//------------------------------// // Chapter 199: What We Learn Amongst Ourselves // Story: A Journey Beyond Sanity // by Darkwing Dust //------------------------------// Maybe I shouldn't have acted in haste; departing from the human world swiftly, so soon after the revelation that two new variations of myself would be wandering about back there. Perhaps I could've lingered a little longer, taking residence at Sunset's place in the spare time of teaching both that shorter me and the beardless me - if he ever woke up - more about the universe and they were in for, and all the horrors such a generic, utterly drivel and spineless world they would be doomed to reside in for all eternity. Perhaps just for the exasperated features of those girls' faces. Anything, honestly, to have avoided this particular confrontation. "Oh hey Stardust!" Pinkie, as always, blissfully optimistic in spite of the current predicament I and my Princess have found ourselves in. Immediately just as I stepped out of the portal and back into the familiar, proper home of modest royalty. Talking of modest, guess where the lavender alicorn was the moment I popped out of the mirror? Right in front of me! Along with the rest of the Mane Six... In the library... In a disorganized state I'd dare call an unpleasant Sunday. Or whatever day of the week it was. So, in regards to how off-putting awkward and baffling this situation was, I reacted in the most natural way I knew of. Blurting out questions bordering on snark. "Why do you six look like [BEEP]? Why are you six looking like [BEEP] in the library? Can I not leave this world for five minutes? And, most of all, why does Starlight look ready to stuff a kite up my-?" "Because 'Starlight' could have used your help a few moments prior to your oh-so timely arrival. And yesterday, for that matter." The pink unicorn, exuding more anger and annoyance than shyly-looking-away Twilight should be at this moment, strode up with purpose to prod my chest with a displeased frown. "The one time I could have used your help in patching things over with Discord much quicker, instead of all the chaos that led up to that." Discord? Was he the reason why the Mane Six appeared like disheveled equines? Couldn't see or sense him around... Then again, that clown's signature was practically impossible to trace even through Balance. The benefits of being most a physical incarnation of chaotic magic. That was then Pinkie perked up in earnest confusion. "But I thought chaos was Discord's thing?" Taking the words I was about to respond with, albeit in a more innocent fashion, eliciting the wry groans of several friends. Instead, I opted to glance cautiously at Twilight, whom was staring at any close bookshelf rather than myself. Inside her heart... Yeah, not good. My lips curled, more focused on what the alicorn was feeling rather the disgruntled Starlight and rest of the mares. But that didn't stop Rainbow from pitching in next. "In answer to your question why we look like we went through a Wonderbolts training drill... For a thousand times... With no breaks... Discord thought it was funny to send us on some bogus friendship mission far far away, just so he can have some fun with the school!" Friends shared that exasperated irritation. "A gesture I shall not bear enduring through again, thank you very much." Rarity huffed, rubbing herself off with a towel still in hopes of removing the latest 'additions.' Branches, mud, you name it. "Which is why we are searching for any spell that would cease that troublemaking draconequus from messing around with the map again, together, since we are all in agreement we'd rather never be subjected by a tedious, childish prank that would ruin our most wondrous manes!" Yours most of all, I imagined, oh fashionista? My brows raised, lips twitching somewhat from hearing this most recent tale. Shame I missed it. Some must have caught my repressed amusement, throwing me dirty, half-heated glares while Starlight grumbled away, resuming work of searching through books since Twilight was too preoccupied to concentrate by the fact her special somepony has returned. Like, what would Starlight have wanted me to do? If it was a school-related matter, I couldn't interfere even if it's to remove a mixed-animal, fun-loving pest. A deal's a deal, and besides, everything seems to have worked out, and Starlight knows better than most how to resolve a problem; she's more commonly mature, knowledgeable and wiser and I'm just standing here attempting desperately not to focus on the real elephant in the room. How could I not, considering our bonded hearts echo one another's emotions? And feeling Twilight's emotions: Apprehension, dread, worry, hesitation, befuddlement and fear. It was hard to concentrate on anything else, hazel eyes never lingering from the lavender alicorn, whom, once for a split-second, glanced my way, immediately whirled her head around to face her back against me, the sound of grit teeth. "A month." What? Following my sensed confusion as such with a strained sigh of trepidation and uncertainty. "It's been a month in our time, since you ran away again." Ow, my chest with the sensation of being burned internal. My body stiffened. "Twi-" This time, for once, the Princess refusing to hear the rest of her name by my lips, swiftly leaving the room once the doors flung open when an eager Spike jogged in, rolled-up letter in claw. "Look, Princess Celestia sent a... Mom...!" But Twilight only spared him a brief glance and pause, before hurriedly proceeding out of the library in a purple flash, the sound of tension-filled, lingering silence after that rushed departure. ... ... ... Pinkie summed it up best. "Awwwwwwwwkward...