“Well, that was certainly an…interesting day.” I remarked as I went to get my saddlebag from the peg.
“I suppose you could say that if you call being turned to stone for hours interesting.” Twilight giggled.
“At least we know how it feels to be a statue.” I pointed out lightly. “Even better, no pigeons happened to be passing by.”
“Dusk! That's disgusting!”
“What? It’s the truth and you know it.” We both fell about laughing at that.
It was the late evening now and we had both come back from Fluttershy’s after having some tea and cake, where Twilight had taken down the letter for the lesson about friendship for the day, learned by both Fluttershy and Rarity: don't bite off more than you can chew. In Fluttershy's case, it had been assuming that she could be just as good with kids as with animals. In Rarity's, it was filling out a massive order for capes to Trottingham. There was even another lesson from Leon: That, even when you doubt yourself, you can be able to pull through as long as you have friends to support you. Valuable lessons for them all.
However, me and Twilight had learned quite a different lesson: never ever underestimate the dangers of the Everfree Forest. The day had started pleasantly enough. We’d both went along to Zecora’s, who greeted us warmly into her home. I had noted, with interest, the decor she had from her home, various masks of different meanings and her exceptional skills as an herbalist.
Drinking her herbal tea, I had told her how I made friends with the guys, how I’d come to be friends with the girls, a tale which she was quite intrigued by and even demonstrated my unique power, which she took an even greater interest in, though she knew about as much about why I could do it as the rest of us did: nothing. Even so, I had enjoyed the day there, more because I was with Twilight than anything else. At one point, Zecora remarked how we made “quite a couple”, at which, flushing furiously, we insisted we were just friends. The zebra had apologized for her mistake, but there was still a hint of a smile as she did.
When evening began to settle, we’d thanked her for her hospitality and started off home. We headed back together, just talking about whatever we felt like, enjoying each other’s company. A few times, we’d drifted close to each other without even realizing it. It was only after our sides brushed together that we noticed and gave each other space. Yet… I didn’t really mind how close she got but… I couldn't figure out why.
Before I could, danger had chosen to rear its ugly head, in the form of a cockatrice that caught us unawared. Without really thinking, I had pushed Twilight aside when I saw it coming and had been turned to stone. Despite my efforts though, the chicken-snake had got her too and we’d been frozen in stone for quite a while. Fortunately, Fluttershy and Leon happened upon us and, using a power known only as “The Stare”, Fluttershy forced the cockatrice to release us from stone. She and Leon had to tell us all of this back at her house as we couldn't really remember much of anything. We’d just blacked out after being frozen.
“It was scary though, seeing you being turned to stone, I mean,” she added. “If Fluttershy and Leon hadn’t been looking for the Crusaders…we might never have been found.”
“Let’s not dwell on what has been, but remain in the now and look towards the future.” I remarked.
“You are just full of those pearls of wisdom, aren’t you?” she noted with a smile. “It seems like you always know just what to say to make me feel better.”
“I wouldn’t be much of a good friend if I didn’t, now would I?” I returned her smile. “We just need to learn our lesson in future: keep a better eye out for cockatrices.” We let out a fresh bout of laughter at that.
“Speaking of lessons, I think it was a valuable one that Fluttershy and Rarity learned today.”
“I couldn’t agree more. It seems like every day, there’s a new lesson to be learned about friendship’s magic.”
“Indeed, yes.” All of a sudden, she gave a little laugh. "Hey, I’ve just realized something.”
“What?”
“You and I are both learning about the magic of friendship.” she pointed out. “You and I have never had friends before, even though you did make some friends before. So we’re both benefitting from the lessons when we discover them. I can’t believe I never realized that before!”
“Hey…yes, you’re right!" My grin grew wider at the realization of this knowledge. "Except…you got five friends to start with while I only had three. Plus, you have a head start on the lessons. I’m not even sure if I got any through having the guys for years, so that’s hardly fair.”
“Oh, yeah…” She gave a nervous chuckle. “Well…at least you’re here now. Who knows? Maybe you can catch up sometime on what you’ve missed.”
“Maybe…” I shrugged and tipped my hat to her. “Anyway, it’s getting late. Goodnight, Twilight. See you tomorrow.”
