//------------------------------// // Chapter 5 - Never Volunteer // Story: Rules for Bodyguards // by ShiningBeacon //------------------------------// The Ambassador was a whirlwind of activity as the crew made preparations for the evening's festivities. From his vantage point, Shining Armor could see and hear the excited chatter of the soldiers and sailors as they speculated on the activities planned for the evening. As it had been sanctioned for a diplomatic mission with an indeterminate timeframe, it had been stocked with all manner of Equestrian party favors and cultural commodities. This included several types of musical bands on staff at the embassy, part of Equestria’s Cultural Outreach Program. As such, a pair of dueling stages were being hastily built under the fore and aft battlements to accommodate them all, causing no small amount of noise and confusion for the rest of the crew. Above him pegasi attached streamers to the masts, and unicorns were casting additional safety enchantments to prevent fire and falling hazards from endangering anyone who might somehow have drank more than their strictly rationed portion of spirits. With a heavy sigh he left the deck and headed down to Barrel Roll’s stateroom. Positioned as it was the head of the ship, it took a bit of maneuvering and dodging to make it across, and more than once he wished he’d taken the opportunity to learn teleportation from Twilight before she’d thrown herself into her magical studies full-time. These days, their correspondence tended to be more one-sided, but he still saw her occasionally at family dinners or while he was patrolling the city. As he knocked on Barrel Roll’s door, he made a mental note to ask her to teach him sometime. “Enter,” came a muffled voice from the other side of the paneling. Inside Shining Armor found Barrel Roll hunched over his desk, quill in mouth, with a dozen or so pages stacked next to him. “What are you working on?” Shining Armor asked as he looked over his shoulder. Barrel Roll set down his quill and sighed. “Seven of our wounded died during the night. I was writing letters to their families to inform them.” “Oh.” With a pang of guilt, Shining Armor realized he’d never considered visiting the infirmary since no one who had been hurt had technically been under his command. “I’m sorry.” “Yeah, me too.” Barrel Roll pushed back from his desk and stretched his wings, then looked at Shining. “Cadance was down there all day, talking to the wounded and helping the doctors however she could. She was trying to hide it, but I could tell she was pretty upset to see how many injured there were.” “It's no wonder, she holds herself personally responsible for their well-being. She’s never been in battle before, it’s a miracle she wasn't injured herself considering how recklessly she acted,” Shining Armor said darkly. “If she hadn’t, we could have a lot more than seven dead right now,” Barrel Roll reminded him, “and besides, she wasn’t hurt, so no harm, no foul, right?” Shining Armor shook his head. “The whole reason I’m here is to shield her from unnecessary risks, Barrel, and yesterday I failed miserably. If I can’t even keep her safe on a ship surrounded by her faithful subjects, how am I going to protect her in Roam?” “She wasn’t safe on the ship for reasons that had nothing to do with you, Shiny. Once those ships picked up on our trail, the battle was inevitable. What matters is that we made it through.” He didn’t have anything to say to that. Even though he knew Barrel Roll was correct, he still felt like a failure. “Did we learn anything about the pirates?” “A little,” Barrel Roll said cryptically. “Close the door and I’ll tell you what we know.” The door swung shut and Shining Armor pulled up one of the sitting cushions tossed around the room. “I had one of our scouts recover a flag from one of the destroyed masts that had fallen into the water during the battle. We sketched it and sent it in with our after-action report.” Barrel Roll opened a drawer and pulled out a slip of paper. Unfolding it he revealed a rough drawing of one of the flags that had flown from the enemy masts the previous day. “We found a match in the records in Canterlot. The flag is identical to a battle flag flown by the Sons of Sodam, a mercenary group operating out of Klugetown.” “Mercenaries? What were a bunch of Mercenaries doing off the coast of Equestira? Had they turned to piracy?” “Not the last we’ve heard, but they're not exactly a priority for our intelligence network. What's also interesting is that the group never exceeds 750 members.” “So we encountered all of them.” “It would seem that way.” Shining Armor considered this new information. Mercenary groups going rogue wasn't exactly unheard of, but for such a large group to suddenly take up piracy was sure draw attention. “So, a large band of mercenaries takes to piracy, and the first ship they come across is the Ambassador? Seems very... Coincidental.” Barrel Roll nodded. “That was my assessment as well.” “Do we have a list of their cliental?” “Not