~" Gulping unsurely, the young purple and green dragon found it in himself to hastily approach once spotting me. "A-Anyway." Forcing a wide grin while holding out the opened parchment. "It's a letter from Princess Celestia, to you Dad! Welcome home, by the way." "Cheers Spike..." I murmured wearily once accepting the dark yellow paper, aiming to just read whatever that impotent ruler wanted this time and get back to trying to solve things with Twilight quickly. Until I read the full contents, that was, and failed to suppress a groan of my own indignant impatience. Wonderful, a consultation request of all things, in Canterlot! God only knows what Celestia desired this time, just to waste MY time. "What do you MEAN you didn't send any letter?!" The rabbit hole that was this bull[BEEP] grating on my nerves moreso than it should. This day was already getting worse and worse, and I only just got back home! "I have the letter right here!" Magically grasping the parchment from my own, floating it over to the throne, the oh-so wise Princess and her quiet sibling scanned through the contents of the request. Followed just by a casual shake of the head. "My apologies, Stardust, but I have no recollection of ever requesting your presence this afternoon." But, the handwriting... Hoofwriting was unmistakable! Even for I, a human! Unless someone deliberately wrote the fake message to lure me away from Ponyville and friends. But who would have the right incentive to? Chrysalis? Yet whoever sent it knew I came back just at the right... Moment... That... Conniving [BEEP]ing draconequus... "Luna, should you ever breach my dreams again, remind me to staple Discord on Fluttershy's bedroom floor and offer him as her new rug." That said, I turned around, more than prepared to go right back home and scream into my pillow. "Good day, your Highnesses." Barely two steps to the gigantic doors of the overly compensating, but somewhat impressive interior of a restored throne room, that the older sister soon called out in that tedious knowing voice. "Perhaps Discord thought it best to deceive by good intent." A major scoff was the more expected answer. What benefit would anyone have by Discord's trolling? Another scarce few more steps towards the pink doors, when the Princess of the Sun followed her words with, "After all, tensions are high between yourself and my former student, aren't they?" Features clenched, whirling right back around to face the two old alicorns at the other far side of the room, glaring in heated irritation. No, this was none of their concern! "How could you possible know when Twilight doesn't like sharing her problems, and the two don't even you keep in regular contact as you use to?" Celestia then looked the most closest to smug I have ever seen on the white alicorn's equine face. "I have my own reliable sources when the need arises." "...Luna's been seeing her dreams, hasn't she?" Said Princess coughed hastily into her light blue horseshoe, while the elder sister had the decency to look more readily composed, gently descending the small step which led up to the few thrones. Oh fantastic, what gimmick was Uselestia going to pull off this time? Was a part of me still salty and wary after the supposed beloved ruler nearly killed me off with some half-arsed plan that had no viable evidence, when looking back at it, constantly, that it would even accomplish anything? Does Rarity like to boast any contributions to the fashion magazine of the week? "No matter the circumstances of these affairs are brought to my attention, I take the matter of my favourite pupil's well-being as a high priority." Because you really have nothing better to do worth your time, since we're being honest. As always, the mentally aged mare was of ridiculous height among her kind, standing above me by some significant feet as aged pink eyes gaze down, neither judging or readable. Probably got that from you, Starswirl. Shame you never taught Celestia how to even rule properly. If we are being sincere, that was never my main responsibility to teach her. Ah, so the parents then. Oblivious as ever to the internal conversation between a human and her old mentor - or perhaps knowing, since writing is pretty inconsistent regarding what precisely this Princess was capable of - Celestia hummed lightly, before gently brushing past me. "You may feel ready to work things out with Twilight now, Stardust... But for Twilight, it may still be too soon... Or perhaps, too late?" Hold up, what now? My hazel eyes widened, quickly following Celestia's stance to the doors as my muzzle opened reflexively, uncaring by the near panic it reached on that very proposal. "What do you mean? What do you know?" No answer at first, save for the massive doors creaking open, royal guards out and in standing at ready. Waiting until the large wood parted fully, that expression on the Princess' face merely resembled that close to solemn. "Come." I glanced warily back at the observing Luna, the Princess of the Night betraying no expression as she stayed behind in the throne room. And I found myself following Celestia's simple command, to wherever and whatever it was the Princess needed for me to see. Damn... I've nearly forgotten how bad this all was... "Progress has been made steadily, but it won't be long until everything has returned as it once was." The Princess whom I accompanied stated with the utmost of callous confidence, the pair of us walking down the town that was recovering from the vicious onslaught of the Storm King, and the parting gift by Zagreus. Buildings being repaired, stone pathways renewed. Grass and flowers re-planted, statues becoming properly restored. I was halfway to blaming myself again for the damages caused here from the battle against the very force of imbalance itself, but I think enough people have grown sick and weary of me constantly putting myself down. Except the sickos who thrive in it, but why should