//------------------------------//
// Chapter 11 - Broken People 
// Story: The Moon Has Two Faces 
// by Ether Echoes 
//------------------------------//

Fillydelphia wheeled beneath Light Breeze as she banked and spun over the city. It was as if a whole new world had opened to her, a world she'd been clawing at for years and, in her worst fears, worried might just be fleeting dreams. After not one but two lifetimes of plodding along in two dimensions, she had finally rocketed into three.
"Easy, squirt!" her mother called, shadowing her, and in her voice was an uncomfortable note of worry for a pegasus. "It's the first few hours after your obstacle course. If your wings get tired, just lock them and coast to the ground."
Light Breeze caught a draft of warm air rising off of a rooftop and billowed up to her level, her already messy mane tousled by the wind. "It's cool, Mom! Didn't you say my wings are strong? You saw me at the trials!"
"I did, but I'm getting a pointed lesson in how being a mom sometimes outweighs being a properly fearless pegasus." River Wind flapped her wings, expertly slicing the currents. Light Breeze rode in her wake, letting her break up the rougher air over the river with her superior strength and magic. "If I suddenly fall from the sky, I wake up in a new life. I can't help but think of how we're not likely to be reunited in another life if you do."
Light Breeze's ears pinned back. "I know. I'm not going to reincarnate if something happens, but pegasi fly every day of their lives. Remember when I was little, and I started to freak out about all the things that could go wrong?" She slid up along her side and bumped her with a hoof. "You were scandalized when I said I wanted to exchange my wings for a horn, as if I could just walk into a store and do a return."
River Wind laughed and spun about, scooping her out of the sky to hug her. "I do, now that you mention it."
They arced higher into the sky, the clouds twirling overhead, and as they spun River Wind held her at legs' length before deliberately letting go, allowing Light Breeze to tuck her wings and catch herself. "I trust you, Light, even if I'm going to be a ball of nerves until this is over. It's not fair this was placed on your shoulders. I guess it's not like Equestria isn't sometimes filled with danger, but at least we always have each other."
"I hold you all close to my heart over there, you and my friends." Light inhaled through her nose, reveling in not just the high air, but the crackling burn of her own magic filling her body. It wasn't something most pegasi thought about consciously, the way they drank in the air around them and commanded it by instinct and motion. Perhaps it was the unicorn in her, or maybe the contrast with how dead her human body felt, but it was impossible not to wonder at how her awareness stretched far beyond her body, to test the contours of the wind and even her mother's body, the way she could divine true north even when the sun was obscured, or how every beat and slight shift of her wings could carve the air for far around. Every time she slept, she pulled on a blindfold, stuffed her ears, and weighed down every limb with iron.
Below, large homes sprawled in the outskirts of town. "Speaking of, it's about time I talked to Silver Dust." She turned her head to her mother. "I think I can get home on my own."
River Wind's face betrayed the turmoil between a mother who was proud her filly was striking out on her own and a mother who was terrified something would happen to her the moment she left her reach. "Okay," she breathed. "I've got some shopping to do, so that works out." They slowed to a hover over a tree-lined street, most of the figures trotting by the snow banks below horned. "Light Breeze? You're a good filly. Don't beat yourself up too hard. Like I said… nopony should have been faced with the things you have. Maybe I would have been happier if you'd trusted us before a princess trotted into our living room, but I could never begrudge you being scared."
Light Breeze rushed into her mother's hooves again, the two flapping together as they embraced. "I'm sorry. I want to say that my paranoia from being human was the cause, but… really, what matters is that I messed up, and I'm going to make it better."
"Okay." River Wind slid back. "Love you. See you at home."
"Love you, too." Turning, Light Breeze arced through the trees and landed on the balcony of a big house.
Silver Dust, with wooden stars and planets wheeling about her head in awkward circles, yelped and jumped. The silver light embracing them winked out, and a planet thumped into her head. "Ow!"
Light Breeze winced and trotted over, with wings held loosely at her sides and the lame grin every pegasus who has ever interrupted a unicorn with a surprise visit wore. "Sorry, Dust. Stars and planets drill, huh? At least it wasn't the clock tower. I remember Arc Light's headaches after that one."
