//------------------------------// // Narcissistic // Story: Daily Equestria Life With Monster Girl // by Estee //------------------------------// Dear Miss Cerea, How to describe Discord? Were he truly among us, there would be very little point to making the attempt. He might laugh at any who tried to do so, and not kindly. There are ways in which he existed as something which actively defied any attempt at definition, and altering his physical form was simply another way of shattering the bonds created by confining words. I intend to attach a picture behind the final page of this correspondence, so that you will at least know what his most typical appearance was. But I am requesting that Miss Nightwatch only display it after the final word has been read aloud. And that when you do see him... it is understandable if you find his appearance comedic. The Princesses themselves believe even that form is a choice, and that he might have initially wished to lure others into a false sense of security. Once upon a time. In the current era, it is equally possible that he simply believed the countenance of the jester would be somewhat less threatening. I do not wish to tell you too much of his past: that is something for the history classes which come as part of the long gallop towards citizenship, and it does not speak to who he was at the last. Who, and what, he chose to become. But I will say this: there was a time when he was the enemy. It would have been very easy to describe him as a monster. He was the enemy. But it may not have been malice with deliberate awareness. I have spoken to many about him, including the one he was closest to in life. She is of the opinion that in many ways, despite his great age (at a minimum, something over fourteen hundred years, and perhaps much more) and occasional displays of surprising wisdom, he is still very much like a child. A rather petulant one, forever demanding attention -- but a child. I ask you to imagine a child happily playing with their toys, moving them about an imaginary world, kicking them to the other side of the room if that movement is not happening quickly enough, swapping parts of figures here and there while rearranging the gameboard with no regard for anything like rules. Now imagine that one day, that child realized that the toys, which had been distorted and warped and sometimes broken, could THINK. She believes that he was still trying to come to terms with it. That given enough time, he would have truly looked back at what he had done, and mourned. The skies themselves might have wept, although 'what' is a question none could answer. But he never reached the opportunity. Or perhaps he simply found a way to atone for every last tenth-bit of it, all at once. The most typical description of Discord is as an incarnation of pure chaos, and I feel he defies even that. True chaos must by definition contain everything, and so it also contains the hint of order which allowed him to exist as something which possessed thought. Call him an incarnation of change. He chafes against stability, feels rules require constant testing, and will take a new form for an hour simply because the last one was held for too long. He MUST create change in the world around him. All things change: he would insist on that, and that for the world to exist in a state of pure changeless order was the truest form of death. All things change. He was once the enemy: you will learn of that, in time. I have asked the Princesses about why they gave him his chance, for they both have reasons to hate him: more than anypony who still lives. They have only told me that they felt he was essential to the future of the world -- and that with an entity who embodied change, there was the potential to change for the better. I cannot say they were wrong. He made a connection. Found a friend: one of the Bearers, our Miss Fluttershy Phylia. And to make a friend, as opposed to simply deciding that one has a FAVORITE toy, or a pet -- one must see them as real. As being, in some ways, an equal. And with that realization, he began to change. Discord had power. There are ways in which his strength was greater than that of any pony known, although the Princesses have suggested that he possesses a few vital weaknesses: in particular, there currently exists a means of placing him in near-stasis at any time, and he was fully aware of that. It is one of the reasons why he did not push the limits of his parole too much: the other was wishing not to disappoint his friend. He had power. More than that: he WAS power. Ponies, and the other sapient species of our world, possess magic. But as Tirek inadvertently taught us, when that magic is pulled away, something of us remains: wounded, but capable of trying to carry on. The magic is in our souls, but it does not necessarily comprise the whole of them. The Princesses -- and, in the time since his sacrifice, a number of other parties -- believe that in some ways, Discord WAS magic. Magic which