“Oh. Right, yes.” Was it just me, or did she sound disappointed that I had to leave? “Goodnight, Dusk, sleep well. Oh, wait! Just one more thing.” I halted and looked back. “You know those stones you have at your home?”
I cast my mind back to the last time she’d asked me that, all the way back in winter…
“Dusk, can I ask you something?” Twilight inquired as I sipped on my punch and nodded. “What’s with these…rocks here?”
I looked at where she pointed. She was referring to a set of pebbles, five of them no bigger than a cherry, rested on my windowsill. They were jet black except for a tiny patch of color on them, varying in size and jaggedness for each of them. I could understand her curiosity.
“They’re nothing really, I found them on little wanderings that I do.” I explained to her. “I just happened to see them and I felt kind of…compelled to keep them.”
“How come?” she asked, picking up one and examining it.
“I don’t really know…they just seemed interesting.” I told her. “I know. It sounds silly.”
“Not really. To each their own, after all.” she said brightly, putting it back. “Do you just display them here?”
“Pretty much, yes. Sorry, I know it’s not incredibly intriguing…”
“I suppose not. But…maybe we can find a use for them, perhaps?”
“Use?” I raised an eyebrow. “Use how? Fire them from a catapult?”
“No, nothing like that.” she giggled. “I’ll think about it and get back to you on it. Come on, let’s get back to the party.”
“I do, yes. I actually found another one, recently.” I dared to ask: “Why? Have you found a ‘use’ for them?”
“I think I have, yes.” she replied happily. “Bring them here tomorrow and I’ll show you.” She then looked shyly away. "Anyway… I’ll let you get home. Sleep well.”
“You too.” I gave her one last smile, before stepping out into the night and making my way home.
My mind was now analyzing the last few seconds, so I slowed my pace to reduce chances of bumping into something…or somepony. Had Twilight really been disappointed that I had to go home for the evening or was it just me thinking that? Was she always like that when I had to go home and I just hadn’t noticed until today or was it something that had only just started today?
Twilight enjoyed my company and I enjoyed hers, that much I could be sure about. We had lots in common, after all: we’d both lived in Canterlot, attended Celestia's school, were both intelligent and well read, reasonably skilled in magic (In my case anyway), shared the same company of friends, had never had friends before, read Daring Do, it was an extensive list of common interests that we shared. How could I have ever doubted that we wouldn't be the best of friends?
And yet…I had been realizing that, ever since that little mentioning that Fluttershy had made on our walk, I enjoyed Twilight’s company far more than what might be expected from a friend. When I was around her, I felt something that I didn’t when I was with any of the others. Twilight had made it clear to her views on…this particular matter but…could I really be falling for her?
As I crossed a bridge, a heavy rumble bought me out of my meanderings. I looked up to see black clouds blotting out the stars, forked lightning shooting across the sky. The rain fell hard and fast, forcing me to run and take cover under a nearby tree. Just my luck…I wasn’t even close to home and I would be soaked before I got there.
“Dusk! Dusk, is that you?” I turned to see that the Carousel Boutique, not too far away. Rarity was at the door, frantically signaling to hurry over. “Quick, in here! Hurry!”
Realizing I didn't have many other options, I hurried back into the rain and dived through the open door, feeling the warmth of the Boutique from the cold of the rain that had lashed against me. I heard the door slam shut and hooves help me back onto my own.
“Oh, my, Dusk, you poor dear! You’re absolutely soaking!” I felt a warm aura surround me as Rarity cast a spell to dry me off. “Whatever were you doing out in that horrible storm?”
“I was just caught out in it…my own fault, really I forgot they’d planned one for tonight.” I paused to wring out my hat, flicked it, and placed it smartly back on my head. “Thanks for the save, cuz. You didn't have to.”
“Don’t be silly, I couldn’t just leave any friend of mine in a storm like that and not do something about it.” She checked me over. “Are you quite dry? Hat all wrung out?”
“Yes, I'm fine. Thanks again.” I gave her a grateful smile. “I suppose I was just lucky that I happened to be passing the home of Ponyville’s most generous pony.”
“Oh, you…” She tittered a little. “Well, it’s really no trouble. This storm is only going to last for an hour. You can stay in here, nice and dry, until it passes, then head off home.”
“Are…are you sure?”
“Of course, of course. It’s really no trouble. We are family after all. And I shall be glad of a little company.” She set off for the kitchen. “Now, come along. We can have a nice cup of tea and a chat, just like we did when you first visited.”
