//------------------------------// // Leave of Absence (S3 E18) // Story: Unpleasant Correspondence 2 (My Little Pony: Reign of the Goddess-Queens) // by StormLuna //------------------------------// Dear Mom, As you know, Starlight recently went over my head and ascended that failure protege of mine AND made her a princess. Just like she always outshined me when it came to magic, she is now trying to outshine me when it comes to handling all the duties of a leader. Yes I agreed to it initially but I have gotten sick and tired of only being allowed to handle state dinners and handling festivals outside of having fun with my slaves. I have decided that enough is enough, I'm not going to take it anymore. I have made a decision though. I have decided that I am going to take a temporary leave of absence and see how Starbitch can handle running the country on her own. Since I have infinite powers, I am going to fix your old castle and take my girls with me. I will simply relocate out there for a while and then come back when my bitch sister is running the country into the ground. I will come back, save the day and then the whole country will hate her and love me! I don't know if this will piss you off or not but I honestly don't care. I need some time away and I think this will be the perfect test to see if dad's favorite truly is as wonderful and competent as she thinks she is. Besides, it will be nice to not have to put up with any shit that is beneath me and focus on what is the most important, GETTING LAID! After all, satisfying my extreme appetite for sex is far more important, right? If you need to get in touch, you'll probably have to come and see me since there is no mail delivery to that place and I know that Starlight would never approve any kind of funding to send mail out there. Hell, the only real isolated place she approved mail delivery to is her old village. I tried bringing up that commune of hippies out beyond Hayseed Swamp but she decided that the country would lose too much money on it and suggested private sector delivery services, services that use carrier pigeons service them. You see? Not only is Starlight a bitch who thinks she has to do what would normally be my duty but she is greedy too. Hell she has even brought up defunding public festivals and forcing the rich ponies to pay for them or simply go without. I recently held a festival honoring myself and she refused to show up! She called me a narcissistic bitch and took her daughters on a trip down to Ponyville to help Bright Beam grow into her new role, or so she says. Oh and I do have some good news! I age regressed Miss Mare and added her to my harem. She wasn't thrilled and tries to get out of having to put out but threatening to give her to Colgate fixes that problem every time! Well I just thought I'd write you and let you know what is going on and why I am going to be away from Canterlot for a while. So how long do you think Starbitch will last without me around to keep things running smoothly? I'm going to give her a month, max! Once she fucks up and I have to come back, then I can run the country on my own and she can go off and be completely irrelevant. Anyway, talk to you later. Love, Your Favorite and Most Precious Daughter....Twilight To My Favorite Daughter, You may think I will be upset about this but to be honest, I'm not. I am personally glad that you are doing this. Starlight took away almost all your responsibilities, everything except the most menial and demeaning ones. Those things are beneath you Twilight and I am pretty sure that you will have to return to Canterlot to either help your sister again or simply take over because I know how she is. Somepony will likely piss her off, either one of the wealthy ponies in town or some foreign dignitary and she will start a war. Regarding her defunding public festivals, I personally see nothing wrong with that but I think she is doing this to spite you since you wanted to bring them back. I am going to be honest though, your father and I were really hoping that nothing like this would happen. After your fight and her relegating you to the meaningless duties, I had a feeling this would happen but hey, shit happens. I don't think she will screw things up and cause you to return but I do hope you and her can get along at some point and you will return to Canterlot. I will try and talk to her at some point about this and see if she would be up to at least letting you handle the moon and some economic matters since it seems like she is taking this low spending approach when it comes to governing. I have a feeling that she thinks that if Equestria brings in more revenue than it spends, that maybe I will love her more again but that isn't the case. I do have my concerns that she may even cut off my pension in the name of fiscal responsibility and if she was to do that, I would be very unhappy. Sadly if she was to do that though, there is nothing I could do because of her power and if you tried to intervene, there would be another magic war and I doubt anypony wants that. All I can say for now is have fun with your harem. Now I will write her and let her know that this really bothers me and tell her that she might win some favor back if she does this. Oh, and I am thinking of coming up and seeing you to see what you've done with the place. Love, Mom Dear Starlight, I just got a letter from Twilight and because of you and your "I'm the only one who can do things right" mindset, she has decided to take a leave of absence. Now I am glad that she will be fixing up my old castle but it does bother me that you two got to the point that you can't even live in the same city anymore. I am going to admit, I am very disappointed in you Starlight. I am disappointed that one of my daughters, my favorite one, is now going to have nothing to do with the government. Now if you want to win back some of my love, you will let Twilight have some of her duties back, which includes handling the moon. I also want you to let her have some say over economic matters back and allow her to have say over the nation's education system. You never did care a ton about education and the most you ever did was be the guidance counselor at what was Twilight's school. Back then you were too concerned with Trixie to focus on anything else. If you will give Twilight some meaningful responsibilities back, I might love you as much as I do her again. Love, Mom To my backstabbing mother, Fuck that shit! Twilight tried moving the moon for a while and she never got it done on time and tardiness is unacceptable in my eyes. You want her to have some say in economic matters? Do I need to remind you that she went over my head and restored festivals? Also, do I need to remind you how that dumb bitch wanted to make ponies change the seasons again? Everypony is glad things operate normally now and paying ponies to change the seasons was very costly. On top of that, doing that would require Equestria to pay pegasus ponies for making the weather again, that along with making sure they get paid their pensions. Twilight is an idiot when it comes to economics and I'll be damned if I let her bankrupt the country. I have my own plans on what that money could be used for and trust me, it will be far more useful....not to mention it will get lazy bums out of their parents' basements and actually force them to contribute to society. Long story short: I'm staying as the sole ruler, got it? Staying Equestria's SOLE Ruler, Goddess-Queen Starlight Glimmer