//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 - The Adorable Abominations // Story: The Bewitching Bell Campaign // by Leondude //------------------------------// After the disastrous negotiations with the Prench, the brave adventurers wandered into the woods so they could get some wood for their Trojan Pony. “I know what I’d like some wood for,” Rogue said with a sly smirk. “Hey,” Usterlay said, “Keep it foal-friendly, will you?” “Dude, we’re going to be travelling to a place called Castle Clop after we’ve gotten the map piece from the Prench,” Rogue pointed out, “And since the GM said the other map piece is inside one of the concubines of that castle, something tells me this campaign’s going to get less foal-friendly very quickly.” Usterlay gave the GM a concerned look. “I promise I won’t do anything too graphic,” the GM said, “For all we know, the other map piece might be tucked up one of their dresses.” “Or maybe in their super-flammable panty drawers!” Furnus announced. Rogue glared at Furnus, “If one of the drawers contained the map piece and you burnt it to a crisp, I will never forgive you.” The adventurers suddenly paused in their path, for a giant three-headed Beagle blocked their path. “Aw, I love beagles!” River cooed. “Halt!” the Beagle barked, “Who art thou?” Rogue groaned, “Are we really gonna do this song and dance again?” “Yes,” the GM replied, “Just because you like to think of yourself as the most awesome O&O player to have ever graced Equestria doesn’t mean everypony knows who you are.” “Fine,” Rogue said in an annoyed manner, “I’m Rogue and these are my partners in crime. Except replace “crime” with saving the world.” “What do you want?” the Beagle barked. “I just said we’re here to save the world,” Rogue irately replied, “Now are you gonna move or am I gonna kick your butt?”. After another abysmal persuasion roll, the three-headed Beagle refused to give in to Rogue threat. “Really? Another one?” Rogue asked before glaring at the GM, “I swear you’re doing this on purpose.” The GM flashed Rogue a cheeky smirk of her own, “What gives you that idea?” “I’m afraid I can’ let you past,” the three-headed Beagle stated. Rogue cracked her knuckles, “In that case, it’s butt-kicking time. Boys and girls, you know what to do.” “If you’re going to fight us,” one of the Beagle heads said, “Then we’ll have no choice but to kill you.” “Have we?” another Beagle head asked the one next to him. “I don’t think so,” the third head replied. “Well, what do I think?” the other Beagle head asked. “I think kill him,” the first Beagle head replied. “Let’s be nice to each other,” the third Beagle head said. “Oh, shut up!” the first Beagle head shouted, “I want to bite their heads off!” “Oh, bite your own head off,” the third Beagle told the first, “You’ll do us all a favour.” “You’re lucky,” the second head said to the third, “You’re not next to him.” “What do you mean?” the first asked. “You snore!” the second one replied. “No, I don’t!” the first head snapped, “And you got bad breath!” The party just stared at the arguing three-headed Beagle. “If nopony minds,” Furnus said quietly, “I’m gonna turn him into a parsnip.” “You’re not going to use a fire spell on him,” Rogue said with mild surprise, “It’s a miracle.” “Even if it’s trying to kill us, why would I burn a cute little thing like that?!” Furnus exclaimed, “So I cast the Transform into Root Vegetable Spell! And kinda hope Melody has something that can turn the Beagle back into a Beagle as soon as we are done.” After a roll of 15, the three-headed Beagle’s legs shrunk and then all three of his heads shrunk until his body transmogrified into a massive parsnip. Rogue rubbed her belly, “Yum. Now we don’t have to worry about running low on HP any time soon.” Furnus slapped Rogue, “Don’t. Eat. The parsnip.” The brave adventurers lifted the heavy parsnip and carried it with them as they resumed their travels. Despite Furnus’ objections, they would have to eat the parsnip if there were no other options left. As they ventured onwards, they encountered a small pack of bushbabies. “Yay, more cuteness!” Melody squeed excitedly. “We are the tribe who saaaaay…” one of the bushbabies shrilled in a cacophonic manner, “Squee!” The party members flinched at the bushbaby’s utterance of the word “Squee”. “Oh no, not the tribe that says ‘Squee’,” Rogue said sarcastically. “The very same!” the bushbaby exclaimed, oblivious to Rogue’s sarcasm, “We are the keepers of the sacred words, and we demand a sacrifice.” “What is it with cute things trying to kill us today?” Melody asked. “Blame our sadistic game master,” Rogue replied as she pointed to the GM. “We did not say we wanted to sacrifice you!” the lead bushbaby spoke, “But we shall say ‘Squee’ to you again until you appease us.” “What do you want?” Usterlay asked. “We demand...a shrubbery!” the lead bushbaby replied. “A what?” Furnus asked. “It’s a thing with a load of shrubs,” Melody replied. “And what are shrubs?” Furnus asked. “They’re like bushes but smaller and more round,” Melody replied. “You must return here with a shrubbery!” the lead bushbaby demanded, “Or you will never pass through these woods alive! Oh, and make sure it’s a nice one! And not too expensive either! Now…..Go!” The adventurers turned around and made their way to the nearest town, hoping there would be a stall that sold shrubberies. And if there wasn’t, they could always find a stall that sold shrub seeds and have Melody use her druid magic to grow a shrubbery before the bushbabies’ very disproportionately large eyes.