//------------------------------// // Hero’s Journey // Story: Half-Life: Pastel Paradise // by I aint no damn brownie //------------------------------// I fell back into the water with a loud ‘SMACK’, and let out a squeal as my injured side came into contact with the liquid. I sat in silence for a little bit, waiting for the pain to pass. When it did, I got right back to work. I put my hoof in the first chipped stone, and then the next. I began trying to jump up the stones, but slipped off as there wasn’t any left to grab onto. I fell back into the water, and let out a grunt upon the rough landing. I breathed shakily as I tried to get the energy to begin climbing again. But I was just.. so.. exhausted. Today has been one big cluster-buck of things, and frankly, I’m ready for it to be over. The aliens, Gordon, the train ride, the fighting, the portal, the royal guard, the safe-house.. It’s all just.. so much. Too much. Combine that all with rapid blood loss, possible radiation poisoning, and a bad attitude; and you’ve got one Tartarus of a combination. I just.. want it to be over. I’m stuck in a damn well, with no way to get out, and frankly, it’s kinda pissing me off. Yet, at the same time, it’s.. draining. I’m tired of moving, I’m tired of doing.. everything. I’ve exhausted all of the.. respectable actions, quote-on-quote. The only option left is to just.. call for help. So that’s what I did. “HELP ME!! SOMEPONY! HEEEELLLLPPP!!!” I yelled at the top of my lungs, hoping desperately that somepony would hear my calls. Anypony at all. But hope was lost quickly. Nopony else was out there. They’re all in the Canterlot safe-house. Because I took them all there. My good-willed actions.. are gonna be my downfall. That’s bucking great. Ironic, isn’t it? Or is it? Irony is a very loose definition that doesn’t make sense half the time. But forget it. What’s the point of focusing on the bad aspects? Back to it. I continued to yell, yet my was voice quickly going hoarse. Not good. Yelling was getting harder and harder. Eventually, I just stopped altogether. I’m.. alone, out here. This is it. I’m gonna die in here. My vision is fading. The great Rainbow Dash.. defeated by some toxic mucus and a wishing well. It’s almost.. poetic, in a way. Somepony who talked big game constantly.. defeated by something that made them very popular in the first place. Ahh.. the Mare-Do-Well incident. Good times.. Good times. Pinkie, AJ, Fluttershy, Twilight, Rarity.. I’m sorry I caused you all so much trouble that day. I love you all. I’m sorry I was so cocky all the time. I’m sorry I.. wasn’t good enough. Goodbye. ... “Hey!” “Hey!” “Hey! Pony, are you in here!?” Moonlight Breeze yelled, startling me out of my pity party/acceptance of death. “H-huh?” I muttered, my eyes shooting open. “There you are!” She yelled, gaining a big grin. “Okay, I don’t have much time. Take this!” She said. Moonlight tossed down a rope, and it smacked me in the face. Wait.. did she..? “Come on!” Moonlight yelled, smacking her hooves against the stone. Right! I grabbed onto the rope with my teeth and she began pulling up. Slowly but surely, I was escaping the well. It wasn’t hopeless! I’m gonna be okay! My vision shook, and I gained a massive sense of vertigo. Okay, I’m still losing a lot of blood. Forgot about that. I’m not in the clear just yet. After what felt like ages, Moonlight was able to pull me out. Pegasi are extremely light-weight; so she hopefully didn’t have too much trouble with it. The genetic lottery pulls through in the end.. Always knew it would, heh. I fell to the grassy floor, spitting out the rope. Moonlight collapsed next to me, taking in deep breaths. “Are.. you.. okay?” She asked in-between sucking in gulps of air. I shook my head. “Not really. I’m losing a ton of blood.” I explained, looking back to my injury. I looked away with a gag upon seeing the damaged flesh. Her eyes widened. “Right! I.. have something for that!” She turned her head around and her horn illuminated. A first-aid kit slowly levitated from a pair of saddlebags I hadn’t noticed before. She set it down beside my flank, and opened it up. “Yikes..” Moonlight whispered. She pulled out some alcohol, and turned to me. “This may hurt a bit.” She said, grinning sheepishly. I nodded. “Okay, just tell me when- YEOW!!” I yelled, feeling a brutal stinging sensation. I was about to say ‘Please tell me when you’re gonna do it’ but I guess she didn’t care! She chuckled nervously. “Sorry about that.” Can’t stay mad at the kid. “It’s.. fine.” I grunted. “Anyway.. how did you even get here? How did you know