could take on a form that moved, touched the world more directly, appeared to breathe (if the mood struck him) -- but ultimately, magic. A being of thaums and thought. He had made a single bond, at the start. There came the chance to begin forming others. I cannot speak of what he might have become, should there have been more time. For he existed as something which could think, and the capacity for true thought, added to the recent realization that others were REAL... led to a choice. I brought him to that choice. And the one who had once been the enemy of a world entire -- saved it. Everyone and everything which exists upon this planet. I speak of him in the past tense, because there is so little left. Nothing which displays awareness, or the potential to think once again. I have spent the moons since his sacrifice in a quest to change that. A hero deserves no less. It's harder to run when you have to stay with somepony. My daddy and I talked about evacuation stuff a lot, because there's times when he has to travel to some of his stores and when there's fifteen of them, it means he has to be on trains a lot. The escort network helps, but he says it costs too much to use all the time, even for us, and that it's more important to see the world between the settled zones because that can be the really important part. Plus using the network makes him feel all sick. I used the network with him once and air carriages are better because you know the world is still down there. Teleporting means there isn't anything. It makes him sick, and I don't want my daddy to be sick. But I still think if he used the network more, he could be home more. But my daddy likes to feel like he's a normal pony, even when he isn't. Sick is just for a minute and home is for whole nights. But normal ponies take the train a lot, so that's what he does. And he gallops with me, because that's what a daddy does. But sometimes we reviewed the evacuation routes, because Ponyville is kind of weird. It's mostly been like that since the Bearers got their jewelry, and it hasn't gotten much better since I lost mine. If you live in Ponyville, you're supposed to know how to get out of Ponyville really fast, because the weird stuff doesn't wait for anypony to pack. My daddy and I had a too-big house near the fringe, so the fastest route meant we could get out really easily because the border is right there. But that means we're going directly into the Everfree, which is bad, or towards the Acres, which used to be worse. We're supposed to try and reach the train tracks because those have some spells protecting the route, or use the old road which purels parallels it. That takes longer. But if it's just getting into the woods, we can get out really fast. And because we can leave so fast, we're not supposed to. We have to check on the ponies who can't move that fast, because some of them need help. There's a few pegasi who find the oldest and slowest ones and do pressure carries, and a couple of unicorns who aren't Miss Twilight and can teleport with other ponies going with them anyway. They go for the riskiestest highest-risk cases. But that still leaves a lot of ponies. When it's just me and my daddy running, it's okay. We're both earth ponies and he's always been faster than he looks, mostly because he needs to get from Cookery to Candy before the customer really starts screaming. But when we did the drills, we had to run with all kinds of ponies. Pegasi can take care of themselves, but unicorns are kind of slow. I think that's because so much of their strength winds up in their horn. It's hard to keep up with a unicorn because most of the time, you keep getting ahead and then the unicorn is evacuating all by herself and that's bad. My daddy was in Canterlot when Tirek came. I told you that. He didn't get drained, not then. He was trying to take care of his employees and customers because that's where he was, and he got most of them out. It's not his fault for being in Canterlot, because he's just so busy. He did everything he could to get home and he nearly died. When the town alarm went off, I had to do evacuation at my house and all the servants got out okay, after I made sure they were going the right way and took Cameo with them. (She's my pet and she can fly, but she might have gotten lost. I have to keep an eye on her all the time when we're outside because she's so small. So I sent her ahead, just to make sure.) But there's more ponies than that, and when I looked towards Canterlot and saw Tirek, I thought some ponies were going to be really scared. I was really And they couldn't run if they were just standing in one place all shaking and stuff, or if their wings were locked or they couldn't fly at all. Evacuations have to be done properly. If one pony doesn't get out, then it's all gone wrong and because my daddy wasn't there, somepony had to make sure it went right. That's important. He would not act. Miss Fluttershy has told me that he jested about it: that to act