“I’m touched you remembered.” I remarked, waiting by the same seat as I did last time, while Rarity boiled the water.
I had only really just started being friends with the girls, so they could still surprise me with these unexpected acts of kindness. It was hard to believe that, years ago, I had no friends, didn't think I ever would. And a while ago, I still had some doubts on making more friends like the guys. Hard to believe…
Holding out her cushion for her and sitting myself down, I was the first to initiate conversation: “So, you managed to get all of those capes finished for the buyers in Trottingham?”
“Oh, yes. You cannot imagine what a relief that was.” She poured us some tea, stirred it, and continued: “Yes, it took so long to finish, what with the time it took to make more gold silk, then to weave it into the fabric…well, let’s just say I'm glad to be done with the whole business.”
“I can see that.” I noted with a smile. “Just don’t take on that much work again and you’ll be fine.”
“I couldn’t agree more.” she nodded. “I haven’t felt so stressed than when I was designing my friends’ dresses for the Gala. What a ghastly fiasco that was!”
“It couldn’t have been that bad. You’re a master of the needle and thread.”
“That’s nice of you to say so, but imagine this.” She spread her hooves out before her. “Not only do you have to design six, original, stunning gowns for six different ponies, but you also have to alter them with every single tiny little addition that they bring forward because they’re not happy with them until, eventually, the finished results are…well, quite frankly, ridiculous. I mean, Pinkie wanted streamers on her dress. Streamers!”
“Wow.” I sipped my tea thoughtfully. “That would be tough, even for you. Still, it all turned out fine, am I right?”
“Oh, yes, indeed…thankfully.” she added, then smiling at me. “I’m just glad that your suit turned out well, Dusk. I’d quite forgotten how much simple it is, designing clothes for the gent. I did my best to try and make it…you. You did like it?”
“Rarity, you did a wonderful job and I’m very grateful to you, as I’ve said.” he assured her. “I think it matches me perfectly.”
“That’s what I thought, but it is kind of you to say so." she said, fluttering her lashes at me. “Yes, I wanted yours to be simple and modest, but also make it so you stand out a little in the crowd, to make it sparkle like your wonderful puppets. And it had to match your hat, darling, I simply cannot picture you these days without it. So, I gave you ‘gangster’ style look, simple and smart, but also dashing and refined, adding shine to the pinstripes and tie.”
“I thought I recognized the style.” I noted. "I thought it really suited me just fine. Thanks again. And I can say the same for Shield and the others. They seem to like their suits.”
“Well, to be honest, I may have used the styles of dresses to make their suits and adding some of their own to them.” Rarity said. “Seeing how bold Shield is as much as Rainbow Dash, how close Dog is to Applejack, and how Leon seems to act like Fluttershy, it seemed to make sense to do so.”
“I can see that. What about the girls? I haven’t seen their outfits yet.” I said, my curiosity of how those dresses turned out coming along. “Would you like to tell me about them?”
“Of course! Well, there’s Applejack’s, I 'spruced up' her old work duds, quite simple really…”
I let her carry on in her monologue about the design and thought process she went through for each of the girls’ gowns. I marveled at how easy it was to talk to her and the others now, compared to months ago when I would sometimes be pausing and stuttering all of the time when it came to some-one who was outside of the circle of friends I made in Canterlot all those years ago. Just one of the changes they’d bought about in me that I was thankful for.
After a while, I found myself drifting back into my mind as I began to wonder about something… I had not yet seen Twilight in her Gala dress…how did it look on her? Did it fit her and increase her beauty? What did she think of my own suit? How did she…
“Dusk? Hello? Equestria to Dusk?” I blinked as I snapped out of my thoughts, Rarity looking at me curiously.
“Oh! Um…sorry, Rarity. I was um…lost in thought, I guess.” I felt rather guilty that I’d stopped listening to her.
“You are quite a deep thinker, aren’t you?” she said, with interest. “Care to share your thoughts with the common folk?”
“It’s um…nothing important.” I thought quickly, to change the subject. “You, um…mentioned that, er…you wanted to meet somepony at the Gala?”
“Oh, Dusk! Not just somepony. Him.” Her eyes glazed over as she gave a deep sigh.