I judge? The Princess of the Sun continued speaking as we passed through the busying afternoon, her pink eyes gazing on surroundings with small friendly nods to the ponies hard at work, committed utterly in restoring their home. "The real challenge came in the form of fixing the mountain above Canterlot." A ghost of a smile on Celestia's muzzle, voice tinged with amusement. "That was quite a week of effort, moreso than any obstacle I've faced in three hundred years." However do you not get bored, I wonder? Regardless, I said nothing, more intent on whatever Celestia had to say next which was particularly relevant in our beginning discussion just inside the massive castle earlier. Where the exterior, no shocks at all, looked far more cleaner and completely renewed than the rest of the repairing kingdom. Of course, fix Celestia's [BEEP] first! Nothing else mattered more than to make your idols look good, huh?! Twilight had insisted in the past for her and friends to help Celestia and Luna restore Canterlot. Myself opting to assist two. But these mares, for some reason, had put their hoofs down and ordered for us to continue relaxing back in Ponyville, not to fret about something those siblings claimed they could easily handle by themselves. Guess blind stubbornness is a common occurrence of a trait among royalty in Equestria. "The fact that, whether you are making snark remarks or crude commentary, moreso in your mind rather than outwardly, is rather refreshing and displays maturity." Celestia half-joked, smiling pleasantly with scarcely a side-glance. I wasn't smiling, or laughing. Nor was I even agreeing. Mature? What was even the meaning of that word anymore? The Princess of Day then sighed lightly, finally getting to the point of before. "I know it's hard to imagine someone so close to be imperfect, Stardust. Even I had fooled myself sometimes, regarding Twilight to be the perfect pupil who could achieve no wrong... But I suppose that is a sign of my own imperfection, too." We both knew what she was thinking about with those words; the incident with the play. I winced, accepting the point Celestia made, but counteracting a gross assumption this alicorn just made. "It wasn't about thinking Twilight is flawless. Part of those flaws are why I am so endeared to her." Blinking a little for composure, heaving slightly in breath before proceeding in stern assurance. "My issue relied in Twilight failing to learn from past mistakes and almost condemning herself..." Not to mention, our close friends. "Hmm... That sounds like somepony else whom could relate." Was that... Teasing? Because I certainly didn't find it amusing in the least, glaring at the stone ground we walked upon with such an intensity it could burn through the marble. "This is different..." "To be sincere, Stardust, I fail to see how." Yep, teasing all right. I glared up exasperatedly, just yearning for once - for once that this mare would accept anything with just a bit of salt. "She almost put you at war with another species." Did Celestia just shrug, or was that my blinding rage hallucinating things? "That's not the worst mistake a student of mine has committed. You recall Sunset Shimmer?" How could I forget, since I just said goodbye to her about two hours ago! But the tall Princess, as we turned a corner and kept watching our steps for leftover rubble, continued in light tenderness, as though soothing a disgruntled teenager. "Status or rewards, new responsibilities or expectations, no one would simply change altogether. Twilight acted from fear, paranoia, uncertainty and willingness to sacrifice while knowing the damage it would have caused. Just as I would expect from my former, best pupil." What? Bewildered, my head finally snapped up to look intently at the delusional mare, a brow raised upwards in perplexed bafflement. Just what was she uttering about this time? That she expected her best taught student to steal a magical object that was keeping another species safe and happy? "You often expect Twilight not to commit anything you possibly would, nor anticipate any action or reaction that resonates by your own behaviour. The behavior of her trusted and beloved Warrior." A side-glance of pink. "Tell me, why do you earnestly expect Twilight to undertake no decisions you would most likely cause, or presume to cause, in this case?" Just how much was this alicorn aware of? Nevertheless, my answer came into a confessional grumble which consisted, "Because she's suppose to be better than me..." Or, to better phrase it, I want her to be better than me, in every aspect... "...Then perhaps you don't know Twilight as better as you assume." When I looked back up, Celestia had turned away from me against to what's right in front of us, halting in place while I followed the gesture. The Princess of Day soon motioning to what's directly before us with a single, solitary nod. Yeah, the school for gifted unicorns, looking much better than it did last time, when Twilight came for Celestia's approval and tips of the new School of Friendship. That's right, Celestia's a teacher here; a hobby she appeared more content with than ruling an entire nation. Guess we all have to stretch our boredom somewhere after a thousand years, even though that's no excuse for lazy ruling. What were we even doing here, for that matter? My hazel eyes looked curiously to and from the building and the monarch, tilting my head slightly. But Celestia kept quiet, appearing lost in thought, her heart a tranquil place in nostalgia and melancholy. My own heart was sizzled in hopeless confusion. Again, we were here because... Celestia had a class to teach? Nope, didn't look like that, as Celestia finally turned to completely face down at my state, pink eyes reflecting tender lightheartedness, offering a soft smile. "Twilight may