directly would surely lead to a violation of his parole, because nopony recognizes when he is trying to do good. All of that vast power was largely used for his own amusement: something which still created problems because much like the entity, that sense of humor also existed in the singular. He has, on at least one occasion, asked others to move on his behalf: the sole time I am aware of came with multiple extenuating circumstances. But when it comes to the sort of thing we ask our Bearers to do, or the Guard, or any pony who might simply see another within a moment of danger -- he did not personally raise a single talon. We did not seek him during the evacuation because he was perfectly capable of moving himself. And we did not think to request his help, because no help would have ever been expected. I did not mean to find him. I thought I had to find somepony who couldn't make it out on their own, or just galloping all over town was going to feel really stupid. Especially with all the adults yelling at me to come with them or just leave already. They didn't know what I was trying to do and it takes too much time to tell them. I found Sweetie. I wasn't looking for her specifically. Just anypony who needed somepony to show them the way out, and the Crusaders sort of needed somepony to show them just about everything, at least until they started seeing a few things for themselves last year. But I thought they would be together, because they almost always are. After, I found out Apple Bloom and Scootaloo got herded out early. Sweetie's father was in Baltimare. Miss Rarity had to go find the other Bearers so they could figure out what they were doing before the mountain reached us. I'm not sure where her mother was, but I saw her after everypony started to come back into town. Sweetie told me after that she didn't mean to get separated. There were a lot of ponies moving at once and sometimes the little herds move through each other, which is part of why the evacuation drills really need somepony to make sure they're being done right. She's kind of small even now when she's starting to finally get taller, because unicorns are kind of small a lot of the time. So when one group went through hers, it knocked her away and by the time she got up again, both of the little herds were gone and Tirek was getting close. She was sort of bruised and all disorientated and she didn't look like she could get out by herself, so she needed somepony to lead her and I was the one who found her, so that obviously had to be me. I thought it would be easy. The mountain wasn't moving very fast, and there were two of us now. So she helped me look for other ponies and we found a few. They got sent ahead. But the mountain doesn't have to be fast. It just has to get there before you're done. The shadow was on top of us and we were out of time. We nearly died. I told you that too. We nearly died, and my daddy almost died because he was trying to reach us, all the way up until the end he just kept trying to reach us because my daddy loves me and he never stopped trying. But he just would have died with us. So many ponies would have died. If it wasn't for him. For Discord. I had already evacuated my own home. There are a number of children residing there, ones who are engaging in special studies within the city or simply have nowhere else to go. They were safe -- for a little while. Tirek had turned his attention towards the west, perhaps seeking the energies of the Everfree. Or he might have believed that Ponyville might not have evacuated so completely, or that he could catch up to those who were still on their way out. We have the mountain in the capital, and so we have myriad tunnels within the stone: seldom used, unsuspected by most of the populace, but carefully maintained. (I thank whatever magic placed them there.) They can lead to safety, or serve as places in which to shelter. Our nearest neighbor does not possess that level of benefit. Intellectually, I realized that the Princesses would have already cleared the area. But I needed to hear it from a Guard, because I know something of how my friend thinks. The Guard would have been trying to get Princess Celestia out first, and she would have been trying to stay as long as possible. The same would have been true of her sibling: both trying to help until the moment their presence began to risk all. Tirek was well along his new direction. But I had to be SURE. I needed to know that my friend was all right and once I entered the palace grounds, that took but seconds. So after that, I did my best to tend to those who had remained behind, to ensure the evacuation succeeded. They required comfort, those who had been drained. Some needed more than what I could provide, but those who remained were doing whatever they could. There were some for whom no help could be offered. I closed their eyes. And after a time, it reached the point where I was searching the palace for the lost. The drained. Those who might have