“Um… ‘Him’?” I didn’t quite follow. She obviously meant somepony she had affection for, that was obvious.
“Yes. The most handsome, eligible unicorn stallion in Equestria. The nephew of Princess Celestia, Prince Blueblood!” Rarity looked as though she would faint from the very mention of his name.
“Blueblood?” I said without realizing. “I know him.”
“You know him?” She looked at me as if I had just flown in through her window to tell her that she was actually lost Canterlot royalty.
“Well, yeah.” I simply told her, not really liking to talk about Blueblood. “I’m friends with his cousin, so…”
“Sweet Celestia, you’re right! It has been so long that I forgot of your acquaintance with Prince Gold Star! Or should I said ‘Mystic King Gold Star’.” She then went looking at me with eyes full of wondered curiosity. “Tell me, what’s he like? Is he every bit as dashing as they say he is?”
“Dashing” was hardly the first word I’d use to describe the Prince. He was certainly good-looking, I’d say that much, but it seemed that he had to sacrifice any manners for those looks. I remembered when I first saw him…
I’d been carrying a large pile of books for studying, back in Canterlot. I’d just reached the door, when it suddenly burst open and hit me, causing me to drop them all on the floor. I had just started to pick them all up, when the Prince strutted through like he owned the place. He'd glanced down at me, but didn't even stop to ask if I was okay or to help me, even apologies. He'd just walked straight on, leaving me in a heap of books, fuming slightly.
Not only that, but back then, when he and Gold Star would run into each or when that prince would come to visit my friend, Blueblood would always greet Gold with such disrespect, saying that he was just a commoner who got lucky to picked off the streets and adopted as Princess Celestia’s son. It was only after he became the new Mystic King that Blueblood started giving him some aspect of respect. Though I’m pretty sure he doesn’t mean any of it and is just jealous of his cousin getting a higher ranking than him. And whenever he talked to me, Blueblood always talked down to me like I was a servant, somepony beneath him.
It was easy for me to say he was jerk who was too self-absorbed to care about anypony else. But…maybe he would be different with Rarity, if they met. I decided not to enlighten her with what I experienced with my encounters of the so-called prince, instead saying…
“I can’t really say. Didn’t really talk to the guy as much as Gold. Let’s say that he’s everything that you may hope him to be.”
“Wonderful! Soon enough, my love.” she murmured, sighing again. Then, she shook her head and smiled. “But enough about my romantic fantasies. What about you, darling?”
“What about me? What?”
“Dusk, how can you even say that? A young, handsome and remarkable unicorn such as yourself, there must be somepony that you harbor affections for? Or, perhaps, one who already has her on you?”
Blushing heavily from those compliments, my brain went into overload. She knew, she had to! I would have to tell her now, there was no other way out of this. Should I tell her? Was I even sure about how I felt? Perhaps distract her from it…
No…just tell her. Who knows, perhaps she could offer an opinion…or just laugh and tell me this would be a waste of time.
“Well… I suppose that, er…there is… somepony.” I whipped my head up. “If I do say, you have to promise not to tell anypony, okay? Keep it between us…for now?”
“Of course, you have my word. Now, go on.”
“Okay… now I’m not too sure myself yet… anyway…” I took a deep breath and calmed my nerves. “I think that I… have feelings for… Twilight Sparkle.” I hurried this last bit, diverting my gaze elsewhere.
There. I’d said it. I’d admitted it to somepony. When I dared to look back, I saw that Rarity was still smiling, more warmly now though.
“I thought so.” she said knowingly.
“W-w-what?”
“What you just said.” she clarified. “You and Twilight do have a lot in common, spend a lot of time together. I thought that, if anypony would have your affection, it would be her.” She smiled even more warmly.
"B-b-but…I’m not sure if I do…feel that way… about her.” I went on pathetically. “I mean… I don't know…”
“Well, let’s see then.” Rarity said. “Do you often find your thoughts drift to her?”
“Um…quite a bit, I guess…”
“Do you often pass glances at her, one might say, even stare?”
“Um…perhaps…”
“Do you enjoy her company, to the point that it's almost difficult to think of leaving her side?”
“…Yes…” I then stopped her and got to some important facts about my family. “But that doesn’t exactly prove as much of me having those kind of feelings for Twilight.”
“Really?” She asked, still smiling. “How so?”