where I was?” I asked, looking over at her. She pulled out some bandages. “Well, it started like this..” Moonlight Breeze watched in fear as the blue rainbow-maned pony flew off quickly, due to being struck by that strange liquid. She had began to yell, and her parting words were “M-Moonlight, stay here! Lock up!” And that’s exactly what Moonlight did. She turned around, walked into the store, and sat in a wooden chair. ... She adjusted her seating position slightly. It was rather uncomfortable. ... She was thirsty. She should get some water. She got up, went to one of the aisles, and grabbed a water bottle. She brought it back to the chair and drank some. She then set it down on the floor. Oh, but that’s not a very convenient place for it. She grabbed it and held it instead. But it’s kinda cold.. You know, maybe she should just take a nap. That way, everything will be over faster. In the blink of an eye. Like, fast-travel or something. No, wait! Time travel. That’s a good analogy. She closed her eyes, and adjusted her position, letting out a sigh. ... ... She cracked open her eyelids, but then closed them again. .. She was worried about the pony. That liquid didn’t look safe! It smelt awful, and she could feel the heat radiating off of it. It was putrid green, and she could swear she saw some.. uh, skin.. melting off. Moonlight grimaced at the thought. The rainbow pegasus was probably running off to find a source of water to wash it off. The best course of action would be to wash it off immediately, after all. But did she make it to one? The nearest source of water is Knox Pond. It’s a short walk away from this very place, actually. But you have to take.. a.. left turn. That pony took a right. What source(s) of water are on the right? Well, there’s that old well in Bandy Park. But why would she go there? It’s pulley system for water doesn’t even work anymore. Does it even have a bucket? She couldn’t have brought up water. Unless.. unless she jumped right in. She.. she couldn’t have. Nopony has ever been able to escape that well on their own. Not without wings. No, wait-! She’s a pegasus! Duh! She can just fly out. ... Her wings stopped working shortly after she gained flight. ... Moonlight was going to have to run out and get help, wasn’t she? She was going to have to.. leave the building. And.. face those monsters. She hopes that she can run fast enough to avoid them all. She shook her head, and turned to the back door of the shop. She pushed it open and found herself in the break room. It was a tiny little area. With merely a table and some chairs, along with a fridge and a few cabinets. Moonlight ran to a cabinet on the far left wall of the room, and flung it open. She grabbed the first-aid kit sitting inside, and ran out of the break room. She immediately went over to a set of stairs, and began to climb. She reached the top of it, and tossed open the door at the top. Her home. It was a simple thing. For being on top of a building, it was spacious; but still kinda small. There’s two rooms on the left and right. Right door is the bathroom, left is her bedroom. There was a kitchen and living room straight ahead. She ran into her bedroom and grabbed her saddlebags from the closet. She shoved the first-aid kit inside, and ran out of the room. She turned left and ran into the kitchen, where she a grabbed large knife. ..Before putting it away, and grabbing a rolling pin instead. She ran out of the kitchen, and over to her dad’s indoor garage. It was a door that sat inside the living room, and it was right next to her parents’ bedroom. She grabbed a length of rope, and checked to make sure it was sturdy. Yep. She ran out of the garage, her house, the back door, and eventually, the glass doors. The entrance. The doors that had kept her safe.. up until this point. She unlocked the latch, took a deep breath, and threw the doors open. “Okay, let’s hope she’s at the well!” Moonlight yelled, running away from that bull-shaped monster. She dodged one of its shots of mucus, and kept running. It eventually lost interest, which she thanked her lucky stars for. This allowed her a better way to that well! She ducked under a flying crab and continued running. She pulled out her rolling pin, hoping to find some form of comfort in the object. It.. didn’t work very well. She stopped in her tracks, and a zombie dove for her. She jumped out of the way and let it fall. She gripped the pin in her magic tighter, and sweatdropped. The zombie stood back up, and charged her once again. She yelped, closed her eyes, and didn’t watch as the rolling pin smacked