Captain Goodking RETOLD!

by Leondude


Episode Storm King - Chapter 1

It was another lovely day in Chaosville. You know, if an eldritch location filled with incomprehensible nonsense could be considered 'lovely'. Discord was busy in his house untidying the place. He recently acquired a vacuum cleaner that made the floor even dustier rather than cleaner. When the vacuum blasted a cloud of dust in his face, he covered his eyes and coughed like he had been used as living chimney sweep. And given his slender body, it wouldn't be out of the question to say he had actually been used as a chimney sweep at least once in his life. He heard a ring at the doorbell.

"Who could that be?" Discord asked himself.

"Why don't you go answer it?" Another Discord that came down from the ceiling said.

Discord snapped his fingers to make the other him disappear. He opened the door and was greeted to the sight of one Princess Luna.

"Ah, Luna," Discord said while giving a bow, "So, what do I owe the royal pleasure?"

"Celestia has tasked you with bringing the Storm King back to life," Luna replied.

Discord's eyes widen in surprised and he shot back up, "Pardon?"

"That was my exact reaction when she told me the same thing," Luna replied, "Apparently, she thinks he could be of use to us."

"The Storm King?" Discord asked as he tried to comprehend Celestia's decision, "As in the same Storm King that nearly sucked up all of Equestria in a big tornado?"

"The very same, apparently," Luna replied "Speaking of which, where were you when the Storm King attacked us?"

"I was busy!" Discord replied defensively.

"Doing?" Luna raised an eyebrow.

Discord showed Luna the inside of his house, which was now covered in dust, bread crumbs, and chocolate stains.

"Equestria was in danger and you were busy spring cleaning?!" Luna asked in disbelief.

"Actually, I was spring dirtying," Discord corrected her, "Got to make my humble abode as disorganized as possible, you know."

"Why am not surprised?" Luna deadpanned, "So, when would be a good time for you to resurrect a well-known tyrant?"


It was night-time within the Everfree Forest, the perfect time and the perfect place to do a bit of necromancy. Luna and Discord entered the Everfree Forest with a bag full of what appears to be the shattered parts of the Storm King, whose head was frozen in fear.

"How did Celestia know I used to be a necromancer?" Discord asked.

"I haven't the slightest clue," Luna replied, "But given your ability to rip the fabric of reality at will, it would be easy to assume that includes bringing individuals back from the dead."

Discord shrugged, "Fair enough. Now that makes me wonder why Cay-Cay, that's what I call Celestia by the way, would go to all this trouble when she could easily ask me to deal with whatever's threatening Equestria at the moment. My magic is natural while the Storm King needed that stupid staff."

Luna glared at Discord, "Need I remind you that you prioritized making your own house a mess over saving Equestria?"

"And need I remind you that I saved all of Equestria after you and your sister got kidnapped by changelings," Discord pointed out.

"In our defence," Luna said, "I was asleep at the time and Celestia regularly held back against her enemies due to a pathological feeling that she lives in a world of cardboard. Very flammable cardboard. In any other circumstance, we would have defeated the changelings ourselves."

Discord chuckled, "Well, that explains why she has a bigger Machiavellian streak than I do."

After much travelling, Discord stopped and carved a rune into the ground, "You know, I once used this type of magic to make a group of skeletons to a little jig. Better than zombies doing it, I promise you that."

Luna gave an odd look at Discord, "Don't you think it's a bit disrespectful to defile the departed like that?"

"Not really," Discord replied, "They were glad to be alive for just one night. Besides, it was better than what you did on your first Nightmare Night."

Luna sighed as she put her hoof to her forehead, "Don't remind me."

Discord dispersed the pieces of the Storm King and stretched out his arms. He chanted in the old Equestrian tongue as the Storm King's remains were surrounded by arcane energy. The remains floated in the air as Discord's chanting grew louder. And in a flash of light, the remains stuck together and transformed into a familiar foe. Storm King landed onto the floor. And since he was very unhappy at the moment, he decided to finish what he started. And by that, I mean finish the last sentence he ever spoke before his death.

"You-"