decided that there was no way forward. It brought me to the tallest tower. You think of the dumbest things when you're about to die. Did that ever happen to you? You've got that sword, so I guess you've fought stuff. Other centaurs, or stranger things. You talked about where you came from as if it was a place where being attacked could happen any time, and maybe that's why you have a sword at all. And if you get attacked, you can feel like you're going to lose. That really only happened to me with Tirek, at least for dying. I felt like I almost lost my daddy once before, but it was the kind of loss where we had to talk for a really long time and then I got punished. But I had my daddy when the punishment was over, so the bad stuff was sort of worth it. Even with all the things which happen in Ponyville, Tirek was the first time I felt like I was going to die. And I was looking up at his hoof, because it felt like that was where the pulling was coming from. I was trying to move and get Sweetie moving and get my daddy to stop moving, but I was looking up too because the hoof was coming down and I had to see how close it was. How long we all had. And there was a lot of shadow, but Sun was still going to be up for a few more minutes and so there was some light too. I saw little glints of metal in his giant hoof. Like he'd stepped on a bunch of really tiny nails with the points all up. Or maybe it was Guard armor. Lunars, because the glints were almost that kind of bright. And then I was thinking about how if you get metal in your hoof, you have to get it out fast because if you don't it's an infection. I thought he might die from infection, with all that metal in his hoof, because he was too big to try getting any of it out. I hoped he would. I thought I should help that happen a little faster because I was going to die anyway. I used to have a tiara. It was my mommy's tiara when she was my age. She gave it to me when I was born. It was really pretty. Cameo liked to ride in the center of it, like a living jewel. (She's a scarab from Saddle Arabia. Maybe I should have said that earlier.) My daddy keeps asking me if I want to get another one and I think the only reason I should is so Cameo can have a new place to rest when we go out together, but I can't find one I like. I used to have a tiara because Sweetie and I gave it to Tirek. His hoof was so big, and it was like everything about the hoof had gotten bigger at the same rate. You have hooves. You know all about the little cracks and imperfections, things you only see with a really good magnifying glass. (I guess maybe you can feel them with your fingers? Can you bend that way? It looked like stuff might get in the way when you bend too much. But those looked sort of soft under the sweater, so maybe you can push them aside?) They're flaws which are too small to worry about most of the time. I'm not sure I have any because my hooves are perfect, but I know other ponies do. And centaurs, because Tirek had them and they'd gotten bigger when he did. Sweetie was looking up too, because she was scared and her soul was getting pulled right next to mine. We weren't going to have our magic for more than another second or two, and then we weren't going to be alive. So I yelled about my tiara, and she understood. I didn't know Sweetie was so good at understanding stuff. I barely had the chance to yell anything before she knew what I meant. Her horn lit up, and she jammed my tiara into one of the cracks. Tirek even helped a little because her magic was sort of pulled up towards where the glints were, just before she lost her corona. I heard my tiara bend and break as it went in, and it made me happy because he'd never get it out again and his hoof would probably be leaking pus in a day or two. Pus is gross. I bet it's worse to have a hoof infection when you're as big as a mountain and your leaking hoof has to take all that weight. I would have been okay with dying next to her after that if I could just get my daddy to leave. I went back to screaming at him and he wouldn't stop trying to reach us. He almost could have been watching the sunset. Sun was a few minutes away from dipping below the horizon. (I told myself that we'd won that much.) The sky was streaked with orange and rose, in those portions where Tirek's giant form didn't block it out. He was just starting to come into Ponyville, and Discord was in the tallest tower, staring into the west. Watching Sun descend, or watching him. It is surprisingly easy to spot emotions upon his features, and I think that is because he exaggerates them. His face is like no other in the world, and that should make him harder to read. But a child hardly wishes for anypony to guess at what they might be feeling. Or... perhaps I was simply trying to understand chaos, up there in the tower. Applying my own interpretation to what I saw, just so something would make sense at the end of the world. I can't say what he was truly feeling or thinking when I came