have learned plenty about you, Stardust... But do you know everything about Twilight? Has she told you everything she's been through, prior to her days in Ponyville, before meeting the most wondrous of friends anypony could ask for?" "...Only bits and pieces." I murmured admittedly, slowly glancing to the educational facility yet again. Yes, Twilight, since as a filly, was a student here, eager to learn and study any and all aspects of magic, before friendship became the top priority. And because of that, any friends that would have been made were shunned away, in the pursuit of something supposedly better. Celestia's star pupil. But that was just about what I knew. Was Celestia insinuating more answers could be found, here at the old school where it all officially started? Where destiny had fully impacted the young Twilight Sparkle, beginning her steps into who she would become; what that mare was today? Why was any of this even relevant? "This is only the first part to clarity, Stardust." The Princess of the Sun was already moving away, back the direction we came from, as I never took my eyes off the school, feeling something commanding I stayed. Celestia's voice growing more distant with every parting step. "Six steps, and perhaps you will know how you and Twilight are not as apart as believed...Go inside, learn the past to understand the future. There may still be hope for you both." Whether be it curiosity, hope, or desperation guiding my actions that moment, I accepted the plunge to seek the truth Celestia vaguely implied. In all honesty, I had nothing better to do worth my time, and if this helped uncover the truth as to why Twilight would even consider taking the pearl... I needn't look far, for practically barging through the doors led me right into a certain yellow unicorn whom looked like my Twilight's twin. "Stardust Balance?" "I'm surprised you of all ponies, by this point no less, haven't learned more about Twilight's past in better detail." The mare in a hoodie confessed upon our entry into a spare classroom of sorts, summoning stacked papers via magic with a brief skim through each one, multi-tasking. "Then again, suppose she always was a bit seclusive with sharing any personal matters." "Really? She's often open about them to her friends." Okay, the more we conversed during this brief tour of the admittedly impressive facility, the more I was convinced Moondancer was secretly a clone of Twilight, produced by Celestia during the former's childhood so she would have an actual relatable friend. Yeah, that's my headcanon. Because otherwise, I would be forced to accept that Hasbro was just lazy with the recoloured unicorn with nerd glasses shoved on. Certainly, the company has never expressed signs of laziness before, right? Right? "Oh, I imagine there's some details your Princess had more than likely skimmed over to save herself some face. Not that I would blame her, considering Twilight's track record prior to growing up." Moondancer followed that statement with a wry chuckle, those purple eyes reflecting something of remembrance. "She was a right troublemaker in her first weeks here, let me tell you. A real prankster." Whoa now, gonna call bull[BEEP] right there, my brow raised in dubious humour. "Twilight? A prankster?" Moondancer hummed in affirmative. "Mmhm, a right pain in the rear for many of us way back when, just as we were starting fillies eager to learn the many secrets of magic. Twilight, however, often proved to be... Ehh, unique, let's say, among her peers." No kidding? "But Twilight always wanted to join this school when she was a child. It's how she got her cutie mark." Not to mention, the hatching of Spike, so that's two wondrous things that ever happened. "Don't get me wrong." A side-glance from checking her work or whatever. "She was as much enthused and eager to learn, but unlike some, that energetic personality was also spread to playing some juvinile pranks among her fellow students." Moondancer appearing as though she was trying not to grin, but her heart sung otherwise. "There's one certain trick of Twilight's nopony who learned among here would ever forget... Not to mention the poor teacher at the time too." Prankster. Twilight was a prankster as a filly, and played some massive joke that affected her peers and even tutor at the time. Okay, [BEEP] it, I needed to hear this. Quickly grabbing a spare chair and plopping down in my own eagerness, hunched forward slightly and facing the unicorn attentively. Seeing as now she had my complete attention, Moondancer sighed before setting the papers back inside her desk, grinning over to my lightly. Purple eyes sparked in fond recollection. "It was a regular morning, at first, with everypony coming to class on time eager as ever, with Twilight joining in and hiding at the back corner of the class. Presumably, your Princess infiltrated the school the previous night, setting up the prank in question: A stink bomb. A magical stink bomb that smelled differently to each pony unfortunate in range. Know how? The bomb gives off a scent reminiscent of the most appalling, rancid stench imaginable that everypony within vicinity had smelled sometime in their life. Needless to say, the teacher was in for a surprise the moment he opened his desk." Moondancer's smile reflected pure nostalgia, with merely the tiniest glimpse of exasperation. "It didn't take long to work out the perpetrator, after everyone ran out of the classroom coated in the worst smells to ponykind, given who the infamous residential prankster of the school was at the time." While explaining all this, my expression was all but gobsmacked by this startling revelation. Twilight Sparkle; a prankster in her youth, setting up stink bombs. It was a gold mine of tease, when I got home and hopefully patch things up with