“Well… Fire Dragons like me are kind of… complex.” I said before I got to explaining what I meant. “Ever since I started acting like this around Twilight, I went to go searching some old Fire Dragon logs and Element Gang Legend stories for some answers.”
“Fire Dragon logs?” Rarity raised a brow at me hearing me say that.
“Yeah, every Fire Dragon in my family has always kept these journals to record their own thoughts and experiences, give a way for the future generations to know who they were and possibly even give them knowledge to help them.”
“Oh, I see. So what did you find?”
“Well… looking to their experiences at finding love, I found out that there were some discrete signs that show a Fire Dragon is in love.”
“Yes, and those signs are?”
“Well… you know how I usually blow out black smoke from my nostrils when I’m mad?”
“Yes.”
“Well, it turns out that, when a Fire Dragon gets embarrassed or… excited in a certain way, they blow out white steam. Though I’ve seen myself do that around Twilight, I’m pretty sure it’s just from a little embarrassment.”
“Uh-huh.” She said to me as she sipped her tea. “And the other signs?”
“Well, the other signs are ones that somepony would have to pay attention to even notice.” I then started listing the other signs. “One of them is with the tail, which you can only tell when it’s not camouflaged. It wags at a fast pace when the Fire Dragon it belongs to gets excited, almost the same way a dog does it when it’s happy.”
“Really? Oh, how adorable!” I blushed when she said that before she gave me a sly smile. “Though I would have to guess I’m not the only pony who thinks this, hmm?”
“Actually, I think you’re the only pony who thinks that.” I lost my blush as I remembered the moment I saw my tail wagging like that. “I’m pretty sure Twilight thought of it as just confusing than adorable. The only time I’ve noticed my tail doing that is when I stopped looking at Twilight when she noticed me doing that. With how I felt with that, I’m pretty sure that the wagging is also a sign of embarrassment.”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, what else could it be?”
“While I do understand that being embarrassed could be the cause of it, I believe that it wags in such a way because you’re infatuated with Twilight.”
“Come on, Rare! It’s obvious that I’m just a little embarrassed because I keep getting that sort of feeling when I look at Twilight when she’s just my friend.”
“Sounds like somepony is in denial!” She used a sing-song voice in her emphasis of that word.
“I’m not denying anything! I’m just pointing out the obvious.”
“Really? Well, darling,” She said before she motioned behind me, “if you are speaking truthfully, then why is your tail wagging in such a way?”
Looking behind me, I was shocked to find that my tail was wagging, fast like an excited dog. Feeling heat rush to my cheeks, I quickly grabbed it and held it close in front of me.
“Now, Dusk, there is no reason to be ashamed. You said it yourself that it is natural.” Rarity said to me, her sly smile becoming a smug one. “And you do not have to become so defensive about such a thing.”
“I’m not being defensive!” I yelled, surprising her. When I realized I just did, I let go of my tail and looked at her with guilt, the heat leaving my cheeks. “Sorry, Rare. I didn’t mean to yell.”
“It’s quite alright, darling. I supposed I did press too far into this.” She took a sip of her tea before motioning me to continue. “Are there are any signs indicating a Fire Dragon’s attraction to somepony?”
“Well, yeah.” I then regained my composition and went on to continue what I was saying. “Anyway, another thing about a Fire Dragon’s tail is that, when they do end up gazing at someone they are attracted to, it would raise itself and the tip and parts close to the tip would curve a bit to form the shape of a heart, swaying back and forth like a slow tempo metronome. It only happens when the tail isn’t camouflaged.”
“Yes, I could see how that would be the case.”
“Well, there’s also something else about when a Fire Dragon gazes at somepony like that. The heart-curving tail is actually a sign of it occurring. This sign is quite the odd one.”
“Well, what is it?”
“Well… you see… when a Fire Dragon gazes at somepony in a sense of attraction, they’re pupils and irises of their eyes actually change to becoming heart-shaped.”
“Really?” She asked, oddly sounding just a little surprised.
“I know, it’s odd. Nopony is exactly sure why that happens. Even when you approach it scientifically, there’s no way to explain it. It’s just part of Fire Dragon biology. Weirdest thing is that it just stops when a Fire Dragon starts having that attraction of theirs returned by the pony they are attracted to.”
“I suppose that is quite the mystery.”