across him, with his arms hooked over a balcony which had raised itself to suit his curving posture. But I have spent too many hours of my life trying to negotiate settlements to end the often-petty conflicts between those who can claim 'noble' in bloodline only. And to my eyes, he seemed strangely like an entity who had been considering an offer. I did not expect to find him there in the tower. (Even after his parole, he never truly lived in the palace. Rumors claim that he has a home of sorts, which his power allows him to visit at will. But if so, perhaps only one has ever seen the modern version, and I am reluctant to ask her for details.) I did not expect to find him anywhere. But you frequently come across chaos when you least expect it. He was looking to the west, seeming oddly thoughtful. And I had moved among those who remained, so many of whom were part of the palace staff. Walked through the ghosts of rumor. Tirek was almost in Ponyville. The Bearers would be waiting there, and the rumor said they were going to try something. Our heroines (and hero) had never truly failed us before, but -- this was Tirek. The greatest weapon our Bearers possess is the strength of the bonds between them -- but that strength expresses itself as magic. None knew what they meant to try, and none knew if it could work. He looked like someone who was mulling over an offer. But his first friend was perhaps moments away from the fight of her life, and it would take place in the west. I asked him what he was doing. (In retrospect, the words slipped out.) He glanced down, and he seemed rather surprised to find me there: his eyes came within tail strands of my monocle before going back to their sockets. But then he casually snapped a talon, and the floor rose up beneath me. It brought me closer to his normal sight line. I suspect he was trying to be accommodating. He told me that he was just thinking. And he kept looking at the sunset. At Tirek's back. It was strange, looking at Tirek. The growth almost matched his pace of travel. He didn't shrink into the horizon: he just took up the same amount of it as he moved. I thought about Discord's power. All of the things he had done to the world when he was its enemy, and all the things he might be able to do for it. But he was just watching, when his friend was potentially on the verge of death. Doing nothing more than serving as audience, for a play in which he still might not see most of the roles as being REAL. The Bearers might have a plan. But it was Tirek, and in that moment, in the presence of power, I thought of Discord as being our last, best chance. A chance which had chosen to simply watch, and one I had found after a long climb of trotting past the dead. It made me angry. I want to believe that it would have angered anyone. I have been angry before when serving as intermediary, for so many nobles can be petty and their little grudges grind against the soul. I do my best to remain calm while planning suitable channels for the emotion. For what happened next, I planned none of it. I told him that Miss Fluttershy was out there. He hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "She can take care of herself," he said. (I have reviewed it so many times as to remember every word.) "She always does. And if it all went wrong, if it went that far --" I remember his talons drumming into the edge of the balcony. Through it, with no damage to anything. "-- I could go save her," he shrugged with uneven shoulders. "That IS what friends do, correct?" "Save her." "Yes," he casually said. "That much would be simple enough. If I was quick. I could take her somewhere that he could never reach --" "-- what about her charges? Her animals?" His tail nearly lashed into my flank. "...yes," he half-spat. "I suppose she would want to bring them along, if only to have something pointless to do when she should be spending that time with ME. Very well: Fluttershy and the animals. All of them. Including the rabbit. And I suppose she'll mope behind her mane for moons if I don't also take the OTHER thing which, for purposes of amusement only, we could describe as her half-tamed pet --" "-- which means they'll need land," I interrupted. A burst of air emerged from his lower lip and ruffled the antler. "This is becoming unnecessarily complicated," he declared. "Very WELL: we also take the cottage. Grass and gardens and growing things in the sod of her roof. Are you quite --" "-- and her friends?" "She has ME. Personally, I feel I'm being unusually generous just by agreeing to bring that semi-feral --" "-- she wouldn't have met you without her friends! You wouldn't know her, or be anything to her if it wasn't for what they all did!" I remember the edge of the balcony glowing with something which was not quite heat. "FINE! For services rendered! Her friends, and I suppose you'd like me to include their FAMILIES in that? Regardless of the risk? Don't you UNDERSTAND?" He hesitated again. "Every second I use my powers within