yet. Intelligence is working on it.” They sat in silence for a brief time, then Shining Armor spoke up. “So, assume this was planned in advance. What was the goal? To stop the Ambassador? Attack Cadance when she was away from Canterlot?” Barrel Roll shrugged. “it could be both. Or neither, we don’t really have anything to go off of yet.” “Well, whoever it is, they knew exactly where to find us. The exact time and date of our departure was kept hidden from the public, so not only did they know when we were leaving, but our route and expected speed as well.” Barrel Rolls’s eye’s widened. “That means-” Shining nodded. “Someone with access to the mission details, maybe even aboard this ship, is a spy.” The noise coming from the main deck was incredible, if not anything Shining Armor would describe as ‘pleasant’. Apparently, someone had taken the idea of a “battle of the bands” a little too literally, and so had put two different bands onstage together, playing at the exact same time. Worse, that someone had noticed the discrepancy in maximum potential noise level between the groups’ instruments and had taken it upon themselves to rig up magical speakers for the disadvantaged party. The resulting mixture produced a musical equivalent to what Shining imagined he would see if he taped a pair of kaleidoscopes to his face and rode the Wonderbolts themed roller-coaster at Equestrian Land. Then again, how many could say that they knew what a mariachi orchestra playing at the same volume as a death metal band sounded like? “Not exactly Countess Coloratura, is it?” Sergeant Stonewall muttered. “Beats that one-pony band that was onstage earlier, you ask me.” pipped up Corporal Trip Wire, one of the unicorns in the bodyguard. “That guy wasn’t even trying to make music, he just wanted to see how long they’d let him get away with it.” “I didn’t think it was bad, Trip,” The pretty orange pegasus next to him said defensively, “And besides, it's always so interesting to watch those types of performances.” “We ain’t supposed to be watching the performances, Corporal Lock,” Stone Wall growled. “We’re supposed to be watching for that fleet.” “The same one we left broken and running for the nearest bolt hole? That fleet?” Corporal Storm Front said sarcastically. The longest serving of the pegasi on the bodyguard, indeed, of any in his unit, Shining Armor had wondered how she had managed to remain only a corporal for her entire career. Or rather, he had till he had actually spoken to her. When he found time to properly introduce himself to the rest of the guards, she shown herself to be extremely resistant to answering his questions, bordering on insubordination. In the days following she made only a token effort to hid her contempt for him and his rapid climb through the ranks of the Royal Guard, commenting about “rookie mistakes” and “the wisdom of experience” anytime he’d slipped up or asked a question, even if the question was justified. Nor had it escaped his notice that the other two pegasi were considerably more relaxed when she was absent. In truth, he was beginning to wonder if she had been put in the bodyguard just to get her out of Canterlot. “That fleet still had enough combat effectiveness to threaten this ship if they had a mind to attack,” Shining Armor said in a low voice. “Until we’re certain we aren’t being tailed, we’ll maintain extra watchers at night.” He heard Storm Front mutter something under her breath, and Stone Wall gave her a look of warning. “Care to repeat that aloud, Corporal?” Strom Front stiffened reflexively, her jaw working for a few seconds before she spoke. “I said this is a load of horseshit, Sir.” No one so much as breathed. After a few seconds of silence, she decided to expand on her answer. “We fought in the battle too. We have just as much right to celebrate our victory as anybody. If anything, the civies should be up here staring at the ocean while we drink, not the other way round.” No one moved a muscle as Shining Armor considered his response. Someone had finally ended the racket from the music stages, the sudden quiet adding to the tension in the air. For a minute he considered the various punishments he could met out, but none seemed quite appropriate to the situation. So, he settled on a different solution; He would explain himself. “Why are we here, Corporal? Not here...” he stomped his foot for emphasis, “what is our purpose on this mission?” She hesitated, “Sir... we’re the bodyguard, Sir.” “Correct. And as the bodyguard it our duty to protect the princess at all costs, correct?” “Yes, Sir.” “So explain to me, Corporal, how allowing the Princess to charge into battle is consistent with that duty?” “It isn’t, Sir.” “No, it is not.” He began to pace in front of the four guards, not looking at them the same way his instructors used to during their lectures. “Ambassador won a great victory yesterday, it is true. We, however, failed in our mission. We let the Princess expose herself to the perils of war to save ourselves. It may have been successful, but