Shuddering, Silver Dust picked up the practice pieces one by one. "Don't even mention that. Most ponies don't even know about that drill, for which I'm grateful." She tucked them into a lacquered box and turned to smile at her. "How are you doing? How did your trials go? Apparently pretty good."
Her home, though large, wasn't a mansion. It was funny to her—in the human world, Light Breeze would have resented it, but the income disparity between their families in Equestria wasn't actually all that great. Her parents lived in town, which meant a smaller place, and Silver Dust's dad may have been a baronet, but that hardly meant anything in their day and age. He was a dentist, and landlords didn't even exist.
"I want to be in the air all the time, that's how good they were." As Light Breeze stepped inside, she was struck by the way the afternoon light played across Silver's mane. "You should come out sometime and see me do a few tricks."
Silver smiled and came to press her shoulder against hers, a uniquely equine gesture between friends that put much of her body in contact with Light Breeze. "I'd like that. Wow, your heart is racing." She giggled. "You must be exhausted."
"Y-yeah." Light Breeze scuffed the floor with her hoof. "Hey, Silver Dust, listen… I'm… I'm sorry about… well, I guess it was yesterday. I want to make up for it to you and come clean."
"Okay."
That was the "okay" of "my feelings were hurt, but I understand and am going to hear you out." Swallowing, Light Breeze turned her head to meet her eyes. "The truth is that I… I live two lives. One awake, one asleep."
It was easier than when she told her family. The words came with fewer pauses and no tears, though they did sound a little hollow. Silver Dust listened with quietly growing horror at the tale, pressing closer and closer as though she was afraid Light Breeze might be snapped back to the other world then and there.
"You should have told me!" she squeaked, too upset to put any real force into it. "Oh my stars, Light Breeze…" She tucked her head in under hers, sniffling faintly. "You should have told me."
"I should have," Light Breeze murmured, her own head tucked about hers. It felt good and right in a way being Owen never did, and the life came back into her voice. "I'm sorry. I was wrong, and I lied to you and abused your trust. I won't do that ever again. I promise. I miss you so much when I'm over there, you have no idea."
Her head slid back, and they gazed at one another for a moment, awkward and suddenly shy. Their bodies were close in the room, coats pressed together, and her heart thundered in her ears.
After a pause, Light Breeze stepped back, her face flushed to her ears and wishing she could dunk her head into the icy river. "It'll be okay, though," she said, pausing to wet dry lips. "Princess Luna is on the case, like I said."
"Is there something you're not saying?" Dust asked, rubbing her nose and peering at her. "Even if it's horrible, I can take it. Besides, you promised not to hold anything back, right?"
Light Breeze's wings shifted on her back. "I, yeah, well… it's not about the other world." She rubbed a hoof against her leg, letting the sensation ground her and remind her of who she was. The hoof was the single most profound difference—aside from the magic—between their worlds in her opinion, the symbol of the change. In her art, she sometimes depicted legs as stumpy as a stylistic choice in crowds or when being cutesy, but the real thing was complex and alive.
So was her life on Equestria, but she couldn't rest easily until her other life died.
While she stood there staring at her feet, Silver Dust moved forward and nuzzled at her cheek. "It's okay, Light Breeze. You must be starving. Why don't we go downstairs and have lunch? You don't have to tell me everything that's on your mind."
Pressure built up in her head, and, like when Princess Luna offered to let her get away without telling her parents, she found her mouth opening of its own accord. "I like you."
Light Breeze's habit of blurting out whatever was on her mind had gotten her into trouble before, but the thought of being dishonest, of burying down her feelings once again, was too much to bear. Even so, she couldn't help covering her mouth as her entire face burned.
Silver Dust turned in place midway to the door, one hoof poised in shock, to stare at her. "I'm sorry?"