range of --" "And where do they live?" "So we're up to the TOWN now? We started with --" "IT'S ALL CONNECTED!" I didn't mean to shout. I regret that. "If you save her alone, she'll hate you for it! Save the animals and she'll hate you for leaving her friends, bring them along and it'll be resentment for sacrificing the town! Protect the town and she'll never forgive you for giving up the nation! Save the nation and lose the world! If you're her friend, if you ever wanted to protect her, then you have to try to understand! Everything is connected to everything else! You're tied to her, to more than just her, and that ties you to the world! YOU CAN'T CARE ABOUT JUST ONE THING --" "TARTARUS CHAIN YOU!" I know how that must look on the page, Miss Nightwatch. But that is how it felt. As if the words took up the world. He was staring directly at me, leaning forward, overshadowing me as his form began to twist against itself, and I could feel the rage in those red eyes. I could see a million deaths within them, endless varieties of my own demise playing out within near-infinite reflections. The very tower was catching fire around us, and yet the only heat came from his heart. It took me days after it ended to realize what the real emotion had been. That there was hatred, and nearly all of it had been directed towards himself. His last words to me were a scream. The boundless anger of a child taking the first step into adulthood and leaving the protection of petulance behind. "WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE RIGHT?" And he was gone. The fire was gone. The tower was just as it had been, leaving me at the normal level of the floor. I was disoriented, from fear and confusion. I didn't know where he had gone. I tried to hook my forelegs over the balcony's rim, to see what was happening. Light travels faster than sound. I saw it begin. Then I heard it. I did not think about what he truly is. About what would happen. I am responsible. There was a flash of light. I see that light in my dreams sometimes, just so there can be somepony who could see it again. And then Discord was there. He was a little bigger than he usually is, but not much. I think it was just so Tirek could see him better. He showed up between me and Sweetie and my daddy, so he was sort of in the shadow. But the light got Tirek's attention, and I guess he must have looked down or something. I didn't have a good view for that. The last thing Discord ever said was "A world where YOU'RE the only one with magic would be very boring." He snapped his talons. And he sort of expanded, only he did it without getting bigger. It was like watching ice becoming water becoming steam, all at once. He blurred at the edges, and Tirek was pulling at everything, everything and everypony and everyone. Discord turned himself into something which would be easier to pull, and he got pulled first. Tirek just took him in. All of him. Some of it went into the hoof, around the glints. And he laughed, and his muscles swelled more, and the hoof started to become the sky. Then he screamed. Ponies, and the other sapient species of our world, possess magic. But when the magic is taken away, something of us remains. I have spoken to the witnesses who were there that day. The children and Mr. Rich, of course, but also those who were closing in. The Bearers were starting to make their move: they came close enough to see most of it. And of course, at the size Tirek had attained before the end, it was easy to see what was happening to him. Discord IS magic. Thaums which have the capacity for thought. He allowed himself to be absorbed: the whole of his power, everything he was. That included his consciousness. There was a new power in Tirek's body. But there was also a mind directing it, and that mind worked as quickly as it could. There was a hoof above us, as big as the sky. Then it was a fluffy white pillow with feathers drifting down. Then it was a hoof again. But the pulling had stopped. I got up, even when I felt weak and sick. I got Sweetie up, and Tirek's hoof crashed down behind us because his legs were going all over the place. He didn't have any control over them. And when he tried to walk, he didn't always have legs. Tirek had taken in the power of change. That power began to change Tirek. I saw his back distort. There were scales for a moment. Long spikes, like those of a giant cactus. His arms lost their bones, then gained them back in new configurations. He was screaming in agony as his skin bulged, distorted, and stopped being skin entirely. He had absorbed Discord. But he had no control over what he had taken in. That magic had permeated him with a simple plan, because true chaos contains some small amount of order and so plans are possible. Discord took Tirek apart from the inside. Flowed through his body, going for all of the magic which had been absorbed before, and redirecting it. Sending it out. Sending it home. There was power going everywhere. Some of it was visible, like