it should not have happened regardless. That is why I volunteered this unit for the watch while our comrades celebrate. Am I understood?” “YES SIR!” they cried in one voice. “Good. Now, back to your posts.” The music began to pick up again, this time a single band playing to the tune of one of the bouncy songs that had become popular in the last decade. A wild cheer rang out, and Shining Armor glanced over to see Cadance walking on the deck, adorned with her crown and a very tasteful selection of jewelry. Around her ponies cheered for the hero of evening. She stopped in the middle of the crowd and held out her wings to call for silence. When the cheering stopped she began to address them. Shining Armor tuned away from the scene, trying to hear what she was saying. Unfortunately, she wasn’t using her magic to amplify her speech, colloquially known as the Canterlot voice, and the wind carried her words away, so he only caught snippets of her speech. He thought he heard his name mentioned once, but it wasn’t clear, and if she had the crowd didn’t react to it. Eventually she finished and the Ambassador cheered once again. The music picked up, and the party resumed. With an air of finality he moved away from the railing towards the center of the battlement. After scanning the horizon with his binoculars for the umpteenth time, he put them back into his pocket with a sigh and stared into the ocean. Privately, he had to admit that it was unlikely that the fleet would pursue them again, but Barrel Roll and he had agreed that the risk was there, and so the watch would be maintained. He stood alone, listening to the sounds of the ocean for some time before he noticed Corporal Trip Wire standing behind him. “Can I help you, Corporal?” Trip Wire stood at attention; his feet rooted firmly to the deck. “Sir, I know you explained to us why we were on watch tonight, and I thought I understood... but I starting thinking about it, and I had a few questions.” Shining Armor turned to look at Trip Wire, bemused by his words. “Was I unclear, Corporal?” “No, Sir! It's not what you said that is confusing me, it's what you did. Sir.” “What did you say to me?!” Shining Armor said incredulously. “I said It's not what you said that is confusing me, it's what you did.” Shining Armor could not have stared more intently if he had possessed Supermare’s heat vision. “Explain.” “Well, Sir, you told us that it was our duty to protect the Princess, and I understood that. And you gave orders to keep her in her stateroom, I got that too. What I can’t understand is that if you were so intent on keeping her there, where she would be safe, then why weren’t you there yourself to keep an eye on her?” Shining Armor blinked, stunned by his subordinate's question. “That’s... My decisions are my own, Corporal!” “Yes sir, I agree. That's why I asked, so you could explain your reasoning. Sir. I’m just an enlisted, I never had a fancy education like you did, so maybe you can dumb it down for me.” Shining Armor was dumbfounded. His reasons for his actions were perfectly obvious! Now if only I could think of them. He opened his mouth to explain his rational, then closed it. Then he opened it again to dismiss the Corporal, only to shut it without having said anything at all. At last, he came up with an explanation. “The situation demanded that I be on deck to assist with the defense of the Ambassador. I did so because that was the best way to keep the Princess safe.” “So, protecting the Ambassador is the same as protecting the Princess, then?” “Of Course!” “Well, Sir, the Princess acted in defense of the Ambassador as well, so wouldn’t that mean she was merely defending herself?” Shining Armor glared at Trip Wire. “That’s different, and you know it!” “Like I said sir, I'm just a dumb enlisted stallion. I don’t have book smarts like you do. All I’m hearing is that defending the princess means defending the ship she and everyone else depends on to reach land, but her defending the ship is bad. Is that right? Sir?” “Yes! No! Look, it's not that simple!” “Of course, it isn’t. Sir. I’m probably mangling your reasons all up, aren't I? That’s okay, Sir. I’ll leave you be.” Shining Armor tuned away, glad to be done with the conversation. Something started to bother him, but he couldn’t put his hoof on it. He looked behind him again, and to his dismay, Corporal Trip Wire was still standing in attention. “You’re dismissed, Corporal.” “Yes, Sir, begging your pardon, Sir, I just had another question.” He groaned and rubbed the side of his head. “What is it now?” “Well, Sir, I was happy with the answers you gave me, but then I realized that the reason we were here and not joining everyone else was because we failed to do our duty like you said. Sir. So, to ensure we don’t fail again, I thought you could explain to us, all proper like, how to keep the second most powerful being in the world confined to her room. Sir.” To his immense credit, Trip Wire had kept a straight face throughout the whole ordeal. It didn’t matter to Shining