"Nothing," she mumbled, backpedaling to the balcony, but her feet wouldn't go. She'd lied to her family, to her friends, and to herself plenty, and she hated the weight of it. "It's… I really like you, Silver Dust. I didn't want to say anything because… because I don't really know what's going to happen, and I need to keep my… my focus. Ponies don't always survive their magical adventures, and what if I end up worse than dead?" She scuffed her hoof on the carpet. "Worse than that, Dust. I spend half my time as something else, and every second of it is… it's horrible. I hate my body there, it's so weak, and small, and every month it gets worse being a boy and not having my wings. I take all the toxic bullshit of that world home with me if I'm not careful."
She shut her eyes, realizing she was rambling, and sucked in a breath. "What I mean to say is… I like you, Silver Dust, and you're my best friend. I think you're—" she flushed and averted her eyes with a dumb smile "—really pretty. Way prettier than I am, and poised, and cool, but… the thing is, I don't think I'm going to be ready to do anything about it until this is over which might, uhm…" She sighed with her ears pinned back. "It might be a while. I don't even know how I feel exactly, I just know that you're a very, very close friend, and I think you're cute, and you make me feel all kinds of weird, uhm, stuff…"
Silver Dust, once again, absorbed her words in silence. She trotted up to her and peeked around her curtain of sapphire hair coquettishly. "I thought you liked Jake? You're always acting, you know, flighty around him."
"Jake?" Light Breeze peered off to the side. "I don't know. It's all complicated and tangled up, and… and right now, I wish more than anything that I could just be here, forever, and dream like normal ponies do. I want to not have to fear going to bed and know that I won't have to wake up that way ever again. I—"
A hoof planted against her muzzle, the wall snooshing her nose as good as a pause button. "Light Breeze? Deep breaths."
Sucking in a torrent of air, Light nodded and rubbed her leg firmly. "I'm sorry. I must look… super ridiculous."
"I dunno. You say you're used to being someone else until recently, but to me you're still just… Light Breeze." She swayed her tail and peered up at her with her long legs held nervously. "I dunno how I feel, either. I'm, uhm… I guess I'm still figuring things out? I don't even know if I like colts, fillies, both, neither… I guess, uhm… I-I would like to try and find out?" She pressed her hoof to Light Breeze's chest, and she was suddenly aware of every little eddy and current in the air, every mote of dust, and even Silver Dust's very breath.
"Silver!" her mother called from downstairs. "Come down and eat your supper!"
"Coming, Mom!" she called over her shoulder and glanced back, touching Light Breeze's leg—then jumping back a little as she got zapped by static and squeaking.
"Sorry!" Light Breeze ruffled her feathers and quickly tapped the brass of her vanity to discharge. "Pegasus magic going a little haywire. I've felt really strong since flying, and… and since coming here."
"It's fine!" Silver giggled. "Do you want to come with…?"
"N-no." Light Breeze sucked in a breath. "I promised my parents I'd be home in time for dinner, and I'm kind of in trouble right now. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
"Okay," she whispered back, watching her head to the balcony.
Normally, Light Breeze needed a bit of a running start to get into the air, but she simply launched into the air with a beat of her wings and soared into the sky at ferocious speeds. Of course, she had to circle back and apologize for scattering Silver Dust's homework after, but the sheer liberation of flight washed away all of her nervousness and doubt. After two lifetimes spent plodding on the ground, it would be hard to go back to walking again.





For once, as the hour of her bedtime approached with the chiming of the hall clock at nine, Light Breeze leapt to her feet with something like enthusiasm. "Okay! I'm off to bed. Good night, everypony." She turned to find her family staring at her in disbelief.
"What? No last minute flight to the grocery store?" Arc Light asked, and glanced at the projector set up near the back of the room. "No attempt to wheedle Dad into putting on another cartoon reel?"
"Nope! I am actually kind of looking forward to getting a good night's sleep for once."
"You aren't going to pretend to be asleep, are you?" River Wind asked. "You know your dad and I are going to be checking, right? Even we don't go to bed at this hour."