her. "At least she sounds inventive with her jests." "Oh she was." Moondancer nodded in agreement, smirking. "They were often deliberate, and sometimes, absurdly, convoluted, and she loved every moment of doing them." "So what happened?" I leaned forward some more, almost slipping off the chair with a wide grin. "What changed Twilight from residential jokester, to being a boring neat freak prior to Ponyville?" The second her smile and heart plummeted, as did mine. Something told me this tale wasn't going to end well. "Regrettably, not everypony shared Twilight's enthusiasm for making others laugh and bring some life to the otherwise droll school. It didn't help that Princess Celestia often encouraged said pranks." I snorted there. Of course she did. "Needless to say, some peers had expressed their dissatisfaction the hard way, actively doing all in their power to have Twilight never prank again... Or even smile as much as she used to." My body shivered, taking in those words with a grain of dread. Don't tell me... Twilight was also bullied for playing these jokes. I suppose anyone would get tired of pranks after a while, but physical or vocal abuse wasn't the answer. Unfortunately, foals weren't often in clarity of learning such things, hence, bullying. The mare before, had taken her own seat, watching me lean back slowly with her own faint smile, reflecting anything but happiness. "She only wanted to be different, and make friends her own way..." Moondancer would then express wearily, regarding the floor between us in a flash of sad regret. "Twilight was only young, innocent and unknowing what her jokes would cause in the long run... That all changed, once the student body made their displeasure known." Suddenly, my own mind wandered, taking in its own recollections of the past, body straightening from the very, familiar-sounding comparisons. My own past. Making pranks and jokes. Trying to make friends while begin different in the best way possible. Only to be picked on, mocked and despised by peers for only trying to make people laugh. If Twilight and I were so similar in our lives prior to meeting the rest of those mares, or even each other... I dreaded to think what else we've had in common. "After her pranking days were over, Twilight would be a well-known reclusive filly within the school, shyly avoiding anypony in fear of incurring their wrath." Twinkeshine lightly explained after handing over a nice bottle of soda - though I was barely thirsty in sustenance, moreso in storytelling - upon asking earlier if I liked any refreshments in this small bakery of hers. For free, no less, as was a benefit of being with the very source of our discussion. "While she and Moondancer were partnered up often in classes, it wasn't really a friendship rooted between them. Not yet anyway." Moondancer, once concluding her own tale of Twilight's past days, recommended Twinkleshine for me to seek out next in order to learn more. The white mare with a fabulous pink mane owned a small, modest bakery attached to the side of a book store, when her spare time didn't consist of being a teaching assistant at the School for Gifted Unicorns. Needless to say, I was welcomed with open pony arms. Seems Twinkleshine had a lot to say regarding Twilight herself, just as fondly in these recollections too. "That all changed, however, when I first approached the previously nervous unicorn you now know as a Princess." Once resuming her spot behind the store counter, the bakery itself relatively quiet today, the kind mare smiled cheerfully towards her listening recipient. "I was in need of a study partner; my grades were dropping somewhat since I couldn't really concentrate much as a young filly. And Twilight was known, even back then, for being both studious and inventive, making her the perfect partner." Well, who else would be the best to look to for getting great grades? I grinned jokingly, nodding for Twinkleshine to please continue. Happily, she obliged, checking her pantries of good-scented muffins and gingerbread ponies whilst doing so. "Reluctant as she was, at first, Twilight gradually opened up, being more happy to help the more time we spent together. We often studied at her place, see, since it was practically its own library. I think her parents were thrilled for Twilight to keep bringing home a friend, even if we didn't call ourselves as much out-loud." "How often did Twilight boast about her knowledge during your study times together?" I joked, but then raised a brow of curiosity, when the white unicorn shook her head. Oh? "Twilight was often humble about what she knew, confessing at times she wished she knew more, and had the dream of one day learning everything there was to know." We both chuckled there. Yep, that sounds just what Filly Twilight would say. Twinkleshine grinned cheerfully then. "I think, as time progressed as we became closer, that spark of enthusiasm during her days as a prankster re-ignited from having someone close to her again, her brother aside." Glad to hear it. At least this continuous tale was looking bright again in Twilight's favour. "Thank you, then, Twinkleshine, for being there for Twilight back then." At my sincere gratitude, her smile softened with a nod of acknowledgement. "It was my pleasure. Twilight was a wonderful friend to hang out with, learning so many things about her I never even thought; an artist, for example. So when-" "'Artist?'" I repeated then without meaning to interrupt, just blurted out in surprise. "Sorry, Twilight never mentioned being an artist in her youth." Earlier youth, that was. Was I about to unlock another past secret of Twilight's she never once shared with me? "Oh, you didn't know?" Twinkleshine wasn't offended in the least, blinking innocently. "In her spare time, Twilight often drew some wondrous art of