its head with a ‘SPLURCH’. She held down her lunch as she watched it crumble to the floor. No time to stand around. That blue pony could very well be bleeding to death. She ran off, desperately trying to take her mind off of what she had just done. She had basically killed a pony. But.. Princess Celestia said not to hold back. So it’s okay, right? She gulped- “Wait, so, you killed one of those zombie guys?” I asked, scratching my head. This kid? Moonlight nodded. “Yes, I did. Now, if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to continue the story you asked for.” She shot back. I blushed, “Right, sorry.” “Anyway, as I was saying..” She gulped, realizing that her princess had told her to.. kill. Her loving, caring, Princess. Well, indirectly. But still! Princess Celestia wouldn’t say something like that. Unless she really meant it. So it’s fine. It’s all fine. Moonlight shook her head, and dodged another of those crabs. She could see the well from here. She just had to- SPLASH She squealed as she narrowly avoided getting hit by the same toxic mucus.. the same toxic mucus that damaged that pegasus. She turned to the direction it came from and saw one of those.. stupid, bull.. squid, things. She turned to run away, but saw another one blocking her path. Seeing no options left, she did the only thing she could do. Raise up her rolling pin, and do.. damage. Painful, agonizing damage. She saw one of them raising its head to shoot, and she yelled. She ran at it top speed, and smashed the pin as hard as she could into its head. A few more smashes did the job, as it fell over; dead. She turned to the other one, and noticed it slowly backing away. She growled, and charged. .. She wiped the sweat from her brow, and nodded. A job well done. Those things wouldn’t bother anypony anymore. She continued walking to the well, completely un-interrupted. She reached the well, tossed the rope down, and pulled Rainbow Dash out. ... “That’s it.” Moonlight said, eating a sandwich she had packed. I put a hoof to my chin. “How much of that was actually true?” I asked, smirking. She blushed. “W-What? All of it!” Moonlight whined. “Show me the rolling pin.” I said. She looked away. “It broke on the way here. I threw it away.” I chuckled. “Sure.” “Man, what a stupid puzzle!” I said as I smashed my hand into the control center, pressing the final button. “Am I glad I’ll never have to write a report on it or something. That’d take forever! Describing the ins-and-outs and shit like that. I’d much rather do an essay on theoretical physics. I majored in that, you know!” Spike chuckled with me. “Yeah, definitely. I’d hate to do a friendship lesson on this. And yes, Gordon. I know you studied theoretical physics.” His smile slowly faded. “Say, what do we do-“ A giant crystal came forth from the right side of the contraption, and fully extended. After that, each individual laser turned off, and a giant laser shot from the crystal; powering up the teleporter completely. I turned to my left, and noticed the open door. “I think we have to jump into that ball thing.” I theorized, putting a hand to my chin. “Really?” Spike asked, just as skeptical as I was. I nodded. “Okay..” He muttered, pulling out his glock. We had found another one on the way over here, and believe it or not, he’s actually a pretty good shot! I know! Someone who’s held a gun once in his life! Crazy. But whatever. Not important. There’s a world to save. I walked over to the opening, and walked out into the crystalline-scape. I walked along the path of yellow crystals, until I came across the metal sheet that allowed me to jump into the floating ball. This little interior room wasn’t much to write home about. Just a bunch of crystals and a giant floating death ball; the usual. I turned to Spike, and motioned for him to go. His eyes widened and he frowned. “No, not again man! You do it! I went first last time!” He yelled, crossing his arms. I groaned. “Ugh, fine. If you wanna be a piss-baby about it.” I muttered that last part. “Nope, not gonna work.” He said, turning away from me. I exaggerated a frown, but turned to the teleporter. I stepped back, got a running start, took a giant leap.. And clenched my toes. PSSHHHEEWWWWW BRRRZZZAAAPPP ZAP-ZIPPP PHWOOM “AND.. YOU.. CANNOT.. WIN..” And landed face first into the floor. Damn it. But, haha! Spike did too. “Damn it!” He yelled. “Same.” I muttered, holding back a snort. Wait, what the hell did that guy say? You cannot win? What does that mean? Who even was that? “Woah, new area.” Spike said, pushing himself off the floor and standing up. He