Almost. While the danger lights went back to yellow, and then stopped flashing altogether, the storm engines began to rev louder and louder, until suddenly…
“GYAH!” Both you and Starlight let out a shout as the hover jets suddenly let out a powerful roar, before shooting out thick bolts of lightning. While you and Starlight couldn’t see beneath the jet, you both could hear the thunder as the hover jets began to melt, fail, and sputter.
“Starlight! The lights, they stopped flashing!” You yelled out, seeing that the lights stopped. But even then, you could feel the jet tilting, and beginning to fall. “W-what’s going on now?!”
“The hover jets failed! I can’t get them to turn back on! We’re going down!” Starlight said as she tried to get the hover jets to restart. “We don’t have enough time to restart the main engines! I have to try to land this thing!”
“Starlight! Forget it, we have to…” Wait, you still had one charge left. Or, wait, you still had the book! “Hold on, I got this! Book, repair the hover jets!”
‘And how do you propose I do that, magic?’ The book wrote upon itself.
“YOU MOTHERFUCKER! YES, MAGIC! WHAT ELSE WOULD YOU USE, DUMBASS!” You yelled back at the book.
‘...’ The book did nothing
“Well?!” You asked, yelling at it.
‘Yeah, I don’t need to take this.’ The book wrote.
Suddenly, for seemingly no reason, the jet stopped in mid air. Did, did Starlight start the Storm Engine? You couldn’t hear it. “Starlight? Did you get the hover jets back on?”
“N-no. A-are we? Did we? Crash?” Starlight asked as she looked forward through the canopy. The ground, you and her were only a few inches away from the ground. “N-no… We just almost did.” Starlight said with a gulp.
In a flash, both you and Starlight suddenly appear outside the jet. When you both looked back, you both saw the book under the jet. It grew hands and legs, put on a felt hat, and opened a bag as the jet magically began to shrink and slip inside.
“Uh… What? Wait, how did you… WAIT! I THOUGHT YOU COULDN’T DO IMPOSSIBLE THINGS!” You yelled at the book.
“Yeah! And what are you doing with my jet?! Give it back, now!” Starlight growled at it as her horn began to glow.
The book just looked back at the both of you, snapped at your direction, and backflipped backwards as a portal opened behind it. The portal then closed as immediately as it had opened.
You and Starlight just stood there, standing in an open meadow, blinking, not fully registering what just happened.
“Did… Did we just get hoodwinked by a fucking book?” You asked, your voice low, your soul itself defeated.
“We got hoodwinked by a fucking book…” Starlight said as she fell flat onto the grass, her face right into the dirt.. “And he took my fucking jet.”