various things! Scenes and depictions from her favourite books, and sometimes teachers and fellow students. Hmhm, you should have seen how many were of her idol and personal mentor, Princess Celestia." Twilight Sparkle. First a prankster, and now an artist. Granted, I always assumed her main form of art was in being adept in magic and organization, now I was realizing there was far more to Twilight's past hobbies than I would dare to presume unfairly. What other past secrets would I learn from this continued endeavor of seeking the past? "Although we often disagreed about the quality of her drawings; I often remarked how amazing they were, but Twilight always put herself down for them, having low self-esteem of being a potential career artist on the side." Twinkleshine's sigh made me gaze more thoroughly to her, those light blue orbs sparkling in their own remembered fondness. "The best drawing, without sounding too egotistical, was the one of me... Us, getting a hypothetical... Oh, excuse me for one second!" Having left me for my thoughts for only a brief time, in search of a relic to the personal past. Twinkleshine would return as quickly as she left, gently placing a ruffled, but comprehensive drawn paper on the counter's surface in-between us, endorsing me to take a gander with her light grin and nod. Carefully, I picked up the item, my own eyes softening by the very childish sight before me. Of two young recognizable fillies, magically holding up their own work. 'A+'s on said papers. Aww! My muzzle twitched, blinking softly while tenderly handing the wondrous, child's drawing back to the young mare. "Please tell me you both got an A plus in the end." "We did." Twinkleshine affirmed, to my relief, before giving off her own sad smile. "It's just a shame that Twilight only distanced herself further, after all of that." Regarding the piece of aged paper in her own solemn nostalgia. ...What happened, Twilight? The prankster days I understood, but what stopped you, love, from pursuing your interest in arts, too? "So you're telling me." I began sourly after taking a seat on the rather small, but comfortable couch, watching the blue unicorn pace back and forth in her own chores. "That Twilight wasn't always just bullied because of being a past prankster." Minuette barely nodded, the third childhood friend of the alicorn's humming thoughtfully for a moment, not really having much spare time to talk as she'd be departing soon for some business in Manehatten. Just having enough time, however, to share her own addition of Twilight's childhood to the tale I sought. "Yeah-huh. She was always considered more eccentric and eager to learn than most." Minuette admitted, barely glancing my way while rushing by, checking something close to the stairs. "Some regularly assumed it was because she was learning under Princess Celestia. Others thought because Twilight wanted to return back to her pranking days, after spending notable time with Twinkleshine." "And others?" "Well..." The unicorn with a blue-and-white shaded mane and tail paused for a brief moment, finally gazing to me unsurely as followed with this next answer, my own chest leaping a little in concern by what her emotions and tone were vocalizing. "Others speculate Twilight was... Different." To that, I blinked, both confused and worried by what was going on with Minuette's behaviour. "I mean, she is... Was Celestia's personal student, naturally more seeking in knowledge and pursuit of magic. Surely that was to be expected?" A shake of the head. "Not just that. I mean, like, different-different." Say what now? My posture tensed, but the unicorn's attention was soon fixed on the clock nearby, huffing lightly. "Going to be late at this rate." I opened my muzzle- "No, thank you, I am perfectly fine packing everything myself." If you say so... "What do you mean by that form of difference? Surely everyone wanted to learn as much magic as possible in that school." "Not to the extent Twilight went through. She devoted so much time to both learning and even showing off her skills with that much enthusiasm, it was starting to make ponies concerned, envious and... Jealous." Minuette flinched for a moment, passing a side-glance of sincere apology. "Hence the bullying..." My mouth set firm, body clenched briefly by another painful comparison between us. Bullied for being different. Granted, that I knew about Twilight being picked on in her young days in school for thus, but it still pained me to hear or be reminded of it. That wonderful mare never deserved such raw jealously and anger thrown against her innocent younger self. An abusive past her human counterpart had also endured, only much, much later. Guess ponies and humans weren't that distinctive in harming those who express more interest in life than others... No matter. Both Twilight's were happy now, in the company of dear, good friends whom love, cherish and value them. That was, at least one Twilight, since another was currently suffering by the ill judgment of a horrendous boyfriend whom only sought to understand her mindset. "Look, you're better off getting more answers from another old friend." Minuette's rather impatient voice startled me out of those darkened thoughts, the blue mare regarding me in both sympathy and resignation. "Try Lemon Hearts; she should be currently helping out in the public library and soon to retire for the day." Afternoon was getting pretty late, thinking about it. "Better her than me, when you hear more about the darker sides of your special somepony's past." A part of me was already dreading as much. And yet, nodding in thanks, I left the blue mare to finish up packing for her trip, intending to solve the rest of my questions before the day was up. No matter the internal harm it would cause upon me. "Are you honestly certain