Armor. He wanted to scream at the Corporal, to bust him down to Private and assign him to the kitchen, to have him scrubbing decks every day for the next twenty years until his back was so messed up his children would walk with a limp. But Shining didn’t, because he was right. Shining Armor had sent six ponies with no spellcasting ability at all to keep one of the most powerful beings in Equestira in her room like a child, all because he was afraid she would shatter like glass if she so much as chipped a hoof. Then, when she had overpowered them and done what she wanted anyways, he’d punished them for it. Anger, fear, and guilt all washed over him like one of the waves beneath them had reached out of the ocean and slapped him down. He took a deep breath, held it till the wave receded, then let it out slowly. “I’m afraid I don't recall reading that in the manual, Corporal. Why don’t I get back to you after I think for a bit?” Corporal Trip Wire saluted his superior and turned to head back to his post. “And Corporal?” Trip wire stopped and looked over his shoulder. “You know I could have you discharged for insubordination, right?” Trip Wire nodded. “Yes, Sir, but that would have been an answer as well, Sir.” Shining Armor watched the pony head back to his station, then walked over to where Corporal Flint Lock was standing watch. “Corporal, would you find Lieutenant Roll and ask him to speak with me when he’s available?” From the battlement, Shining Armor gazed down at the dance party taking place on deck. The general atmosphere had shifted when two stallions had challenged each other to an impromptu dance off. As one had been a sailor and the other a guard, this had immediately forced everyone on board to choose a side. The battle had been hard fought and fraught with drama; ambushes, surprise dance numbers and betrayals where the ruling order of the night. Finally, when tensions had reached a breaking point and Shining had been worried about an actual fight breaking out, Cadance had stepped in to calm the waters and bring unity to the Ambassador once again. Now she was in the thick of it, leading the crew through song after song, the slightest sheen of sweat starting to form in her mane and tail. Shining Armor did his upmost not to notice her rump as it swung and bounced in perfect time to the music, but from here he had a perfect view of the dance floor and he kept catching himself watching the Princess a little too long to be considered appropriate for one of her guards. He became aware of a presence next to him and turned to see Strom Front sitting on the banister, a tankard of rum in each hoof. From the looks of it, she was working on both at once. “Corporal,” he said stiffly. “Sir.” “What are you doing up here?” “Well...” she rocked back and forth of the railing, using her wings in an amazing display of balance, “I was down there chatting up this cute stallion I bumped into...he’s a sailor, no worries... and I got that funny feeling of being watched, so I looked up and here you were. So really, I should be asking you what are you doing here? We were relieved almost an hour ago, have you been up here the whole time?” Shining Armor sighed. “I have.” “How come?” He hesitated for a moment, then dipped his head. “I acted... inappropriately yesterday, volunteering you all for watch duty to keep you away from the celebration. I was feeling inadequate as a soldier and I took it out on you all, and for that I am sorry.” Her eyes widened slightly at the apology, and for a while they both were quiet, watching the mass of bodies flowing to the rhythm of the music. “I guess we did kinda screw up,” she said quietly. Shining Armor shook his head. “No, the fault is mine. I gave you all an impossible task and then blamed everyone but myself when it didn’t work out. A mentor of mine once told me ‘Ask the impossible of your troops and they will never fail to surprise. Demand the impossible of them, and they will never fail to disappoint.’ I forgot those words till today. I won’t do it again.” “Well, whoever they are, I like them,” Storm Front said cheerily, “I wish that saying had gotten around more, I could’ve used some less demanding commanders over the years.” “Couldn’t we all,” he chuckled. They watched the dancing some more, Shining once again chiding his eyes for wandering towards Cadance. “She can really move,” Strom Front said admiringly, nodding to her. “Yeah.” That was all he could think to say. He knew he should’ve felt guilty for looking at a mare other than Picture, but he'd been feeling guilty for a while now, and he just couldn’t find it in him to feel any worse about himself then he already did. I’ll have plenty of time to feel bad about it tomorrow. “You should get back to the party, you’re missing out on the fun.” She considered it for about half a second, then shrugged. “Eh, I just wanted a drink. I’m all good right here.” They didn’t talk for the rest of the night, which was fine with Shining Armor. He had done a lot of talking today. He still had a lot of thinking to do.