Light Breeze hugged her parents. "I know, but I promise, it's not a deception. I mean, leaving aside that getting to fly on my own for the first time today was everything I've ever wanted, the sooner I get to bed is the sooner Princess Luna rescues me, which means I won't have the sword of my fake family shadowing every move I make from now on. It's not going to happen until I sleep, so I kinda want to get it over with."
"Fair enough." Her father came over and wrapped her in his hooves, pressing in tightly. "You're going into danger again, and I don't like it. I especially don't like that I have to stand on the sidelines and wait instead of going in with you. Just play it safe and let the princess take care of everything, okay?"
"I will." Light Breeze nodded and took the stairs. She brushed her teeth, showered, preened, and stood in the doorway to her room, still fluffed from drying off.
The hallway light cast her shadow into a long rectangle across a corner of the bed, its contained clouds shifting endlessly.
Swallowing, Light Breeze resisted every urge to leap through the window and escape sleep for as long as she could and crept forward. "Even when this is over, I'm going to be scared of you for a long time, aren't I? Maybe the rest of my life."
The bed only misted innocently by way of answer.
Putting a hoof to the surface, she hauled herself up like ballast hung from her sides and settled onto the puffy surface. Her magic suspended her, more reliable than any metal, and she gathered some up into a pillow to rest her chin on and shut her eyes.
It took a long time to go to sleep. More than once, hoofsteps echoed in the hall, and the door peeked open, but Light Breeze was determined. Having had no regular sleep schedule for a long while, she suspected her body simply didn't believe she was trying to pass out deliberately for once.
When it came, the abyss slipped over her like a cowl. On the way down, she caught a glimpse of nightmarish thorns scratching at her just before her senses blacked out.





Despite all her best efforts, despite the energy she'd taken going in, she found it hard to concentrate. It seemed that, no matter how long she slept or how good she felt about a day, she would just wind up sapped and tired in her human body in short order.
In truth, it was worse than ever before.
When she'd first come out as herself, it had been like a breath of fresh air. All of the weight and stress she'd carried had melted away. Perhaps it was due to coming down from the high of her first flights, but it shouldn't have left her physically exhausted in another body on another world entirely.
So it was that when she dragged herself down to breakfast that she was faintly listless at first as Frank made eggs and bacon. She scratched idly at rashes through her sleeves, wondering if she’d been allergic to something. The spacious, smooth lines of the cabin did little to help, only serving to make her feel more isolated at the big, white table with Adam and Jeremiah across from her. They'd been talking together in quiet tones, but Light Breeze couldn't focus on what they were actually saying until she had some food in her.
A plate of eggs and hash got put in front of her, and even if they tasted of bacon grease at least it didn't have any of the actual bacon.
The mists surrounding the house rosied with sunlight as they ate. Frank, sitting at the head of the table despite its size, looked pleased with himself. Light Breeze was kind of interested to see what he would attempt for his redemption in the eyes of his children, but not especially hopeful. "Smell that morning air, boys. You don't get pine and mulberry in the city."
"Not unless you buy a candle," Adam said, earning a laugh from Frank and a lesser one from Jeremiah.
"Once we're done here, we're going to suit up and hit the lake. It's fully stocked with small mouth bass, and I'm going to show you all the different ways I know to prepare fish."
"Actually," Adam said, setting down his orange juice, "Remi and I were talking, and we were going to head out on a hike. You know - bit of exercise and prayer in God's greatest temple. He's got to think about college, and I wanted to sing him the merits of Liberty. It's been a real transformative experience for me."
Jeremiah had, over the years of being hammered for not being masculine enough, learned to hide his emotions, but Light Breeze could see through him. Openly, he nodded and smiled, but the way he poked at his eggs betrayed anxiety. She debated speaking up, but her promise to her father kept her mouth shut.
By the time the day was done, she would never see any of them again.
Frank, for his part, glowed with pride. "That's excellent, Adam. You've grown into a fine young man. Hell, I hope it can do for him what it's done for you. You were always fit, but ever since you started going there, it's like you've been a changed man."
"What can I say? I feel like the light of the Lord is shining through me." He glanced over at Light Breeze, eyes lingering for a moment, but said nothing further, taking his plate to wash.