unicorn coronas. There were things like flying heat haze. And there's stuff besides that, because some of it went into me and then I was strong again. Some of the light part touched Sweetie and her horn lit up. But it wasn't all controlled. Tirek was fighting, clawing at himself to make it stop and that was easier when his hands were turning into claws. All kinds of light and haze were flowing over his body, mixing together. Sometimes, a burst would come off. One big one made a crater where the best swimming hole used to be. I saw another head right towards the library, but that's where Miss Twilight was coming from and she managed to deflect some of it. A couple of other buildings weren't so lucky. (I didn't know I'd lost my house until I got to where it used to be, but we stayed with the Belles for a while and there's enough rebuilt to live in. It's smaller now, but my daddy says it's nice to have a dining room where you don't have to shout. Anyway, Cameo and the servants got out, so it's not like we lost anything important after my tiara was already gone.) My daddy was trying to herd us away from Tirek because his hooves were coming down everywhere, and so were the feet and claws and whatever those flat things were. But I still saw most of it. His eyes were glowing, but glow was streaming out of them. And he was screaming all the time, but I didn't care because he deserved it. I saw a few more ponies get their magic back. Then Tirek's head jerked back like somepony had just kicked him in the chin, and something big came off him. A really giant burst, which just streaked off as every color and no color and sort of went into the sky where I couldn't see it. It was like it was turning invisible as it moved. I think that was most of the part which was going to Canterlot, because some more came after it, only not so intense. The directions changed as he got smaller. Different parts of the capital, or maybe going into the Everfree because he got magic from there too. He was getting smaller and smaller, coming down at the same rate as Sun. But his body was also going back to just being a centaur, only his kind of centaur where it's like he's stone everywhere. And when he was down to about your size (or his size because I never saw him when it started), there was something like steam coming off his skin. Tirek fell over. That one hoof was split and bleeding, because it sort of shrank around my tiara. I hope it still hurts. The Bearers were there by then, and Miss Rainbow swooped and tried to cave in his forehead, but Miss Twilight stopped her with a field bubble because she was saying something about not knowing if everypony had their magic back yet and she couldn't be sure what would happen if he died while he still had some of it. The steam kept coming off Tirek after he was on the ground. And then the steam sort of clumped together, and there was almost light. There should have been light, because the steam wanted to become Discord again. It couldn't. I never thought about what he truly was. That he was at more risk than anyone. We have magic. He IS magic, the most powerful entity we know to exist -- but that power still has limits. The Princesses say that magic and minds assembled in bulk could stand against him to some degree, and perhaps that is why he did not choose to face Tirek from the outside: because so much power in a single place might have resisted. Even as the enemy, he never affected the world entire, not all at once. There is a core at the heart of his power, and that power would normally rebuild over time. Lost thaums are restored. But until then... does each effect he creates cost him the tiniest fraction of himself, until energies can return? The best of our thaumatologists have studied what happened, and most now believe that is the case. Like ourselves, he uses his strength to create magic. It is simply that with Discord, his strength is also his self. He might have thought that he could step in just long enough to save that which was precious to him. Even then, there would have been a risk. But to do what he did... I have also wondered if the restoration of our magic did as much damage as the battle from within. He had to send every portion of power exactly back to where it belonged, after all. Something he would have regarded as agonizingly orderly. There was enough left of him to try and separate from Tirek. But just enough for the attempt. There is no consciousness, no thought. The threshold of his energies is below the point which would allow them to rebuild of their own accord. He exists as the barest remnants of a broken storm, carefully moved back to that tallest of the palace's towers for protection. He was the enemy, once. It would have been so easy to call him a monster. He saved the world. He may have died for us. It's my fault. Miss Fluttershy landed right next to him, and her tears were falling all the way through him. Miss Twilight had to keep her from trying to nuzzle, just in case that made things