you want to know, from me of all ponies?" Lemon Hearts inquired amongst our shared stroll through the repaired park, walking down a common marble path with uncertain, reluctant eyes. "These are really things you should hear from Twilight herself." "In the event of Twilight never telling me... And the likely but tragic indication she never will..." I sighed, glancing back to the yellow unicorn with a pleading expression, yearning to realize more than ever before at this point. "I have to know. I have to understand some things, and maybe knowing the truth will help bring closure." And clarity... "...As you wish." Lemon soon conceded, after a long period of silent contemplation. "But please, don't say I didn't warn you." Whatever pain will come, I must hear it. Living in ignorance isn't living at all. "So you know that Twilight was often picked on by her peers for being different." "That was as much as Minuette told me, yes." Bracing myself, moreso as Lemon's heart mentally inhaled, preparing herself for the memories to unfold and be shared. "Well, that's only the half-truth." Huh? Lemon would immediately clarify. "It wasn't just the students who expressed their displeasure on Twilight at every possible chance." I almost halted completely in our walk, but something bordering on agony welled up in my being. No, she couldn't possibly be implying that- "Once she started distancing herself from Twinkleshine, for reasons we never really understood. Maybe it was to devote more time with the Princess, or become much better at her grades, we never asked." Lemon sighed wearily. "In any case, the isolation made her a target for jealous students... And teachers alike. Behind her idol's back, of course." Adding once seeing my whirled expression, a faint self-deprecating smile. "There isn't a day I don't look back, wishing I could have helped in some way." "...How?" I gulped, asking the only real, and first question which sprung to mind from this HORRIFIC revelation. Voice bordering to that of cracking by the mere thought of Twilight... Enduring... "How bad was it...?" Her grimace didn't help in learning this history. "Honestly, I admire Twilight's strength in character; she put up with it moreso than I could. Even Moondancer admitted as much. Twilight's passion and enthusiasm, to learn and be the very best at what she does, pushed back the negativity of her peers and mentors. That filly was practically the most strongwilled amongst, despite all the tears, hardships and ruins of her notes and books..." A ghost of a tiny smile. "She was the best among us, even when Twilight never flat-out said it..." ... ... ... Though the reveal that Twilight was better than everyone back then at that school, enduring through the pain and belittlement of her peers since her drive to learn was much stronger, it was still agonizing for my clenched heart to hear. My breathing slowed, as we eventually paused somewhere in the middle of the serene park, remaining debris being removed by workers. More and more, I was becoming afraid of what else I was learning. "Did it ever get any better...?" Lemon's first answer, however, diminished by a slow, regretful shake of the head. "Not until after the worst prank imaginable was pulled on her... Which, we guessed, was petty revenge for her stink bomb gag much, much earlier..." Another glance, unsure and filled with resignation. "Are you certain you want to...?" My expression was enough for confirmation. Did I honestly want to hear the worst prank imaginable inflicted upon Twilight? Not particularly. But again, clarity and closure. I had to understand. The yellow unicorn nodded, finally confessing. "One evening, as ponies were prepared to go home, Twilight stayed behind for some after-school tutoring with the Princess. I don't know much of the details, but apparently, some bullies were waiting outside for her, and they..." I said nothing, letting Lemon take a moment to compose herself after the mare clenched her eyes shut, gathering the courage to continue speaking this tale. The note of bitter, lingering guilt residing in her voice. "We should have known... You may not know, but one of their favourite descriptions for Twilight at the time - in addition to 'freak,' 'spoilsport' and 'nerd' - was 'Celestia's Pet.'" My teeth grinded, limbs shuddering at that painful reminder of my own eerily similar comments to that last name in the past. No wonder she was so defensive... "Anyway, they thought they could coax Twilight to make a name for herself... By stealing the Princess' favourite quill right under her nose, inciting that thievery after they took the young filly's special good luck bracelet that Princess Cadence had made for her at the time, threatening to burn it along with every favourite book of hers unless she did as they asked." Were my eyes going red, or was I just beginning to see red? Lemon took no heed of my trembling state, going on through her story since it was too late to back off now. "As you could imagine, fear is an easy motivator for any child... Twilight managed to take the quill... Only for the bullies to go back on their word and..." Closing her eyes shut tightly, Lemon finally forcing out as my own heart somersaulted in sheer despair. "Frame Twilight for being the sole thief after burning all of her prized valuables." Something inside me snapped, something colder than rage and harsher than emotional pain. The sheer imagery of Twilight... Twilight... Must have gone through during this horrendous, monstrous event... My muzzle parted, unable to form words, unable to think clearly. Unable to state or express anything coherent but the following words in my head, over and over again... I'm sorry... I'm so, so sorry, love... "They were never caught." The news just kept getting WORSE! How was that POSSIBLE?! Lemon sighed in depressed