Light Breeze might not have been able to read Adam as well as Jeremiah, but she knew he didn't really believe in God. He was too quick, his sincerity ringing like tin in her ears, but again she reminded herself that it wasn't her problem. She'd given all of them a chance to be her kin, and one and all they had belittled and demeaned her.
"Let's go, then," Frank said to her. "Grab your plate and wash up, then go get dressed in something warm. It's going to be cold as hell on the lake. I can't wait."





The icy cold that hardly bothered her in Equestria left her cheeks clammy and fingers stinging as she sat next to Frank in a boat overlooking the placid waters of the lake, the water grey beneath a steel blue sky. Mist curled hauntingly from the trees over the surface of the lake, like her growing sense of malaise had taken on physical form, and she hunched deeper into her clothes. Fishing didn't bother her so much, given that she'd gone with her family whenever they visited their grandparents at the beach, but that was as herself with people she loved.
A bucket sat by each of them, and hers was almost filled with smallmouth bass, whereas Frank's had just one.
"How are you managing to do that?" Frank finally asked in disbelief.
"The water over there is warmer," Light Breeze said, pointing to where the surface dimpled before a granite boulder. "There's water bubbling up from an underground spring that's warmer than the surrounding water. You can't fish right on it, though, because it has less oxygen, but if you imagine a ring around there, that's where the bass will congregate in this weather."
Frank frowned, following her fishing line to where it ended dead center in the dimples. "Why are you fishing there, then?"
"Because I'm tired, and I think I've fished up plenty. I'm enjoying the sky. Taking in the air."
She was also whiling away the time in the least offensive way she could imagine until Princess Luna could rescue her.
"I don't get you." Frank cast his line to the unseen ring of calmer, warmer water. "I don't really get any of my kids, frankly. Adam, at least, I know where he stands, even if he's way smarter than most people I know. Jeremiah, he's got his thing, sure, but he and I have an understanding. I don't really care what he does with his love life, no matter what you think. All I care about is that he's not, you know, making himself a target."
"No. I don't know that." She set her boot against the side of the boat, inhaling fresh mountain air and trying to taste the wind without success.
"You're going to be a young man soon, Owen. The world's a fucked up, scary place, and it doesn't treat people well for stepping out of line. The kind of lifestyle they promote on TV and the internet doesn't work for normal people. A man always has to be ready to protect himself and his loved ones."
Light Breeze bottled the urge to tell him that Owen was dead, and he wouldn't have to worry about him much longer. Her frustration must have played out on her face, because Frank cast her a look. "Do you have any idea how badly Jeremiah was bullied when he was your age? It was horrifying. I taught him how to stand up for himself, and lo and behold the bullying stopped. That shit never ends, and sometimes it gets worse when you're an adult. They kill men for acting like he did."
"Maybe being yourself is worth risking death," Light Breeze muttered, watching the ripples around Frank's line. "You've got a bite."
"What—? Hey!" Frank jolted in place and dragged on his line, planting a boot as he hauled it in.
After depositing it in his bucket, Frank turned on the boat's outboard engine and brought them back to the boathouse by the cabin. Towards the back of the boathouse, Frank set one of the bass on a counter by a sink. "Now, step over here, Owen. I'm going to show you how to clean a fish."
Without a word, Owen took the fish, washed the slime off in the sink, and took the knife from Frank's hands. To his astonishment, he neatly cut along the head to separate out the gills, sliced open the guts, removed the kidneys, and cut filets before setting it aside in a cooler.
"Jesus Christ, where did you learn to do that? Have you been watching fishing videos on YouTube or something? Did one of your friends take you fishing?"
"My dreams." The fish smelled revolting to her, but the trick was to take a deep breath between cleanings and do it in one go.
"Yeah, sure." Watching her work, Frank folded his arms and frowned. "Like I said, I don't get any of you, but you most of all."
"Then why don't you just… try and find out or something? Ask us questions, show an interest in the things we care about?" She angrily sliced open the third bass, the scent no longer quite as overpowering. "You dragged us out here because fishing is something you like to do, it's something you think men should do, so of course we should do it."