worse. And everypony started to come back into town, Sun was down and Moon came up, the Guards just kind of appeared and put all sorts of chains on Tirek, and all of the pegasi got together and started to move what was left of Discord. They said he might not be dead yet. But he didn't move or talk, and all that's there was something less than steam. There's no light. No magic. He doesn't laugh. I think that's how we'll know he's okay, if he thinks something is funny. We keep asking to see him. To know how he's doing, because the palace says they're trying to make him better. But nopony will tell us, or tell Miss Fluttershy when she was his friend. He did it all for us and we're not allowed to know if he's ever going to be okay. I know it was wrong to hate you for what happened. I know it wasn't you there, because you're not that big and you're softer. But no one ever gave their life for me before. I can't get at Tirek because he's in Tartarus, and I can't see Discord because nopony will let me, and you're just sort of there. I don't know why you're here, or how you got here. But you're here when Tirek isn't and when Discord should be. But I believe you, when you said you miss your mommy. I'm sorry you look so scary. I don't think you mean to. You cried for the ones who died. Maybe you'll cry for Discord. I don't think centaur tears are the cure, but he might appreciate it anyway. You can write me back if you want. I think you need somepony you can write to. But please write in Equestrian. I don't think any of my daddy's clerks know how to read Centaur. And if it's okay, could you please ask the Princesses how Discord is doing? Maybe they don't have a rule yet which keeps you from asking. That sort of thing only comes after it happens. I know. If yes, please tell me. I can teach you how to ask properly. Sincerely Yours Truly With Oh Whatever Diamond Tiara Rich I suppose that in some viewpoints, what I am about to tell you would be seen as classified information. But as it is something which Guards have clearance to know, I am choosing to regard it as informing you slightly in advance. In the time of Discord's enmity, portions of his power would linger after the active (or passive) effects had departed. This energy soaked into the land itself, along with certain portions of the seabed. Where things were at their worst, it left behind what we call chaos terrain: patchwork nightmares where the environment -- and sometimes, the rules -- changes every few hoofsteps. But it also left something else. A rather odious font of information once advised future researchers to think of the world as an oyster of sorts, and Discord's energies as the irritating sand. As much as I loathe the source of this comparison, it remains accurate. Over time, protective layers are built up around those lingering thaums, isolating them. The final result is an ever-shifting jewel: the chaos pearl. Each one encapsulates a small portion of Discord's power. Each one, with that energy discharged into his form, brings us that much closer to restoring him. They are the rarest of jewels, and can only be found in the most dangerous of locations. The palace has been carefully acquiring whatever it can for those known to exist -- but for the most part, we find ourselves needing to hunt them down. Even so, the maximum supply may be decidedly limited. I have consulted with the Princesses on the possibility of finding new pearls, as Tirek was generating a number of strange effects during the battle: possible attempts to fight off the intrusion. This has led some of our researchers to believe that a portion of Discord's power may have been scattered. However, the Princesses have told me that the pearls take decades to form. Ultimately, it does not matter. There are either enough pearls out there, or there are not. The only way to find out is to track and acquire them all. I will collect all of those available in my lifetime and should that not be enough, I hope for somepony else to take up the quest should new ones appear after my death. For now, I will do what I can. I have learned how to track them down, I am traveling with extremely capable, multi-talented and versatile company, and I can see the change in the storm with every portion of energies returned. I will stay in Canterlot long enough to both arrange and host your party. I look forward to seeing you there and invite you to ask me anything you might need to know at that time: it would simply be best to do so in privacy. After that, I will do my best to remain in touch, although I hope you will understand that my travels make it difficult to maintain a regular correspondence. And until we gain the chance to speak directly once again, I ask you to remember this: no matter what anypony might try to make you believe, Miss Cerea, no portion of the multiple tragedies produced by Tirek could ever be your fault. But one of them is my responsibility. And I will not stop. In Hope, I Remain Fancypants Legatus House Paldinia