“You gonna be okay Daddy?”
Soarin’ stood slumped over a trashcan, his stomach releasing half digested hayfries and ketchup. Lifting his head, he turned a green muzzle toward Rainbow Blitz, his face contorted in a wobbly frown. Blitz flashed him a guilty smile and scuffed a hoof on the ground, struggling to hold back his snickering.
“S-sorry Dad, hehehe. How was I supposed to know the spinning ride would make you sick? Aren’t you, you know, supposed to handle the… uhm what was it again?”
“G-Force, Blitzy,” Soarin’ moaned back. “And yeah, but when I fly it’s on my own terms. We don’t strap ourselves to some giant metal thing that spins us while we’re spinning around in a bigger circle.” His color began returning to its normal pale blue. “How did you not get sick from that thing?”
“Oh, well Surprise always makes me and Cappy play pin the tail on the pony,” Blitz responded, twirling on one hoof in the process. “She spins us round and round and round and-“
“I get it!” Soarin’ interrupted, his cheeks returning to their previous green color. “The heat probably didn’t help either. What do you say we go cool off in the clouds, Blitzy?”
“NO!” Rainbow Blitz shrieked.
Soarin’s surprised look prompted the colt to test his improvisation skills.
“Uh-uhm no. Probably not the best to go in there after throwing up. Make the whole place smell and uh, do you really wanna feel uhm, mu-mu-“
“Muggy?” Soarin’ asked, his expression softened. Blitz nodded vigorously. “I guess you’re right Blitzy. Let’s go check out some of the competitions, and then we can go on some more rides. But no more spinning, okay?”
“Yeah, sure!” Blitz said, relief heavy in his voice.
The fair’s competitions held judging for cows, sheep, and other hooved creatures Blitz had barely seen before. Though he wasn’t exactly sure why there was a swimsuit portion for the cow pageant, the bulls in the audience seemed to enjoy it. His dad bribed him with a bag of popcorn if he stopped asking about it. Sheep were judged on wool cleanliness, pigs on weight, and it wasn’t until the goat tin can eating contest that the first screams could be heard.
Soarin’ and Rainbow Blitz rushed outside to see a higher class Canterlot mare being swarmed by ants, her purple coat having the addition of moving black freckles. Blitz snickered quietly as the mare shrieked and flailed about.
“These abominations simply will not leave me alone! Help! Somepony help meeeeeeee!”
“They’re just ants,” Soarin’ chuckled, shaking his head at the scene. Lowering his muzzle to Blitz’s level, he continued out of everypony’s hearing range. “Poor thing was probably horrified that she had to walk on dirt in the first place. Probably never saw that anthill coming until it was too late. It’s still weird though. You’d think they’d leave her alone once she cleared enough distance from the colony.”
“Yeah, I guess she’s in a sticky situation,” Blitz cackled. “C’mon Dad, let’s go ride some more rides now. The competitions and stuff were cool, but I want some action!”
“All right, champ. Which one do-“
“AAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!”
Three ponies covered in ants ran past Soarin’ and a very giddy Rainbow Blitz. Blitz failed to hold in his snickering long enough for Soarin’ to put the pieces together.
“What’d you do, Rainbow Blitz?” He asked dryly.
“Me?! I-I didn’t do anything Dad!” Blitz stuttered.
Soarin’s piercing glare forced a sheepish smile on his son’s face.
“Okay okay! Remember how I’ve been going to the bathroom all day? Well what happened…”
Rainbow Blitz cackled as he poured the lemon-lime soda out of its container. The liquid fell into a cumulus cloud he had hidden away behind the restrooms, saturating it with the sweet beverage until it looked ready to pour. Deeming the cloud ‘ready’, Blitz took it and rushed off towards the cloud cooling area of the fair.
A weather patrol worker felt a tug on his tail. Looking down, he was met by the biggest, most hopeful and adorable green eyes he had ever seen. The little colt’s raspy voice and words tugged at each heartstring, playing the right melody to get his way.
“Excuse me sir,” he said, shuffling a hoof on the ground in faked embarrassment. “It’s always been my dream to be a weather patroller, and well um… I brought a cloud to help out. It isn’t a lot, but my mommy and daddy say I’m not allowed to fly high enough for the bigger ones, and I don’t wanna disobey them.”
