Talk about embarrassing. How could I, the pony that had worked so hard to clear Cozy’s name fail to live up to my own standards? Okay, so I just had to endure some sort of psycho-stability test? That was reasonable. To be quite honest, I knew my mental state had been slowly chipped away from the amount of tough...complications that I had been through so far. Whatever kind of therapy this was, I needed to accept it since it would assist me in keeping my head held high throughout my troubles.
I got out of bed early the next morning, and glanced at the newspaper.
Pale Vestige: Trustworthy or Troublesome?
“What? What is this…” I flipped it open, and began to read the headlining article.
Pale Vestige, the pony known most famously for his work to free Cozy Glow and give her another chance at life, has now been submitted to a form of strict rehabilitation after it has been reported that his violent ways have nearly jeopardized several cases, and possibly linked him to others. After killing Svengallop before he was assigned a trial, apparently this stallion nearly killed another criminal linked to the rumored new breed of changeling that was rising outside of Equestria. Not to mention he is one of only a few individuals that could have reason behind Neighsay’s mysterious death in prison. Is there any hard evidence on the subject? No. Innocent until proven guilty. However, he is not doing himself any favors by acting so rashly. One has to ponder whether or not allowing somepony such as him to have this job was a good decision in the first place. Sure Cozy Glow is fine now, but what if she decides to emulate his behavior and fall back into old habits? This is all conjecture, but it would do the public well to keep a close eye on this officer and his sense of ‘justice.’ Did he really uphold the law?
Or did he uphold convenience for the sake of his own desires to frame as law?
That was...rather damning. As I read over the page once more, I had to face the facts: I had brought this on myself. Yes, Twilight Sparkle gave me the order to kill Svengallop (something that the paper left out), but it was my decision to follow through on such an order. Now, I was being carefully watched, and judged by individuals such as Starlight and Trixie on one side. And on the other? I had to live with the decision that I made and consider how it would affect Cozy above all else. It wasn’t something I enjoyed to think about, but it was a problem I had to face whether I liked it or not.
I left my home that day, and to my surprise, ponies were rather wary of me. It wasn’t hard to notice a few blank stares, but things got really odd when others started to hurry out of my presence. Yeesh, was a newspaper article enough to sway the public opinion so quickly?
Things got worse when I attempted to visit the local retirement home as I always did every morning. One of the workers hurried to the front door to greet me before I could get inside.
I had seen his face several times since I visited frequently, so I tried to make small talk. “Oh, hello, Mr--”
“Shh! Hey, listen...I’d recommend you stay away. At least for now,” he said with a concerned frown as he bashfully rubbed his hoof into the ground. “I’m sorry…”
“...” I sighed, “The local news article, huh?”
He nodded. “Yeah. Granted, I know you’re a decent pony, but we can’t risk any...problems arising from you being here.”
I tilted my head. “Problems?”
“Well...if you start coming here, then we could see donations drop if investors knew you supported us. Like I said...best to lie low for a while. Not much else you can do.”
Pity, though not unexpected. I would rather exile myself than cause undue stress for the elderly if they couldn’t get funding. Damn it all. But as he said, there was nothing I could do. I had walked this path, and I had to see it through.
“Understandable, have a nice day,” I tipped my hat, and pranced away at a fairly quick pace. I eventually slowed down to a regular walk, and took a moment to think about what had happened in the last few months as well as my actions. Had I really done the right thing? Was my sense of justice borked? I didn’t know...maybe, maybe not. I just sincerely hoped that Ms. Inkwell’s idea for therapeutic treatment was enough to help me through what I couldn’t understand about myself.
On my way to the Mayor’s office I was stopped by Cozy who had joined up with me on the stroll. “...Pops. I read the paper. Are you gonna be okay?”
I looked around, and noticed that the surrounding area had become suspiciously quiet. Were other ponies avoiding us? Were we being watched? I had no idea. It was hard to pin down. For the moment, I simply tried my best to reassure her.