recollection, barely glancing my way. "Twilight's unjust punishment lasted with a whole year of detention... And six months off from being taught by the Princess herself... Needless to say, I'm glad you weren't there to see how devastated she was following that entire year..." ...They were bullies... Just kids... Didn't know any better- No, TWILIGHT was a child! SHE didn't know any better! What could possibly justify-! They were too young, Stardust, too young to see the consequences of their acti- DON'T YOU DARE TAKE THEIR DEFENSE OVER TWILIGHT, JACK-! I NEVER WOULD YOU JUDGMENTAL [BEEP]HAT! I just... This was...! "We tried to help her..." My own eyes, close to tears, were just as misty as the mare before me, whom looked desperately close to tears while implying for forgiveness. "But there wasn't much we could do. We only learned too late, by accident no less, when we overheard a sobbing Twilight confess as much to Princess Cadence at the back of the school one late afternoon..." "I... I don't blame you." I eventually responded, flinching to myself at how... Broken I sounded to my own ears, sighing in tired regret. But that did nothing to soothe Lemon's years of guilt... Or my own. Twilight was forced to make a decision for something that was truly precious to her. To make the choice no one else would dare do. Pressured, afraid, feeling alone and wanting no one else to take the blame for her actions, never once confessing the bullies at fault. For a child, a quill. For an adult, a pearl. ... ... ... And I berated her without thinking it through, just like her teachers of old. I called her names all too close to 'Celestia's Pet,' made fun of her hobbies at times and even judged too harshly, when I was equally guilty as much of these things in the past. Twilight never could do anything she wanted herself. In fact, the mare had no real free will in her whole life than choosing to enroll in that school. Maybe... Just maybe... Twilight always had it worse than me. Starswirl... I need you to tell me, as I took this final journey of uncovering the past, back in Ponyville of all places. What do you need from me, Jack...? You know what... That solemn, tender tone in your voice tells me you've been reading my thought process the whole train ride back home. Because the comparisons between Twilight and I, the hardships and similar truths... They're too coincidental. I have to know, because what I was dwelling on matched her personality too, in regards to traits and her OCDness. The urge to organize, keep things nice and her way. It's too big to think on than to simply ignore. Starswirl... Tell me the truth. ...Twilight Sparkle does not have autism, Jack. These behavioral traits, be they positive, negative or regarded by others as unique, are of her own initial personality, and the influences of a blissful and awful past. ...That, was a relief. Sighing to myself loudly, just as I reached the house. Because that wasn't a fate I wished on anyone. Now, there was one more thing to know, a final matter in my discoveries of twilight's past life by those considered her childhood friends. It was no lie I made to Lemon; I never blamed her or those girls for all the [BEEP] my beloved Twilight had endured through as a child, and perhaps to teenagehood as well. I've learned so much in the span of the day, that the Princess of Friendship was once an artist, a prankster, a loner and shunned for crimes that weren't her own fault. It took this long, THIS long, to finally realize that Twilight never had her own decision of fate. It was sealed the moment she chose to go to that school in Canterlot, to become Celestia's student, and eventually her avatar for the Element of Magic. But consider all the good that has caused, Jack. Doing all this granted her with the reward of having the greatest friends anypony her age could ask for; to learn the sacred magic of friendship, and save so many countless times. Uh-huh, and how many times have the people of this world expressed their gratitude? How many times have they not acted like selfish, self-entitled jerks who slander the six mares for even having a hint of a fault? When Twilight was lashed on by a pony in Manehatten? When they've done so much, and not once, has a pony ever said "Thank you for saving us all?" I sometimes wondered if this world even deserved to be saved. But that wasn't my purpose here. It was time for the final closure. I have heard all the bad aspects of Twilight's past... Now, it's time to relish in the good. Hence, my visit to this common house in Ponyville. Four knocks, and the exact mare I was seeking out answered. Blinking in pleasant surprise, the lime unicorn - the very first of two to introduce me to this world - grinned brightly with an equally happy greeting. "Hi Stardust! You're here late!" True, evening was peeking over the mountains at this point. "I won't try to take up most of your time, Lyra." I smiled, albeit somewhat forced, and incredibly weary. "But I was hoping you could help me with some final answers." "Oh, okay, sure! Bon's out for the moment... Erm..." Quickly grabbing a small note from inside and reading it out-loud. "'Getting muffins of Derpy, in case anypony asks...' Yeah. that!" With the least convincing grin known to ponykind, throwing the card over her green shoulder. "So, whaddaya need?" "Tell me about Twilight's school days." As her amber eyes widened exponentially, I quickly added with a faint, amused smirk. "All the good parts; I've had enough of the bad." Lyra nodded in comprehension. "Ohh okay!" Stepping aside so I may enter. "How about the time she made a giant stink bomb-" "Heard it." "Alright... Oh, what about the time she dyed Princess Celestia, the visiting parents and the entire staff's manes blue during a hall presentation?" "...Okay, THAT is what I need to hear now."