“With that said, unless I was able to look at myself as it happens, there is no way to tell if I show those signs. It cut outs as soon as I try to see if my tail is curved or not.”
“Well…” Rarity put her cup down as she looked at me with a knowing smile. “You might not, but it doesn’t mean somepony else doesn't see it.”
“What do you mean?” I was confused by this. What did she mean by that?
“Actually, darling… I knew all about this situation you were having.”
“What?!” I was shocked. She actually knew that I was acting like this? How did she know? “How?”
“To tell you the truth, it was actually Spike who told me all that what was happening.” She then started to explain. “You see, you didn’t know it, but Spike had seen the way you’ve been acting with Twilight.”
“Why did he tell you?”
“Spike thought that it was for the best to tell you about this, considering how you are. No offense, darling, but you aren’t exactly know for taking such news.”
“So he didn’t tell me about my weird behavior because he didn’t want to worry me?”
“Of course. He is your friend after all.”
“Yeah, he is.” I couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Spike being a good friend. “So I guess he came to you because he thought you would understand as you’re my cousin.”
“Well, yes. And I’m glad to tell you of what he had found.”
“You mean the tail wagging and the steam? Seeing how I usually get comfortable around the library when it’s just me, him, and Twilight, it’d be hard to miss.”
“Yes, but that’s not all he saw.”
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“You did more than that, darling. What transpired before, Spike saw you showing the other three signs. Your tail curved to make a heart and your eyes having hearts of their own, all while you would look upon Twilight with a smile. Though he did not see what he saw, I knew what all this had meant.”
“Wait, are you saying that…” I was just shocked by this. I actually had all the signs? Then… I really did have feelings for Twilight.
“There is no doubt about it. You truly have feelings for her, Dusk.” she said confidently, still smiling. “Personally, I think that the two of you would make a very cute couple.”
“That’s, um…nice of you to say so. But…” I added sadly. “She thinks romance is a waste of time, that chasing after somepony who may not even return your feelings is nothing to get your hopes up. I don’t think I have much of a chance.”
“I don’t think so, dear. From what Twilight told us, she thought much the same of friendship once upon a time. Now look at her. I’m sure that, in time, she would start to look at romance in much the same light. It may take some time, but she will.”
“But…how will I know if she even feels the same way?”
“Most times, you can’t. But that’s the thrill of love, not quite knowing but that elation you feel when you realize they do feel the same…” She sighed again. “There's nothing else like it.”
I nodded at this. “So…you think I might…have a chance with her?”
“I don't think you will, I know you will.” she said confidently. “We’ll keep this between us, as I promised, but if there is any way I can help at all, don’t hesitate to ask.”
“Okay. Thank you, Rarity.” There was one thing I felt he should ask. “Is there anything do you think I should do, you know…to show Twilight how I feel?”
“Dusk, quite frankly, you’ve been doing all of the right things so far.” she informed me. “You two are already close friends, you share much of the same interests. You seem to go out of your way for her, can make conversation easily—oh, and the flowers! That was a wonderful gesture. I’m sure she was grateful for those.”
“She was, yes…so, should I just…keep doing what I’m doing?”
“Yes, do. One thing that scares a girl off is moving too quickly. Take it nice and slowly, pay her the occasional compliment on her appearance or her work. You do that, I’m sure you’ll succeed. After all, you have me helping you.”
“Right. I’ll bear that in mind.” I shyly returned Rarity's smile. At least she was being supportive of my feelings. Now I admitted it, I felt quite sure that my feelings for Twilight went beyond friendship.
“Oh, look! The storm’s passed.” I looked to see that the rain had indeed stopped. “I suppose all of our talk of romance chased the clouds away.”
“Perhaps it did.” I finished my tea, then stood up to go. “Well, I’d better get home. I’ve kept you long enough. Thanks again, Rarity…for everything.”
“It was no trouble at all.” she assured, showing me to the door. “Just remember, anything I can do, just say the word.”
“Right.” Despite the heat that flooded to my face, I returned her smile. “Goodnight, Rarity.”
And I left the Carousel Boutique, setting off home once more, in considerably happier spirits, and of lighter mind, than I ever had been. It seemed daunting, almost terrifying, what I now hoped to achieve. But then again, so had making friends. I would be patient and wait…for now.