“I’ll be fine. I just...there are secrets that we all have. Secrets that threaten our lives that we desperately want to run from,” I put a hoof on her shoulder, “Sometimes it may be better to face those problems head-on rather than flee constantly.”
She had an uncertain, doubtful sort of frown on her face as she looked at the ground. “But what if you’re too afraid? What if you don’t know how because all you know how to do is run away. It’s like an unfathomably giant boulder is rushing down behind you and following you no matter how many twists and turns you make. You have no choice but to keep running, and if you stop--you get crushed. I...I’m not ready for that, Pale,” she looked up at me. “I’m afraid.”
“So am I, Cozy...but what if…” I looked up to the empty sky, “What if we could stop, turn around, and catch that boulder of anxiety, then destroy it into tiny, harmless pebbles. If you could do that...would you?”
“...I don’t know it’s just...just too uncertain.”
I could understand that. Though they seemed limited, we all had plenty of options when it came to the subject of how we chose to live our lives and deal with our own hubris. In the end, it was up to me to not only come to terms with my own, but cut a path and catch that boulder alongside her. If that made any sense.
I gave her a quick hug. “Nothing is certain. Except our goals and trust we put in each other.” I let her go, “You’ll see. Things will get better as time passes. Now do yourself a favor, and go relax with Flurry Heart, okay?”
Her concerned face became slightly hopeful; her wings fluttered a bit with newfound bravery. “I understand, pops. You be safe now, okay?”
“Mm. Of course, I will,” I nodded, and continued onto the Mayor’s office. “Bye for now.”
She left, and arrived safely back home. Good. That was one less thing I had to worry about. Next, it was time to face my own problems.
I arrived at the Town Hall, and was directed towards one of the back rooms. I trotted through the building, and stopped in front of the door. I gave a light tap, and heard Ms. Inkwell’s voice.
“Enter,” she ordered.
And I did. I pushed the wooden door open, and came upon a small waiting room that had been refitted for what she intended to carry out. The tables and chairs had been moved across the bluish-green carpet and off to both ends of the room. Save for three.
In one, sat Raven herself. “Close the door behind you, and take the open seat.”
Said open seat--about one meter across from the other, faced a seated Twilight Sparkle. “Hi,” she said, “I’m just about ready to begin, though I’m curious as to what sort of psychoanalytic methods you’ll be employing Ms. Inkwell.”
The white earth pony scoffed, and pushed up her glasses. “You’ll find out. But this won’t be a pleasant experiment if you don’t cooperate, so listen well.” She clapped her hooves together twice.
Two more of the Mayor’s secretaries came in. Both covered in all black suits that looked like something out of an ancient era with beak-like masks. Theatrics, perhaps? Rather out of style, wasn’t it? Anyhow, they each dangled a watch that both Twilight and I had no choice but to stare at.
“Ooh...I’ve heard of this method,” Twilight commented, “In fact, it was used fairly often when Equestria’s magic was still in its infancy and couldn’t identify what exactly ailed a pony.”
Raven nodded. “Correct, Princess. In this case however, it’s going to help us discern what you both don’t want to come to terms with.”
Really? That...didn’t sound so bad. But I had to be honest, I was a bit concerned for what was about to take place. “Excuse me. But how does this...” I trailed off. I was fully encapsulated as the watch began to sway back and forth. Twilight was in the same position.
After a minute or two, the watches stopped moving, and the hypnotist ponies disappeared from the room. “It’s simple. I will ask you a question. And if you fail to speak the truth, you will hallucinate a dark cloud of lies form above your head. The guilt from those lies will aid you both in understanding what your problems are. The more lies told, the bigger the cloud gets.”
I suppose that’s where the shock factor came in from. Not as dangerous as I initially thought, but still concerning.
“A lie detector?” Twilight had to stifle her laughter, “Pfft--ahem. Er, those have never really been confirmed to be scientifically accurate. But I’m still curious as to how it works and if it’s legitimate.”