The worker smiled warmly and for once felt proud about his meager job. Leaning down, he whispered to Blitz.
“Take it to the middle part, little guy. Every bit helps.” He paused before giving Rainbow Blitz a wink. “You’ll make a great weather patrol someday.”
“You mean to tell me you had me buy you colorless soda all day, so that you could pull some little prank?!” Soarin’ said, a look of disbelief on his face.
“It’s not a little prank Dad,” Blitz huffed. He formed a cheeky smile and started giggling. “It’s a big one, hehehehe! I pranked hehehehe the whole fair, or at least most of it. Anypony hehehe who went into the clouds got covered in soda, which got them covered in ants. Hehehehe, the looks on their faces! Priceless, hahahehehe!”
Soarin’s stern gaze stopped the laughter immediately. Rainbow Blitz sat down and looked at the ground, not daring to make eye contact.
“I-I’m sorry, Daddy. I just thought it’d be funny, and nopony got hurt. Fluttershy once told me that worker ants can’t bite through our coat, so I just thought it’d be a riot to ruffle the feathers of some of these snooty Canterlot snobs. I’m sorry for wasting your money, and the soda.”
Soarin’s gaze remained stoic. That has to be one of the cleverest pranks I’ve ever seen. Man, Dashie would be really proud… no! You can’t laugh or tell him how awesome it was! You have to teach him a lesson. You have to be a strong father who makes sure his boy grows up to be responsible and knows to treat other ponies right.
“And?”
“I’m sorry for ruining the fair for other ponies.”
“Aaaaand?”
Soarin’ developed a fierce glare that led to an unintended consequence.
“I-I’m really s-sorry for lying to that p-pony just so that I could pull off my s-stupid prank,” Blitz sobbed, tears starting to fall down his cheeks.
Soarin’ angry gaze crumbled into panic at his son’s display. Oh no no! Too far, too far! Gotta think. C’mon Soarin’ think!
Soarin’ picked his crying son up and stammered any conceivable solution he could think of.
“Who wants ice cream?”
Rainbow Blitz continued crying. Horseapples! That one always works! Oh man, there’s gotta be something he wants…
“How about some funnel cake?”
The sobbing remained unfazed.
“Soda? Milkshake? Games? Rides?”
Each bribe met the same result. Rainbow Blitz bawled while Soarin’ continued to panic. Oh man if the tabloids see this! Wait! What kind of dad am I? Who CARES what the tabloid publishes? Get it together Soarin’, you scared the feathers off your kid. Oh man, what would Rainbow Dash do?
Soarin’ thought back to all of Rainbow Blitz’s tantrums, desperately searching for an answer. There was that time when… no he got a spanking for that. Well how about… no, he got sent to his room and grounded after he did that. Poor Shining Armor, his hair never really did grow back the same way after that. Man, this is even worse than that time he thought there were monsters under the bed… wait a minute…
“Shhhh shhhh Blitzy, it’s okay,” Soarin’ whispered gently. Pulling Blitz into a hug, he stroked the back of his head gently. “Daddy’s not mad at you. Everything’s going to be okay.”
Rainbow Blitz’s sobs faded into whimpers. Soarin’ wiped the tears off his cheeks while giving him the gentlest smile he could form.
“B-but I ruined the fair for some ponies. I even lied to the weather patroller, and M-Mom always said that lying was really wrong.”
“The important thing is that you know what you did was wrong, Blitzy.” Soarin’ explained. Wow, I don’t ever think I’ve seen him actually sorry for one of his pranks.
“Besides,” he continued. “It’s not like anypony got hurt. A good shower will take care of their problem. And lying is wrong, but you made another pony feel good about himself, whether you meant to or not.”
Rainbow Blitz gave his father a small smile. Sniffling, he wiped the last of his tears away. “I guess when you put it that way, it wasn’t so bad after all.”
“Bad? Bad?” Blitz flinched, expecting the worst. Soarin’ chuckled. “Best prank I’ve seen in a long time if you ask me.”
Blitz looked at his father in bewilderment before bursting out laughing. Soarin’ joined in with his bellowing goofy laugh, creating a sharp juxtaposition with his son’s higher pitch.