gave me a claw and I stood up myself. Eh, whatever. It’s probably one of those cocky ‘I’m gonna kick your ass’ type of aliens. They’re usually the ones that I can beat easily. The area we found ourselves in wasn’t too exciting, either. The cave structure was interesting though. Instead of a rocky surface, it was a bunch of square shaped rock formations. There was a tiny window on the right side of the cave I could look out of, but I couldn’t fit through it. Bummer. The path on the left was open though, and that lead to more cave. Inside that part was a sick-ass waterfall and a river, which we totally followed. Did NOT drink the water. Even if I wanted to. Spike made sure I didn’t. I made a flying leap to another raised platform, but just jumped off afterwards because the river lead to a bigger area. We followed this one for a while, and I moved away some cobwebs from a pod. Nothing inside. Great. We continued our trek through this area, and came upon a large expanse. There were some crystals sitting around, a floating island with a healing pool, and what looks like a death-claw coming from the ground. Awesome. “You need any health?” I asked, pointing to the aforementioned floating island. Spike looked towards me, and nodded. “Yeah, I’m kinda low.” He said. I nodded my head towards it and he boost-jumped to it. I followed afterwards. Couldn’t hurt to get a little more life juice. I landed in the blue liquid and sighed in relief, closing my eyes. Man, that feels good. “Hey, what’s this do?” Spike asked. I cracked open an eyelid and saw him pointing at an orange crystal on a pedestal. The hell? I raised an eyebrow, “I don’t know. Touch it, see if it does anything.” I said, standing and walking up to him. He tapped it lightly, and it began moving downwards. “Oh shit! What did I just do!?” He yelled, starting to panic. I put up my arms. “Hey, hey! Calm down. I don’t think it’s that big of a deal.” I muttered, seemingly chilled out. Truth be told, I was as worried as he was. After nothing happened for 30 seconds, we both let out a breath. That’s a relief. I walked around the small island, and over to another one of those pods. I punched it and the top flew off, spreading out five lit flares. A bunch of.. rockets? Gee, thanks. I don’t have a rocket launcher. These help! I jumped back to the mainland, and began walking around, looking for any useful supplies. Something tells me.. that something is going to occur. And it ain’t gonna be good. It’s just one of those feelings, you know? Behind a cave wall, I found another one of those pedestals. I tapped it, and it went down again. I feel like I should keep doing that. This feels.. puzzle-y. I found the next one, over by the waterfall. I tapped that too. “He-“ I turned to talk to Spike, only to notice that he wasn’t with me. Odd. Where did he run off to? “Spike?” I called out. “Over here!” He yelled back. Oh, he’s over by that death-claw thing. Suddenly, right next to me, a green flash appeared and an item fell to the floor. A bunch of lit flares popped out. I walked over to it, getting a closer look. A simple cardboard box. I opened it up, and smiled at what was inside. Two crossbows and a shit ton of ammunition. A little note was with it. “Good luck, Freeman and Spike! -Celestia.” Oh, sweet! I grabbed the crossbow and put it on my hook. I picked up the box and ran to Spike. “Hey, Spike!” I yelled. He looked over to me, “Hey, I found another one of those pedestal things.” He mentioned. “Okay cool. Anyway, look at what Celestia gave us!” I said excitedly, setting down the box. He looked inside and grinned. He grabbed 10 magazines, and I grabbed 10 too. There were 20 in all. A perfect split. After putting the magazines in my pouch, I turned to Spike. “So where was that pedestal?” I asked. “Oh, right! It’s right here.” He pointed to a single crystal, illuminated by a green light. I touched it, and it sunk down. Suddenly.. everything began shaking. And.. Gonarch.. crawled out from the floor. No.. she’s.. she’s here too? I was unable to move. I was paralyzed in fear. And suddenly, the worst possible thing happened. An identical one crawled out with it. Two of them.. They squealed, and began to charge. But it was for naught. The ground began to shake, and a giant red tentacle burst forth from the floor. It enraptured Gonarch 1 in its grasp.. and threw it off the island. It did the same with the other one, and the mysterious tentacle came out from the ground. It revealed itself to be.. A fifty-foot tall Bullsquid. It roared, and I could swear that.. at that moment.. My life flashed before my eyes.