“Oh you will,” Raven replied coldly, “You will indeed. Now first, we’re going to start off with a few generalized questions to help ease us both into the matters at hoof without causing any damage. Ready?”
“...Ready,” came my slow response.
“Ready,” Twilight said with confidence.
Inkwell took out a clipboard, and started to read off the first page. “Okay...the Princess shall go first. Twilight,” she turned to the purple alicorn. “After having spent two decades as Equestria’s reigning leader, how do you see yourself? Do you see yourself as having done a good job? Or do you think you could improve?”
“Well, to be honest, even though it’s been twenty years, that’s not very long compared to Celestia and Luna. Do I see myself as a good ruler? Yes, but I could still improve. Though, take my own opinion with a grain of salt since we’re all inherently biased towards ourselves.”
With a pen between her teeth, Inkwell scribbled something down on the clipboard. “I see. Next question: Do you think your subjects prefer the way you rule compared to Celestia’s rule?”
Even I could see that was a more difficult question. Twilight had to pause, and fidgeted a bit in her seat as she thought of an answer. The mere concept of outdoing her former mentor must have eaten her up inside. “Well....that is to say, I’m not entirely sure how to answer.”
Raven continued to sport her neutral expression as she pressed the subject further. “Allow me to rephrase. Do you think you’re doing a better job than Celestia?”
Beads of sweat ran down the alicorn’s face as she applied more thought to it. After a long, gut-wrenched silence, she replied. “...No.”
More silence.
Then we heard a rumbling above Twilight’s head as a small cloud-like shape formed above her head. Was it a hallucination? Or was it really there? Either way, it cast a shadow of judgement over the alicorn.
“...” Twilight didn’t say a word. She must’ve been confused on how that was considered false. To which our therapist explained.
“A lie,” Inkwell commented through her unimpressed stare, “You clearly think you’re doing better than Celestia, but you constantly put yourself down out of some inane desire to not ‘one-up’ her as they say. Get her out of your head. Celestia no longer rules this land and you have too many problems to deal with to be focused on comparing yourself to your predecessor,” was her curt explanation while she scribbled onto the clipboard once more.
Twilight stared at the floor. “I see…”
The Secretary pony turned to me next. “Now...Pale Vestige. What do you think of yourself? Do you like your job?” she asked as she flipped the page on the clipboard over.
That was rather simple. “Yes. Of course I do,” I said with a nod, “I wouldn’t have kept this position for this long if I didn’t.”
Nothing happened. So far so good.
“Mm-hmm. Alright. Do you consider yourself a good officer?”
Another easy question to answer. “Yes again. I do my best to carry out what needs to be done no matter the risk.”
Yet again, nothing. But I could hear the EKG behind me start to ramp up due to my heart rate increasing from nerves.
“Very well,” Raven said in return. “Now. Do you think your sense of impartiality is what this world needs? Do you think that you play a necessary part in the development of society so that justice can be upheld and deception can be erased?”
It took me a moment, but I provided the best answer that I could. “...Yes. If I didn’t, then I wouldn’t have fought so hard for Cozy and the rest of my ideals.”
I waited…
Then it was my turn. I watched as the dark cloud formed above my head.
I felt a sudden surge of guilt in my heart. As if I knew I had lied, and was caught in the act of doing so.
“That was a lie,” Inkwell stated in a chilled tone, “You don’t think you’re up to snuff at all. You know this because you rely on the support of those around you for guidance. But when you act on your own? You’re a beast. An untamed animal who’s just waiting to be let loose on those you deem unsalvageable. That way, you can continue to act as if you’re being just, when you really want to squash all those whose ideals don’t align with yours.” She pointed at Twilight, “And you took full advantage of that side of yourself when Twilight allowed you to kill Svengallop.”
I froze. There was some truth in those words. I knew I wasn’t good enough to handle everything alone and my thought process was not healthy enough to continue this job if there wasn’t any sort of intervention...of course. That was the purpose of the procedure after all. This was the intervention.
“...I see,” was all I could say. Things could only get more trying from there.