"It's not about that."
"Oh yeah?" She fished out kidneys from the red flesh with a spoon, her face flushed. "What kind of stuff am I actually interested in? Does it even matter? You probably wouldn't approve of a lot of it." She tried, hard, to keep her mouth shut, but it ran on ahead of her. "I'm not going to have a revelation where everything you say suddenly makes sense. I probably wouldn't have even if you hadn't hit me." That should have been well enough on its own, but still she found more words forcing their way up. "Why did you drag me out here if you're just going to ruin it by doing the exact same things you always have? Couldn't we have just enjoyed nature for a few days?"
Frank's face darkened, and his hands tightened. "You should be grateful. You have no idea just how badly my father would have whipped me for talking to him with that kind of disrespect."
"I thought you wanted to try to connect with me, but all you've done is justify yourself." Light Breeze tossed the fish into the cooler, her breathing heavy. “If you were really interested in making it up to me, you would have been sorry, but you're still insisting that you're right. You aren't coming down to my level to try and understand me."
"I'm your father, Owen! That's how it works." He was huge, and Light Breeze knew she was cruising dangerous waters, but her entire body was itching and sore and she could hardly think straight for her anger. "Look, I get it. You're young, and you think everyone should be equal, but that's not how any of this works. I'm your father, I know better than you, I brought you into this world, and I know what's best."
White rage ignited inside of Light Breeze at the reminder of having been born into the human world, and for a moment she could breathe free and clear, the aches across her body fading. Even so, she remembered her father's words and forced herself to shut up until she could think before speaking. "All I ever wanted out of you was for you to be there for me instead of at my throat," she said quietly. "I'm sure you're better than your dad was, but all I've ever wanted from you was for you to be there for me, to support me. You could have been my dad, but instead all you've ever done is judge me and try to put me in my place. I'm not who you think I am, and one day I'm going to be gone. When I do, I'm never going to look back."
She watched him, waiting for the blow to come. Wrapped in anger and grief, no fear could reach her.
None came, and she stood looking up at him for a while with her jaw set. Part of Light Breeze wanted Frank to say something, to admit he was wrong, to really turn a new leaf. Maybe it was the pony in her, but she actually believed he could do it, could hear the pain in her voice and change. Even if he'd hit her, even if he'd already given his best shot and whiffed, a big piece of her still hoped for reconciliation.
"You'll understand one day," he said finally with a hard, hollow voice, and gruffly took over the task of cleaning the fish. "Go back to the house. We'll eat in a bit."
It was like a line being cut. Light Breeze felt untethered, and when she looked at him again she just saw a kind of sad man approaching middle years, not the monster who had terrified her.
She opened her mouth, thinking of all the words she might say to try and reach out to him, but a weight filled her throat.
It wasn't her problem, she realized. It wasn't up to her to fix him. He had two sons, a wife, and other people who could reach him if they cared to, but she was free.
With a sense of finality, she washed her hands and left the boathouse, making her way back up the wooden pier.
As she reached the top, though, Adam came up on her side. Strong, broad-shouldered, handsome, Adam had always been the perfect son, and he towered over her. "Hey, Owen. Why don't we go for a walk?"
She looked over to where Jeremiah stood among the trees. "I dunno," she said, shying away from him and continuing towards the house. "I'm pretty tired."
"Your legs are stiff from being in the boat all morning. Come on." He put a hand to her shoulder and steered her towards the trees. "Let's work them out a bit."
Alarms rang in Light Breeze's head. She looked past the house to the road and the sky, hopeful that Princess Luna's dark and terrible form would descend on the cabin. None came, though.
Briefly, she considered bolting, but her human body was about as athletic as Silver Dust's but without the advantages four legs offered. If Adam wanted to chase her down, he could easily do so.
Without a great deal of choice in the matter, and hoping she was just over exaggerating her worry, she nodded and walked along with them. The itching started not long after, and her clarity faded with the growing aches and pains as they vanished amid the pines.